Strawberry Gashes

Hey everyone so I have put this chapter off for a while now. I didn't have a good idea on how I should do it but here I am giving it an attempt now. This is going to be a hard chapter for me and to be honest I am not looking forward to typing it. So please bear with me till the end

~YaoiFanGirl1990

Chapter 46- Get Away From Me!

I stood in the dining area looking down at me feet just listening to everything around me as Narul was led out by Sheril with his mother being carried. I know when he got back to the Order everyone was going to be so angry. I just hope it's not at him. I know I am making a huge mistake but it is the only thing I could think of doing that would save Asarina indefinitely. I could feel everyones eyes on me and it sent chills up my spine. Someone getting out of their chair alerted me and I peeked through my hair to see it was Tyki and he was making a beeline straight for me. I just wanted to run and hide but I knew I couldn't. I made a deal and I was going to stick with it.

"You made such a wise decision Shounen." I heard Tyki whisper his mouth inches from my ear, it sent shudders up my spine. I was scared shitless but I refused to let it show.

"Now Tyki don't do anything to the boy yet, we still need to get back home to the Ark and you have a mission to complete." The Earl said and I slowly let out the breath I was holding.

"Yes Lord Millennium." Tyki spoke soon I felt him tightly grip onto the back of my neck.

"Road open up a door back to our home." The Earl then spoke again, I watched Road happily salute and soon a white portal appeared in the room. I felt myself gulp.

"Time to go home." Tyki said and I was forced to walk. He still had his hand tightly around the back of my neck, keeping me from trying to make any sort of escape. I wrapped my arms around myself as we stepped through the portal like door. I had to squint my eyes from the brightness but soon everything became clear and I was standing with Tyki in a courtyard.

"Tyki, Sheril follow me with the boy." The Earl ordered and we followed him into one of the buildings. I was so scared, I didn't know what to expect right now. We walked through the hallways in silence. Tyki was running circles on my neck with his thumb, the action sent shivers through me continuously. It was unnerving and I wish he would stop, but even if I said anything I knew that he wouldn't. I adverted my eyes to my left to look at Sheril, him and Tyki had an uncanny resemblance and I wandered if they were siblings like the deranged twins here.

Soon we were standing in an office and the Earl was digging around in the drawers of his desk for something. I didn't like where this was going. Tyki's hand had removed from around my neck and now he stood behind me his arms wrapped around me. I began to shack and I tried to stop myself but it only caused me to shack more. I wandered what they were going to do to me, probably stick a tracking device within me, but I wasn't sure. Soon my world collapsed when he pulled the thing out. My eyes widened in horror. The Millennium Earl stood there holding a heavy looking circular device, it was also metal. If I wasn't terrified before, I was now.

"Do you know what this is Walker?" He asked and I shook my head no.

"This is a shock collar. I have a perimeter set up that when you go past a certain point it will electrocute you." He explained, my eyes were wide with fear. I tried to get out of Tyki's grasp but I was held firmly where I stood and Tyki only tightened his hold around me.

"I swear I'm not going to run! Don't put that thing on me!" I heard myself scream but the Earl only chuckled evilly before walking over to me. Sheril grabbed onto my head and held me still firmly as the Earl latched the device onto me before stepping away. My eyes went wide in pain when a bolt of electricity shot through me, it hurt so bad I couldn't even scream. My knees had given out and I dangled in Tyki's arms, I could feel my limbs twitching from the risdual pain that was beginning to slowly subside.

"You may take him now Tyki, remember do nothing to him right now you have a mission that starts now." The Earl spoke, Tyki only laughed a bit before I was lifted into his arms and carried out. Everything ached and I just wish I could hit one of them for putting me through this. But that was never going to happen and I was stuck in this predicament. The walk was silent and soon we were in a dark room with no windows. I was tossed onto the bed and I didn't even try to move.

"When I leave the door will vanish so you won't be able to leave, Road will come and get you when it is time from dinner. If you're a good boy I won't hurt you as much when I get back." He said, I didn't say anything and I watched him leave. When the door shut it to vanished.

I had promised Kanda forever and now that promise was broken in the worst way possible. I knew he will probably never stop looking for me, everyone else would but he wouldn't. Sitting up in the bed I brought my knees to my chest and buried my face into them beginning to cry. I was so disgusted with myself. Narul was right we should have brought back up, we could have found another way. I didn't listen though and now look at where I was! I stood from the bed and walked about the room, it was plain and dark. There was only a dresser and a bookcase in the room. I scanned through the books but none of them caught my attention. Eventually I found my way into the bathroom that was in there.

"I guess it couldn't hurt to shower real fast." I mutter to myself and I turn the water on to the shower. I stripped myself of my clothes and soon began going through the cabinet drawers until I found what I was looking for. I picked up the razor and inspected it, the razor hadn't been used much so I didn't have to clean it. I never took my eyes off of it as I walked back to the shower, I stepped into the little area and to under the running water a shiver coursing through me when the hot water cascaded around me.

I sat onto the tiled floor resting my arm onto my crossed leg the bottom of my wrist pointing up towards me. I brought the razor up and without batting an eye I quickly made a few incisions over my wrist. I watched as the blood began to make it's way over my arm staining the clear water red. My mind began to slowly ease into numbness as the pain dulled out. All I though about was how mad Kanda probably is right now. My eyes stung from the tears that pushed forward, I dropped the razor to the shower floor and brought my knees up. I couldn't help the sobs that broke from my mouth and I began to rock back and forth.

"I'm sorry everyone...I'm so sorry!" I cried out to myself digging my fingers into my hair, the blood from my wrist stained my white locks a pinkish color. My world eventually went black and I was just in the black void of my mind, the white lights that usually were there are now red, and that was probably because everyone I was near was a Noah...not human. I dipped my hand into the black water and changed the space around me into the field I loved, but now it was no longer sunny in that world but dark out. I sat in with the flowers and just starred off. I knew I needed to wake myself up before I bled to death, but I just couldn't wake up.

"You cut didn't you?" I heard a voice, but I couldn't make it out of who it was.

"Yay and I need to wake up or I'll bleed to death." I spoke up.

"Then wake up, you don't want to die on Kanda now do you?" It asked and I shook my head no.

I slowly stood to my feet and watched as my little field faded back into blackness, along with the red lights stood hundreds of white lights, but unlike the red lights these ones moved. I reached out and grabbed onto one of the white lights only for it to disperse into many tiny white lights and float up. I turned on them and dipped my hand into the black pool again and let the watery substance spiral around me. I opened my eyes and found myself curled in a ball lying on the shower floor the once hot water now cold. I sat up and starred at my arm and saw that the cuts I made had scabbed over. Even still I stood back up to my feet and turned the water off. I climbed out and noticed that there was a pair of clothes on the counter with a piece of paper that had my name on it. I know it couldn't have been Tyki because he was already long gone on his mission. Shrugging I pulled the clothes and starred into the mirror; my eyes were so lifeless, dead like. After that I wrapped my arm up so that it could heal before heading back out to the room. The room was still dark when I returned to it and I found Road standing there waiting for me with a kind smile on her face.

"Lord Millennie asked me to come and escort you to dinner." She said holding her hand out to me. I couldn't help but smile back to her before finishing the distance between her and I and grabbing onto her hand. Cross said that her and I could never be friends, but I hoped that he was wrong. I would need a friend if I ever wanted to survive in this place. Road seemed to be the only sane Noah around here so she was the only one I'd attempt to be friends with.

Tyki was gone a week and I had done nothing since he had left to go do whatever mission the Lord Millennium had him doing. All I've done was sit in his dark room starring off into nothingness. I've cut a few times but that is always before dinner. Dinner is uneventful since I only keep to myself, Road tries to talk with me, but I can never give her more then a few word sentence. Today though was a bit different, I was sitting on the bed hugging my knees but I was focused on the voice that was coming towards the room. And as I suspected when the door appeared and opened, Tyki stepped through.

"I see you're still alive." He said shutting the door behind him and I watched as it once again vanished.

"I still cut though...what're you going to do yell at me?" I asked, my voice as blank as my eyes were.

"No, I am not going to yell at you. Like I had told you in your head before I understand your need to cut and I won't stop you if you have the urge to do so." He said and I found myself somewhat happy for this. Yet at the same time it made me feel even worst, because if someone truly loved you, wouldn't they want to help you to stop harming yourself. This only caused me to become confused and I wrapped my arms more tightly around my legs and buried my face into them.

"Leave me alone." I mutter hearing him move about the room.

"And why would I do that?" He asked, but I didn't answer him right away. I sat there continuing to listen to him move about the room doing things.

"Why do you keep me caged in this room? It's not like I can escape." I ask, I lift my head up and rest my chin upon my knees watching him. He had just come out of the bathroom his face was slightly wet and he was shirtless. I just gave him a bored look when he shot me a smirk.

"It's to show you who you belong to." He then spat out glaring at me, I guess I hit a nerve with my bored look.

"I don't belong to anyone!" I say tilting my head to the side and absent mindedly starred at the bookcase.

"You belong to me and i will teach that starting today" tyki says in fustration and walks toward me.

"You will never be able to teach me! Just because I promised to never run doesn't mean I won't ever stop fighting you!" I shout turning my head back to Tyki and glaring

"You sound just like Asarina, but look at what happened to her." He says laughing. "I will never forget her screams."

"Shut up!" I yell jumping to my feet sliding from the bed only a few steps away from Tyki

"Why, don't you want to know what happened in in this very room? Do you not want to know what we put her through?." He says smiling and reaches out to touch me

"No I don't want to know! Either way I will kill you for what you did to her!" I shout using my hand to smack his hand away from touching me.

"I think you would enjoy hearing how she almost escaped but then failed. That bitch got what she deserved and i am sure her feelings about sex have changed. She may never trust another man with her again." He shouts and tries reaching for me.

"Stop it!" I shout back side stepping away from him. I didn't want to hear anymore.

"What the earl did to her is the same thing im going to do to you."He says and grabs a hold of me.

"NO!" I scream out and aim a punch straight for his face.

"That is not nice shonnen." He yells backing up a bit to rub his cheek. "You are alot more lively than she was. This is going to be interesting."

"Stay away from me! I will NEVER let you touch me!" I shout stepping back away from Tyki my eyes wide with fear. I tried to urge my arm to phase into my claw or a canon but nothing would happen.

"You gave up your freedom Allen. So i can have my way with you just as the earl did with Asarina." Tyki says smiling and now he is walking toward me. "You will learn that i own you or terrible things might happen."

"I don't care what you say, but I will never stop fighting you, you monster!" I shout beginning to walk backwards trying to keep myself away from him.

"Bad things that could happen? Recaptue Asarina, bring Kalira to the ark, or even better kill Kanda." He says laughing maniacally.

"KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF MY FRIENDS" I couldn't help but scream at him I was getting so worked up I didn't know where I was until my back bumped up against the bookcase.

"You have no where to go now." He says grabbing me and then kisses me. I tried to push him off me but it was no use. I could feel Tyki's hands run up my chest from under my shirt. I could only whimper feeling his lips move from my mouth and down to my neck. His fingers ran over my nipples and I gasped raising my hands and placing them onto his shoulders trying to push him away. He only pushed up harder against me.

"Stop trying to fight Allen it's only going to end with you hurt." He whispered his fingers pinching onto my nipples and I gasped again followed by a whimper. I suddenly got brave and wedged a book off of the shelf.

"I told you I wasn't going to let you touch me!" I hiss out and swing the book hitting him in the side of the head. This stunned him a bit and I ran away from him. I didn't get very far, I felt a hand around the back of my neck before I was thrown onto the bed and pinned there.

"You're not very smart you know that Allen?!" He yells and I fell a hard smack across my cheek as he backhands me. I try to push him off with my hands but that resulted in my hands getting pinned above my head. Tyki began working on getting my shirt taken off the cold air hit my skin causing shivers to run through me. He only released my wrists long enough to pull the shirt off then proceeded to use it to tie my hands.

"STOP!" I screamed but that resulted in another backhand to the face. I bit my lip and kept my face turned fighting back the tears that were threatening to fall. I wasn't going to grant him the luxury of seeing me cry.

"I own you Allen! I will not stop!" He yelled at me and I was smacked again. The hits stung and I won't lie they did hurt. I just wanted this to stop. I wanted to curl up in a corner and cry, cry until I couldn't anymore. Suddenly his hands were running over me again his mouth on my neck kissing and biting onto it. He pinched my nipples between his thumb and pointer finger, a half moan left me but I bit it back biting onto my lip. I bit so hard I could taste blood in my mouth. Tyki began to kiss down my chest, stopping at each nipple taking it into his mouth and sucking on it. My hands grabbed onto the bed sheets as I tried to ignore the sensations running through me. I wasn't going to moan for him.

I wanted Kanda to suddenly appear here and save me, but I knew that would never happen. Tyki's hands worked with my pants and easily unfastened them. He got off the bed long enough to pull both my pants and boxers down. No matter how I moved my legs around I couldn't cover myself up. Tyki's dark chuckle resonated around the room. I knew what was about to come and thought I had mentally prepared myself for it. But I hadn't. I watched as Tyki slowly undid the buttons to his shirt before slipping it from his shoulders. I began to wriggle my wrists in some way to try and get them untied from the shirt. But it was no use, he had tied them so tight I could barely move them.

"Try as you will Allen, you're not getting out of her unscathed." Tyki said and I felt him crawl back onto me this time fully unclothed. I wanted this to end, I didn't want this to happen. His knees were in between my legs and he sat back his hands running over my legs sending chills up my spine.

"Please...no more." I begged but he only laughed before bending over and taking me into his mouth. I gasped out and tried not to buck my hips. I wouldn't give in to any of his touches, but my body was betraying me so much I couldn't help it. He sucked on me hard running his tongue over the shaft.

"Ah~!" I moaned out, I brought my wrists to me and bit onto the shirt to keep any sounds from coming out of me. I heard Tyki chuckle, the vibration from it sending waves of an unknown feeling coursing through me and I groaned out.

'Think of Kanda...think of Kanda!' I began to think to myself, but when I felt Tyki's teeth graze along me my entire mind went blank and I threw my head back. I bit as hard onto the shirt as possible I couldn't stop the moans that came out and I hated myself for it. I was betraying the very one I loved. I had to be a horrible person if I was allowing myself to give in to the touches. Soon everything just stop and could breath even if it was just for a moment. I felt his hands on my wrists and he pushed my arms back.

"Now comes the fun part shounen." He smirked leaning forward and placing his lips upon mine. I refused to kiss back but when he pinched my nipples again I gasped out and he plunged his tongue into my mouth running it along mine. The kiss didn't last very long and he pulled away sitting back onto his knees then forcing me to roll over onto my stomach. I knew what was coming and I began to cry, I didn't want it, I didn't want it at all. I was forced onto my knees but I wasn't allowed up onto my my arms or hands. My head was turned and pressed into the bed my back arched from being on my knees. Tyki trailed his nails up my back before running his hands over my butt sending more shivers up my spine. He did this a few times before I felt something pressing at my entrances.

My hands grabbed onto the sheets of the bed and I bit my lip reopening the wound I had caused and once again I could taste blood in my mouth. Tyki laid over me his hands wrapped around my wrists keeping them pressed down as he left kisses on my shoulder blades. I let out a sudden scream when he pushed into me hard.

He gave me no warning before he pushed in.

He gave me no time before he began to move.

Tears leaked from my eyes it hurt so much. He moved in and out of me his full length barely able to push into me. With every thrust he would hit my back wall, he made it his secret vendetta to hit it every time. I knew I was probably bleeding from the roughness he was using. His hands began to move again running up my sides until they were grabbed onto the inside of my waist holding onto me as he thrusted deeply into me. With every thrust I was pushed into the mattress, I felt like I was about to suffocate because it was so hard to breath. Suddenly I let out a strangled gasp when Tyki's hand grabbed onto my length roughly and began to pump it.

"Please...stop!" I said between breaths but he only sped up and hardened his thrusts, it felt like he was about to break something and he probably was. And then it was over and I felt him spill his seed into me. The tears kept coming but I refused to let the sobs out, I wouldn't cry in front of him. I felt my body hit the bed as he pushed me over after pulling out of me. I felt completely exhausted and my eyes were getting heavy. I didn't want to sleep but I couldn't help it.

My world went black.

I finally came around and I was laying in Tyki's bed still this time though my head was on the pillow and the covers were pulled up to my neck. Everything ached, turning my head I saw that Tyki was also sleeping peacefully. Turning back over I slipped from the bed and headed to the bathroom. For some reason I couldn't explain why my chest felt so heavy. Even between my legs felt abnormal. I dismissed it and turned the light on to the bathroom. All I wanted was a shower and to cut. I looked into the mirror and my world fell apart.

I wasn't starring at myself in the mirror. Standing there was a girl with reddish brown hair down to her knees and silver eyes. But it had to be me, I was the only one in the room. Walking to the vanity I reached out and touched the mirror. Yes the girl I was starring at was me. Examining myself my once deformed arm was normal, all of my scars from months of cutting were gone. And what else the star shaped scare on my face was even gone. I brought my hands up and dug them into my hair new hair. I was slowly beginning to panic. I was about to let out a scream when suddenly there were arms around me and my mouth was covered. Looking into the mirror I saw that it was Tyki.

"Don't you dare scream. This was the only way to make sure you give me what I want!" He said harshly before slowly releasing me and stepping back. I could only stare at him with wide eyes.

"What you want?! CHANGE ME BACK" I yelled at him and he only crossed his arms.

"I want a child with you Allen. Besides the only way for you to change back is if one of us dies. You're stuck like this. You're going to need a new name." He suddenly says and my eyes widen. I begin to back up until my back is pressed up against the wall.

"Kallen, from now on you will be known as Kallen." He says, I let out a sob and slid down to the floor hugging my knees. Why was this happening to me?!

"I hate you."

There you go chapter 46! I did not enjoy writing this chapter, but it had to be done. I hope you enjoy it. Please review and let me know what you think.

~YaoiFanGirl1990