"I don't know, okay! I've never, ever seen half-crystallization before! How do you expect me to fix everything?! I can't!"

With that yell of frustration, Vanille stomps out of the living room, followed briskly by Fang who paused just a second to glare murderously at Snow. Snow, meanwhile, scratches his head nervously. I know he didn't mean to upset Vanille; he was just asking if there was nothing else she could do. Trouble is, Vanille is already very frustrated and terrified with her recent inability. Upon hearing that question, she just… well, exploded.

Sighing, I glance across the room. Everybody is obviously in a solemn mood—even Sazh is not playing cards as usual. He just sits stiffly on the couch, while Hope stares blankly out of the window. Ironic, really… to have this kind of mood right in our moment of triumph.

Because we did win. We won, against the fal'Cie who planned doom for not only us, but the entire Cocoon. We have achieved something impossible, something that has never been done before… Instead of completing or failing our Focus, we have slain our fal'Cie. Now our brands are gone, and the Cie'th curse has been lifted. But strangely, some of us still have our magic abilities. Vanille can still cast some of her healing spells, while Fang can still use some Saboteur spells. The rest of us have more or less lost our magic… probably it has something to do with us being from Cocoon and them from Gran Pulse.

However, all that doesn't mean everything is sugar and rainbow. Quite the contrary in fact… Ever since Barthandelus's death, Cocoon has been in a mess. The fall of Barthandelus—or Galenth Dysley, as the citizens know him—means that the government has lost its Primarch. The citizens are confused and scared, while the Sanctum and the military are struggling to pull what is left of the government together. To make matters worse, Barthandelus's demise also means there is less fal'Cie to sustain Cocoon. Our massive sphere now hangs low, closer to Gran Pulse than ever. We can even ride a common hoverbike into Pulse if we want to—but this proximity only serves to increase the people's agitation.

The bright side of this all? Well, I would say it's having our final battle broadcasted to the entire Cocoon. It seems that without our notice, a watch beacon had survived the initial battle at the outskirts of Palumpolum. It then recorded the entire turmoil, despite it only managed to record the sounds due to its broken camera lens. But that's enough: the beacon has managed to capture Barthandelus's words before he blew up Palumpolum's rear sector, and the people of Cocoon had heard him loud and clear. They heard him shouting furiously, disclosing his plans of destroying Cocoon. They heard us, the l'Cie, fighting him. They finally know… that we, the l'Cie, were not trying to destroy Cocoon at all.

…And they certainly felt the entire Cocoon tremble when Lightning defeated Barthandelus, even though it took place miles away in Gran Pulse.

At this thought, a wave of sadness sweeps through me. It's been a few days since that fateful battle… and Lightning has not yet awaken. Not once. She stays unconscious, breathing raggedly in her sleep-like state. Vanille has tried healing her every day, casting all the magic spells she can muster. But it is to no avail; the crystal still starkly covers half of Lightning's body. According to Vanille, it is probably caused by the after effect of all the injuries Light's sustained during the battle. Technically, those wounds were never healed; they were just crystalized. Maybe that's why she hasn't awaken—her body is still struggling to cope with the foreign crystal etched into her system.

I let out a sigh, looking out of the window again to see the afternoon sun shining brightly. Despite all this mess, at least we still have something to be thankful about… that is, we're no longer treated like criminals in Cocoon. We can go out safely now; in fact, Snow, Hope, Fang and Sazh have made a trip to town recently. They were expecting some sort of aggression from the citizens… but luckily that did not happen. All they received were wary stares, whispers and pointing fingers in barely-concealed manner. It is obvious that the people have not trusted us fully—but at least they leave us alone and let us walk about freely. That's good enough for us, although Snow did lament the fact that we received no applause, no hero-like welcome.

However, this degree of acceptance does not extend to the military. The GC has repeatedly sent their personnel to our house to seek audience with Lightning. Apparently they want details about the fight, about how she defeated Barthandelus and all.

But Lightning hasn't regained consciousness. We told this to the GC every time they come by, yet they keep coming back almost every day. Soon their relentless queries get irritating—until one day a Sergeant mentioned the word 'interrogation' when he asked to see Lightning.

I felt a surge of anger then; but it was nothing compared to Fang's. Well, to put it simply, the huntress snapped. The moment that word came out from the Sergeant's mouth, she slammed her fist to the wall right next to his head. Her message is clear: she won't take anyone treating Lightning like a criminal, while we all know she is the hero who defeated Barthandelus. The Sergeant was terrified—he left immediately. And since that incident, the military sorts of gives us a break. They only asked us to contact them when Lightning wakes up… if she wakes up.

I can't stand sitting still anymore. I stand up abruptly, making my way to the staircase. The others see me, but they leave me alone. I can feel their sad eyes following me as I climb the stairs, a routine I have done so many times in these few days.


"Hey, Light… how are you doing?"

With that whisper, I walk into Lightning's room. As usual, I receive no reply—yet I still feel the pang of disappointment at the silence that greets me. After closing the door, I walk quietly towards the bed across the room.

Everything's still the same.

Lightning is lying on the bed, unconscious, her crystal eye glowing softly under the lamplight. Her bandaged hands are resting above the sheets; there were countless burns on them from Fafnir, and Vanille's weakened magic hasn't managed to heal them completely. Now that I stand right next to Lightning, I can see every detail on her face. I notice that her hair has grown longer—half-covering her crystalized eye. I kinda prefer it that way, though… for it ensures that no one will notice her crystal eye at first glance.

Smiling sadly, I drag a chair over and sit down, my eyes never leaving Lightning's face. At least she looks so peaceful… I wouldn't want her to be in pain.

At this thought, I can't help but glancing at Lightning's midriff. It's covered by the blanket of course… but the memory of that wound is still burning clearly in my mind, the memory of that ghastly, bleeding hole tearing through Lightning's torso. The wound I inflicted upon her. I shut my eyes closed when the image gets vivid; but I know it's useless.

Right… ever since we get back to Cocoon, I've been having these nightmares.

In my dream, I had no control of my body. My body moves by itself, straight to Lightning's room. I recall holding Blazefire Saber in my hand; I recall feeling an utter horror at the realization. I tried to stop myself, but I couldn't. I entered Lightning's room, and… and stabbed my unconscious sister in the gut.

I screamed and screamed, but the dream always continues mercilessly. It is so vivid I could almost feel Lightning's blood splattering all over my hands. Usually this is the point where I wake up, drenched in cold sweat and breathing rapidly. According to Vanille, I really screamed in my sleep—that's why she or Fang always comes to check on me. But when the nightmares keep repeating, I told them not to bother. Ever since then, I locked my room's door every night—not only to keep everyone else away, but also to prevent myself… from moving into Lightning's room like what I did in the dream. Yeah, Light would've called me ridiculous for taking a dream so seriously—but then again, I just don't want to take any risk. I've hurt her once… Whatever it is, a dream or not, I don't want to expose myself to any risk of hurting Light again.

But during the day like now… I would stay by Lightning's side, leaving only to help Hope cook meals for the others. I want to be there for her when she wakes up… when she discovers the crystal covering half her body. We aren't sure whether Lightning had realized it before she lost consciousness or not; Vanille guessed she hadn't, considering the state she was in at that time. So we don't know how she'd react to it once she finds out...

Letting out a small groan of despair, I lean forward to rest my chin on the bed, next to Lightning's pillow. From this angle, I can't see her crystal eye. Maybe that's what I want... Somehow, I still can't bring myself to accept that those crystals have become a part of Lightning, permanently. Shutting my eyes, I snuggle to Lightning's neck, only to feel the coldness of her crystalized shoulder on my cheek.

I huff quietly, pulling back. I really miss her… I miss talking to her, hearing her voice, seeing her deep blue eyes shining calmly. We all want to celebrate the happiness and relief of our victory, but it's impossible to do so without Lightning. It won't feel right, at all.

And that's how we spend our days ever since our triumph—waiting and waiting in worry for Light to wake up.


The late afternoon arrives. The reddish sunrays creep into Lightning's room, marking everything it touches with a tinge of red. Reluctantly, I push myself off the bed and stand up. I send Light a last glance; seeing that she shows no sign of waking up, I huff and leave the room.

I have to go to the grocery store with Hope; our food supply is running low.


Not long after Serah and Hope left, a certain redhead pokes her head into Lightning's room. Seeing that nothing has changed ever since she last checked, Vanille pouts and strides towards Lightning. With her hands clasped behind her back, she bends over the unconscious soldier, green eyes looking down expectantly at Lightning's closed eyes.

"…Wake up?"

Nothing.

"Please?"

Still there is no reply.

Pouting her lips, Vanille leans forward. "We are all worried about you, y'know… I mean, of course you should rest considering everything you've gone through—but please Light, just wake up ASAP, ok?"

With that, the red-haired girl reaches out and pokes Lightning's arm jokingly. "Come on, wake uuup…" she sing-songs.

Poke.

Poke.

Poke, poke, poke—

"If she really wakes up, you'll be dead by now."

Vanille jumps in surprise, squealing as she turns around. The redhead huffs when she realizes it's just Fang—sauntering lazily into the room like she owns the place. With a few swift steps, the huntress walks over to Lightning and gives her cheek two quick pats.

"Hey soldier, wake up! How long are ya planning to sleep?"

Vanille rolls her eyes at this sight, convinced that Fang's earlier comment works well for herself.

"Cut it off, Fang. You'll disturb her," Vanille says, slapping Fang's hand away from Lightning.

"We want her to wake up, right? It's been a while y'know, she must have had enough rest already."

"What do you suggest we do then?" Vanille raises her eyebrow challengingly.

"Well, maybe spray her with water or something..."

At this, Vanille laughs and pats Fang's arm mockingly.

"Aww c'mon Fang; we all know you wouldn't have the heart to do that to Light. You're just cranky because you miss her, right?"

"No, I'm not!" Fang blurts out immediately, a little too fast Vanille noticed. The redhead just snickers, elbowing Fang in the ribs.

"Come on, Yun Fang. I know you're such a baby Chocobo at heart."

"A baby Choco—excuse me? I have the brave heart of a Megistotherian, little one! I'm a Yun, dammit!" Fang protests, pushing Vanille away. The redhead laughs again, avoiding Fang's arm.

"Oh, really? Why, then, are you not exploring the town like the huntress you are and choose instead to stay at home to… watch over Light?"

"I'm not the only one!" Fang gets defensive, jerking her chin at Vanille. "Last time I checked, you are the one who wanders around Light's room like a lost sheep every time Serah's not around."

"Well, I'm just worried! Is it my fault that I was raised with a heart?"

"Oh wow, sure, what are you implying now? ThatIwasn't raised with a heart?"

"Well, technically you were kinda raised with a lance—"

"Oi! Then you were raised with a binding rod!" Fang retaliates. Vanille narrows her eyes at this.

"Gosh, the way you said it makes it sound like child abuse."

"Sensitive, aren't you? See, that's what you get for being 'raised with a heart'—"

"This conversation isn't going anywhere, Fang! You're not even making any more sense!"

"Well you started it!"

"No you started it!"

"Are you serious? You're such a—"

"Whatever you think I am, deal with it! We already got stuck together in five hundred years of crystalstasis so whatever opinion you have of me can go—"

"Keep this temerity up and Light will—"

Fang catches herself there, falling quiet immediately.

Right… no wonder it felt rather odd, bickering with Vanille so freely like this. Usually…

Usually a certain soldier would get fed up and throw some caustic, stern command to stop their 'childish bickering.'

Vanille notices this too. Her posture slumps as she gazes at Lightning's unconscious form, silence hanging heavily in the air.

"But Fang... To be honest, I really do miss her."

Fang doesn't know what to reply. She knows Vanille does; the redhead has been crying herself to sleep every night, every time her healing magic shows little effect on Lightning's recovery. Sighing, the huntress scratches her head.

"Yeah... weird, really, considering she's never talked much."

"You think she knows we are worried?" Vanille asks absentmindedly, staring blankly at Lightning's crystal eye.

At this, Fang laughs bitterly.

"She better does."


Giant fists wreck the earth, rocks shattering like mirrors under their brute strength. Furious roars fill the air, air so heavy with smokes she can't even breathe properly. Every inch of her body feels like burning; every move she makes hurt. Yet she can't stop moving—for her nemesis is going all out to kill her, and stopping for just a second would mean her demise.


I walk quietly into Lightning's room again, squinting in the darkness. I feel around the wall for the lamp switch, sighing when I find it and turn the lamps on. Immediately the room is filled with light.

I'm tired; the grocery store nearby was closed for some unclear reason, so Hope and I had to walk to a further one to get our food supplies. Now that it's settled, I can rest for a while—

"Ugh…"

My eyes widen at that sound; my gaze immediately falling on Lightning.

It can't be…

I hurriedly approach Lightning, immediately noticing how her left eye is moving rapidly in agitation under her eyelid. A tiny scowl forms on her eyebrows as she lets out another grunt.

I almost can't believe it. Lightning… she's waking up! After all the silent stillness these past few days, she finally shows some signs—

However, two things happen consecutively then, so quickly that I almost didn't have time to register what's happening.

First, Lightning's scowl deepens as her head jerks from side to side, as if she's trying to get away from an attack. Then in the next second… her left eye snaps open, brilliant blue amidst her pale face.

I didn't even have time to react—the moment her eye opens, Lightning growls and immediately attempts to sit up, her right hand lashing out in a defensive manner. I hurriedly step back, thankful that we hadn't put Lightning's gunblade next to her; otherwise she might have grabbed it right now and go full Army of One on me or something.

And then something I least expected happens. Lightning lets out a howl of pain, shutting her left eye closed and presses her palm tightly against it.

I gape at her for a while; my mind trying to comprehend what's wrong. Lightning's left eye wasn't crystalised—it should be fine—so why does it seem like it's hurting her? Don't tell me both her eyes are—

I regain control of my body then; without further ado, I dash to Light.

"…Light!"

Her head snaps up immediately, but with a hand still pressed tightly against her left eye. It leaves her crystal eye glaring at me, stark and unblinking.

"Who's there?!" Lightning growls, a growl so menacing that I know she might really attack me if I approach her too quickly.

Her words really shock me that I stop dead in my track. Light has always been able to recognize my voice, even in the midst of battle. Why now…

"Light, it's me… Serah. I won't hurt you," I say quietly, eyeing her closely. She still doesn't open her left eye—but now upon hearing my words she seems more… confused, than aggressive.

That's when I understand. This is one of the problems that may happen when someone awakes after being unconscious for a while: often the body has recovered, but the mind is still stuck in the state before the person falls unconscious. In Lightning's case, she had lost consciousness right after a life-or-death battle. Her mind might still be in the battle mode now; that would explain her aggressiveness.

But Lightning is just Lightning. No matter what happens, she won't hurt me.

And before she can do anything to slip away from my grasp again, I step forward and pull my sister into a tight embrace.


Her heart is beating rapidly. I can feel it pounding against her ribcage—yet Lightning stays still. She doesn't push me away or anything; she just keeps still, as if she is trying to register what is happening.

"Se…rah?"

Tears start to well up in my eyes when I hear her voice. Tightening my arms around her, I nod vigorously.

"Yes, Light, it's me… I'm here."

Hearing my voice seems to finally assure her that it's really me—I feel her hand rest on my back, in a hesitant attempt to return my embrace.

"Where… are we?"

"We're home, Light, at Bodhum. You're safe," I reply quietly, releasing her gently so I can look at her face. To my dread, she still refrains from opening her left eye.

"Bodhum… Cocoon?"

"Yes, home. Can't you… can't you remember anything?" I ask somewhat hesitantly, glancing at her crystal eye. She doesn't seem to have noticed it…

"I can only remember… him… he was furious… battering the ground like nothing else matters…"

It's not hard to guess who she is referring to. Even now that he's dead, I can't help but feel a chill down my spine whenever Barthandelus is mentioned.

"That battle is over, Light. You won, and Barthandelus is no more now. We have nothing else to fear."

"He's dead?" Lightning's head jerks up at this, despite her closed eyes.

"Yeah. You defeated him, Light. Remember?"

Lightning scowls, holding her head as she struggles to get her memories back. Deciding to give her some time, I pull back and stand up.

"Just wait here for a while, okay? I'll go get Vanille—"

Lightning looks up immediately upon hearing this, a hint of apprehension on her face.

"You'll… come back, right?"

Her question surprises me at first—but soon I realize how it must feel for her.

Waking up after a vicious battle, unsure of where she is, nor who she is with… only being able to hear voices, without seeing… it must be very unsettling. But I don't want her to have to feel anything like that ever again. Our long battle is over, and we don't have to wake up fearing for each other's lives anymore.

So I walk back to Lightning, giving her a reassuring hug.

"I will, Light. Don't worry, everything will be fine—I'll only be gone for a second, and I'll return with the others. We've been really worried about you."


I almost fly down the stairs, my heart pounding with happiness. Lightning's awake! She's awake, and she seems fine—despite her confusion, I'm sure she would regain her memories soon. The only thing that worries me is her left eye… why does it seem like it hurts? Why won't she open her eye?

The only person whom I know may be able to help is Vanille.

Barging into the living room, I almost burst into tears as I shout.

"Guys, Lightning's… awake!"


Damn this…

Lightning sits stiffly on the bed, her hand pressing against her left eye tightly again. Now that she's calmed down… she begins to make sense of the situation. Even her memories of the battle are returning, despite slowly.

If what Serah said is true, then that would mean Barthandelus is no more. Her last memory of him was… seeing Fafnir burning him down… and his eyes—they were glaring at her…

But then a vivid image of Barthandelus bursting into a thousand crystal shards appears in her mind, convincing her that it isn't just a dream. Slowly her scowl lessens—she can even remember seeing Fafnir's blade turning transparent, an indication that no more fal'Cie was around…

Barthandelus is really dead.

She should be feeling more victorious—he was her nemesis after all, the one who has nearly succeeded to kill her so many times. Now that he's no more, she should be feeling relieved… so why is it that she still feels anxious? Like something is amiss…

And that's when Lightning remembers what happened before Fafnir's flames engulfed Barthandelus. Inhaling a sharp intake of breath, Lightning drops her hand from her left eye. She has thought her left eye is hurting so much because of some injury she's sustained… but now that she thinks about it…

It should be her right eye she worries about more.

Gingerly, the soldier rises her hand towards her right eye. She has to make sure for herself… no matter how much she wishes that incident was just a dream, she must still make sure for herself…

Her fingers graze against cold crystal.

Lightning drops her hand, defeated. No wonder she still feels anxious… for Barthandelus's last attack has stayed with her.


"LIGHTNING!"

That sudden boom of voices startles her—Lightning's left eye snaps open, only to close again in pain. She hasn't managed to see anything in that split second, but her sharp ears can still recognize those voices.

"Lightning, Light, oh thank Etro you're awake!"

Vanille…

"Dammit, Light, about time you wake up! Ya know how long you've been sleepin'?"

Fang.

"Light… how are you feeling? Is your eye… hurting?"

Hope.

"Glad to see you awake, Soldier Girl!"

"Whoa, it's been some time!"

Sazh… Snow.

And despite the pain throbbing in her left eye, despite the coldness of the crystals covering half her body—Lightning smiles. Her family is here—safe and sound, just as Serah said. Their long battle is finally over.

Everyone she cares about is here.


"So can you open it?"

Vanille's voice rings out, from the clarity of it Lightning would guess the redhead is bending down right in front of her to look at her eye. After all the ruckus that involved embarrassing hugs and hair-ruffling in the case of Fang, Serah has pushed everyone away from her so Vanille can check on her eye.

"I can if I want to… but it hurts…"

"How does it hurt? Like, is it burning or…?"

"It's like looking straight into the sun. Everything seems too bright…"

Vanille glances at the room, noticing the lights. Even though night has almost fallen, but the lamps in this room are indeed quite bright.

"Hope, can you dim the lights a little…? Thanks," Vanille nods at the boy, who seems so worried for Light that he immediately jumps into action even before Vanille finished her sentence.

"Try opening your eyes now... Is it any better?" the redhead turns back to Lightning, watching the soldier's left eye closely.

"…"

Lightning opens her left eye for a few seconds—but then she quickly shuts it closed again.

"Not really… it still hurts, although I managed to see some blurry shapes and colours…"

"Well…" Vanille tilts her head, musing. She has seen Lightning's eye when she opened it just now—it seems fine. Clear, intense blue with no sign of dullness. The redhead glances at Lightning's crystal eye. The only explanation she can think of is that Lightning's left eye is merely suffering the side effect of having the right eye crystallized. It should get better overtime, though. The problem now is how to explain that to Lightning…

Vanille glances back at Serah, mouthing, "Does she know?" while pointing at her right eye. Serah immediately gets her question—she shrugs and shakes her head.

I don't think so.

Vanille purses her lips, noticing that the others seem uncomfortable too. No one wants to tell Lightning about… the crystal.

A slight shake of the head from Sazh makes Vanille's decision. The redhead turns back to Lightning, giving the soldier's forearm a squeeze.

"Well, Light, I think your left eye has suffered some damage from... the injuries you sustained during that battle. It's just very sensitive to light now, that's why it hurts when you open your eyes. But don't worry, I'm sure it will heal overtime—I would just bandage your eyes tomorrow, so the lights won't hurt you."

She makes no mention of Lightning's right eye. But when Vanille turns to say something to the others, Lightning speaks up.

"I'm half-crystallized, am I not?"

Vanille froze. Fang exchanges a quick glance with Serah, while Hope's eyebrows rise in worry.

"Uh…"

"Don't worry… I remember what happened," Lightning says. "I remember you guys coming to save me before he managed to crystallize me fully."

At this, Lightning forces her left eye open and focus at the blurry shadows of her friends.

"Thanks."


She seems so calm about it.

Fang doesn't understand how, but Lightning doesn't seem too upset upon finding out that half her flesh has practically been frozen into crystal. Well, it's true that she can still move… but still! From what Fang vaguely recalls of her own crystalstasis, she remembers it to be kinda peaceful, yet cold and eerie at the same time… it wasn't really comfortable, especially since she remembers very little of it. Does that mean her mind somewhat got crystallized too?

Yet here Light is, answering Vanille's interrogation-style questions stoically.

"So can you see anything at all with your right eye Light? Even though it's crystallized, it seems open."

Lightning shakes her head at this. "No, I can't see anything… at all."

"Hmm… so what do you feel in your right eye, then, Light? And the other crystallized parts?"

"Nothing… sometimes they sting with sudden coldness, but most of the time I can't feel anything there."

"So it's like numb?"

Lightning falls quiet for a few seconds at this question, but she finally looks up and answers—somewhat bitterly.

"No. It's like… I can't even feel anything if someone touches it."

Fang's eyebrows shoot up. Even Vanille seems to be taken aback by this—not being able to feel any touch isn't a good sign.

"May I?" Vanille asks quietly. Lightning hesitates, but then nods.

Gently, Vanille reaches out and brushes her thumb across Lightning's crystal eye.

Nothing. No response, no reaction… no sign of her actually registering the touch. Vanille slumps back to her seat.

Sensing her withdrawal, Lightning looks down again.

"Well… it's not really a big deal," she says. "At least I can still move around without difficulty."

And despite Fang knows that Lightning is just acting stoic, the huntress can't help but giving the soldier some respect for her bravery in dealing with those darned crystal.


"Alright… so for now you should just rest, okay? We'll turn the lights off, and since night will fall soon, I think I'll only cover your eyes with bandage tomorrow morning. What do you say, Light?"

"Whatever."

Vanille laughs at this characteristic answer, giving Lightning's shoulder a squeeze as she stands up.

Meanwhile, Serah is examining Lightning's crystal eye. Now that she's awake, the crystal seems to be emitting a soft glow... It's a bit unsettling really.

"We'll let you rest now, Light," Vanille says. "Try to get some sleep; it's still early evening, so if you wake up at midnight later we can give you something to eat. Right now I believe you don't feel like seeing food at all."

She's right; even the thought of food now makes Lightning feel like throwing up. Shaking her head, the soldier throws herself back onto the bed. Her left eye no longer hurts so much anymore, now that the lights are off—but her other crystallized body parts have started acting up and throbbing with cold pain in exchange.

Sensing Lightning's weariness, Serah motions for everyone to leave the room. Hope nods in agreement, and he helps nudging the others out.

Lightning hears her friends leave, and tiredness immediately overcomes her. But just before she falls into a slumber, the soldier registers Serah's voice.

"Rest well, sis… I'll be right here when you wake up."


A hiss of pain resonates through the dark room.

Lightning wakes up with a start, a wave of cold pain sweeping throughout her body. Wincing, she lifts up her shirt to check on her crystalized waist. It still looks the same as ever—which is just that. Frozen. It doesn't seem to be throbbing or anything, but it still hurts. Lightning lets out a frustrated groan, letting her shirt fall back. That's when she noticed something.

She can see. Despite things seem kinda blurry around the edges, but she can definitely see them without cringing in pain.

Upon this realization, Lightning turns her head around to look at the window. Night is reigning; the only source of light is the small stream of moonlight flowing into her room. The only explanation she can think of is that this lack of bright light favours her sensitive left eye. As for her crystal eye, it still can't… see, or feel, anything.

Well, at least I can see a bit now.

A glance at the clock on her bedside table tells her that it is nearly two in the morning. She has only slept for a few hours. Lightning struggles to sit up then, scowling when she finds herself having to drag her body up. Damn this… even though her eye feels better, but the rest of her crystalized body parts are hurting so much, making it hard to move.

Yet the soldier still forces herself. With a grunt, she shifts to the edge of the bed, pushing herself to stand. A wave of dizziness hits her immediately; cursing, Lightning grabs the bedside table to steady herself. Unfortunately, her hand inadvertently knocks the clock, causing it to fall noisily to the floor.

Now that's annoying.

She waits for a few seconds for the dizziness to lessen; when it does, Lightning straightens up slowly.

With a huff, the soldier turns her gaze to the window again. Now that she's standing, she can see more of the scenery outside. Wisps of clouds are currently passing the moon, obscuring its light and covering the room in shadows. Shrugging, Lightning turns around to face the mirror hanging on the wall opposite her. She feels hesitant at first, but decides that she just has to see it for herself.

In a few careful steps, Lightning reaches the mirror. She looks down, frowning slightly. When the moon reclaims its full shine and floods the room with dim silver light, the soldier huffs and looks up determinedly at her reflection in the mirror.

An unfamiliar face gazes back at her, taking Lightning a few seconds to recognize it as her own. The jagged, pale blue crystal has covered about a quarter of her face, shimmering indifferently under the moonlight as if it has always belonged there. The crystal has frozen her right eye into a permanent blank gaze, looking perpetually forward without seeing. Even Lightning herself was slightly taken aback by that empty glare which reminds her too much of… Barthandelus.

Shaking her head in annoyance, Lightning looks away from the mirror. Barthandelus is dead now; no matter what his last attack leaves her with, he isn't here to take advantage of it anymore. Her only problem is merely to get used to the crystal etched into her body. She really wished the cold stabbing pain accompanying the crystal would disappear, though…

"Lightning?"

Lightning turns around right when the door creaks open. That familiar pink-haired head pokes in—Serah. Lightning notices that her sister still has her hair in her usual side-ponytail, making her wonder if Serah has slept at all.

"Light, are you okay? I think I heard something fall… oh."

Serah seems to have adjusted to the dim lighting in the room. She looks surprised to see Lightning up and standing, and the older Farron just shrugs. She gestures at the clock on the floor.

"Sorry, I accidentally knocked it over. It's nothing, Serah."


When I saw her standing, I felt surprised initially—but then I felt relieved, for Lightning seems alright. She is standing without support, not even wobbly at the slightest. I smile at her, but I don't think she can see me in this dim light. Besides, it's probably this poor lighting that allows her left eye to see, after all. I can see her left eye open, and Light doesn't show any sign of it hurting as much as before.

"Go back to sleep, Serah, I'm fine. On that note, did you even sleep at all?"

Of course, I think in slight amusement. She always knows.

"How about you, Light? Shouldn't you go back to sleep too?" I ask her back.

"I can't sleep."

I fall quiet at this, watching Lightning walk carefully back to her bed and sit down at the edge. She gazes out of the window, seemingly lost in thoughts.

Well, if she can't sleep… then maybe I can talk to her…? I've been waiting to have some quiet time to talk to her, for I have some things I really need to tell her. But is it appropriate now, right after she wakes up…?

However, I figure that in the morning everyone will be fussing over Light and I won't be able to talk to her in private. Besides, I can't take it anymore… I have to apologize to her. I make my decision and step into the room.

"Hey, Light… can I talk to you for a while?"

Lightning looks up immediately at this, her eye questioning.

"Sure."


It feels comforting, sitting next to Lightning. She has this aura that makes me feel so… safe. And that's what she has always done. She's always… saved me.

I look down at my hands, clean and smooth under the gentle moonlight. But a different image dances at the back of my mind; the memory of these same hands, trembling and covered with blood… Lightning's blood.

I shut my eyes closed almost out of reflex. No matter what, that memory still haunts me, terrifying me with its vividness. But still, there is nothing I can do to erase it. I did do those things… I did stab my own sister.

"Serah? Hey, are you okay? You look kinda… pale," Lightning's voice takes me out of my reverie.

I look up at her face, my eyes meeting her mismatched eyes. Under the moonlight, her crystal eye glints slightly. Despite its emptiness, though, her left eye still shines as usual—warm and concerned. Upon seeing it, I decide to just let it out.

"Light… do you—do you remember… what happened in that plains near Palumpolum, right before you chased after Barthandelus into Pulse?" I ask quietly.

Something flickers in Lightning's blue eye, but it vanishes almost immediately. She looks at me intently, before answering.

"…Yes."

"Can we… talk about what happened there?" I ask again hesitantly.

"Only if you want to," Lightning replies immediately, a slight shadow of worry casting her face. I know she's worried about me—something I really don't deserve.

Without giving myself a chance to back out, I let the words flood out of my mouth, words I've been longing to say ever since Lightning left me on those plains.

"I'm—I'm so sorry about what happened! I really am, Light, I don't know how I could possibly do it—I stabbed you, for Etro's sake. You told me to stay with Vanille and help her heal the others, but when I saw that crazy attack of Barthandelus's exploding in the distance… I couldn't just stay put, and I went chasing after you. I thought I could help—but before I found you, Barthandelus found me first. He attacked me—then I couldn't remember anything else. When I regained my consciousness I was at those plains with you—stabbing you."

My voice trembles, but I force it to continue despite the crushing feeling of guilt and shame that was threatening to overwhelm me.

"I should've—at least tried resisting Barthandelus's control—but no, I succumbed immediately to his power and did whatever he made me do. Fang was right—my resolve, my strength, is really weak. I should've tried to resist following his commands, but I didn't. It was—it was my fault you got—"

But a none-too-gently pinch on the cheek stopped me right there, drawing a protesting squeal from me.

"Ouch, Light! What—"

"…You talk too much, little one," Lightning answers immediately, smiling slightly at me. "Of things that were never your fault."

"But I—"

"Nope, now it's my turn to talk. You've exhausted your chance when you started talking about things that weren't true," she cuts me mid-protest.

I look at her in mild surprise. "What do you mean…?"

Lightning huffs as if my question has an obvious glaring answer.

"Didn't I tell you this before? It was never yourfault Serah," she says sternly. "It was Barthandelus. His power was undeniable—even I struggled so much to keep up with him in that battle, to even stay alive for another few seconds. No one can expect to overcome his power easily, for he is a formidable fal'Cie. That's a given—that's why, I find it ridiculous that you blame yourself for not being able to resist his control. I mean, imagine if it was someone else—someone who isn't as strong as you are. He might've died or gone insane immediately when Barthandelus took control of his mind."

I stare at her incredulously. "How can you call me strong? I failed to—"

"Really, now?" Lightning cuts me again. "You regained control of your mind after you stabbed me, right? Had you not succeeded to do that, I might've died right there. I doubt anyone can break free from Barthandelus's control like that, even after he fled the area. So yeah—that's proof enough of your strength, Serah. Besides," Light adds, pausing with a smug look in her eye. "…You are my sister, after all, so of course you were strong enough to overcome that damned fal'Cie's control."

At this unexpected smugness, I was speechless for a second, before an unintended laughter escapes my lips. It was the first genuine laugh I ever had since we returned from Pulse. Lightning looks satisfied upon hearing it—she ruffles my hair with a smirk.

"See now? Your strength was what saved me. Barthandelustried to useyou to do his dirty work, but you stopped him before he succeeded. I'm alive now, am I not?" Lightning smiles gently. "Thanks to you and your Eidolon. Which you, on that note, tamed on your own without help."

I grow quiet, watching her still with hesitation. She can't be—not blaming me at all? I did manage to overcome Barthandelus's control at the end, and summoned Phoenix to heal her—but still, that wound I caused her must have hurt like hell—

"C'mon now, little sis. Make this easy for me—talking has never been my forte," Lightning says, a hint of annoyance in her voice. "I know your habit of overthinking things cannot be healed overnight, so I just have to spell it out for you: whatever happened back there, it wasn't your fault. I know you never want to hurt me, and that's enough." At this, Lightning narrows her eyes. "After all, you know I can't stay mad at you for too long."

I can't help but smile at that. I wanted to say something, but right then the dam that has been holding my tears decide to give up. A stream of tears flows down my face, falling on my hands. Upon seeing Lightning's oh-damn-she's-crying-what-did-I-say-wrong face, however, an awkward giggle escapes my quivering lips. I push her shoulder playfully.

"I'm not crying because you said anything wrong, Light, calm down. Quite the contrary… I'm—" A sob racks me then, but I swallow it resolutely. "…Relieved. And… grateful."

Lightning huffs, pushing me back. "I should be grateful to you. You saved my life back there."

"Not as many times as you did for me."

"This conversation is getting repetitive." Lightning rolls her eyes.

I laugh, wiping my tears away. "Sorry."

"And one more thing."

"Hmm?"

"I just want you to know that… I'm proud of you, Serah. You've grown up so much from that little girl who kept running to me crying whenever she did something wrong. You can get things right yourself now… without any help. So yeah—I sure as hell am proud of you, little sis."

My tear dam almost gave way again at this, but I willed it to hold. Breaking into a wide grin, I lunge forward to hug Lightning, ignoring her surprised grunt.

"And I'm so glad I have you to teach me how to live, Light. You're the best sister, ever."

"Uh… thanks. I guess you are, too."

I laugh again upon hearing her awkward reply. Light has never been good in expressing her feelings in words, after all. So I just hug her tightly, and we keep still—just being together, enjoying each other's company without having to fear for our lives anymore.


Things go smoothly the next morning. Vanille has just succeeded in forcing Light to eat some food, and now she is asking Snow to fetch some bandage for her to bind Lightning's eyes. Meanwhile, Hope and I are drawing the curtains close, as Lightning's left eye has started to hurt again the moment the sun shines brightly into the room. Sazh has also helpfully dimmed the lights in the room, while Fang just watches with a thoughtful expression as Lightning tries to open her eye a little.

A few seconds later, Snow stomps back, a roll of fresh bandage in his hand.

"Here ya go, Light—!" he says cheerily, and throws the bandage to Lightning.

Everyone stares at the soaring bandage in horror— even Snow immediately notices his folly as he stares wide-eyed at the bandage he just threw without thinking. Vanille lashes her arm out, trying to catch it; but it was out of her reach.

Yet when everyone expects the bandage to hit its mark, Lightning suddenly moves, extending her hand towards the bandage—

—which immediately stops in mid-air. A gentle greenish glow surrounds it, which almost everyone recognizes immediately.

A Stop spell.

"Whoa. Someone can still use her magic pretty well, huh?" Sazh comments in awe. Hope quickly dashes to the bandage and retrieves it so as to avoid any other stupid incidents.

"What do you mean 'still'?" Lightning asks, looking confused.

"Most of us have lost our magic abilities, Light," Hope explains, handing the bandage to Vanille. "Only Fang and Vanille can still use some magic, but not very strong ones. Honestly, even they can't muster a Stop spell now."

"Geez, thanks for the reminder," Fang whispers sarcastically, folding her arms as she leans against the wall in slight annoyance.

Meanwhile, Lightning falls quiet, contemplating this new information. She can still feel her magic buzzing as strongly as usual… does it mean her abilities have not waned? Does it have something to do with her being half-crystallised as a l'Cie?

Then her thoughts get cut off by Vanille, who begins to wrap the bandages around her eyes. As darkness surrounds her, the pain in her eye lessens.

"Better?" Vanille asks as she leans back, observing her handiwork. She has tied two layers of bandage over Lightning's eyes neatly, ensuring that they are not too tight or loose.

"Um… Yeah."

"Not too tight? Or loose?"

"Nope."

"Good," Vanille says, grinning. She straightens up and turns to the rest of us.

"Alright, then. Now everyone get out—let's allow Light some rest." Vanille declares, gesturing at the door. She then turns to Lightning again, giving her arm a light pat. "The pain should disappear with time and rest, Light, don't worry. Technically, your body is uninjured; so you should get better soon."

"I hope so… thanks," Lightning replies almost absent-mindedly.

Vanille smiles despite knowing Lightning can't see it, before ushering everyone out. Fang pushes herself off the wall, sending Lightning a last glance. The soldier is sitting stiffly on the bed, her head bowed, the strip of bandage covering her eyes. Shrugging, Fang follows the others out of the room.

Only when she hears the door slams shut does Lightning let a grimace appears on her face, as she presses a hand against her crystalized waist.


A/N: It's been really a while since the last update, right? I guess... about 6 months? ._. I'm really sorry for that. I know it doesn't feel good to be following a story and it suddenly goes into hiatus right before the conclusions. Frustating, to say the least. So yeah—for this, I truly apologize. I dont think anyone would be very interested on the reason behind the hiatus, so I'll just say that life in Junior College hasn't been easy for me. Studies are... hellish, to say the least. I've been studying like crazy this whole year, but now I can safely say that I will be promoted to JC2 next year. So yeah... at least all those studying pays off. Anyway, school holidays started at the end of November, so I've immediately jumped back into writing this fic. Here is the new chapter, finally. Again, I'm sorry for the long wait. But dont worry, I'll do my best during this holiday to finish up the last few chapters of this fic :)

And then... I do owe some words to some people.

lightning1997: Hi again~ i just have to say that I'm really sorry for making you and everyone else wait so long for this update. I know you've been writing some reviews asking me when I would update; I did read them, and I really wanted to give you some explanation about my hectic college life and some info about the update. Trouble was, I couldnt send you a PM since you dont have fanfiction account ^^" I felt really guilty over this, trust me. At least now I can personally apologize to you, and just hope this update redeems the long hiatus ^^" On a lighter note, I also wanted to thank you for your support even when I was on hiatus. Much thanks for that :,3

fadedSorrow: Hey, hi :D I really want to thank you for all the reviews. I truly appreciate all of em, and honestly they've made my day brighter whenever i read them :,) They are really awesome mood-boosters whenever I'm having an exhausting day at school. I'm glad you've enjoyed the story so far, and I just hope you enjoy this long overdue update as well :,)

quynhessence: Now you're the one I've been wanting to talk to so badly over the last few weeks of school xD First things first, I really want to thank you for everything you've written in your review. You've made me feel so flattered and… happy. Yeah :,) Thanks a lot, I truly appreciate your kind words and intention. Especially the fact that you took your time to write me such an elaborate, thought-provoking review :,3

So now, I'd love to address the issues and questions you raised in the review. No worries, I don't feel offended at all. The points you raised are indeed valid and reasonable, and I appreciate that. In fact, I gotta admit that I enjoy this opportunity to explain my viewpoint and reasoning :P I've put a lot of thoughts behind certain things I write in the fic, but of course I cannot include them in the story. So it feels good to have someone enquiring, cos I can finally explain things properly xP I have to admit that my reasoning for doing certain things isn't always logical or morally-right, but I'll still disclose em. You've been very honest and detailed in explaining your viewpoint to me, so I believe it is only fair that I give you nothing less than that :) Beware though, my next sequence of explanations might get a tad long and… elaborate :P

So yeah, the first issue I'll address is the one about Snow. I admit that I do tend to push him away in the fic, and that it makes his presence seem useless. In the game, the reason for his presence in the story is clearly because of his love for Serah, as you aptly pointed out. But I believe that is not his only reason for wanting to protect Cocoon. I think he does care for Cocoon itself in the first place. I'm sure you know that scene at Palumpolum where Snow confronted Yaag Rosch? This was what he said to Rosch: "Cocoon is our home. How can we even think about destroying it?" From that scene, I drew the conclusion that Snow does care for Cocoon. He won't sit still while Barthandelus is threatening to destroy his home. Especially with his heroic antics and tendency to try to save everyone, like what he displayed when he and team NORA tried to free the Cocoon citizens during the Purge. And that's why I still include him along with the others in their quest to save Cocoon in the fic.

But I have to admit: it was actually possible for me to also include the relationship between Snow and Serah in the fic, to make it more realistic and closer to the in-game story. It's just that… I didn't try hard enough to do it ._.

You see, I have to say again that I don't like Snow. That is why I don't spend time getting to know him... I know very little of his motives, feelings and reasoning. This is so much different from what I did for the other characters, especially Lightning, Fang and Vanille. I spent countless hours replaying scenes from the game, trying to understand their motives and feelings in everything they do. That is why I can develop their characterization well enough in the fic. But… not Snow. I don't know him well enough. So I cannot pull it off, integrating him into the story smoothly while keeping the dynamic between him and Serah realistic. And another reason is… well, I can say I understand quite a bit about sisterly love, since I have a younger sister myself. But I definitely can't say the same regarding… love, as in the kind couples share. I've always been more of a family person—with all due respect, I just have to admit that up till now, I still can't really understand the dynamic of love between boyfriend/girlfriend. Ok that may make me sound like some melancholic nerd, but that's the truth ^^" I just didn't want to write about something I barely understand. So yeah… these are why I omitted SnowxSerah relationship in the fic.

Alright, now moving on to the second issue on Serah being OOC. You said Serah in my fic seems too overly attached and dependent of Lightning and a bit too immature for her character in the game. Again, you're right :) I am aware of it, it's just that I choose to ignore it due to some… selfish… reasons. Ok I'll just be very honest here. I'm biased. I love Lightning way more than Serah. Coupled with the fact that I don't really like Serah for seeming to care more about Snow than Light in the game, it results in me portraying Serah as somewhat… inferior. Might sound childish, altering the original to satisfy my own taste—but yeah, that's what I did. I do try my best to keep her in character, but I guess the way I portray her as someone inferior defeats the effort. My own portrayal of her often wins, and I can't help it. I do try to redeem this by keeping the other characters as how they are portrayed in the game, though. ^^" So I can't say much about this, nor will I give any excuses. It's just… something selfish I did.

And you also raised your viewpoint about how Serah's attitude to Lightning's reckless attitude should have been. You said you'd like to see her accepting Lightning's selflessness in a kind of quiet, intimate, I-worry-about-you-risking-your-life-for-me-but-I-love-you-for-it kind of way. I must say that I agree :) I do see it that way, it's just that I think my portrayal of it differs from what you expected. Well, as they say, people have their own ways of seeing things :P So yeah, I'll elaborate on this. Unlike my selfish reasoning before, I do have two neutral opinions/interpretations of love which result in this current portrayal of Serah's attitude towards Light.

Firstly, I always believe that when we love someone, we would want that person to be safe. We wouldn't want anything bad to happen to that person. That's why we spend so much time worrying about the people we love. And when we're worried about someone, I think we would tend to say something. It can be as short as "be careful," or it can even be an elaborate lecture about staying safe and making wise choices. So yeah… this is what I am thinking when I portray how Serah accepts Lightning's reckless and selfless attitude. She does love Lightning for it and would never want her to change. But I believe this attitude of Lightning would also make Serah keep worrying for her safety. I just think Serah wouldn't let Light go jumping into danger without saying anything. And that's where all the scolding and warning you see in the fic stems from ^^"

Secondly, I also believe that scolding someone is actually proof that we care for them. I think this belief stems from what my mum told me before: "If I scold you, it means I still care about you."
It's true, really. Scolding someone is actually tiring. But if we love someone and we see them doing something reckless that endangers themselves, I believe we would scold them; telling them to be more careful in preserving their life. Simply because we love them, we are worried for them and we want them to be safe, like what I mentioned in my first point. And this is why my attempt to portray how Serah loves Lightning despite her recklessness involves so much scolding ^^" I just can't imagine that Serah would keep quiet when Light risks her life, even if it is to save her. I think the absence of scolding can be scary, even. This is because I've experienced those rare times when my mum gets really exhausted and mad at me, that she would just keep quiet and tell me I can do whatever I want. No scolding, no warning. But for me, that silence is waaaay scarier than any scolding ._.

So… there. These are my reasons behind my current portrayal of Serah's attitude towards Lightning :) I'm not saying this is the most ideal way of portraying it, but at least this is how I honestly see it based on my own experiences and opinions ^^

Also, this proves that my fic is far from perfect. There are characters (mainly Snow and Serah) which I could not portray as exactly as their in-game selves due to selfish or shallow reasons. No excuses for that, but at least I've explained my honest reasons… so maybe you can understand my viewpoint, as flawed as it might be :)

Anyway, I really am glad that you like Lightning's and Fang's characterization :B These two are the ones I love most from the entire FFXIII cast, and I'm just relieved that it seems I've managed to portray their characters well enough ^^ I have to do them justice for being so awesome and inspiring, after all :P

Oh, and you're right again. English isn't my first language :P So actually when I write this fic, I see images. I imagine how the scenes would look like as one of the game's own cutscenes. And then I merely recreate the scenes I see in my mind in English :) although, admittedly some of the words I need to describe the scene sometimes come into my mind in my first language—so I have to then think of the English words for them. But mainly I find myself being able to describe the scenes immediately in English, hehe :D probably because I read a lot of English books ^^ And also because I personally think English is a beautiful language. I can express so many subtle things with precision using certain English words, words that do not even exist in my own mother tongue. I do try my best to use the exact words to describe every scene in the fic, to make it as vivid as possible. Maybe that's why my sentences can be beautiful, as you kindly said ^^

So yeah, I guess that's all I have to say. Again, thank you so much for the review. I really enjoy replying it :3 I just hope my explanation makes sense, haha. They are long, now that I look at em O.o oh,and I do hope the rest of this fic holds up to your standards and liking! :P