Lily's POV
I couldn't get Astoria and Draco's expressions out of my mind. It was as thought their nightmares had come to visit. Sure, our little ones needed some help to show up healthy but complications happened and magic was a huge factor in whether they lived or not. Luckily, we were magic and our additions would be born into two of the wealthiest family's and most powerful unions the Wizarding world had ever seen. This was our miracle, our Potter/Malfoy union and would be legend.
After sitting out on the porch and talking for a bit we went in and had dinner. It was a quiet affair and as I finished off the berry and kale smoothie Scorpius quietly examined my face. He said he was going to talk to his father about their absence in our day after dinner and suggested I go speak with his mother. Scorpius and her were close but in our time as a couple Astoria and I had become friends. She confided in me and I in her. If there was something bothering her I wanted to know and help her through it. After dishes were cleaned and placed back in the cupboard Scorpius took some floo from his pocket and went to the Ministry of Magic to see if his father was working late, as he was apt to do. Knowing the woman I wanted to speak to would be home I donned my best maternity dress and stepped into our fire place and out into the main room in Malfoy Manner.
In the library Astoria huddled weeping in a corner. Her normally immaculately styled hair was strewn over her cheeks, sticking to her clammy face and her eyes were puffy and irritated. Her whole face was red and her lips quivered. She noticed me a few seconds later and without meeting my gaze, shifted and apologized that I had seen her this way. When I sat next to her and stroked her back a could have day had passed without my notice. Astoria was suffering so immensely it almost disturbed me to know something could tear her in half and leave her this exposed. Finally she spoke.
"I need to show you something but first you must promise to let me tell Scorpius on my own."
"I promise. What is bothering you Astoria?"
"I will show you."
She drew a vial from her large sleeve and summoned a pensive to us. After she dropped the liquid I dipped my head and a scene unfolded before my eyes. It started very similarly to my doctor visit this morning with two, young, excited, new parents (fresh out of their seventh year) checking up on their baby.
"Well Astoria, it looks as though we might need to have the two of you in more regularly. The vital organs are still a little undeveloped, particularly her lungs. We should keep an eye on those, just to be safe, and it looks like we might need to do a little bit of cosmetics on the toes. They are still a bit too webbed for my liking. Would you be able to come back in a week from Friday?"
"Of course, anything for our little one!"
The scene changed to another healers office and Astoria was chocking back tears while Draco looked at the floor with his sterling silver eyes unfocused and stone cold.
"What do we do Dray? Should we risk it? Do you think it's worth the chance?"
"I think it is always worth the risk, unless the risk is hurting you. I would feel more comfortable chancing it but the final choice is up to you, my sweet."
"I don't want to give up what could turn out to be a normal little girl with some slight problems. We are going through with this. It's going to be so expensive Draco."
"Darling, you are a Malfoy now. Cost is not even a consideration."
A doctor came back in at their request and they told him their decision to proceed with the pregnancy. Though he tried to hide it, the doctor looked disappointed in their choice. He went on with different procedures they would need to follow, gave Astoria a strict diet to follow, an made another appointment for next week.
Again the scene cut and Astoria and Draco ran through St. Mungo's to the delivery room. Healers chased behind them with a chair and kept trying to make Astoria use it. She ran at full speed, pushing away the thing every time it threatened to push up under her. Draco eventually used a spell to destroy the pestering chair. They were immediately taken to a private delivery room and Astoria swallowed a potion to help with the labor. It was a quick process, lasting about five hours, and a baby was rushed over to the new mom's collarbone as healers ran tests. A paler then usual looking Draco hovered protectively over his little family. The baby grunted and wiped crusties out of those pale blue eyes. Together Astoria and Draco looked at each other and started crooning a name. Selene.
Both had tears in their eyes and only looked away from the new little girl when the doctor mentioned some difficulties ahead of them.
"Her lungs are still underdeveloped and I'm afraid her bones are a bit thin. She might have issues learning to speak and a higher risk of fractures, also if things don't catch up fast she will have breathing issues in the future. For now, she is looking alright but I'd like you to stay here for a week, maybe more, so we can monitor her growth."
My vision blurred and the familiar scene of Astoria holding back tears as Draco won a staring war with the tile floor filled my eyes. Selene lay in a little lambskin robe on a table next to her worried parents. A small gasp seemed to escape her every minute or so.
"What can we do to save her? She's here and she's been so healthy these past few months. There has to be some way."
"I'm afraid, Mrs. Malfoy, that this disease is slowly eating away at her lungs. Her development was starting to improve. If Selene had caught this bug in two years, or three, her body might have been able to better equip itself and we would have more time to find a cure or charm for her. As it is I can't see her making it past three years old unless we find a cure. I am very sorry to have to be a bearer of bad news."
"Is there a group of healers trying to find a cure yet?"
"No, Mr. Malfoy. There is not enough funding. We have a small team who will be assigned to focus on it until Selene is past help or cured but they have other responsibilities as well. I wish there was more I could do."
Again my vision shift. This time Selene was held in lace draped arms as Draco locked the front door of a beautiful mansion home and turned, walking to the edge of the estate with his wife's hand in his. They apparated and Draco unlocked the door of a cottage on a cliff overlooking the ocean. The floors were dirty and the living room looked slightly cramped with the minimalistic furniture in it. He apologized for the state of the house and for the small kitchen but Astoria smiled and took a tour, looking in each of the two small rooms before glancing into the kitchen and bathroom. She deposited Selene into a crib in one of the rooms before coming back to tuck herself into Draco's chest.
"This is all the space we need right now. Perhaps the ocean air and open fields will help those little lungs and give her the perfect boost to start healing. Thank you Draco. I know your life has never lacked grandeur before."
"Anything for our little girl. I will be home after eight. Don't work too hard on the house."
I watched Astoria clean the floors, manipulate the color of the wood and polish them until they shone. All the walls were redone and the kitchen had been cleaned and magically expanded by the time Draco came home. Selene was gasping for air as Astoria rocked her in the wooden chair next to the window.
"Well Draco, did they agree?"
"St. Mungo's has given us twenty of their best healers and spell weavers to research and find a cure. If they are unable to find a cure before Selene is...beyond help they will return to their work. If we wish to continue research we will have to hire them privately. I'm sorry love, it was the best I could do."
"Draco, you've done amazingly. I couldn't imagine anything that would help more, besides time and a miracle. How much did it cost?"
"Every knut from selling our manor house and my father donated another 50,000 Galleons to help persuade them. He is willing to support us for as long as this takes. We will be alright. It will be tight, but we won't starve."
Another hospital scene unfolded before me. Astoria stroked a little platinum blonde's hair as her father preformed sparkling and bright colored charms to her delight. Between giggles she would cough and wipe a red fluid from her lips onto a white lace handkerchief as her mother checked the amount of liquid expelled. It was late and after a while Selene drifted off into a troubled sleep. I felt my heart break while Astoria stroked her frigid little hand and silent tears dripped from her cheek onto the pillow top mattress. Her first and, the Healer predicted, only child dozed on. Draco traced imaginary shapes on Astoria's back and whispered encouragement to her. As the night grew longer Selene grew colder and her cough came in very shallow and moist. Blood came with every cough and her body shook with the force of the blows. By five am it was clear she wasn't going to be holding her mother's hand much longer. Doctors frequented the room and roses and lilacs and jasmine flowers were brought into the room as well as a few dim lamps to make the space more cozy. When Selene cracked opened her eyes and softly whispered, "Juice, juice please." A healer left and Astoria and Draco were alone with their two and a half year old daughter for the last time. She smiled between coughs and kept saying she loved them and telling them not to be sad and promising Scorpius was coming. They had no idea what she was talking about but kept pouring out their love back and repeating her phrase. Scorpius is coming.
After sipping on her raspberry and currant juice mix Selene lay down her head and said one more, "I love you mommy. I love you daddy." before coughing quietly and exhaling one last time with a smile on her face. Draco stood and went to get the doctors after kissing his little girls forehead. Once he was gone, Astoria lifted her head, hair streamed in front of her face and hot, angry tears dripped down her high cheekbones.
"You were my best three years."
Astoria sat on a couch facing the ocean and Draco slowly walked up to her, letting the door of their tiny and now dark feeling house slam shut behind him. Next to her a copy of the Daily Prophet sat with a pale eyed girl sweetly smiling on the front. The headline read: Selene Narcissa Malfoy passes away at age two from rare lung virus: Family and Friends welcomed at a service in her honor. Part of the paper was torn, nearly in half and was crinkled as though the women next to it had tried to destroy it.
"I would give anything to have her back. I don't know if it has even hit me that she is really gone. All I want is my child back; my healthy child back. I feel angry and let down by a lot of people; but mainly by healers and the nurses of the world who tried their hardest but couldn't save her. I have learned the hardest way how cruel life can be. Watching my child die was the most horrific experience of my life and nobody should have to go through that; especially in this day and age. The brightest star in the sky shines for her, Selene."
Draco looked at some of the well-wishers words. Things like: "In a better place", "Bigger plans for her", and "Home in heaven" stuck out at him and bile rose in his throat. She belonged here, with them.
"I will never come to peace with any of those sayings, they did not struggle through this. They have no right to say those things. You can't make sense out of nonsense and that is exactly what all of this is. Complete and total nonsense. This will never make sense to me. I know our family did not deserve any of this pain; especially not my sweet little girl, Selene. Goodnight to my sweetest girl. I love you to the moon and back."
Astoria looked right at the place I stood, as if knowing someone would view this tragedy years later and stand rooted to this spot. My head began to slip out of the pensive and the moment my face left the slender bowl I fell to the ground and wiped tears from my eyes before clutching my belly. I slowly looked up to the older, more tired, looking Astoria in front of me. She cried along with me now.
"Scorpius doesn't know?"
"If you are here and he went to Draco he might know. He will want to see this memory as well and it is about time we go back and visit her grave, as a family. I haven't seen her tomb since Scorpius was born. Draco went back the day before we moved. I have been too afraid and too superstitious to take Scorpius there. He was born a little ill as well, did you know? As a three year old he was finally up to where he should be and when our family healer asked how he got through it he looked at him and whispered, "Selene". We had never mentioned her to him and I'm sure he doesn't remember her name now. She knew of him so I guess it only made sense he knew of her as well. It's a mystery that has never been solved. Come on let's get some tea; you are supposed to keep stress low, and wait for Scorpius.. I'm sure he will need you more than ever these next few days. He has some baggage to deal with.
Scorpius POV
I walked into my fathers office to find him clutching his face as Harry held him in a brotherly embrace. This was obviously something to do with our doctors visit earlier in the day. They had not noticed my quiet shuffle into the office nor did the notice as my breathe caught as the sight sunk into my eyes and my heart skipped a beat. I had never seen my father so vulnerable, nor so close to any other man. Time really could heal all wounds. (Or so I thought at the moment.) It took another moment before my father's clear, agonized, blue eyes met the green ones staring down at him and took notice of my shadow on the hardwood floor below him.
"Scorpius, I am sorry we had to leave early. I couldn't let you see me this way, see your mother this way. Apparently running did no good. I assume Lily is at the manor?"
"That would be an accurate assumption. What is going on? You left so fast with a poor explanation. We were supposed to catch lunch together then go shopping for nursery decorations. Then I find you here struggling to stand in your office with Harry, who is obviously in on the secret, instead."
Little did I know the entire Wizarding world was in on this one. He pulled the drawer in his desk open and removed a flat piece of wood concealing a shallow compartment underneath it. From this small place he pulled moving pictures, the top one of a blonde little girl standing with her equally blonde parents in front of the ocean's azure blue waves. A small sad smile was easily seen on my younger, but more tired looking, mothers face. My father looked a bit melancholy as well but hid it better than my mother. This little girl was all smiles and kept looking from parent to parent and giggling. Written in fine cursive on the bottom was a name. Selene. It took me a moment to realize how this could even be applicable right now. It was the precise shade of the little girl's eyes that gave her away. Blue. Clear. Cool. Precise. Malfoy blue.
"Is she rela..."
"Related. I'm sorry we didn't tell you earlier. Every time the opportunity arose we came up with a reason not to tell you. You were too young. You were too stressed. You were too happy. You were never home. You would be angry with us. You were talking about kids of your own one day. You were about to have a child of your own... All these lousy excuses. Now nothing seems clearer. We should have told you long ago, when you were young, when you could accept it and not weep over the loss.
"We went to the doctor's and proudly heard our little girls heart. The doctors told us to come in for regular check ups because her lungs seemed a bit underdeveloped. She was born underdeveloped. She almost made it to a normal level but she caught a virus that ate away at her still lacking lungs. She died underdeveloped almost three years old. She was our everything and our only miracle, that is, until you came along. We were paranoid and had your development watched extremely carefully. Your first visit showed all organs were developing correctly. Everything was good. All visits from there, I think we had nearly thirty, were up from there. You were born a bit behind too but caught up."
I sat. All my life I had wanted a sibling of my own. I was extremely jealous of anyone who had a sibling, more so if they had some to spare. I hated anyone who didn't talk nicely about or protect their siblings. Maybe that was why I loved Albus so much. Lily was his everything. She was his everything as much as she was my everything now. Suddenly I felt that sick warmth in my stomach and reached for the trash can, which was handed to me by a similarly ill looking Harry Potter. I had a sister. Selene. My only sibling, my chance at the only thing I really wanted, had died before I was around, before I had been able to conceive what it was I so desperately longed for.
My fingers traced the small face who seemed to stop and stare at me the moment I reached shakily for her. Her smile was infectious and my own face returned her constant happy expression, only for a brief second. Selene. My father stood behind me and shifted his eyes from my face to the angel on the paper below us. He must have seen my anger swell and pass as the acceptance of the terrible event swept over me. I noticed for the first time the clothes this little girl wore. Little corduroy overalls in a dark eggplant shade over a billowy sleeved shirt. I reached in my pocket and pulled out the picture of my mother and I taken shortly after my second birthday. I wore small corduroy overalls over a white shirt. Our faces look so similar and in my overalls...Those overalls were hers first. We had never met but my childhood had been influenced heavily by her, down to where I lived and what I wore. I fell in love with the picture more the longer I looked at it.
Selene was the reason I was an only child. Who would want to risk another childhood death after getting a healthy child on the second attempt? (Especially when the first must have been so painful.) She was the reason I was so cherished, so well cared for, so protected, so loved. I looked at the next picture, she lay in my old crib, no, her old crib. Another picture later she was playing on a rocking horse that I had loved as a toddler. She was wrapped in the same green and silver blanket and sleeping on the same couch I drifted into sleep on so many years ago. She had left her things, the only things she would ever get for me. Thankfully, I saw very little comparisons in the last picture, other than the distinct Malfoy look of it all. She wore a green velvet dress (something I had never worn!) and snuggled a white teddy bear as big as she was. I knew that bear. It was the one that sat in my parents room, the one I wasn't allowed to play with. It was hers and hers alone. Selene.
"I have to go to Lily. I'm sure she knows by now and will be needing some reassurance."
Both men nodded in my direction and my father spoke out and caused me to stop, trying to keep my emotions in check.
"Scorpius, you are our miracle and we love you, to the moon and back."
My mother used to use that line on me. She had stopped doing it once I was about seven and asked why. It must have been Selene's line first. I smiled and sent a nod in his direction before stepping out of the fireplace to find Lily holding my mother, both ladies held tears in their knowing eyes and tea cups in their hands.
"Selene."
Lily looked taken aback as I helped her up and quickly apparated to a tiny house on a tall cliff. We had lived there until I was three. When my mother had a bout of depression my father had moved us onto the lot where Malfoy Manor was now built. Now the shack of a dwelling place stood erect and worn by the ocean wind.
There was a beautiful forest down the garden path. I had always been told not to wander in there because it was easy to get lost. Knowing this now only confirmed my knowledge. Selene's gravesite was through those woods. As Lily and I walked down the damp mossy trail and into the old trees a break in the formation caught my attention. Trees with little white flowers trailed off another road and the longer I followed the denser they grew. Soon they abruptly ended and circled behind a white marble tomb with ocean blue stones inlay.
Tears dripped down my cheekbones while my hand traced the curves of the small carving on the top. A young girl, about three, stood smiling and holding a stem of lilacs as her fingers teased one of the tiny blossoms. Here she was, her secret out at last, my only sibling. My father's firstborn. She was my mother's everything. She was the one I had always wanted.
"Hello Selene. I've missed you."
"Scorpius, I think I like the name Aries Selene Malfoy more than any of the others we've talked about so far."
"Aries Selene. It's perfect."
What a perfect place to be buried! The trees were constantly shimmering as the ocean's breeze tousled them, air was fresh and constantly shifting with the wind, grass smelled sweet and lively, and vines with tiny buds had begun to grow up and on to the tomb. Selene was resting as she never had before.
I could only begin to fathom the pain my parents went through as they watched her get healthy, soar, fall, and finally decline to the point of permanent residency at St. Mungo's for her last few months. (The pain that would be mine if my story mirrored theirs.) A candle in the wind. I turned to find Lily kneeling on the floor as she cried and held her growing stomach. She was being hit with wave after wave of emotion and the hormones raging in her body obviously weren't helping. Seeing Lily so vulnerable made me ache. I knew where her mind was. Selene's lungs had been underdeveloped. Both our little ones had lungs that were behind. Our healer had seemed a bit apprehensive telling us about the lungs and jittered whenever someone moved. He, like the rest of the Wizarding world, knew of my parents struggle. Now it had befallen us. Now we were under fire.
"Scorpius, I'm sorry we didn't tell you earlier."
My parents stood and looked around the grove as my fingers stroked the white marble below me. This was their first time back since leaving and they admired their handiwork. This whole grove was obviously my father's work while all the flowers and vines had been my mothers. Together they could make the most beautiful and delicate things, including Selene, the Malfoy angel.
I was offered a pensive before my mother took my place at the tomb. She fingered the heavy marble lid as though waiting for it to lift and release a healthy little blonde into her waiting arms. My head dipped in to the silver liquid and after seven scenes, each showing more and more saddening things, I pulled my head up from the rim of the shallow bowl. Lily had seen all of this and saw our future going the same direction. I wouldn't allow it. Our little twins wouldn't die. Lily wouldn't suffer the way my parents had. We would not loose them to the same fate as Selene. Determination and cunning was a family trait.
"Father, could Lily and I move back in to my side of the manor. I'm following your path."
Lily gave me a nod of approval as did my mother before my father slowly nodded and whispered, "Of course. Anything for you." A final brush of fingers over soft stone later I was hugging Lily close to me. With my parents in tow we went home to Safe Haven and began sending everything to Malfoy Manor. First our bedroom was empty, then the dining hall, the study, the ballroom, the bathrooms, the kitchen, and finally the nursery. My father had been able to catch up and buy another manor house and so could I. This was not home; home was with Lily and the two she carried.
Our things were taken inside and my mother and Lily hurried to put the West Wing together again. It had become an art gallery since I moved out. Our favorite works of art were left but the rest moved to the East wing to please guests who stayed here. My father immediately called a real estate agent and planned to have Safe Haven on the market by tomorrow. As he called them I looked up the floo to the hospital's main Healer, O'Riley. He happened to be the healer who told my parents the bad news. He had been through many promotions since them but he couldn't have forgotten the misery of telling people their children wouldn't make it.
As I stepped out of the floo O'Riley couldn't have been more shocked.
"Mr. Malfoy! What a pleasant surprise. To what do I owe the honor?"
"I've recently learned about my sister's demise and refuse to allow a cure to go undiscovered. You gathered the best healers for my sister. I'd expect nothing less for my twins. I can pay as handsomely as my father did and perhaps a bit more. Regardless, your cooperation and list of top healers will be required."
"Pardon me, Mr. Malfoy, but I am not willing to allow my healers to stop their current projects to aid in yours. Your family is not the only one in need. You are not my top priority. We have records and portfolios to put together and it is the middle of reporting season."
"My apologies sir, I thought your job was about research, bettering the Wizarding world, and saving lives. Does the public know your stance on life-saving? I'll leave you to your paperwork and find my own healers."
With my snide comment and poorly hidden threat of exposure still lingering in the air I went about my research. I tracked down the healers who had helped with Selene and sent letters pleading for their help at the first available moment. Next I found the newest top minds and highest potential healers. A message would be sent back to O'Riley, but at a later date. First an army of medical professionals was needed. Knowing all their responses would swamp me soon I returned to Malfoy Manor and admired Lily's decorating skills in the West Wing. She had a way of brightening up and modernizing every space while still keeping a classy edge to it all. Only one thing was missing from the wing, Lily herself.
After a few minutes of panicked searching I glanced out the window and saw my red-haired lady sitting on her horse and she grazed and walked around. Lily wore one of her more regal gowns and her horse wore nothing more than a light saddle and some leading reins. Pale fingers teased the fabric around the rounder stomach as her careful eyes watched the grass and fire hair dance in the wind. She might not have been as graceful as usual during her pregnancy but her regal poise remained as did her cunning posture. Had she seen me through the windows? Did she know I was back. My whole world seemed to revolve around Lily, whose world was now centered around two little forms just coming into existence. She had never revolved her life around having me, something I was grateful for. She had her own life and her own ambitions to keep it going. This was the exception. These babies had already snatched our hearts and now pulled at them often. They our world already. Both of ours.
