Disclaimer: Okay, I sorta lied about putting the story on hold. Also, I own nothing.
Note: I know that with the last chapter, I put this story on a small hiatus. I tried to write chapter 4 of my Chris torture story, but it still didn't take off. So now I've decided to man up and give you a 55th chapter. With the halfway mark approaching, things will get dramatic quickly. The poll will be updated, and I might or might not add this fic to the recommended fanfiction section on TV Tropes. Also, as of April 15, I am officially 17!
Contest: In order to boost reader interest and story ideas, I will propose a contest. The first person to review this chapter will receive a TDI one shot of their choice written by me. The only rules are no yaoi, no yuri, and please keep it T rated or lower. You can decline the offer if you want but I hope it will be an extra incentive to review.
Rating Note: The whole episode in general is rated T+. Let's just leave it at that.
Chapter 13 Part 1 - Getting Back Into The Groove
On TV
Chris sniffed Amy's hair.
Real Life
Chris, Chef, Izzy, Kai, Zed, Anna, and some random interns all took a shot of wine.
(Cruelfessional - In The Place Of The Extinct Recap)
Chris McLean - So I decided to cook up this game where we watch Total Drama Action and drink everytime someone does something perverted. Surprisingly enough, most of the crew joined in. This is going to be awesome!
"Woohoo!" Zed cheered in a drunken stupor, "I'm so (CENSORED!) stoned!"
"Did you see that?" Chef cried after throwing up, "A unicorn just flew over the sky!"
"Oh Zekey..." Izzy swooned, using the home schooled teen's shoulders to keep herself up, "I'm going to suck your (DOUBLE CENSORED!) dry, love!" Ezekiel blanched and whimpered.
"Everyone's gone insane, haven't they?" Josephine said to Jed. They were calmly sitting on the couch as they watched the wasted buffoons take part in their antics.
"Some more than others." Jed shuddered as he witnessed Chris and Anna heatedly make out.
"Hey Zed!" Kai yelled rather loudly, "Ten bucks says McLean and Anna go to third!"
"Too late!" Zed cried after downing his fourth shot of tequila, "I think my liver's already infected." He passed out on the floor.
(Cruelfessional - Hypocritical Aesop)
Zoey - Remember kids, this is what drinking can do to your life.
(Cut to theme song, and we're good to go!)
Veteran Camp (at night!)
As Bridgette, Lindsay, and Geoff went ahead of the group to confort a distraught Gwen, everyone else paced nervously, fearful of Duncan's wrath. When they finally arrived at the boys cabin, Duncan stomped up the stairs and glared at his three minions.
"Don't think I'm happy with how tonight went... at all." he growled menacingly before slamming the door in their faces. DJ, Heather, and Owen groaned as the rain started to fall on them.
In the girls cabin, the situation wasn't much better. Gwen lay motionlessly on her bed, obviously depressed.
"It could be worse." Bridgette assured her friend.
"Yeah!" Lindsay said hopefully, "This season could take place at a film lot where you and Trent were elected as team captains. The tension of being opponents combined with Justin's meddling would cause you two to break up. I'd still have my hair, but Bridgette would hate you!"
(Cruelfessional - How Lindsay Knew This, I Have No Idea)
Chris McLean - Too bad that home schooled twerp ruined my plans! However, I must look on the bright side. I have Amy, AKA: Little Miss Sex Kitten, on this show! (He purrs, signifying a good time to take a drink.)
"I'm alright guys." Gwen admitted, "It's only a temporary separation."
"Yeah, you just gotta go with the flow." Geoff said.
"Didn't think you would be here." Bridgette scoffed condescendingly, "Don't you have a little evil alliance to tend to?"
"About that," Geoff said nervously, "my alliance members went against me so I could be their scapegoat. By the way, sorry about flipping my lid when I saw you kissing DJ. I was just stressed out from the game."
Meanwhile, the kind hearted linebacker in question was spying through the cabin window. He was despereate to barge in and confess, but some unknown feeling prevented him from doing so.
Bridgette's eyes went open. "I didn't know what force caused me to kiss him. However, I betcha that Duncan had a very vital role in it!"
"I guess what's done is done." replied Geoff, "I almost wish I was out of the show, just so I could party and relax for once."
"Your rage was justified." the surfer girl admitted, "If I caught you kissing another girl, I'd probably knock you off your high horse."
"Actually, I want to remain single until the drama dies down." the party boy said, "I'm fine with just getting back to the friend zone though."
"And while we're at it, we might just have to get back at Duncan!" Bridgette joked.
DJ smiled as he watched the four teens laugh, knowing that he achieved the first step in redemption.
Castaway Camp (still nighttime)
The guys settled back in their cabin and welcomed their new arrival, Trent.
"Not too shabby." the guitar player said, "Guess we could have a party or two here."
"Hey Trent," Derek asked, "are you okay being separated from Gwen?"
"Derek, there are some questions you just don't ask." Harold said, "Such as 'Do you eat puppies as a hobby?' or 'Will FreshTV make a show with any moral value?'"
"And 'Will Terrry McGurrin ever write anything decent?'" the skater asked.
"Yes, that's another very valid example." Harold confirmed.
"I'm alright with it." Trent said. "I think we should hit the hay; the other guys are already asleep."
"Good night and good luck!" Derek said as they turned out the light.
The girls cabin was also ready to go to bed.
"I am happy Zoey's back in the game." Rebeccah said, already in her nightwear.
"Me too, she's so grody." Ashley replied sarcastically, "It'll be nice to wake up without the smell of ash."
"Don't even say anything!" Dana cried, "You were the one who humiliated Amy back in the Vilecano!"
"Wait, moi?" she replied haughtily, "That little diva had it coming. Shame the world has such revolting scum as her."
"Pot calling the kettle black." Leshawna muttered.
"Black girl calling Dana... uh... Whatever!" she snapped defensively, "Mark my words, Amy's going down!" She got in bed and fell asleep.
"The Rookie Raccoons were a lot nicer without her." Dana said to Leshawna.
Rookie Camp (now dawn)
The sun gave the water an orange glow as it crashed against the shore. Birds sang, and the wind gave its healing warmth to the camp. The enviroment was absolutely serene... until Chris spoke over the loudspeaker.
"Rise and shine my minions!" he laughed, "Get your butts to the center of camp for your next challenge! It's gonna be a good one!"
"That's something I didn't miss..." Zoey muttered as she exited the cabin along with Amy and Jazz.
"Hello ladies!" Emo greeted cheerfully, "Isn't it a beautiful morning?"
"He's gonna turn emo again in three, two..." Jazz quipped.
"I heard that prima donna!" the bipolar emo snapped.
At The Shore Where Everyone First Arrived
"This place brings back memories." Chris explained to the group, "Some of you have been here for the whole time, for others, not so long. What matters is that you came here, became enemies, and here we are!"
"Some of us became..." Amy said meekly before being interrupted.
"This challenge is probably my favorite of them all, past, present, and future!" the sadistic host continued, "It is a series of one on one showdowns between the three teams. Both players will start on two platforms on opposite sides of each other. Then, you will transverse monkey bars to reach a larger, center platform. There, you will attempt to strip your opponent down to their undies. Anything goes, and the first team to reach five victories wins!"
Amy's mind went blank and her face went pale. "A stripping challenge...?" she whimpered fearfully, "Oh no..."
"Why not just start on the center platform?" Derek rolled his eyes, "Seriously, the monkey bars have no point!"
"Speaking of which, where are the platforms?" Trent asked, noting the empty field of sand.
At first, Chris appeared bemused at the questions, but then he grinned wickedly. He pulled out a remote and six structures emerged from the sea: the large circular center platform the contestants would duel on, two small square platforms for the campers to start on, two sets of monkey bars to fill the gaps between the smaller and larger platforms, and a set of bleachers off to the side. A set of stairs emerged from the bleachers to the nearby coastline.
"What are you waiting for?" Chris asked, "Hop on!" The twenty two contestants followed Chris up the steps and took a seat in the bleachers.
"Not too shabby." Dana remarked, "Dead center in front of the action!"
"Hope there's a chance for the ladies to show some skin!" Duncan jibed, "Isn't that right Gwennie?" The goth girl would respond with an inappropriate gesture, but just stuck her tongue out at the delinquent.
"Not so fast hombres!" Izzy and Kai cried in unison. The redheads swung onto the bleachers on vines (God knows where they came from.) and landed on both sides of Owen.
"Hey Iz..." Owen greeted flirtatiously, "Shame you couldn't be in the challenge, so you couldn't be able to strip!"
"One: never explain your joke, Two: bite me!" Izzy replied coldly.
(Cruelfessional - OOC At It's Finest)
Owen - It's just not like Iz to be so mean! At first, I thought she was just in denial of love for me, but now, I'm starting to see complete hatred in her eyes. It's probably because that sexist jerk is corrupting her. One way or another, I will get rid of him!
Izzy - Izzy wishes Owen would stop being so possessive. Izzy appreciates the admiration, but Izzy has only one true love... (an impish grin grows on her face) and his name is...
... Ezekiel screamed as he swung wildly on the vine. Once he arrived at the challenge area, he let go and flew into Bridgette's lap.
"My Zekey!" Izzy cried as he snatched the pale white prairie boy from the confused surfer girl.
"Hold me, eh." Ezekiel whimpered weakly, grabbing onto Izzy's shirt.
"Everything's going to be alright... my darling Zeke." she replied in a motherly whisper.
"Alas, everything's not going to be okay." Chris purred sadistically as he pressed the red button on the remote. All of a sudden, all the platforms rose up a hundred feet in the air, making Ezekiel scream uncontrollably.
"Now that..." the host would continue, but Zeke's screaming didn't cease, "Now..." Chris, now fed up, pulled out a brick and threw it at Zeke's head, knocking him out.
It took the combined efforts of Kai, Owen, and DJ to stop Izzy from tearing the host limb from limb.
"Now then," Chris resumed, "The first match will be Jazz for the Rookie Raccoons versus DJ for the Veteran Vipers, because I like watching fighting nig..."
Please Stand By
"Take that you racist son of a bitch!" Izzy called out from the top of the bleachers.
Chris lay sprawled out on the beach, unmoving because Leshawna threw him from one hundred feet from the bleachers. Meanwhile, the rest of the cast stood perfectly still, stunned.
"Serves that man right." Leshawna said, dusting off her hands, "I'm pretty sure he'll be in a full body cast."
"Now that that's out of the way, Jazz, DJ, step into the battle zone!" Izzy said. She set two planks so the contestants could reach the starting platform. DJ smiled confidently while Jazz looked uneasy. Once the two reached their platforms, Izzy sounded an air horn and the battle started.
"I forefit." DJ said with a proud smile.
"Jazz wins... I guess." Izzy announced, "One point for the rookies!" The rookies and DJ cheered for the first victory. The kind hearted linebacker sat down, ignoring glares from his alliance mates.
"Let's see who we have for our next match..." Kai said while reading a list, "Ah, Fransisco for the castaways versus Geoff from the veterans!"
(Cruelfessional - Janitor's Closet Has Nothing On Us!)
DJ - (smiling proudly) Being defiant actually feels pretty good! It takes a lot off my back and... Wait, this is a female showdown day... I just screwed someone over... (stares blankly)
Amy - (fidgeting timidly, digging her foot in the ground) To be honest, I am glad Fransisco and Geoff are facing off... because... to tell you the truth... (her voice is becoming breathy and high pitched) I'm... sort of a... (squeaking) pervert! (blushing bright red)
Even though she tried to make it discrete, it was quite obvious to everyone that Amy was excited about the upcoming fight. Unbeknownst to her, Bridgette and Ashley were giggling excitedly as the two attractive men climbed across the monkey bars. Once they arrived at the center platform, they charged at each other like two leopards, because leopards are apparently erotic for girls.
Geoff threw the first punch, but Fransisco blocked it and threw the party boy to the ground. After recovering, Geoff leapt at the hispanic from behind and removed his shirt. Fransisco turned around in shock, revealing his perfectly chiseled upper body, his tan skin, his ripped core... Well, he's just sexy.
Amy crossed her legs and buried her hands in her lap. Her face grew red and she shuddered with combined nervousness and arousal.
In retaliation, Fransisco tackled Geoff and removed his shirt, rendering both men topless.
Bridgette giggled and attempted to hide her lustful blush with her hand.
Both men were rolling on the ground, their chests rubbing against each other as they groped wildly. In short, it's a yaoi fangirl's wet dream.
Amy's shuddering grew into hyperventilating as she grapsed the ends of her skirt tightly with her hands.
Geoff's pants started to slide down his body, causing Bridgette to unwittingly squeal with delight. Before he knew it, Geoff was only in his boxers, giving his opponent the win.
(Cruelfessional - Fransisco Is Not Alejandro!)
Amy - (shaking her head) I'm ashamed, letting my hormones get the best of me! Though, it was pretty... GAH! I mean, pretty shameless of me to admire them! (she groans)
Bridgette - (she swoons and lets her head fall back) That was awesome! To tell you the truth, I have a small fetish for boxers. (she blushes) Just a small one, I swear! I've forgotten how handsome Geoff is since I broke up with him. I'll just have to wait until he gets back in the swing of things...
"Good fight bro!" Geoff said after he got dressed, "Seriously, you're a tough guy!"
"Gracias, you too." Fransisco replied as he put his shirt back on.
"Next is Amy for the rookies vs Ashley for the veterans!" Izzy announced, "This is gonna be good!"
Both girls silently arrived at their platforms and looked towards each other. Both of them felt slightly dazed after watching the two boys go at it, but they were ready to fight.
"GO!" Kai yelled, and the two girls were on the monkey bars. After they got to the center platform, they slowly walked around the center of the circle, waiting for the other to strike. It had only seemed that Amy let her guard down when Ashley grabbed a hold of the brunette's shirt and ripped it off, tossing it off the edge of the circle.
"You're gonna get it!" Amy growled as she covered her pink bra with one arm. With her other arm, she grabbed Ashley's shoulder and threw her to the ground. Amy then attempted to rip off Ashley's shirt, but the movie star kicked her away.
The shy beauty groaned as she recovered from the kick. Ashley dived for Amy's skirt, but the brunette was quick to dodge her attack. Amy looked down, and saw that her skirt was sliding off her body. With a sudden blush, she pulled it up and continued.
Derek was also blushing, as Amy's pink underwear was very appealing to him.
(Cruelfessional - No Fourth Wall)
Derek - I swear to God, I am not planning on stealing Amy for myself! Just to prove it to you, my crush is...
"Man," Derek said, embarrassed that his crush was publicly revealed, "that confession was the worst idea since that time I joined that show choir..."
Flashback
"It's leg, arm, leg," the director yelled at his students, "not humerus, radius, ulna!"
"Mr. Dickenson?" Derek said raising his hand, "This is science class."
Back To The Action
Ashley threw Amy to the ground and pulled on her skirt. Amy grabbed a hold of the blue garment and tried to pull it back on. She overcame Ashley, pulled her skirt back up, and tackled her to the ground. Amy ripped the movie star's shirt down the middle, exposing her black bra.
The two bra clad girls got back up and grappled with each other. When it appeared that the battle reached a stalemate, Amy released one hand and started to pull Ashley skirt down, forcing her to do the same. They fell down to the ground again as they raced to pull each other's skirts off, but the winner was...
"Draw!" Izzy cried, "Neither of you get a point!" The two girls in their underwear groaned in disappointment. However, Amy snatched her skirt from Ashley and jumped off the platform to retrieve her shirt... which was still one hundred feet off the ground by the way.
"Oh shi..." Amy cried before hitting the water.
"Our next matchup is Emo versus Bridgette." Izzy announced.
The mocha skinned emo snarled while the blonde surfer silently nodded. They both used beams to reach their starting platforms and waited for the signal. Once Izzy sounded the airhorn, the two climed across the monkey bars and arrived at the center platform. Emo crouched down in anticipation and sent Bridgette an evil glare. The surfer girl nervously walked towards Emo.
"I'm a surfer, not a fighter." Bridgette quietly pleaded, "Please Emo, I don't want to fight."
The emo took no heed to her words and charged her like a rabid wolf. After ripping off her shirt, he grabbed her by the hair and dragged her to the edge of the circle. Ignoring her screaming, he grabbed Bridgette by the hem of her skirt and dangled her over the edge. When she started to slip out of her skirt, the surfer girl grabbed on to the belt loops and attempted to pull herself up. It was no use, as the loops broke and Bridgette fell into the water headfirst in her underwear. Bridgette resurfaced, sighed, and swam back to shore.
"The winner is Emo!" Izzy proclaimed, "So Ezekiel, what aspect of Bridgette do you like most? Her white bra or blue panties?"
"I though we were supposed to be dating Izzy!" he cried out in shock.
"Chill out, it's just a question." Izzy said, "Yeesh!"
"Our next bout is between Derek and Lindsay!" Kai explained. As the two went out to the starting platforms, Emo returned from his match.
"Don't you think that was a little bit brutal?" Dana asked to the emo.
"No, it was just brutal enough." he responded, "Everyone deserves a good beating once in a while."
The two focused their attention back on the battle and saw that the two contestants were already at the center platform.
Derek ran past Lindsay, who was giggling up to that point. When she looked down, her laughter ceased.
"Hey, what gives?" she cried as she covered herself up, "That's not very nice!"
"It's a stripping challenge Lindsay." Derek stated, holding her shorts in his hand.
"Alright then!" Lindsay agreed happily as she stole Derek's hat.
"Now we're getting somewhere!" Derek smiled. All of a sudden, Lindsay pushed him down and stripped him of his red button down shirt, revealing his black tank top.
"Oh that's how you're going to play this now." the skater said. He got up and stole Lindsay's beret, which caused her to remove Derek's tank top. Lindsay retrieved her jean shorts and put them back on, but did not realize that she had them on backwards. Derek jumped Lindsay from behind and unzipped the zipper on her butt. Lindsay rolled around to shake Derek off, but the skater had already stripped her of her shorts again. Derek easily pulled off Lindsay's shirt, but slipped off the edge of the giant circle.
"Derek is the winner!" Kai announced, "But Lindsay, a valiant effort..." He took a moment to gaze at Lindsay in her skin colored underwear, only to be whacked by a newspaper wielded by Izzy.
Meanwhile, Derek swam back back to the shore and took a few seconds to shake himself dry. He saw Amy swim over to a nearby dock with her clothes, so ran over to help her.
"Need a hand?" he asked.
The brunette beauty nodded and extended her free arm to the skater. He attempted to pull her out of the water, but found that he could not do so. Amy threw her wet clothes onto the dock and used both arms to pull herself out, but she failed.
"I think there's something caught on my foot!" Amy cried.
Derek tugged Amy back up four times, but the large piece of seaweed still clung tightly to her right ankle. At this point, the fourteen year old skater was getting flustered, as Amy's soaking underwear was clinging to her skin, revealing her prominent features. Blood rushed to Derek's cheeks as he observed Amy's moist cleavage. The final straw for him was when part of Amy's bra slipped off. Though he didn't see her exposed boob, blood shot out of his nose and he doubled over, causing Amy to fall into the water
From a distance, it appeared that the two were performing a very inappropriate act. Chris awoke and witnessed Derek accidentally grope Amy's breasts. He tried to get up, but his limbs were numb and they felt like lead weights. Chris began crying.
With a mighty tug, Derek pulled Amy free, but she went flying, landing on Derek stomach first. Her face grew in embarrassment when she realized that their heads were facing their crotches, resembling another lewd position.
"Amy, are you okay?" Derek said.
"Yeah." she replied, her voice trembling.
"I have one question left." Derek said.
"What's that?" Amy asked.
A joking smile grew on Derek's face. "Are you as turned on as I am?"
Amy scowled. "I'm not amused." She got back up and shoved Derek back into the water. Then, she ran back to camp to get changed.
The camera switched back to Izzy. "This has been an exciting challenge thus far! The rookies and castaways have two points each while the veterans have a big fat goose egg! Will they turn their luck around? Find out after this commercial break!"
Closing
Phew, this was a lot to write! I am satisfied with the fact that this is the longest chapter of this story ever, possibly only rivaled with the first one.
I still haven't given up writing. I will finish this story, because if I'm lucky, society will be so dumbed down in a thousand years this fanfic will be considered a great work of literature!
For Derek fans, I have tried Red Bull before and man, that stuff keeps your eyes open!
I will keep a running tab on the review count throughout the day so I know who to give the free fanfic to. Please read, review, and vote on the revised poll!
