"But I want to pick too," Hamish grumbles, pulling a bag onto his back.
"We're not 'choosing' Hai, we get chosen really. We're not even sure if we're looking for a baby or an older kid." John shuts the door and ushers Hamish forward.
"I want to go."
"Not this time Hai." We go downstairs and Hamish goes straight into Mrs Hudson's, she comes out to the door to say bye.
"How's it going? The woman seemed happy when she came to see me but I know these things are hard."
"It's fine, Mrs Hudson, I say, and she smiles.
"Goodbye. Have a good time!" she shouts as we walk out of the door. Is that the right thing to say…" I can hear her worry as we get to the street.
"You okay?" John asks when we're in the taxi, putting his hand on my leg.
"Yes. You're not. You're nervous."
"Well yeah, all these kids are wanting to be adopted and we can only pick one…" John trails off, in the tone of someone thinking about their aspirations.
"Yes, one. And we could just go to an agency and look for a baby instead. My brother-some things I can trust him on-suggested a few."
"I don't know. The older kids rarely get adopted; I want to see what it's like. Still, I'd like to adopt a younger kid, probably."
"A teenager would be the most interesting. We'd get to see if they can change in a few years rather than a lifetime. But this isn't something to experiment with." John grins and leans against me as I add the last sentence; he'd looked worried at first.
"Would you want to adopt a boy or a girl?"
"I have no preference." And the taxi's stopped. This is the house of a foster mother-we're really just observing the life of the children in her care, we won't be adopting any of these. The social services will fit a child to our profile that they think will best be suited to our lifestyle.
John takes a deep breath as we exit the cab, and interlaces his fingers with mine as we wait. The social worker is to meet us outside and we'll go in together. "Sherlock. Can you not insult everyone we meet here?"
"I don't intend to insult any of them."
"I know. Just, don't tell them any of your observations, or ask any questions that may seem even a tiny bit personal. Please? I don't want them thinking badly of us."
I stare it him for a second, and he just smiles. "There she is," John says. I'd known a few minutes ago having seen her car pass to turn around. kiss his cheek and turn to her.
"We can go in now?" I ask starting to walk. The social worker looks like she wants to say something, but just gestures forward.
"Today's visit is going to be an hour or two long,you can get an idea of the kids and I can see how the react to you and so on. Any decisions on age? Sure you don't want to find an agency and go with a baby? That's the usual approach, but I think it's better you're looking for someone older."
"Not sure. We'll meet these kids and make our decision by next visit." The social worker; Brenda I remember now, knocks on the door briefly then walks straight in.
A woman (husband works away, infertile, made soup earlier-spilled down front, needs a new car) comes to the door and Brenda introduces us.
"I'm Mandy, come in. I'll shout the kids down. Right now, there's two boys-brothers, they'll want to be together-you're only looking for one right?" John starts to answer but she doesn't pause for long enough for him to speak."5 and 10. A boy and girl both 2; they're in the kitchen. And Ruby, she's been with me for years, not one of those up for adoption, of course." She yells up the stairs and the brothers come down, followed by a sullen looking teenager.
"Come through." She gestures towards the kitchen. "Boys, take the gentlemen's coats."
"Not necessary." John says, beaming, hanging his coat on a peg and taking mine from me (I'd slipped mine off as Mandy was speaking.)
"We baked buns. Come see." The smallest boy takes John's hand and drags him along with Mandy. The older boy observes me warily, then looks at the girl. She nods at him and he follows his brother.
I should probably say something. "I'm Sherlock."
"Hi," the boy mutters, the girl however perks up.
"I'm Katie. I think I remember you from the news a while ago. You're a detective or something?"
"A Consulting Detective." She seems to be waiting for more, but I just scan her. "Your mother committed suicide?" She goes pale as soon as I speak.
"Sherlock?" I hear John calls me from the kitchen. I think I've upset her, he can hear us speaking from in there so he's trying to pull me away from doing anything worse.
"What-how did you know that?"
"Mostly a guess. The necklace you have on is hers-too old to have been bought recently, too long to be yours, fit for an adult. The catch on the back isn't a style used anymore; it can't be anything from Mandy because her family wouldn't have been able to afford that. Your place here has to be your mother's."
"But she could have given it to me; she could have died in another way? How did you know?"
"It seemed the most logical conclusion for you to be adopted here, and the reason you were the chain constantly. The suicide, well it's a crucifix, my first guess was that your mother got pregnant young, you were an accident and after giving birth she left you somewhere and killed herself, afraid to deal with the consequences- I know you've been in care since you were born and that was the first thought."
"I don't like that. You shouldn't know that. It's freaky. Good, but freaky. Can you teach me to find stuff like that?"
Strange response. She's lonely, been bullied a lot-she doesn't want to insult.
"Possibly. Not to my level, you wouldn't be able to do that. But I can show you a little."
"Sherlock?" John walks back in, a small girl in his arms.
"Yes, coming. I was talking to Jane here."
John looks at me quizzically and I smile. "Why do you have a child?"
"She likes me." He tickles her stomach, making her giggle and hands her out to me. "This is Katie."
"No, keep her." I step away, going to look at the second child and the two boys.
"Hello. Your names, please?" I ask and John moves to sit down.
No one spoke so Mandy introduced them. The ten year old- hoarding food in his room, it seems- she taps on the back of the head,"Danny", she then passes his brother a cloth to wipe his face, which was now covered in icing "Jayden." She moves on, picking up the small boy "Joseph. And your John has Katie."
"Yes, thank you." I stand there while John chats, rocking back on my heels.
"Sherlock? You playing charades with us?" I'd stopped listening until this, John was looking up at me from the table, the game box in the middle.
"No."
"Please? You'd be good."
"We need the same in teams and Brenda won't play. Be with us," the smallest boy, Jayden, asks. He stands up and pulls me by the hand.
"No thank you."
"Please?" the rest of the children chorused-how polite- and I roll my eyes and sit down.
"Fine."
John laughs at this and I scowl at the back of his head. "Not usually one to give into pressure."
"Shut up."
Jayden grins and gets up. He picks a card and Mandy whispers the answer in his ear so he's okay with it.
"Jay, remember that film is," Mandy does the 'camera' gesture with her hands, "the book is," she mimes this too. "And that television is," she shows his the movement, which he immediately copies.
"So, a TV show." Katie says out loud.
"Yes!" Jayden exclaims.
"No talking." Mandy encourages, and Jayden puts a finger to his lips.
"What's it about Jay? Come on." He springs into action then,roaring, then an arm to his back, mimicking a fin. Of course, I had it from the first second of his actions-make of game, time it was published, to show someone of his age will know well enough to act out- well, almost. It was an animal show, all dangerous. But I had no idea of the name, it's not something that would ever be relevant.
"Dangerous animals. Kids show," I say this quietly to Katie, who immediately comes out with, "Deadly 60." (Jayden jumps up and down with excitement.
"Yes! Right!"
Next Danny takes his turn, trying to act out some film called 'Finding Nemo' (I think Hamish may have toy from that. At least, the name is in my memory, not the movie or anything to do with it) but fails to do it in the time limit.
"Sherlock, your turn," Mandy prompts and Katie pushes my arm a little.
"No, I don't want to."
"You agreed to the game." Katie seems to be comfortable enough with me now to order me around, rather than being shy as I would have predicted.
"Why aren't you going?"
"I'll be next." She pushes my elbow again and I stand up. John looks up at me gleefully, and I roll my eyes at him.
"Stop moaning." He mutters something to the baby on his lap and waves her hand at me. "The card, Sherlock." He hands me one from the box and starts the timer.
'The Three Bears,' okay a fairytale. Those I do know of at least. Not deleted. Good.
This game is stupid. I show the 'book' action, which Jayden shouts out. Katie pulls him back to the chair, telling him to be quiet.
"Why can't I just say it?"
"Not the game. Come on, your time's going," John said lightly.
"Please. Just do the action. Don't think you look silly," Katie says, giving me an expression John calls puppy dog eyes' on Hamish.
I hold up three fingers, shaking my head when they say syllables. "The number three?"
I nod. "A book, Three…" I put a finger to my lips, then mime the porridge scene. The larger and smaller bowls.
"What?"
"10 seconds"
I groan, then mime the growling of a bear. Katie immediately yells out the answer, followed by Jayden.
"Idiots," I mumble as I sit down.
"Sherlock!" John almost yells, but he clams his voice. "He doesn't mean it."
"I do."
"Sherlock thinks everyone but himself is stupid and-"
"They are."
"He can't help it-well. Anyway, don't take it personally. He calls me an idiot all the time."
"He's like that with Hamish too?" the social worker buts in, surprised.
"Who's Hamish?" Katie asks. She's nosy, I like that.
"I can speak for myself. No, I don't talk to him like that. He'd be upset, sometimes I am too…frank with him, but he's okay. Sometimes I have to apologise but he accepts it. He's our son, Katie."
"Uhm…okay," Brenda says furiously scribbling, but I expected that .
John shifts over, explaining something further to her, but he's pulled away quickly to get on with the game.
After that, and a bun forced upon each of us, we leave.
"Went well enough. You two okay?"
"It was fine."
"Yeah. Good." John looks distant, thinking, plotting.
We say goodbye (well, I don't answer) and John and I wait for a taxi. "What are you thinking?"
"Can't guess?" John laughs, grabbing my hand.
"I'm not a mind reader."
"You come pretty close most of the time. Anyway, I was just trying to decide. Can't we adopt more kids?"
"No."
"I wasn't saying that seriously…I. Nevermind. We'll think, ok."
I don't like this attitude. I don't know what to say to that, but the taxi comes and John knows the driver from school or something, so we don't have any chance to talk properly.
"Stop brooding. It's fine."
"But can't you just decide now?"
"No, it doesn't work like that. Delete what I said or something. Don't be like this."
"Fine. Tell me when you know."
