This is kind of a (read: extremely) short update, but I wanted to post something before I hibernate from fanfiction with my month of exams and revision. (Eve and Vanessa, the birthday chapter will be done as soon as possible. I promise!)
Can I also have an R.I.P. for my iPod (containing most of my notes for future chapters :L) that, like the idiot I am, I left on a plane last week. *inset Katniss-saluting gif*
Seeing as this will probably be my last update for the Hell Month of revision, I will leave you with the advice to go look up the amazing Jack Quaid. Check out Sitting Babies on youtube and marvel at his awesomeness :)
''If Skulduggery doesn't show up soon, we're going to have to go after the hag ourselves.''
Tanith wasn't joking. There was a hag loose in the Sanctuary that Madam Mist had ordered them to recapture and dump in a holding cell. Fletcher had proudly announced to the group he had caught the hag single-handedly before he dragged in a really old, ugly woman that worked in the Archives. He received a slap about the head from Valkyrie at that.
Most of the Crew was in a Sanctuary waiting room - Valkyrie, Tanith, Anton and Fletcher. Even Erskine and Ghastly had decided to tag along because they had decided that the paperwork they were going through was giving them tension headaches.
The only one late was Skulduggery.
Erskine checked his watch again. ''I think you're right, Tanith. There was a rumour the hag was stampeding down near my office. If she rips up my new decor, I won't be very happy.''
A steely look entered his normally gentle eyes and Anton nervously began massaging his friend's shoulders.
''Right,'' said Ghastly, shouldering a baseball bat where no-one quite knew he had procured from. ''Let's go.''
Just as the group stood up, assembling weapons and badass expressions, the door to the room flew open and a man walked in, wearing a sharp suit they were familiar with.
''Hello,'' said Skulduggery.
His facade had a beard.
Everyone stopped moving, silent as they stared at the sight in front of them.
Ghastly took a step forward, his lips twitching. ''I moustache you a question, but I'm shaving it for later.''
There was a snort as Fletcher threw his hands to his mouth, trying to prevent his laugh.
The group looked at Fletcher, then to one another, and as one burst into uncontrollable whoops of laughter.
Skulduggery stood rigidly still, arms crossed over his chest as Valkyrie sunk to the floor, clutching her side as she howled with mirth.
Erskine schooled his feautures into indifference. ''Skulduggery, you do know you've got something on your face?''
There was another roar of hilarity from the others, and Skulduggery's jaw worked furiously as he bit back a retort. ''I thought we had a hag to catch?''
''Th-that's why he took so much time getting here,'' Tanith gasped. ''He was trying to think of a way to get rid of the beard.''
Fletcher smacked his hand across his knee as he wheezed with laughter, then moaned. ''I think you gave me a stitch.''
Skulduggery slapped Valkyrie's hands away as she tried to play with his moustache and stalked out of the room. ''Fine. I'll catch it myself, you ungrateful hounds.''
Even as he stormed down he corridor he could hear Anton rapping. ''If you've got facial hair trouble I feel bad for you son, I've got 99 problems but my beard ain't one!''
This was followed by fresh paroxysms of laughter, and up ahead a mage stuck his head out of a room, saw Skulduggery's beard and ducked back inside with a scream of ''The hag!''
Skulduggery sighed. It really wasn't his day.
