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(NOTE! Sorry for the delay, there was an absolutely hideous storm here yesterday and that meant no internet *sob*... Also, there aren't as many words in the update as I would have liked, this week was kind of hectic for me, but I hope you'll accept these chapters anyway. Something big is gonna happen soon, just warning you. *wink*And, as an added bonus, I posted the first chapter of the Malik and Hadiya fic. It's called Family Men.)

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Chapter 44; Cool Like Jazz

Desmond looked ready to bite someone's head off when Altair and Ezio showed up later that evening. His hair was standing up all over, his eyes were puffy and bloodshot, and he looked like perhaps, he wasn't entirely conscious.

Malik was watching something on TV with an amused grin on his face, it looked like the Bachelorette or something else that reeked of lust amplified by too much alcohol and over use of the word 'connection'. Altair was afraid to ask why he looked so cheerful, maybe the over confidant blonde asshole had been kicked off…

When Desmond's eyes landed on them, he could tell right away that Ezio looked different. He was smiling and wearing clothes that weren't his. Loose plaid pants and a gray hooded sweatshirt. But there was something not quite the same, it was the angle of his shoulders, the light in his eyes… Whatever had caused it though, was positive. Ezio shuffled to the chair Malik wasn't occupying and sat, pulling his feet up with him.

"You look better." He plucked at the blanket Desmond had pulled up tightly around his waist.

Desmond scoffed; "The food here is terrible." He glared hatefully when Altair walked past him grinning as well. "You let me get alcohol poisoned, you bastard."

Malik made an amused sound in his throat and smiled at Altair. "He doesn't remember a thing."

Altair sighed and came up to the side of the bed hands shoved deeply into his pockets; "You didn't have alcohol poisoning, Des, someone slipped something in your drink."

Desmond crossed his arms high over his chest and looked pointedly away with an irate expression on his face. "Nobody got near my drinks, I remember that at least. I'm careful… Unlike you."

"Aw, don't be like that!" Altair ruffled his hair, chuckling when the younger man's arms flailed, IV tubes twisting. "Here, I got something that'll make you feel better." He shucked off his bag and fished inside it, pulling out a box wrapped in copy paper covered with scribbled stick figures doing obscene things. "Sorry I couldn't give it to ya' on your birthday."

Desmond took it and glared at him like Oscar the Grouch. "I'm still mad at you."

Altair turned to look at Malik who was on his feet, stretching and scratching and yawning.

"There's a cab is waiting down stairs, all paid up to take you home. And you can leave the jacket on my bed."

The older man grunted in a pleased way. "Just in time for dinner too. If it wouldn't cause my head to spontaneously combust I might actually say thank you."

Altair rolled his eyes and gave Malik the finger as the older man left, then flapped his hands frantically at Desmond with wide eyes when he realized the package hadn't even been tampered with; "Come on! Open it! Jeez, do you need a written invitation or something!"

Desmond seemed to be less angry and started carefully pulling at the paper, making sure none of it was ripped so later he could amuse himself with the cartoons Altair had drawn on it. He was so intent on getting the wrapping off in one piece he didn't realize what was under it until he'd unfolded the paper and laid it aside. Then he let out a little grunt and grabbed the box with both hands, his eyes wide. He just stared at it for a few seconds, then looked up at Altair with a shocked expression on his face. "Is this just the box to your phone with like, socks in it or some shit?"

"No. You passed that test, so you're on the bill now… Just don't break the thing it was expensive." He dropped into the chair Malik had vacated and wiggled his hips into a comfortable position.

Desmond had the box torn open and the phone out in less than fifteen seconds. Muttering to himself that it was so cool and wait until that bastard Shaun saw. He'd be so jealous.

Ezio chuckled and shook his head. "What time are you being released tomorrow?"

"Tenish." He made seesaw motions with his hand and dangled the phone's charger at Ezio; "Stick that in the wall beside you there. I want to check this thing out."

Ezio chuckled and stuck the prongs in the socket, but by the time he'd turned back around Desmond had slumped toward him and was utterly asleep.

"A-Altair?" Ezio's eyes were wide in alarm.

He grunted and glanced at him, face splitting in a grin. "He's a stubborn shit isn't he."

"What?"

"The type of drug he was given can take up to forty-eight hours to pass through your system. I'm surprised he was awake as long as that, but, like I said—He's stubborn." He yawned and glanced around. "Are you hungry? I can order a pizza or something."

After a moment Ezio nodded.

"Do you like anchovies?"

"Yeah, and sausage." And he saw the most miraculous thing happen… Altair turned slightly green and gave an almost dry heave like shudder. "What the hell was that?"

"A-anchovies? You… You actually like anchovies?"

"Yes, I also like bacon, onions and tomato slices on my pizza, go figure." He poked his tongue out playfully. "And I didn't bring my toothbrush! Wanna make out?"

"Yeah, not so much... Bacon too? You do know that pigs eat where they shit, right?"

"And yet they taste delicious!" He rubbed his stomach and licked dramatically at his lips; "Mmmmm!"

"You're demented… And sick." He gave another full body shudder and plucked his phone from his pocket; "Maybe tacos would be better…"

"Not really. Unless you get the chicken you're still getting pork in your food, and nine times out of ten there's pork fat in the chicken too."

"You're not leavin' me much of an option here…"

"You really don't like pork."

"No, I don't… It's dirty and disgusting—And I was misfortunate enough once to see my adoptive mother take down a jar of pickled pig's feet in less than five minutes… I haven't been right since."

Ezio giggled behind his hand. "My uncle Mario made a whole roast pig when I was little for a company barbecue… I remember feeling dizzy watching the thing rotate on a spit because it still had its eyes."

"Ezio… You're gonna turn me into a vegetarian."

"Relax, I can handle a pizza without anchovies, bacon and sausage. I'm not spoiled to it." He flapped a hand at the older man dismissively; "But seriously, have them put tomato slices and onion on it. You'll love it."

Altair eyed him warily as he ordered it, and they didn't speak until the delivery man called Altair's phone and said he was waiting at the back door of the hospital being swarmed by zombie-like doctors.

Altair leaned over Desmond and pried his eyelids apart, peering in to see just how deeply asleep the younger man was, then said in a rather unassuming voice; "Desmond, I'll buy you dinner every day for the rest of this year if you open your eyes right now and look at me."

Since Desmond didn't open his eyes or in any way react, Altair released a pleased hum and motioned for Ezio to follow him; "He's out cold."

The nurses looked up and Ezio whispered an explanation to them as they passed. But as easy as it had sounded, meeting the delivery man at the back of the hospital, it was damned hard to actually find an exit that took them there.

It was entirely too maze like in there. Up two floors, down four floors, take the stairs then the elevator. Twice they climbed off elevators and walked quickly down corridors that were completely empty and silent, and Ezio found himself gripping Altair's sleeve because from every angle it felt like ghosts were groping at them out of the walls.

Five wrong turns later and they wound up on the maternity ward, and turned around quickly, and took the elevator to the hospital cafeteria, found a janitor and asked him for directions. A few minutes later they were wandering through the unseen bowels of the hospital, past conference rooms and kitchens and down hallways that looked like subway tunnels—Ezio swore he saw a train coming at them out of the gloom, and then, they pushed through big metal double doors and found themselves in some kind of a warehouse or loading dock. The big garage style doors were open and nurses and doctors and people in various uniforms stood around on elevated sidewalks with cigarettes and cups of coffee. They turned big dead eyes to the strange newcomers and watched them like bats hanging from the roof of a cave.

They got outside just in time to see the delivery man's car pulling out of its parking spot and heading toward the street.

"Hey!" Altair bolted and half a second later Ezio took off after him.

To an outsider, perhaps they did look like zombies from some unforeseen apocalyptic future running wild after a poor defenseless survivor, the doctors and nurses and other employees of the hospital sure did have a laugh at their expense.

The poor pizza man thought he was being mugged when, after waiting almost half an hour for some no-show asshole with what he was pretty sure was a fake name, some weirdo launches himself off the sidewalk and starts banging at his poor defenseless Jetta as he tried to drive away. He was about to slam on the breaks and give the idiot a piece of his mind, when a second idiot had come up on his passenger side with a wad of ones in his fist, shaking them like a drunk at a strip club.

It was so absurd, so unexpected, he stopped the car and stared out at the two strange men with an expression on his face that was purely and simply 'what the fuck'.

Fifteen minutes later, after Altair was able to convince the poor guy that he wasn't a mugger, and yes that was actually his name, he and Ezio plopped themselves down on a bench out side, just a stone's throw from the smoker's shed, and popped open the pizza box.

"I have never worked so hard for a fucking pizza in my life…" Altair grumbled, folding two slices together like a sandwich.

Ezio snorted and disappeared into the smoker's shed for a minute to abuse the vending machines for a few sodas when he returned Altair was still mumbling to himself about the sheer ridiculousness of it.

"So, we're having dinner and we've spent the whole day in one another's presence… Does this constitute a date?" Ezio was tearing the crust off his slices, leaving them on a napkin to eat later.

Altair shrugged one shoulder; "If this is a date then breakfast was one too… At least then we didn't have to it down like a coupla' lions."

Ezio rolled his eyes; "So, second date?"

"Sure, why not."

Ezio nodded; "My sister says there's a 'three date rule'… what does that mean?"

Altair choked, gagged, choked again and finally was able to force it down. He continued coughing for a few minutes and staring at Ezio through watery eyes, but after a moment was able swallow a couple gulps of soda and re-center himself. "That's—uh—that's a 'no sex before the third date' thing I think."

Ezio blushed and his eyes went wide.

"What? Is something wrong?"

"No… I just… I just realized my little sister has had sex, and I think I died a little."

"Your little brother probably has too, or will soon." Altair grinned deviously. "If the way Shaun complains about them is anything close to realistic, I mean… he was going nuts a while back because he walked in on them making out. I think he's just a big prude."

Ezio grunted and took an angry bite of his pizza; "He's also in denial of the mammoth sized crush he has on Desmond."

Altair was quiet for a few seconds, then giggled.

"What, you didn't know? And don't you ever do that again! Oh, my GOD, that was the creepiest thing I've ever heard!" Ezio tried not to smile as he scolded, but it was damn hard to manage.

"No, no… I had a feeling, but—" He shook his head; "Ah, this is just hilarious."

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It took a week really for it all to sink in.

In fact, Ezio was having dinner with his family the following Wednesday when it actually hit him that not only had he confessed his feelings to Altair… He'd lain around on the man's bed for hours, and simply out of habit and some strange sense of duty had come so close to actually giving in and letting his body do what it had been trained to do—

But Altair had given him a choice, and he'd chosen to stop, it had been such a relief to just have that choice. Nobody had ever given him a choice like that before… it either hurt too much to do anything but bite into the pillow and hope the bastard finished quickly, or bite into the pillow and try to convince himself he wanted it too… Actually having a choice between doing and not doing was—He didn't have words to describe it.

Wonderful maybe?

Fantastic?

Freeing?

"What on earth are you grinning about?" Claudia nudged him in the shin with the toe of her flat. Her expression though, said she probably already had an idea as to why.

"Oh, leave him alone…" Giovanni winked at her.

"But he and Petruccio have the same look on their faces and it's disturbing." She lifted her hands as if maybe she wanted to stretch his cheeks out like a cartoon, or pull his hair but was trying to make it look like she wanted to pat him lovingly instead.

"Don't bring me into this." Petruccio said turning his attention back to his meal, still grinning a little.

Claudia turned on him like a cat after a wounded little mouse, her face pinched into a scheming feline like grin. "Why don't you take off that jacket, Petruccio? Or are you trying to hide something under your collar?"

He tugged at it and glanced around guiltily.

Maria swatted at her daughter's shoulder gently; "Leave him alone. You've never tried to hide hickeys from us before?"

Giovanni sighed and bowed his head; "You're giving me gray hair."

Claudia rolled her eyes; "Like you've never had a hickey before…"

He mumbled something and Maria's ears perked up.

"Oh? What was that?" She lowered her lashes seductively; "I seem to remember you were very fond of my teeth when we were younger."

His eyes widened and blood rushed to his face.

Ezio tried to keep from laughing, but ended up just shaking his head and hiding his amusement by shoveling food in his mouth.

"Though, I do have to say, your father is very good with his mouth."

Petruccio spat water out of his nose, Claudia's mouth dropped open and a bit of food fell out and Ezio choked.

Maria blinked rapidly and scowled at her children; "What's so funny? I'm very serious."

"Mama, I don't think you know what you're saying." Petruccio's face was redder than his father's.

She was quiet for a moment then her cheeks went pink; "You're all so filthy minded! The marks, the MARKS! I had to hide them from my father or he would have castrated him!"

Giovanni covered his face and just bowed his head in defeat.

Maria squared her shoulders and lifted her wine glass, swirling the liquid around for a few seconds before she looked down her blushing nose at it and crossed her legs slowly beneath the table; "But he's good at that too…"

"Mother!"

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