Chapter Fifty Two
Bella
I stayed very close to Jaspers side as we walked out of the motel and across the parking lot to the car. Once inside I relaxed a little but it was hard, my senses were being overwhelmed with all the new sensations my body was receiving.
"Will it always be like this Jasper? Everything clamouring for attention at once?"
"Once you've fed again you'll feel better. Your brain is learning to adapt, to get everything prioritized and once it does you'll only notice the important things but always remember you are now stronger, faster, and lethal to humans if you don't take care and I don't just mean from your instinct to drink their blood. If you move too fast or use a little too much pressure when touching a human you could maim or kill them. You have to be extremely careful until it becomes second nature."
"Did you have to think about all that when you were with me?"
"Of course or I could have killed you but now..."
"Now I'm as strong and fast as you."
"Stronger and faster actually because your body still has its own blood supply feeding it. That lasts about a year, maybe two and then we will be the same"
"So for now I could hurt you?"
"Yes but you wont and if for any reason you did I'd heal quickly"
I touched his throat with my fingers very carefully,
"I already hurt you Jasper and that wont fade."
"That's different, it was done by your vampire instinct, you're warning other females away from your mate."
"Then I guess I shouldn't feel guilty but I do...very"
His kiss settled my thoughts and when he pulled over I realised we were in a forest,
"Ready for your first hunting trip?"
I nodded eagerly, the thirst was burning fiercely in my throat again.
"Will I ever lose this burning feeling?"
"No, not if you decide to live on animal blood. It will always be there in the background. Only human blood gives us a total rest from the burning sensation in our throat. That's why most vampires choose to live on human blood."
"I want to try animal blood, I want us both to live on it, if we can. Will it be very hard for you to change back?"
"Yes but I'll get there with you by my side Bella. We'll do it together."
I was extremely nervous about hunting animals, they were fast and unpredictable and I was sure I would make a fool of myself, fall flat on my face quite probably, but Jasper took my nerves and stopped me close to a small creek to listen. At first there were just too many noises but then something inside me, a hunting instinct I guess took over and my head snapped to the right. I could hear a thumping sound, a creature's heart beat and smell the aroma of its blood. It made my mouth water although not so badly as the maids had done. I pushed that thought away, I would not become a monster who killed innocent humans to live.
"What should I do?"
My whisper was so low the very breeze almost drowned it out,
"Let your instinct take over Bella"
I took a deep breath of the scented air and my body moved on its own, crouching low I moved silently through the undergrowth where as a human I would have fallen and broken something not to mention making enough noise to frighten everything in a five mile radius!
Through the leaves I could see two deer, small ones, drinking and part of me wanted to watch and then shoo them away but the larger part took over and I sprang, killing the first with a blow to the neck and snatching the second out of the air as it tried to spring to freedom. I drained this one greedily, the burn in my throat easing with each mouthful and picked up the second turning with a snarl as I recognised another vampire in the clearing. He stood watching me then sank down very slowly onto his haunches and my snarl quietened a little. He looked familiar but was he trying to steal my prey? He didn't move and I finished draining the second deer throwing its carcass into the bushes and wiping my hands on my shirt although there was no blood on them, only the strange feel of the deer's coat on my fingers. I backed away and he stood, did he want to fight me? I was strong and fast and I'd just fed so I was ready. I didn't wait for him to attack but sprang on him my teeth snapping close to his throat but then I recognised his scent, this was Jasper, my mate, why hadn't I recognised him? I'd almost killed him!
I jumped backwards and hid my shame in my hands, what must he think of me?
"Bella, it's OK. I understand, everything is so different. Can I hold you?"
I nodded, unable to look into his beautiful face for my guilt but when I felt his arms around me I melted into him sobbing dryly and apologising over and over, hoping he would accept it.
"Bella hush now. This is all new to you, I shouldn't have approached until you'd finished. You did really well by the way. How did you find deer blood?"
I swallowed nervously then looked at him tentatively,
"You forgive me?"
"I forgive you"
He lifted my chin with a finger and kissed me on the lips and suddenly I forgot all about blood and my thirst, I had another that had taken over. I pushed him to the ground tearing at his clothes in my eagerness and once we were both naked I straddled his admittedly willing body and took my pleasure. This time I was the one to feel the terrible pain of a bite as he marked me, rolling over until he could look down on me.
"Just remember Bella, you are mine now, mine for all eternity."
As my flesh healed leaving the crescent scar of his bite on my neck we lay together and only when I felt no pain at all did he pull me to my feet.
"Let's see if we can find enough out of these rags to get us back to the motel shall we?"
I groaned looking at the ripped fabric but with a little ingenuity we managed to cover ourselves enough not to get arrested if we should be stopped. I really needed to learn some self-control before I hurt Jasper or got ourselves arrested! Back at the motel the others were waiting and I ran through eager to get away from Peter but of course my super vampire hearing picked up every word he uttered.
"Well Major, looks like you got ravaged by a hell cat. I hope it was worth it. Did she bite you?"
I waited, I had bitten him on the hip this time but I thought it had healed.
"If she did I'm not telling you Peter. Remember she's a newborn so be careful. She needs our help and guidance."
"It looks like it, that girl is no newborn or she'd have slaughtered the whole motel. She's got it almost under control as it is, I like her and I think she'll be good for you. Cute in the nude too"
I groaned silently and grabbed some fresh clothes from my bag. If I was almost in control what must it feel like to be a real newborn? I was just glad I had Jasper and his friends to help me...even Peter!
