It was that time of the night where everyone had tipped from buzzed into drunk. Mikasa was having fun taking advantage of her sobriety to beat everyone at Mario Kart. Eren was feeling far more relaxed than he had earlier and as he looked around he could see that Krista seemed to have cheered up as well as she elbowed Ymir for hitting her with a shell. Something though, struck him as off about the scene – about the whole evening really – but at this point he was just far enough past drunk that he couldn't quite place what it was.

When he surrendered his controller to Marco he realized that there was a forest of empty beer bottles on the side table. He sighed and decided to be the good house guest and bring the bottles to the recycling before Sasha knocked them over. He gathered up all of them and slowly made his way to the kitchen, trying not to trip over anything. He nearly dropped all of them in shock when he saw a silhouette sitting at the table in the darkened kitchen. He got a brief adrenalin rush from his momentary fright before recognizing the figure.

"Jean?"

He got a grunt in response and as his eyes adjusted to the minimal amount of light he could see that Jean had his very own forest of bottles on the table. Eren dumped the bottles in his arms in the recycling bin and was about to simply leave Jean to whatever he was doing when it hit him. The entire night he hadn't heard Jean speak even once. He had been there when they were eating but had sat off to the side, not participating in any conversation or in the prolonged teasing of Connie. He wasn't out on the couch playing Mario Kart and challenging Ymir to a fist fight; no super powers, no shape-shifting –house rules. Marco never let it get that far though.

He and Jean might not be friends in the strictest sense of the term, but they had mutual friends and had been hanging out together regularly in some capacity since their first year of college. He looked back at Jean, his head in his hands and slumped over the table. He might not be best friends with the guy, but he could at least make sure that he wasn't sick.

"Hey uh… Jean?" When he didn't get a response, he prodded at Jean's shoulder and repeated his name. "Jean? Hello, Earth to Jean?"

"What the fuck do you want Jaeger?" Eren was taken aback by the angry snarl and Jean's sudden swipe at him.

"I was just trying to see if you were dying, Horseface. Really gonna snap at me for being nice?" He watched as Jean grabbed the bottle closest to him and took a swig.

Okay universe, you owe me some serious fucking karma points for this shit.

Eren pulled out the chair next to Jean and sat down, clearing away the empty bottles he realized that Jean had gone through almost a full six by himself. He carefully reached out to take the half-full bottle that Jean had been holding a moment before.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"Making sure you don't fucking die of alcohol poisoning."

"Fuck off." Eren caught a glimpse of his face in the light as Jean turned away and saw that his eyes were red-rimmed and glassy.

"Jean?" He took a quieter tone now. "Should I go get Marco?"

"No!" They looked at each other, taken aback by Jean's outburst. "No, that's… prob'ly the wors' thing t' do right now."

"Okay, I really hope I don't regret this but… do you want to talk?" Jean looked up and met his eyes. Wow, he really has been crying. What the hell happened?

"Not really, but yeah."

"What does that mean?"

"Really sucks when person y'like doesn' like you back. 'Specially like this."

"Did you seriously fucking ask Mikasa out again? What the hell, Jean?"

"Wha? What're you talkin 'bout? Marco. I told Marco I like him." Eren was left dumbstruck and staring at Jean, his mouth with slightly open as his brain tried to start functioning again.

"Marco? As in Marco Bodt? The guy who's sitting out there playing Mario Kart."

"Do we know any other Marcos?" Jean glared at him.

"Sorry, I just… I didn't know you liked guys?" Okay, well my world just got turned upside down. "I thought you liked Mikasa?"

"Huh? Yeah, she's pretty I guess but it's always been Marco." Wow, you fucking asshole.

"So you asking her out multiple times freshman year was what then?"

"Wanted t'be normal."

"Oh." Eren chewed at his lip and an awkward silence dragged on. "Am I the first person besides Marco you came out to?"

"Yeah. Kin'a messed up huh? Shoulda known he'd shoot me down though. Shouldn've assumed he liked guys just 'cause he never dated women. It was stupid. Sorry, y'don't care an' I'm tellin' you this shit." He allowed his head to drop down onto the table making a thud and causing the bottles to rattle.

"Look, I get it okay? It's not easy and… just… I'm really fucking awful at this, okay?" He heard Jean give a watery chuckle.

"Always been shit at feelings."

"You're pretty awful too, Horseface." They both laughed quietly at the awful nickname that Eren had given him.

"Fuckin' hate it when y'call me Horseface."

"Sorry."

There was another awkward pause and Eren heard Jean let out a shaky breath.

"Y'know what it's like though yeah? Havin' someone not like you back?"

"Pretty sure everyone knows what that feels like."

"No, like now. That Levi guy – he's the The Hawk, yeah? – you like him but he doesn' like you." Eren gaped at him.

"Where did you…?" No point in holding back now. "Is it that obvious? Does everyone else know?"

"Nuh-uh. Saw you in the diner for breakfast. You were flirting, he wasn' happy."

"That's –" Completely true. Eren swallowed the lump in his throat. "Yeah, he doesn't like me back. I had a stupid hero crush on him, then he was an ass and I just wanted to fuck him –" Jean laughed "–shut up he's hot! But now… I think I actually like him, but I'm fine with being friends…" He trailed off and ended with a shrug.

"Same with Marco, 'cept he's avoiding me now. Shouldna said anything. We've been friends f'r so long and now…"

Eren heard him try and stifle what might have been a sob and did what would probably be on the list of the top ten most awkward things he had ever done; he pulled Jean into a hug.

"Life's shitty." Eren tightened his arms around Jean. "And you're going to be fucking fine because you're too much of a stubborn horse's ass to fall apart over a stupid crush."

"Not a crush. In love with him for years. Just couldn't…" Another huge shaky inhale. "I couldn't say it."

Holy fuck, he's been in love with Marco foryears? They've been friends since before they could read, I wonder how long… fucking Horseface making me give a shit. I mean, it's weird being around Levi and I've known him for two weeks, Jean has known Marco for almost two decades. What is that even like? Jesus.

They sat in their awkwardly slumped sideways hug for a moment longer before Jean shook himself free.

"Hey Eren?"

"Yeah?"

"Wanna make out?"

"Where the hell did that come from?"

"I'm an emotion wreck?"

"That's not exactly a good reason to make out with someone. I think it's the opposite actually."

"Would you sleep with me?" Jean was looking at Eren, the picture of calm while Eren stared at him in shock.

"Okay, how much have you had to drink, Horseface?"

"Five an' half. Serious though, would you?"

"What like if we didn't know each other and met in a bar?"

"Yeah."

"Dunno… maybe? Depends."

"Depends 'n what?"

"Well I'm going to assume your face still looks like a horse so that's points off already." Eren ignored Jean's glare and continued. "Also depends on what you're wearing, my mood, your mood… honestly, it really comes down to how long it's been since I last got laid."

"When was the last time you got laid?"

"About six months ago? I think?" At this point Eren had decided to just roll with whatever Jean said since he seemed to be starting to feel a bit better, or at least he was acting like he felt better. "I don't remember his name… he was a grad student. You?"

"End of break party with this girl Kristi. She was in my summer course."

"Have you ever been with a guy? Or were you saving your first man-sex for Marco."

"No and fuck you, Eren."

"What, did you want to?"

"If I said yes?"

"I'd say it's an awful idea because you're sorting your shit out with Marco and we've both been drinking but I'm sober enough to know that it's an awful idea."

"So you aren'ttotally not okay with it." Jean's smirk lacked some of its cocky effect when he had clearly been crying not too long ago.

"Jean, I am not going to pop your gay cherry."

"Might make 'em jealous."

"Marco is straight and making Levi jealous would imply that he cared to begin with."

"Fine, but are we friends now? I feel like we should be friends now."

"I think coming out to someone and propositioning them after telling them you're in love with your childhood best friend and roommate is some kinda fucked up that results in friendship. So yeah I guess."

"Cool."

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Wryers over on Tumblr made fan art for ALYNA!

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