A./N.: Hello everybody. I got kinda, sorta carried away with this chapter. I hope it still makes sense and is not too abrupt. Please feel free to drop me a line of correction. Enjoy reading it anyway.

CHAPTER 44

Twilight had settled over Downton, covering everything with a dark blanket of calm. Elsie felt her eyes droop continually and it became harder and harder to suppress a massive yawn. The cushions on Mrs Crawley's sofa seemed exceptionally comfortable and lulled her more and more into a state between waking and sleeping. The nurse had clicked her tongue a little about Elsie's lack of appetite, but hadn't said a word, knowing too well that recuperating people often found it hard to eat an entire meal. Never-the-less, she was very concerned about the other woman's loss of weight through fever and infection. Dr Clarkson had drawn up a nourishment chart and even some easy exercises to strengthen her left side again and help with the tightness of the scar tissue. Today, though, had more been an exercise in making Elsie comfortable in her temporary surroundings. They all had been surprised that Elsie had not once asked after the Abbey or how the staff was coping. Mainly because Mr Carson had sat very closely next to her on the sofa until tea time when he had been compelled to return to the Abbey and the dinner service. It was the first time in days that he had spared a thought to his work.

Now the three ladies were on their own. Elsie sleepily lounging on the sofa and Glenna leaning against the door frame, sipping her cooling tea and observing her little sister. She was still uneasy around Elsie, not able to forgive herself for ignoring Elsie for so long and only realizing how serious her condition had been when Lord Grantham had informed her. Mrs Crawley came up behind her and could easily read the countenance of the other woman. She shook her head sadly because she knew exactly what the other woman was thinking, having had a long and extensive conversation about everything. She sighed softly before taking Glenna's cup from her unresisting hands.

"Maybe you could help your sister upstairs, Mrs Murray," she suggested gently. "She seems almost asleep already."

Glenna nodded hesitantly, swallowing lightly and dropping her gaze to her toes. Her voice was small as she asked, "Is there anything I have to pay special attention to?" Maybe it was easier to handle when she regarded her sister as a patient and only touched her for nursing purposes. "You have talked me through changing her bandages already, but not about the care of the incision."

Isobel cast her eyes towards Elsie and silently counted to ten so that she had time enough to choose her words carefully. It wouldn't do to blurt out what was on the tip of her tongue. She wouldn't get in the line of fire between those two extraordinary women – not for all the money in the world. "No, there isn't anything special," she replied calmly. "Simply make sure she is comfortable and help her change her bandages. … If you rather that I …"

Glenna shook her head decisively. "No, thank you, Mrs Crawley," she said determinedly. "We'll be fine." Without any further words, she walked into the room and towards Elsie's reclining form on the sofa. Leaning over her she gently touched her shoulder and with her other hand stroked her cheek. "Elsie dear, come on let's get you upstairs and ready for bed."

"But I'm not tired," Elsie mumbled sleepily, childishly rebellious against her older sister. Her head lolled to the side and she snuggled her cheek into Glenna's palm.

Tenderly smiling Glenna stroked a strand of hair from Elsie's forehead and behind her ear. "I know, a leannan," she cajoled softly. "You can still sit up and read. Come now … for me."

It worked as it had when they were little girls. Nothing really important, major, had changed in all those years. Glenna still knew her sister better than anybody else in the world and Elsie still looked up to her older sister, trusting her without reservation. She needed Glenna's help to heave herself up off the couch, and when she was up she leaned heavily against Glenna's maternal bosom, her head against her collarbone and her breathing erratic. Her sister's strong arms immediately came around her and securely held her up. A look of panic flitted across her face as her head whipped around to search for Mrs Crawley. Both women were very worried about the weakened state of their patient, but calmly tried to reassure Elsie instead of descending into a full-blown panic.

"I think I better help you two upstairs," Mrs Crawley spoke calmly, but her hands speaking another language entirely. Her right hand wrapped around Elsie's wrist and covertly searched for her pulse, silently counting along. Her left hand gently pushed Elsie's hair from her face and cupped her forehead, checking for a temperature.

Both women each grasped one of Elsie's elbows and helped the younger woman up the stairs. Elsie leaned her head against Glenna's shoulder and let their comfort and care wash over her, for once not complaining and meekly accepting the fuss on her account. Glenna's heart sank as she held up the slackening body of her sister, accepting defeat in this instance. Usually Elsie was a fighter, tooth and nail, and never gave up.

"Come, lassie, we'll get you sorted out and then you can sleep and heal," she whispered in her ear and pressed a tender kiss to her temple. With her left shoulder under Elsie's right armpit, Glenna propelled Elsie into the guest bedroom and gently sat her down on the bed.

Mrs Crawley nodded to herself as she observed Glenna's calm but determined care for her sister. Mrs Murray was well able to take over from here and make sure Mrs Hughes was comfortable. She would go down and prepare Mrs Hughes' medication. "I'm sure you can manage. I'll be downstairs, call me if you need anything," Mrs Crawley said softly, touching Glenna's upper arm to get her attention.

The other woman nodded distractedly, never taking her eyes off her sister. No one existed in the room apart from the two Highland sisters. Elsie's eyes were closed and she was breathing shallowly, obviously trying not to faint. "Elsie?" Glenna inquired quietly. The only answer she got was Elsie leaning into her and burying her face in Glenna's stomach, wrapping her arms around her older sister's waist. "Hush, lassie, you'll be fine," Glenna said, sounding faintly alarmed, while drawing Elsie's face up to look at her properly.

A sleepy smile answered her and Elsie's heavily accented voice drifted up to her, "I know, cause you're here." Her cheek was pressed more tightly against Glenna's stomach and she breathed deeply to inhale her older sister's unique scent, as comforting to her as their mother's had been. In this she was no different as most everybody else; when one is with one's family no matter how old one is, one always reverses back to a child. She trusted her Glenna to take care of her and make everything better.

Tears gathered silently in Glenna's eyes as she looked down on Elsie's bent head. Stroking her hair softly, Glenna knew without the shadow of a doubt that she would do whatever needed to be done to see her sister back to full health and then they would get back in touch with each other – no silly, petty arguments anymore, no misunderstandings. For a long moment the two Hughes women simply stayed in this peaceful moment full of mutual love, trust and understanding, soaking up whatever comfort the other offered and giving it up tenfold. They had come too close to losing each other and both were aware of that fact, but also determined to make the most of the rest of their lives. Slowly, with coordinated movements such as one only sees in siblings, they moved apart and Elsie held up her slightly trembling hands for Glenna to take hold of and pull her to her feet. No words were needed as Glenna helped her undress, carefully undoing each of the tiny buttons on Elsie's blouse. Then both sisters giggled together as their progress was hindered by the waistband of Elsie's skirt.

"Och," huffed Glenna, making a mock-impatient gesture, "turn 'round, Elsie, so we can get you out of those."

Elsie laughed lightly, no sign of the hesitancy or embarrassment that had accompanied the help from both Mrs Crawley and Anna. "I don't know how, but you made that sound quiet risqué," she giggled, her eyes sparking with mischief, but an inner light glimmering in their depths.

Glenna only raised one eyebrow in a very impressive, graceful arch. Somehow she knew that her sister wasn't necessarily referring to her actions or comment, but she knew far better than to ask Elsie outright – better let her little lassie fess up to it in her own good time. Skirt and blouse successfully discarded, Glenna was confronted with Elsie's corset and knit her brows together. It wasn't that she had never helped another woman into or out of one, but she had the distinct feeling that this was wrong. "Why are you wearing your corset, lass?" she asked hesitantly. Through her loss of weight Elsie would have easily fit into her clothes without the aid of her corset cinching in her waist even more or restricting her chest … and that was the other thing. "Why are you torturing yourself after the operation?"

Elsie had the good grace to blush furiously under Glenna's scrutiny. Her eyes were cast down and the nervously bit her lip. "It's proper," she mumbled sheepishly. A blush crept up into her cheeks as she admitted quietly, "It felt comfortable …"

A few seconds ticked by as Glenna stared open-mouthed at Elsie. With a jerky nod she finally agreed with Elsie. Both had been used to wearing a corset during the hottest days of summer or while doing the most demanding work on their parents' farm from an early age on. They were also both too Edwardian to partake easily in the new upcoming age of the brassier the younger women and girls adapted so easily to. For women like them it had become second nature to pull on their corsets and they felt almost incomplete without one. It gave them backbone and had long since become a sort of armour for them. Donning a corset this morning had signalled her recovery to Elsie and she had also felt in need of the extra strengthening from the intricate hooks and laces to face her trying day as a guest of Mrs Crawley – her, a servant being waited on hand and foot by one of the Family. Feeling her older sister's arms wrap around her she knew that Glenna truly understood her. The whispered words only a further confirmation.

"I felt that same," Glenna murmured close to her ear. "After I … I lost my baby, I lost myself for a while." A tear slid down her cheek and into Elsie's hair before a sad smile played around her lips. "Until you waltzed into my house and drug me out of bed, put on my corset and my clothes for me and made me return the world of the living."

"Glenna?" Elsie's voice was barely above a whisper now, her eyes closed and a furrow between her brows. "What does it feel like to nurse a child?"

It was now the older woman's turn to blush in mortification, but she bravely answered her younger sister, choosing her words carefully. "It is a … peculiar sensation. Mhm, sometimes it was right painful when the milk shot in. Most peculiar was that even a sound from either of my children could bring it on. When the bairn suckles … it is …" She was lost for words, her brows coming together, her gaze going inward while her cheeks blazed with red. Very quietly she answered thoughtfully, as if she had never before contemplated any of this, "It's verra different from when my Angus drew … I mean … I … The baby's gums are toothless and it latches on relentlessly, demanding and draining, only letting go when done."

Blushing and blustering, both sisters weren't able to look at each other. Elsie fiddled with her corset, wringing her hands over and over, while Glenna was lost in memories, her gaze inwards and soft. In the end she forcefully shook her head and focussed on Elsie with a rather grim and determined expression.

"Enough stalling, lassie, and off with your corset," she commanded, every inch the older sister once more.

Elsie felt her hackles rise at the unspoken challenge, but acquiesced wordlessly, pressing the busk together to release the hooks. Anna hadn't really tightened the laces in her back this afternoon, so that no pressure was on the still healing incision. Now the garment fell easily away, revealing Elsie's shift and the bandages beneath it. When even those barriers were removed, Elsie's eyes were again piercing the ceiling with their intensity.

It was the first time Glenna saw the tiny incision at the side of Elsie's left breast, causing a sharp inhale of air and a sympathetic wince. She could hardly imagine how scared Elsie must have felt, waiting for the test results and then how alone when she had been informed that the cyst had to be removed. Again she asked herself, why Elsie hadn't confided in someone. In the last few days she had gotten to know most of her sister's co-workers and had realized that they were all very fond of their housekeeper, holding her in high regard and even loving her like a second mother. Mrs Patmore especially had struck Glenna like a formidable ally in whatever trouble her younger sister could get herself in. To stem the same, recurring questions from spilling from her mouth, Glenna drew a deep breath in and steeled herself to attend to her sister. Her fingers were cool on her sister's skin as she carefully applied the antiseptic salve from Dr Clarkson and covered it with a new gauze patch before attempting to wrap a fresh bandage around Elsie's chest. Still hovering over the tray with medical supplies on the nightstand, Glenna had to strain to hear Elsie's timid question. As she turned around she noticed Elsie boring a hole into the ceiling while fighting tears, her hands clenched into tight fists by her sides and tension in every line of her body.

"Is it very noticeable?" she asked almost inaudibly. Bravely levelling her gaze to meet Glenna's wide-open eyes, Elsie pleaded desperately, "Please be honest with me."

To her sister's credit, she didn't bat an eyelid as she replied. "It's a very small incision, lassie, and I believe it will hardly leave a scar." Cocking her head slightly to the side, Glenna's stormy blue eyes pierced her sister and she abandoned her resolve to give Elsie space. This was her own flesh and blood, the only person who truly knew her and vice versa. "Vanity has never been one of your faults, Elsie. What's all this about?"

The younger woman pressed her jaw firmly together and refused to answer, turning away and drawing her arms defensively around herself. She tried to cover herself, but had to admit to herself that it wasn't her nakedness that was bothering her, but instead the vulnerability she felt regarding that particular question. Years had gone by since both sisters had shared confidences easily, as if second nature, both becoming more and more entrapped in their own worlds and drifting apart. Now they were thrown together again by sickness, trying desperately to find their way back to the camaraderie of their youth. Then Elsie recalled the honesty her sister had gifted her with and she decided that she owed it to her sister to at least try for the same honesty herself. "Mr Carson proposed to me," she admitted softly, lighting up from within, a radiant smile spreading across her face at the mere thought about her lovely fiancé. As the words tumbled from her mouth, she felt her cheeks flame and heat break out all over her body. "He said he loves me and that I'm still beautiful to him, but …" She trailed off, lost for words.

When Glenna tried to touch her shoulder and offer more comfort, Elsie whipped around, eyes blazing and tears streaking down her proud cheeks. "I know that I was never a great beauty, but … but Charles thinks I'm pretty. I don't want to disappoint him. What if he looks at me no and find me lacking? Thinks me ugly? I can't bear to think he'll not want me anymore now!" Hot tears fell from her face onto her chest and forearms, as they were still tightly wrapped around herself. She was trembling from head to toe, barely able to stand on her own two feet.

With a ferocity Elsie had never seen in her sister before, Glenna grasped her shoulders and locked her gaze with Elsie. "Listen to me, Elizabeth Cathlyn Hughes," Glenna commanded sternly, giving Elsie a little shake. "You are still the same – the same beautiful highland lass who could turn the head of every lad she set her eyes on. Besides, your Mr Carson doesn't strike me a charming liar, who'd say anything to get under yer skirt. Now I won't hear another word about you being ugly or altered, because you're not. You hear me?"

Elsie nodded mutely. Charles had tried to reassure her in softly spoken words and quiet compliments, but Glenna had gone about it with her typical brisk fashion – never shying away from the brutal truth, almost literally bashing some sense back into her foolish little sister. A shy smile quirked Elsie's lips at the corners and she wordlessly snuggled into her sister's embrace … before the next words registered.

"His eyes will buck out when he sees you on your wedding night"

"GLENNA!" Elsie's scandalized voice rang through the entire room and for a moment she feared it would bring Mrs Crawley onto the scene.

"You asked," Glenna replied defensively, shrugging it off.

They scowled at each other before bursting into gales of laughter. It was liberating to act silly and to laugh without a care in the world – even for just a little while. After that they winked at each other and silently, but completely in sync once again, the sisters commenced on dressing Elsie's wound and getting her ready for bed. Glenna brushed out her hair, like she had done when Elsie was very small, then braided it into a thick plait and helped her into bed.

"Sleep, lass, and don't you worry about a thing. It will right itself," she said softly, brushing her lips across Elsie's forehead as she drew up the blanket around her body, tugging her in snugly.

"Oidhche mhath leat (Good night to you)," Elsie murmured sleepily, her eyes already drifting shut after all the action and emotions today. She reached out and took Glenna's hand in hers, pressing a kiss to the back of her hand before her fingers went slack again. Her head had barely touched the pillow before she drifted off to sleep.

"Slainte mhor agus a h-uile beannachd duibh," Glenna whispered tenderly as she watched her little sister sleep. Good health and every good blessing to you!

oOoOoOo

Elsie was dreaming peacefully while Glenna and Mrs Crawley sat together in the sitting room, enjoying a late cup of tea and reflecting on Elsie's first day in the house.

The baby had not drunk much, but she had fallen asleep, sated for the night. Its tiny, slack mouth fell slowly away from her nipple, rimmed with milk, and the head with glossy dark curls rested heavily against her arm and breast. Rocking back and forth in the rocking chair by the nursery window, she unhurriedly drank in the sight in her arms; the baby's face looked oddly familiar, being a mixture of her own features and Charles and strangely enough also resembling Miss Sybbie's chubby, soft face. She tenderly kissed the round cheek, before carefully laying the precious bundle back in the crib. Heavy breathing told Elsie that her child was peacefully asleep.

"Down for the night, is she?" A voice, that wasn't designed for whispering in the sacred silence of a nursery, drifted to Elsie's ear and she looked up – somehow knowing immediately who had come up behind her. Without another word, Charles came around to her and stood in front of her, his hand stroking over her arm in the process and lightly brushing against her still leaking breast. He must have seen her wince a little for he immediately knelt down in front of her. Without direction from either of them, his hand rose slowly and cupped itself around the swollen curve of her breast. His head bowed, the same dark, glossy curls as the child's again blocking her vision, and his lips fastened softly on her nipple.

Elsie groaned, feeling the half-painful prickle of the milk rushing in once more. She put her hand behind his head and pressed him slightly closer. His mouth was soft, gentle in its pressure. He knelt before her, his mouth a supplicant, and lazily drank from her. Gently his hand cupped around her waist and he drew her forward and up, his mouth never leaving her flesh, as he tenderly lifted her out of the chair and lay her down on the rug beside the crib. Elsie closed her eyes and let the sensation wash over her, wash away all her inhibitions and fears.