First of all, I'd like to start off this chapter by saying HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO BLINDING HORIZON. Or Happy Birthday, since it is the story's one-year birthday. Whatever works for you guys. It has taken a long road to get to this point and I'm so glad that I haven't given up on this story since it really is my favourite one to write. Anyways, this chapter takes place before the Awakening and I hope you guys enjoy it.


Sweet Misery


Another day passed, bring my total of days spent in this wretched place to fifty-six days. That also meant that it had been over a wink since I had met Suki. Thinking about Suki made me nervous, since I hadn't seen her in almost two days after her outburst with the guards. My greatest fear for her was that they would eventually snuff out any resolve or strength that she had left, and I didn't want that for her. I didn't want her to end up as miserable as I was. She didn't deserve that.

Asking around for her had done me no favours, since the guards just spat at me and didn't bother answering my questions, while most of the other prisoners hardly had any idea as to who she was. Strangely enough, I found that I actually missed Suki in the time that she was gone. It was weird being without her, which was weird in it of itself since I had gotten used to being ostracised from anyone and everyone.

Finally, when it came time for my daily exercise time I spotted Suki's familiar hair amongst the crowd. Not too eagerly, I made my way towards her since I didn't want her to think that I missed her or anything, which I didn't. I'd barely known her for a week. That isn't enough time to miss someone.

Luckily for Suki, she didn't appear to have suffered much harm and that made my blood boil. She had practically assaulted a guard and barely seemed to have a scratch. While I had never even made a move out of line to receive the treatment that I got. Suki was an outsider, and she hardly even got the treatment that most outsiders got. What made her so special that she didn't get any physical abuse?

"I see that you're still standing on both legs," I observed as I approached her.

Suki turned to face me, "Yes. My punishment wasn't as bad as I thought it would be."

"What did they do to you?" I asked, since they had to have done something to her.

"I had a lecture from one of the guards before they put me in confinement and in one of those box things. I forget what they're called but it was freezing cold in there the whole time," Suki replied.

"You mean the cooler," I stated as I realised what she was referring to.

Suki nodded, "Yes, that thing. It was freezing in there. I thought I was going to freeze to death!"

I scoffed, "That's what they call it a cooler. And they wouldn't actually let you die. Not on their watch."

"How have you been since… they put me in there?" Suki asked hesitantly.

I shrugged, "Could be worse, could be better. You know I can look after myself without you, right?"

"Sometimes I don't see that," Suki muttered.

Not wanting to get into an argument with her, I simply put some distance between us and went about my normal routine. That seemed to be enough of an indication for Suki, since she left me alone after that. For which I was glad since I didn't really feel like being around her now. I'd expected her to come back battered and bruised, only to have gotten a mere stay in the cooler. If I had that option, I would've spent a whole month in that thing if it meant taking away the beatings that I received.

That was more than enough of an indication for me that I deserved this. Suki didn't, which was why she only got a short stay in the cooler. If I hadn't deserved all of the pain and suffering, they would've just kept me locked up from the beginning. But I did deserve it, unlike Suki, and now I was paying the price for it.

~*•°•*~

There was a strange feeling in the air during the next few days. It was difficult to put my finger on it, but there was just something that I could sense which I didn't like. The guards seemed to be satisfied with whatever that was as they'd been far more harsher to any outsider prisoners or traitors, which was only about a quarter of the prisons population. Even some of the actual prisoners appeared to be happy at whatever had happened, which meant that it had to be something about the war.

The looks I kept on getting was enough indication that something had to have happened. Sometimes it was almost as though they were celebrating about something which was weird, since as far as I was aware prisons didn't celebrate anything. Not even important Fire Nation holidays were a part of the prisons calendar. As much as I wanted to, it was hard to ignore the way some of the guards and prisoners were acting. It only made me want to find out what exactly was going on, but I knew that it wasn't my place to ask.

It soon came time for another one of my cleaning schedules, which found me mopping up the kitchens after the guards had finished their lunch in there. The guards always made sure to leave enough mess behind for us to clean up, except today it seemed like there was more of that than usual, which I put down to whatever had put the guards in the mood that they were in.

In a strange way, mopping was somewhat therapeutic for me. It was hard to explain, but it just felt strangely calming to mop the dirty prison floor. Plus, it helped that the mop made a somewhat useable weapon so if the time ever called for it, I'd use it to my advantage. But the time would never call for it, because there was no way that I was going to risk what little freedom I had just to make a small stand.

Mopping didn't seem to be only therapeutic for me but for others as well, since I could see another girl beside me who was more than happy to do this chore. This wasn't actually the first time that I had seen her, since we often shared similar shifts that made our paths cross. But I had never spoken to her, just like she had never spoken to me. I liked it better that way, since the less people who attached themselves for me, the better it was. Not just for me, but for them as well.

Of course, not everyone seemed to share that thought since the girl happily made her way towards me as we mopped the floor in together. Silence fell over us for a few moments, and I hoped that she wouldn't acknowledge me but of course, that is exactly what happened.

"It's fun, isn't it?" she said.

"What?" I found myself asking before I could stop myself.

"Mopping. I never really liked chores before but since I've come here it gives me a distraction," she replied.

"It helps," I shrugged.

"I'm sure this must be new for you too, considering where you came from," the girl observed.

I raised my eyebrows, "You… know who I am?"

"Almost everyone knows who you are. How could they not, when you're the famed Dragoness who gave up everything that she had to turn traitor," the girl answered.

"In hindsight it wasn't really worth it," I muttered, since sometimes I found myself wondering that very same question. I had given up everything that I had, only to be made a mess of because of it. But at the same time, I'm not really sure if I would undo it given the opportunity.

"If it makes you feel any better, I didn't know who you were before that. Of course, that's mainly because I've been in prison for the last two years. It kind of shuts you off from the outside world," the girl said.

"No kidding," I murmured.

"I guess since I know who you are, it's only fair that you know who I am," the girl stated.

"I'm going to stop you right there. If you knew what was good for you, you'd stay away from me," I interjected.

She didn't seem to take that warning, "My name is Rei and I don't care what those guards say. In my opinion, they're losers."

"Don't let them hear you say that," I suggested.

Rei shrugged, "I've done worse things."

"Like what?" I queried, wondering how someone like her could've ended up in here.

"Let's just say that I'd caused some problems for the Fire Nation government before they threw me in here," Rei replied.

"Like what?" I questioned.

"Nothing that I'd consider serious, but you know what the Fire Nation's like. They don't like it when you get in the way of things. They decided that I was a 'danger to life as they knew it' so they put me in here," Rei answered.

"Who's they?" I wondered.

"It's best you don't know," Rei murmured.

"Like it's best for you to stay away from me," I advised.

Rei chuckled, "Too late for that. I like you, Abby. You're cool and you've got guts. I like that."

"Everyone has guts," I pointed out.

"And a sense of humour too, apparently," Rei murmured.

"I'm just stating the obvious," I argued, since I was. We all have guts, whether you meant literally or figuratively.

"I've also heard that you know how to make a pretty good fight. Fighting hasn't been my thing, since I've always been a non-bender," Rei admitted.

"Am I supposed to feel sorry for you?" I asked.

"Of course not. I'm glad to be a non-bender because it has only made me stronger and fight harder. But I'm still lacking in some parts," Rei said.

"I'm sure you'll brush up on your skills in no time," I murmured.

"I could always use a teacher. And there's not that many people who would want to teach me," Rei propositioned.

I raised my eyebrows, "What are you saying?"

"Would you want to teach me how to fight? I've always wanted to learn from someone like you and I could certainly use that bite around here," Rei said.

"Sorry to disappoint you but I'm no teacher. And you wouldn't want to learn from me," I snapped.

"Why's that? I hear you've had experience," Rei noted.

"It doesn't matter. I'm not worth your time or your energy, so I suggest that you do yourself a favour and act like I don't exist," I advised her.

"It's hard to do that considering you're practically the talk of the prison yard," Rei stated.

"Nothing interesting must happen in this place if all you people can talk about is me," I muttered.

"You are an interesting topic of discussion. It's not everyday someone like you ends up in here. Sure, there's other traitors in this place but none quite like you," Rei observed.

"Aren't all traitors the same?" I asked.

"Not necessarily. Some betray their country, some betray their families or their organisations. You betrayed all of the above," Rei explained.

I scoffed, "I don't have any family."

"Wasn't the man who raised you practically family?" Rei questioned.

My blood boiled at the reference of Daisuke. That man was nothing like family. And he certainly didn't raise me. If anything, he trained me. To be a killer. And I wasn't a killer. Because technically, I had never killed anyone. No matter how much Daisuke had pressured me into doing so. After everything he'd put me through, I refused to acknowledge him like that.

"That man did not raise me and he was not family," I hissed.

Just like that, I turned around and left Rei or whoever she was standing there and walked as fast away as I could. It seemed as though nowadays all I was doing was dealing with confrontation and that was the last thing I needed or wanted to deal with now. All I wanted to do was serve the rest of my sentence in as much peace as I could, but that seemed to be too much to ask.

~*•°•*~

Hours later, I found myself sitting in the cafeteria as I ate my dinner in silence. The looks and behaviour from the guards only continued as the day went on. Sitting in silence, I watched as the other prisoners acted around with one another. Observations could only get you so far, since I couldn't tell what had gotten them to act that way and it was starting to irritate me.

What right did they have to act all happy while I was sitting aside and wasting away in misery? What right did they have that I didn't to not know what was going on? All I wanted was to find out exactly what was going on around here. But considering my status amongst the prisoners I figured that I'd be stuck in the dark like this for the rest of my everlasting stay.

Eventually, I was joined by someone else but they didn't acknowledge me as they just sat down. I didn't even bother to look up at who it was since it obviously wasn't anyone important. But when I heard what sounded like tears coming from that person, I turned to see who it was. To my surprise, it was Suki. Figures that it would be her, since nobody else would think to come close to me like this. But what I didn't understand was why she was crying.

"What's with the tears?" I asked.

"It's bad, Abby. Really bad," Suki cried.

"What is it?" I insisted.

Suki sighed, "It's over. We've lost."

I raised my eyes, "What do you mean we've lost?"

"The Avatar is dead and Ba Sing Se has fallen," Suki replied.

Shock swept over me at Suki's revelation. The Avatar… dead? As much as I thought it would happen eventually I didn't actually think that it would happen. Without the Avatar, the world was doomed. Doomed to be forced under Ozai's rule until the man got was coming for him. But nothing would change after that, since Azula would take charge and I couldn't even imagine what she would do to the world.

"How?" I questioned.

Suki sighed, "It's all my fault. I let this happen."

"It's not your fault. How could you let that happen when you're in here?" I wondered, genuinely confused.

"Azula snuck into Ba Sing Se disguised as the Kyoshi Warriors with her little friends. Aang went to stop her… But it was for nothing. Prince Zuko killed him!" Suki hissed.

Another wave of shock swept through me. Prince Hothead actually killed him? Part of me didn't believe that, since he had never once made it seem like he actually wanted the kid dead. It was always about capturing him and taking the kid home as a prize to his daddy. Plus, Hothead didn't really seem like the murdering type, unlike his sister.

I shook my head, "I don't buy it."

"It's true. It's the word on the prison yard. Everyone's been talking about it. Apparently his banishments been revoked and he'll be returning home as a hero like he actually did something right!" Suki exclaimed.

"Still don't buy it. Prince Hothead never seemed like the murdering type. All he ever wanted to do was capture the kid, not kill him," I explained.

"Well he took that a step further," Suki muttered bitterly. "Now there's no hope for us at all! With that evil princess and her manic father in charge we're condemned to spend the rest of our lives in here."

"What about your Loverboy?" I asked.

"He can only do so much. Without Aang… There's hardly anything that he can do. Nobody's safe anymore," Suki replied.

"Nobody ever was safe," I stated.

Suki sat up straight, "But I can't give up on Sokka. I have to keep believing that Sokka will come for me eventually. Maybe even you, too. So we can both escape."

"Don't get your hopes up, sweetheart. There's nothing to hope on. Not anymore," I muttered as I stood up and left the cafeteria, my own words echoing through my mind.

It was true, there was nothing to hope for anymore. Not now that the Avatar was dead. Any small fragment of hope that I may have had was truly snuffed out. Without the Avatar, there truly was no way for me to get out of this prison. Escaping wasn't an option and I doubted that I'd be let out anytime soon. Part of me had actually believed that there was hope but now I knew that there was none, and that exactly what happened every time I got my hopes up.

As I strolled down the walkway with my arms crossed and my head down low, I noticed several guards not too far away from me. Since the last thing I wanted to deal with was any ridicule from them, I just turned the other way in the hopes of returning to my cell. But they seemed to have the idea of following me as their footsteps only became closer until I felt myself yanked back by my collar.

"Well, well, well. Look what we have here," one of them drawled.

"Thought you'd like to know that as of a few days ago, we've won. This world is ours and it makes what you did pointless," the second one mocked me.

"It must suck, to know that you gave up everything for nothing. Now you have to spend the rest of your life with us, and we'll make sure you know why," the third one smirked in a way that so badly made me want to smack it off his face, but I knew that I couldn't do that.

"You should've known that you were fighting a lost cause, since it was only inevitable that the Fire Nation would reign supreme," the second one gloated.

"Enjoy the rest of your life in here, you treacherous scum. Because there's no way out for you," the first one spat.

Not even bothering to fight back, I simply just stood there and let them shove my roughly against the wall before leaving me to myself. That had all but confirmed what Suki had just told me; the Fire Nation had won and there was no way out for us. From this point on, things were only going to get even more harder for us. What could we expect, when one of us is a traitor and the other is an outsider? This is our life now.

This was officially the worst that I had felt since I got in this Agni forsaken place, and that's saying something considering I've had some pretty low points up until now. It was hard to compare what this feeling felt like, but it was definitely worse than anything that I had ever experienced, knowing that there truly was no way out for me. Not wanting to stand here and wallow in my own self-pity, I headed off towards my cell to hopefully have some of my own time to myself where I could wallow in self-pity in peace.

~*•°•*~

For the next few hours, I refused to come out of my cell. Not even for my scheduled dinner meal. Dinner wasn't going to make me feel better considering how I felt now. I don't think that there was anything that could've made me feel better. It was ironic, that the worst day of my sentence was when I hardly received punishment for anything. But I'd consider the news that I just got and how I got it another form of punishment.

Just when I thought that nothing could get worse in this wretched place, everything just blew up in my face. Everything that I had given up now seemed pointless since it had all been for nothing. The Avatar had lost. The Fire Nation had won. What more was there for me to do except sit here and wait out my sentence in peace? As much as I didn't want to be here, there really was nothing left for me outside of the Boiling Rock. This was all I had.

A knock on my door snapped me out of my thoughts and I looked up as I waited to see who it was. Knowing that there was no point in saying 'come in' or anything like that since they always did that on their own terms, I just sat there. To my surprise, it was Ming who entered my cell. I hadn't seen her in a few days and I was starting to think that she had given up on me, which would be smart for her. I wasn't worth her effort.

"Hello, Abby," Ming greeted me sombrely.

"Hello," I murmured.

"I'm sure that by now you've heard what's happened in the Earth Kingdom," Ming said.

I sighed, "Yes. The War is over and the Fire Nation has won."

"Yes, we have. As I'm sure you're aware, the Fire Nation Capital City Prison holds some of the nations most important criminals. They're about to receive a new arrival which means that security at the prison has to be tightened. A few of the Boiling Rock's guards have been transferred there," Ming explained.

Understanding swept over me as I realised where Ming was going with this. There would be no point in telling me this if it didn't pertain to any of us, which it did. It didn't take me long to realise that Ming was referring to herself, and that she was one of the few who were being transferred.

"You're leaving," I stated.

Ming lowered her head, "As much as I don't want to, I have been given direct orders from the Warden to leave with the other transfers. We'll be guarding the Capital City Prison instead of the Boiling Rock. You have no idea how much I wish that I could stay and be here with you when you need me, but there is nothing that I can do. I have no choice but to follow orders."

I shrugged, "Don't go feeling sorry for me now. Orders are orders and you have to do them, regardless if you want to or not. And look on the bright side, at least now you won't have to deal with me."

"But I like dealing with you as you put it. And I don't want to leave you here to suffer at the hands of the other guards. I wish that there was something I could do for you and for both of us, but my hands are tied," Ming admitted.

"Like I said, don't feel sorry for me. I never wanted your pity or sympathy anyways. Go off and do your new job. Don't make me stop you," I insisted.

"That's all you have to say?" Ming sputtered.

"What do you want me to do? Beg you to try and stay when I know that it's not possible? There is nothing else for me to do or say to you. So just do what you've been told to do and go. Don't be like me and disobey your orders. You've seen the result," I said.

Ming sighed, "Abby, I wish that it didn't have to be like this. But you are right in the sense that I have to follow orders. This will probably be the last time that we see each other and I just want to wish you good luck and remind you that you can get through this. You just have to keep fighting."

"Go," I hissed, pointing at the door.

"If you insist," Ming murmured before turning around and heading for the door. "Goodbye, Abby. I meant what I said."

Once Ming had shut the door and I was sure that there was nobody around to bother me, I lowered my head in shame as the reality of Ming's words sunk in. She was leaving. Not only the Boiling Rock, but me too. That came as no surprise for me, since everybody who ends up in my life always leaves me at some point. As much as I knew I couldn't blame Ming for leaving, I hated her for just leaving me without a fight. If I really mattered that much to her, she would've tried harder to stay. But she didn't.

That was even more of an indication for me to realise that there truly was nobody out there who genuinely cared about me. Not that I could blame the rest of the world for discarding me, since it was just so easy for them to do. Without me in the way, everything was so much easier for everyone else. And that was the realisation that hurt the most.


Yeah, so Ming's gone and Abby's back in her miserable mood again. I know that this update was a bit late, but I couldn't bare to wait another week for it considering the stories birthday/anniversary. I'm not sure if I will get another update in on time next week, but I'll try my best. Until then, please let me know what you guys think and I'll get back to you in the next chapter.

Rei is a Japanese name that means bell.

SPECIAL MENTIONS

Arwen347: Luckily for Suki, she only got away with spending some time in the cooler which Abby clearly wishes that she'd got instead. And I wouldn't necessarily call Abby and Suki 'friends' since in order for that to be the case they both have to think that way, which Abby clearly doesn't. But we'll see how that develops in time.

Revenant12: It's reviews like this that really mean a lot to me, so thank you for taking the time to read my crazy story and leave me with your thoughts. Abby is definitely a complex character which is what makes her so fun to write, especially since it's like I'm writing myself into the story (since I did name her after me lol). When planning the story, I wanted to take a different approach than most stories do and I don't think that I've ever come across a story where the protagonist is actually the antagonist. As for a spin on the comics, you'll just have to wait and see but I do have plans for her beyond the War and the Fire Nation.

Reading Reviewer: As I've previously mentioned, this is the longest that I've lasted with a story without giving up on it and I'm so glad that I haven't done that with this one since it is so fun to write. I do enjoy writing Abby with Suki, since they come from very different walks of life yet they can't help but bond over their similar situations. You've probably already seen that Suki turned out just fine, but I do have more plans of her with Abby in the future so stay tuned for that.