You guys are amazing. Seriously. It amazes me the number of people who are just now finding this fic and reading all 50+ chapters in one sitting. I literally get new alerts every day and that just blows me away. So thank you so much to all of you and welcome to all of my new(er) readers!


Head Case

Castle's thoughts were still firmly entrenched in spinning and re-spinning the words for a perfect proposal (he already had it planned but suddenly it didn't seem good enough) when Kate finally broke the silence. Her voice was quiet and tender, because how could it be anything but when he was sitting there stroking her ring finger quite clearly lost in the fantasy of marrying her?

"Castle."

"Huh?"

She trapped his wandering digits between her own, and that motion seemed to drag him back into awareness as he consciously took stock of what he was doing. But the soft smile on her face, the depth of emotion swimming through her eyes, told him all he needed to know.

She was ready.

He really needed a plan.

"Want to keep reading?" she asked after a bit, and it took him a moment to catch up to her train of thought. She lifted the journal with her free hand, drew his attention to the pages.

"Oh, right, sure," Castle responded haphazardly, scrambling to pull himself together. For goodness sake, he wasn't actually proposing right now. There was no need to be so nervous. At least, that's what he kept telling himself, repeating the mantra over and over in his head. There would be time to plan everything later. Right now, Kate was curled in his lap, her eyes and smile and entire figure radiating with love and adoration, and that was the salient point of focus.

She was here and she wanted to read more of his words, of their story.

"Rick," she cooed, loosening their hand hold to reach up and cup his jaw. "You okay?"

He smiled, eyes clearer and much more focused now. "Yeah, of course."

He still seemed to be flailing but Kate let it drop, smiled and nodded before leaning in to press a kiss to his cheek.

"Let's read," he breathed against her as she pulled away.

Dear Kate,

I think I can officially say that this was the most bizarre case I've ever worked. I'm guessing you can say the same. Just when I think things can't get any weirder, we stumble across frozen people and missing heads. Hell, I make stuff up for a living and even I didn't see most of that coming.

I mean, her story was sweet... in a twisted, disturbing, creepy kind of way. I understand where she's coming from, wanting more time with the man she loved. Who doesn't want that? But I don't think I'd want to be cryogenically frozen to accomplish it. Besides, there's no proof it would even work, and then where would I be? Iced over in some giant frozen cylinder, preserved for all eternity?

No thank you.

(Especially if I would end up looking wide-eyed and bluish like everyone else was. It would completely destroy my handsome image.)

Kate snorted and rolled her eyes but wisely said nothing.

But I digress.

I love you, Kate. I always will. I can say that with absolute certainty. Do I wish we had more time together, no matter what the state of our partnership? Absolutely. Hell, I wish we could actually be together, but working side by side every day is better than nothing. At least I still get to see you, spend time with you.

But regardless of how much or little time we have – or will have – with each other, I think I'd rather enjoy it in this lifetime rather than in some unknown future. I'd rather enjoy it in the time I've been given.

And it's like you said; if you had more time, you might end up wasting it. At first, I mentally scoffed at that, but the more I think about it, the more I realize you're probably right. If I thought I had another lifetime ahead of me, I might pass up too many opportunities in this one. I've learned from you how precious time can be, so I also think I'll take your advice and not get the implants. As much as I'd like to spend the rest of my life being ruggedly handsome, I guess I can handle aging all along with the rest of humanity.

As long as you're growing older right beside me.

(By the way, did you even realize that you said that? You basically agreed that I'd still be in your life ten years from now?)

"I did?" Kate asked, interrupting their reading.

He nodded, still able to clearly recall that moment. "You did."

"Huh," she mused thoughtfully. "Didn't even realize that."

"Or maybe you did and just didn't want it to be known."

She rolled her eyes. "Right."

"Admit it, Detective," Castle said, and the way her title rolled off his tongue was far, far too sexy. "You knew."

Kate swatted his chest lovingly, tilted her head back down to read the letter, hair falling to frame the sides of her face, blocking the smile that was lifting the corners of her mouth.

But Castle seemed to know anyway and he couldn't pass up the opportunity to tease. "You're smiling right now, aren't you? Because I'm right and you know it, you just don't want to admit it."

She offered no verbal reply, but the twitch of her jaw was all the answer he needed. He smirked to himself but followed her lead, bit his tongue and continued to read.

I have to say, you were just a constant surprise during this case. For example, believing in their love story, in beating the odds. Where did that come from? I quite clearly recall you saying last year that you didn't believe in fate and magic and all of that stuff. But if you believe in them beating the odds, then it follows that something has changed. I'm glad it has, because there's so much beauty in magic.

Someday, I hope to show you that on a more personal level. Someday, I hope we can live that reality. You and me. After all, beating the odds is kind of our specialty, right?

It only seems right that eventually we'll have our shot at forever.

(Well, forever in this lifetime.)

I love you.

Rick

"Looks like your wish came true," Kate murmured as she finished reading.

"Hmmm?"

She dropped her eyes to the page, traced the words with her finger. "Beating the odds. We're doing it, aren't we?"

They had. They really had. The world had thrown just about everything in their direction; crazy serial killers, bombs, ex-wives, motorcycle-riding doctor boyfriends, bullets, snipers, conspiracies. And yet they'd made it through all of it relatively unscathed. There were scars, of course, visible and otherwise. But wounds could heal.

Especially when they had each other.

Castle smiled broadly, held her to him tightly and buried his nose in her hair in agreement. "Absolutely."


Thoughts?