~Author's Note: Good Morning! Here is the new chapter...late...I know...Anyway, I needed to write a moment between Maggie and Beth. If you read my other Beth and Daryl fic, you know that I am kinda hating Maggie right now in the TV series for not caring about Beth, and I am not having a problem conveying that hatred in my other work. Since this storyline is clearly different, I am trying to be more fair with Maggie. So, Beth finally has a sister to talk to, and Maggie is a little unsure about how she feels in regards to the Beth and Daryl situation so there might be more Maggie/Beth moments and at least one Maggie/Daryl moment in the future, but she is trying to be supportive while fighting her protectiveness of her sister and her mixed feelings. Also...there's some Carol in this chapter. We'll see how that goes! I know this isn't the greatest chapter, but I really felt that there needed to be some more interaction between Beth and Daryl and the other characters and some reactions from them in regards to Daryl and Beth's relationship. As always, thanks for reading.~
Beth nibbled on a small piece of cold chicken from the plate beside her. Sitting on the floor, back against the bed, knees drawn up, it felt like the first time she'd had a chance to breathe. Maggie brought her the food, and now she was standing beside the bed watching Daryl sleep. Maggie was here, and Maggie knew. Beth didn't have to hide anymore...she could actually talk to her sister about anything...everything.
"He looks like a kid when he's sleeping..." Maggie observed, whispering. Beth smiled.
"You never noticed that?"
"Never got close enough. I didn't want to wake him up...can you imagine waking Daryl up?" Beth looked up at Maggie's absurd statement, her sister glancing down at her. "Well, yeah...I guess you can. And I guess I know why you looked so tired this morning.
Maggie sank down on the floor beside her, wrapping her arms around her knees.
"Why are you on the floor?" She was still whispering.
"You don't have to whisper. Bob had me give him something for the pain and something to make him sleep. He's out." Beth used a quiet tone, but there wasn't any need for whispers.
"Why are you on the floor?"
She had to think about it for a second. It was probably really irrational. She knew that right now she couldn't wake Daryl up or hurt him just by sitting on the bed beside him, but she didn't want to take the chance. Still, she wanted to be as close to him as possible.
"Do you remember the big Weeping Willow back home?" Beth asked thoughtfully.
"Uh, yeah, of course. The one where Dad could never find us."
Beth nodded, thinking about her dream...Daryl, the children, the place where she'd grown up. That was a night they shouldn't have survived, but they did. They beat the odds.
"Dad...you remember...he used to crawl on his hands and knees when he finally found us? I don't know how he did it. He was old even when we were young." Maggie's voice was filled with nostalgia.
The good memories, even though they made your heart sore, they were what kept you going...and what kept the departed alive.
"We used to talk under that willow. Even after you were too old and left, I used to go under there and write in my journal or just think. Maybe I just needed a moment like that," Beth explained, taking a bite from half a biscuit. She wasn't hungry, but she knew she had to eat. Maggie took her hand unexpectedly.
"I missed you, Beth."
"I'm here now..." Beth couldn't help thinking that Maggie might miss her again.
No one knew where life was going to lead, but one certainty was she was going with Daryl, whenever, wherever he went.
"So...how'd it happen...so quick...you and Daryl?" She hesitated in asking.
Maggie never hesitated about asking her anything. Maybe it was because of all the tension that surrounded everyone finding out about them.
"I don't know...it just happened..." Maggie was running her finger over the wings of her wedding ring. Beth felt proud. "How did it happen for you and Glenn?" Beth knew how that had played out. She wasn't stupid or that naive, and that had been super quick.
"I sure hope that's not how it happened...my baby sister..." Maggie's smile was a little sad, but her eyes sparkled.
Even though she knew, Beth felt a little embarrassed thinking of how Maggie and Glenn got together...and Maggie even thinking that was how she and Daryl started...if only she knew just how innocent their relationship really was.
"When we ran...I don't know...I'm not really sure when I started to feel. I know that he saved me...I know when he first kissed me...when..." She was getting all flustered, couldn't get her words out. She sounded like an idiot.
Maggie got her serious face on.
"Was it before...before we lost the prison?"
Why would Maggie even ask her that? But Beth had to think...and there was something...something small.
"I don't know, maybe...I..." she stopped, trying to pull it together. This was her sister. Why was it so damned hard? Breathe. "The night Zack died, Daryl came to tell me..."
"I know. I remember. Glenn told me that Daryl was going to you."
"He was sad. I hugged him, and he didn't pull away. He kinda hugged back, and I was the one who let go. Maybe I felt something...maybe I felt him..."
Maggie raised an eyebrow, Beth realizing what she'd said.
"Stop...I mean...maybe I felt something different about him." Why was everyone so interested in her sex life? "But after that, there was never time to think about it again. Even when we ran, things between us...they were rough...bad...until they weren't."
"So, what's Daryl like? I've always wondered...I mean, how could you not?"
"Maggie!" Beth knew she was rosy red now. She prayed Daryl didn't wake up to this conversation.
"What? I'm your sister. I've earned the right to ask." There was no shame in her voice. "And I'm sure he's not like Zack...not at all."
Maggie was her sister. She could talk to Maggie. She hadn't been ready to talk to her...seek out sisterly advice before the turn, but now she was here, and Beth could use some.
"I didn't sleep with Zack...I didn't know him that long...long enough to..."
"Oh...I must've been living in another world. I just assumed."
"It's okay. We all had our own lives. My relationships weren't your top priority, even before the turn. To be truthful, he wasn't even my priority, and Zack deserved better than that." Beth was a different person then, had a totally different outlook on life and loss...and she hadn't been in love.
"I'm sorry...I didn't mean to bring up Zack...upset you."
"No...it's not that..."
"You didn't sleep with Jimmy though?" Maggie didn't give her time to explain what she needed to. Maybe Maggie was working it out in her mind. It sounded like she just realized.
Beth shook her head.
"So...Daryl...he was your first?" Maggie was hesitant in asking, sounded concerned. Why concerned?
"We haven't yet...we haven't had the chance...we'll, we've had the chance...but not the right chance." Did that even make sense?
"You're still a virgin?" Maggie confirmed.
"Yeah."
"Well, good luck with Daryl." She rubbed her face with her palm, going all cynical.
"What does that even mean?" Beth didn't understand the shift in Maggie's mood.
"It's Daryl..."
Beth was starting to feel defensive...protective of Daryl. Why was Maggie so pessimistic? And that was a cop out. It's Daryl. She'd heard that so many times, and now she realized it was nothing more than a judgment...a very stereotypical judgment.
"It's Daryl?" She asked defensively, waiting for Maggie to explain beyond the stereotype.
"Yeah...it just that, he's...a survivor... his life's violent, he's aggressive...and his life was like that even before everything fell apart," Maggie seemed like she was trying to tread carefully since Beth went defensive. "It kinda seems like he'd be rough in bed. The first time is hard enough as it is, so that isn't something that would make it easier."
Well, this wasn't going how she'd hoped.
"Maggie...I'm kinda scared...and..."
"I'd be scared too. Do you really know what you're getting into?" Maggie was dead serious...didn't even give her a chance to finish.
Beth realized at this point, she was better off going it alone, going in blind. A sister's advice wasn't any good if Maggie was just going to judge Daryl and not even listen to what she needed, making her more scared than she already was. Daryl had been right. People in their group did judge him.
"Maybe if you'd been with someone else first, I'd say go for it...but as it is...I don't know...You're my baby sister. I don't want you hurt..." Maggie was being softer in this approach, but it still broke her heart. She clearly didn't understand...didn't understand that they'd decided to be together, decided to get married...what feelings had to be there for those things to happen.
"Never mind Maggie..." Beth started to push herself off the floor. "I just thought I could talk to you...needed to talk to my sister..."
She was feeling a little bit emotional now. Even though her sister was there, she still really wasn't. But Maggie caught her arm before she could get off the floor.
"Wait...Beth, you can talk to me..."
Beth sat back down beside her hoping this round would go better. If not, she was done. It wasn't worth it.
"I'm not scared because I'm scared of Daryl. I'm just scared of it..." Beth was a little bit scared of Daryl, but she wasn't going to let Maggie know that. It wasn't that she didn't think Daryl was going to try to be gentle with her...but what if he couldn't?
There were a few moments of silence. Beth watched Maggie contemplating, thinking.
"Okay. How far have you gone?"
This was where it got awkward.
"We've touched..." and she was feeling flushed already.
"God Beth, I'm gonna need more details than that."
Why? "Daryl and I...we've been naked...touched...we both..."
Maggie was smiling now, shaking her head, taking a certain amount of pleasure in her embarrassment.
"Well, that was a good start, if you both..."
"Maggie, stop...you're just being mean now..."
"Innocent little Beth," Maggie reached out, hugging her. "My sweet baby sister. I wasn't being mean, just truthful. I meant that it was good that you..." she paused and Beth knew she was trying to find a way to say it without embarrassing her, "enjoyed the experience." Beth was feeling better knowing that Maggie wasn't teasing her. "Is that as far as you've gone?"
"Yeah...well, he offered to...no...he tried to..." she just needed to buck up, be real, and say it. "Daryl tried to go down on me." The words came out quickly, but once they were out, Beth felt better.
"And?"
"I said no."
Maggie looked at her dumbfounded. "Why?"
"I don't know...it's just not what I wanted with him." The only thing Beth could do was be truthful.
Her sister accepted that truth, nodding.
"So, what was he like?"
It was the second time Maggie was asking this, but now there was actual context...Maggie was trying to help her, not just asserting her rights as her older sister to torture her.
"I don't have anything to compare him to...but, it was good..." It was getting easier to open up.
"No, I mean, how was he with you? How did he treat you?" Maggie wanted details.
"He was slow...gentle...really hesitant..." Beth was remembering the moments...they were so vivid. She could still feel his touch, taste his lips...which was not really helping her situation.
"Really?" Why did Maggie sound so skeptical. Maybe Beth should be worried.
But that wasn't Daryl...he'd never hurt her on purpose, but Maggie didn't know that. She hadn't been through what they had been through together...or shared the sweetness they had shared.
"Maggie...I just don't know what to do...you know...actually what I should do when..." Beth just needed something.
"Do you love him?" Maggie was watching her intently, waiting to assess her answer.
"More than anything."
"I never thought I'd hear Daryl say he loved anyone, and...well, he kinda told us in a big way today, so I'll give him credit for that." Beth wasn't really sure at this point if Maggie had something against Daryl or if she was just being protective.
"He doesn't need you to give him credit. I love him...he's different with me."
"Okay, Beth." She gave in. "About what to do, Daryl's got that handled. I'm sure he's got a lot of experience under his belt, been there done that, and that's good."
Beth was still waiting for something more concrete. Maggie saw that.
"Don't rush. A lot of it comes natural...you can't really do anything wrong. Don't be afraid to tell him to slow down or be gentler. Guys tend to have different ideas about what slow and gentle are. And guys like Daryl..." Maggie stopped there. Whatever she was going to say, she thought better of, and it was lost. Beth should probably be grateful.
Maggie paused for a minute, reaching out, brushing the hair out of Beth's eyes, and touching her cheek gently. Beth had forgotten what it was like to have a sister.
"Remember, this isn't some hookup in the backseat of a car. If you love him, and he loves you, you share everything that you're feeling...pain, pleasure...that's what a relationship...what sex is all about...being together." Maggie finally said something that made sense. Something that was beautiful and good.
"And it's going to hurt...a lot..." Beth knew she would just feel better going in prepared.
"Maybe...I don't know...I can't really say. It's different for everybody. It depends on a lot."
Once again, not helping, and Maggie read that fear on her face.
"You'll be sore, but after the first few times, it won't hurt anymore. Daryl knows that. He's not going to do anything to hurt you on purpose." Maggie reassured her with the truth. She put a comforting arm around her, pulling her close. "He loves you Beth. You'll be fine. Put you're faith in Daryl."
Beth didn't really know if Maggie believed that last part, but she did...she loved him and trusted him. Somehow, that made everything better. That was all Beth needed to hear.
His head was pounding the beat of a war drum before he even opened his eyes. Daryl forced 'em open, not really sure where the pain was coming from or what the hell was going on. The curtains were drawn tight over the windows and the lights were out, a little bit of the fading light from the outside was peeking through the edges of the heavy material. Why was he awake if there was so much pain...his body wanted him to sleep. He reached out for Beth beside him, but she wasn't there. This was the second time in the short span since everyone was reunited that he'd been in bed without Beth. This shit wasn't gonna fly...they just couldn't have her whenever they wanted her. She had her own life...she belonged beside him.
That was when Daryl realized just how possessive he was starting to get and the reason he was in so much pain...other people...their group, their family...others. And why he was awake...someone pounding...well, it was just knocking, but it felt like pounding in his head...on the door. It sure in the hell wasn't Beth. She would just come in. Anyone else...he just wanted them to go away. But they didn't; they just opened the door.
"Let's get some light in here."
The lights flipped on, instinct drove him to sit up...quickly...too quickly for the wound in his side.
"Son of a bitch..." Daryl put pressure against the bandage, laying back down. "What the fuck?"
"Take it easy there." Carol was cheery as hell. He didn't have the patience to care, laying still, waiting for the pain to fade. "I've never seen you waking up so angry. You were always such a morning person."
Daryl thought on it, trying to figure out when Carol saw him wake up. She'd been around him in the group in the mornings, even at the prison, but never when he was waking up. He was always up before most everyone else.
Hurt like hell, he thought it, but there was no way he was sayin' it to her.
"Wake up, Beth's gone, ain't gonna be happy 'bout that. Ain't morning neither..." Daryl looked back towards the window, trying to figure out what time it was. He didn't even know what day it was...when the fight happened.
"Well, you're in luck. I've got some nice chicken noodle soup here for you. Straight from the can, just like mom used to make." She set the try on the bedside table, Daryl drawing the covers closer.
"Just like mom," he replied bitterly.
Carol perched herself on the side of be bed, grabbing the bowl and spoon.
"What in the hell are you doin'?" Daryl moved further away, wincing.
"Making sure you eat."
"I ain't hungry."
"You need food to heal," Carol insisted.
"You ain't my mom."
"I should hope not."
This tit for tat with her wasn't helping his head none. Carol's eyes were on him, watching him. She caught him when his hand went to his side as he tried to straighten.
"You want me to take a look at that?" She offered, setting the bowl aside.
"Naw, I'm fine. Stitches are just good and tight," Daryl turned her down gently. There was no reason to bark at her. She was just tryin' to be nice.
"You need to let me look." Carol reached out for his blanket.
"No." Apparently the civil approach wasn't working.
Carol let it be, but there was something else on her mind.
"I thought we could talk to. You haven't had any time..." So, she didn't just come to play nurse. She wanted to trap him and make him listen whether he wanted to or not.
"Still don't," Daryl cut her off.
Whatever catching up Carol wanted to do, well, he just wasn't in the mood, but she was gonna get it out no matter what.
"I thought you should know, hear it from me before anyone else mentioned it...I killed Karen and David back at the prison."
Daryl didn't have a big reaction to the confession because he already knew...had known for a long time...long enough that he'd formed his opinion but stopped worrying about it because it had just been him and Beth. Once Carol showed back up on scene, he knew he had to be more guarded though. The thing was, Carol...she didn't seem at all affected by what she'd done. Most of the time, when you did something you regretted, you had to bury it inside to get on with your life...but when you had to talk about it...that's when people knew how you really felt. Carol didn't feel.
"I know." Maybe that would stop the conversation.
"Rick...I knew he told you...after I saw you coming back from the basement and you brushed me off when I tried to talk to you before all this happened," Carol gestured to his side and head. "I didn't want it to be between us without you hearing my side of the story."
"There ain't two sides. You killed 'em. You said it yourself." Cold, hard reality. She'd killed...no matter how she tried to justify it, it had been wrong.
"I wanted to come back...get the girls..." She broke off after mentioning Lizzie and Mika. They weren't with the group, so he knew they didn't make it. Maybe she still felt something. "And I was at least going to say goodbye to you."
"Rick told me he promised you we were gonna take care of the girls at the prison. We were gettin' ready to go tell Tyreese the truth when the Governor rolled up and the shit hit the fan." Daryl couldn't say why he said so much, but Carol needed to know that he knew the truth all along...he hadn't just heard it.
"You knew at the prison?" Carol seemed a bit thrown.
"Yup."
"You agreed with Rick's call?"
"I didn't have to agree with it. It was Rick's call. Glad it wasn't mine. Don't know what I would've done." And Daryl wasn't sure, honest to God truth.
Carol didn't just kill, she covered and lied...lied to everyone...even him. That lie changed things. He'd also made a certain promise to Tyreese about putting a bolt in the killers once they found 'em. He wouldn't have killed Carol, but he couldn't have said he would've made a different choice than Rick, but since he'd been Carol's friend, the cut would've been all the deeper for her.
"What happened...you know, I had to. Somebody had to do something or everybody was going to die." Is that what she had to tell herself so she could sleep at night, or did she really believe it?
"Yeah, well, I did something. Got the meds, and people lived. Didn't have to kill no one." Daryl did the right thing. Carol did the easy thing. The right things were never easy.
"I did what I thought was right, what I thought would save the group," Carol pleaded her case. "You've done things to save us...Rick has to." Was that where she was coming from, thought he and Rick would've done the same thing?
Daryl didn't have a response for that. Carol looked away from him, staring straight ahead, face void of emotion.
"Rick forgave me. Tyreese forgave me. That means you need to forgive me too."
Was she tryin' to tell him what to do...what to think? She'd done that before, he hated it...
"It ain't about forgiving. Ain't my place to forgive. It's about trust. And I got Beth now..." Daryl had Beth. He loved Beth, and he couldn't trust Carol. It was their new reality. "Where's Beth?"
He was distracted in that moment...thinking about her. Why hadn't Beth brought him his food? Why Carol?
"Poor thing. She fell asleep on the couch exhausted. Beth...she's so young...she could be my daughter. She's probably not old enough...not ready to handle everything she's facing...everything she has to do..." Daryl didn't like where this was goin'.
"Beth's tough. Are any of us really ready to handle the world?" He wasn't gonna put up with anyone doubting.
"That's not what I meant...but you must be relieved. The group's back together so you don't have to bear the burden of protecting her."
Did Carol not hear anything he said about being with Beth, what he told the whole group.
"That ain't it. We're together. She's not a burden. Truth is, she saved me..."
Carol's head moved up and down. It was kinda a nod, but the wheels in her head were still turning.
"Is Beth pregnant?" Carol's voice spoke with sympathy...sympathy was the wrong sentiment if that had been the case.
"Pfft...no." It wasn't any of her business, but he didn't need anyone thinkin' that, questioning his motives, or the sincerity of his feelings for Beth.
"Then why say you're married? What does it matter? You don't have to do that to protect her anymore?"
Daryl wasn't understanding what was happening; why all the questions, all the doubts from her? He'd worried about meeting some resistance in the group, being judged, questioned, but not from Carol. They were apparently living in two different worlds.
"Because we are. I love her, and for once in my life I wanted to do something the right way, not just for her, but for me." Despite the pain, the splitting headache, and Beth not being near him, he felt a smile creep across his lips, and he was warm inside. He loved her. He married her. They were together. They belonged to each other, and nothing else mattered.
"Things are probably going to change now since the group's back together. I know that we all went through a lot, and sometimes we bond with people we go through tragedies with...look what happened to us...with Sophia...but that doesn't mean it's love...it doesn't mean it's forever..."
"Carol..." It needed to stop.
"No, you need to be realistic. You were there for each other when you both needed someone. Now someone's going to get hurt, and I don't want that to happen."
"That's not how it is...never was..."
"This isn't you, Daryl." Her eyes were on him now, like she thought she could see into his soul...but she knew nothing...the only person who could do that was Beth.
Daryl almost snapped. He was done, but then there was Beth standing in the doorway. She was a sight. Hair mussed, sleepy eyes...so pretty. Daryl just wished Beth looked like that because of him. Well, to be fair, she probably was tired because of him, but not for the right reasons. But with Beth standing in that door...nothing else mattered. His anger melted away...he couldn't take his eyes off her.
"For the first time in my life, I know who I am...when I'm with her." He didn't say it for Beth's benefit; he said it 'cause it was true.
That was when Carol realized he was looking right through her...it wasn't their conversation anymore. When she looked back and saw Beth, she jumped up from where she sat at the edge of the bed like she was guilty of something...and she was...killing, prying, meddling, doubting. She was guilty of plenty. If Beth had a jealous bone in her body, she didn't show it. She was so full of grace, stepping aside, letting Carol retreat out the door.
Beth...
Finally, something good. Something he wanted. He tried to sit up. He was going to get up and go to her...but he fucking needed to remember to go slow. Daryl's forehead scrunched in pain, then the fucking cut in his forehead hurt from scrunching it.
Damned if you do, damned if you don't.
"Daryl, lay down." Her words were firm.
He did what she said, not just because she said it, but because he needed to.
"I ain't used to people tellin' me what to do." It came out crankier than he thought it would, but she didn't seem phased by it.
"Well, maybe you should get used to it until you get better. You should be sleeping," Beth told him how it was, drawing the covers back.
"I was tryin'. Didn't wake up 'cause I wanted to." Daryl's head was throbbing a little less, his adrenaline was up some from the exchange with Carol, but his body was still telling him it wanted to sleep.
"You're bleeding again..." Beth's stern tone turned to one of concern. "Let me look..."
She gently pulled back the gauzy bandage, looking with her fingers.
"Oww..."
"Yeah 'oww'. You didn't bust any, you just pulled them. The swelling hasn't had time to go down; that's why the stitches are so tight." She replaced the bandage, pulling the covers back up and tucking them around him all snug.
That's when Daryl realized what Beth said. The swelling hasn't had time to go down.
"How long was I sleeping?" He was kinda afraid of the answer.
"The sun's getting low now, so I don't know...maybe seven hours."
"Same day?"
Beth nodded.
Fuck me... That's why he felt like shit. The wound combined with the pain killers and sleeping meds plus his state of exhaustion should've kept him out a lot longer to start healing.
Dammit Carol.
That meant he was still facing at least two more days in bed if Bob counted today as a day, which he probably didn't. Daryl hadn't planned on listening to Bob...but if he still felt this shitty, he might have to.
"Phhh..." his deep sigh did nothing to help the sting. Whoever said deep breathing took focus from the pain was a fucking idiot. Focus on Beth though, that was a different story. "Where'd you go, Beth?'
"I just went downstairs for a minute with Maggie to make sure everything down there was okay. I was tired...just laid down for a second because I didn't want to bother you, and I feel asleep."
She was tired...needed sleep just as much as he did, but he'd left her alone to deal with their entire group in their new house. They hadn't even had time to fully adjust yet.
"I want you to sleep up here from now on, okay? With me or without me, if you're sleeping, I want it to be in our bed where I know I can find you." He didn't wanna make her think he was possessive. The new situation just made him feel as protective as he was of her when they were out in the open. "Beth, you hear me?"
She finally nodded. "I probably need to be here to watch out for you. You said for me to watch out for Carol, but I think she has her eyes set on you."
Beth...he couldn't really read her now. She said it like she was teasing him, but there were implied questions there...why he'd told her to watch out for Carol, what Carol wanted to talk to him about...questions that he wasn't ready to answer, but she needed to take seriously...Karen and David...At least she remembered what he said to her before all the shit went down this morning.
"Stop," he teased back.
Beth smiled before she leaned down to kiss him. Daryl caught her, hand behind the back of her neck, trying to pull her down closer.
"No." She pulled away.
Daryl wasn't hurt by it...it wasn't something they should be doin' anyway if Bob and Rick had a say.
"Some honeymoon this is," Daryl complained, nine parts teasing, one part bitter.
"You need to get well, Daryl Dixon. I wanna be with you..." Beth's words were almost a whisper, but he heard every single one of them.
And that innocence, the way she looked away shyly when he wouldn't take his eyes off her...it killed him. He reached out for her again, but Beth pulled away, just out of his reach, slowly shaking her head no. Her smile was sweet, but to him it was pure seduction...her teeth raking over her bottom lip, something Daryl wondered if she even noticed that she did when she was around him. Beth was teasing him...challenging him...challenging him to heal.
Beth was all the incentive he needed.
