Chapter 55

It wasn't until Jason left the safe house that he grew extremely angry. Sure Manny had plucked his nerves and taunted him but Jason had managed to stay pretty cool. In the end Manny did not give him any information he didn't already know even though he was sure there was more Manny could have told him.

There was a time that Jason would have tortured Manny to within an inch of death and then let his body painfully drain the last bit of life. Maybe it was what Elizabeth said before he left the house or maybe it was the thought of becoming a father but something was different. In the end Jason actually found himself pitying Manny. It was obvious that Manny was troubled and never gotten the help he needed. He had no understanding of the value of happiness, life, family or love and for that Jason pitied him.

It was after dinner and Jason knew Elizabeth would be at home worrying about him but he needed to calm down before returning to her house. He stopped at the Penthouse and picked up his motorcycle to take a ride. He rode fast as he often did after an intense day. There were so many things happening so fast, some good and some bad.

There was a good chance that Manny could have gotten to Elizabeth. She had so much faith in his ability to keep her safe but he did not feel as confident about his ability. Sure the house was a fortress and could protect against any intruder but protecting her outside of the property posed a major problem. Working in a hospital was difficult because there would always be situations where guards could not accompany her to se patients or into surgery due to confidentiality or sanitary reasons. Asking her to quit her job was most likely not an option.

The elevator incident was Big Sal's responsibility, he was supposed to be guarding her and that was certainly a situation that could have been avoided. Sal had been one of the first employees he had hired after purchasing the island and he trusted him and respected him. Jason also knew that Sal was probably already beating himself up over the incident, more so then anything Jason could say to him.

Shifting gears, Jason took the curves in the road faster, the speed soothing his nerves. Sonny posed a major problem. He was most likely still trying to locate the island with the help of the lunatic Anthony Zacharra. He knew that they were not close to finding it thanks to Manny, but Jason wondered the true reason why Sonny had not involved him. Was it because he knew Jason would not approve or… no, there was no way that Sonny could possibly know Jason owned the island. They had been very thorough making sure that all island business was kept secure.

Now that their business affiliation was being abolished, where did it leave them – friends or enemies. Would Sonny see Jason as a threat as Jason was finding himself seeing Sonny?

Jason's method of thinking and reasoning seemed to be changing. He finally realized it as he took mercy on Manny. Was it because of what Elizabeth said before he left? Perhaps it was because for the first time he needed to think about his child. He had a family to come home to every day and the idea of sitting in a ten by ten cell for fifty years while his family lives life without him made his stomach feel queasy. All it took was one little slip up and the PCPD would arrest him. Jason had a lot of faith in Diane as a lawyer but Ric would stop at nothing to get Jason convicted and sent away to prison, including fabricating evidence.

Exiting his partnership with Sonny was a start at stepping away from the business. It was not something he planned on doing for a long time but between Sonny's shadiness and the changes in his personal life, it made sense. Leaving the business altogether was impossible, unless he secluded himself on the island, and so was the possibility of living a life with Elizabeth and the kids without constant guards. Elizabeth repeatedly told him that she accepted his life and what he did but he had to wonder if she really thought about what was involved. Guards… bullet proof windows… constantly looking over your shoulder at who was behind you.

Without even deciding on the destination, Jason found himself heading back in the direction of Elizabeth's house. They had discussed a lot over the past many days but he still felt the need to thoroughly explain the implications of a life with him. Maybe he'd spend the next thirty years asking her if it was what she wanted, each time worried she would say no. The only time in his life that he felt insecure was when it came to Elizabeth. She was better then him and deserved better. She deserved a perfect life with a picket fence, a dog in the yard and a swing set in the backyard – not a 8 foot privacy wall, guarded gate and bullet proof glass.

Jason killed the motor on his bike and nodded to Nathan as the young guard swept the front of the property. His ride had been longer then planned and it was well after midnight. The house was dark except for a light in the main foyer that Elizabeth had undoubtedly left on for him. After gently climbing the stairs, Jason checked in on Cameron who was soundly sleeping in his bed. He slowly walked down the hall to Elizabeth's room. It, like the rest of the house, was dark. Elizabeth was sleeping on her side facing the middle of the bed. The moonlight coming through the window illuminated the room slightly, allowing him to see that she was wearing one of his t-shirts. He managed a smile and sat in the small armchair just inside the door.

For a long while he sat watching her sleep. She slept restlessly, turning multiple times in a matter of minutes, ending up on her back. He wondered if he'd ever be able to let her go. If the day ever came where she decided his life was too much, could he do it?

He felt it then and knew that losing her would be like losing the air he breaths, he would not be able to live without her and that scared him more then anything he could ever remember.

Standing from the chair, Jason crossed the room to the bathroom. Closing the door behind him, careful not to wake Elizabeth, he climbed into the shower to wash the night from his body. Jason's palms rested against the wall as the water fell over his body. He lifted his head toward the showerhead and squeezed his eyes closed while the water showered over his face. A cool draft caused his eyes to open and his head to drop.

Her soft hands smoothed across his back and he sighed at how good it felt when she touched him. Every single nerve came to life under her hands creating a delicious ache. He felt her lips press a kiss to his shoulder blade, "Are you ok?" she asked, her voice so low that he barely heard her over the sound of the running water.

Jason turned around, revealing her naked body to his eyes. She was perfect before she was pregnant and there was something about the pregnancy that made her look even more beautiful, which Jason did not think was possible. He took a step back so Elizabeth could step under the shower head. His eyes landed on hers and he realized she was waiting for an answer to her question. He managed a nod.

Her eyes searched his, read them. "What's wrong?" she asked, raising her hands to cup his face.

Jason shook his head and sighed, "You deserve better." He whispered and closed his eyes, not wanting her to see his insecurity.

Elizabeth felt her stomach knot at his words. Her eyes narrowed and she waited a long moment until his eyes opened again, "Jason, what are you saying?" After the words left her mouth she was not sure if she was prepared for his answer.

Jason shrugged and wrapped his hands around her wrists but did not remove her hands from his face. "You deserve a better life then what I have to offer you." He mumbled.

"No Jason. I deserve to have the life I want and you are what I want… unless this is not what you want anymore."

"You are all I want. You and Cam and our baby."

Relief washed through Elizabeth's body. "Good because I don't know what I would do if you ever walked away from us."

Jason shook his head, "Me either." One of his hands slid down her arm and his hand turned and brushed across the top of her chest causing her to shiver. "Are you cold?"

She shook her head and he stepped closer to her, the heat from his body sending another warm shiver through her body. She needed to say more though but struggled to find the words with his wet, hard, naked body standing in front of her. "I love you. I know I messed up in the past. I was too scared, but I'm not scared anymore Jason and I can't turn back. I don't want to live without you, I can't."

Her hair was wet and sticking to her face. Jason took his hands and pushed it from her face while her own hands made their way down his body to explore his chest. His palms cupped her wet cheeks. "I love you."

His eyes fell to her lips and her hands slid up his chest, around his neck and hooked around the back of his head. She gently nudged the back of his head, unable to wait another second to feel his lips against hers. The kiss was gentle but passionate, causing Elizabeth's knees to shake. Pulling back for air, Elizabeth reached around Jason and turned off the shower water, knowing that if they were going to continue her condition would make things difficult in the shower.

They each stepped out of the shower and grabbed towels to dry off but neither made an attempt to dress, instead Elizabeth took his hand and led him back into the bedroom. Stopping beside the bed, she waited for him to sit but she pushed him so he was laying on the bed then straddled is hips.

Jason's eyes took in the sight of her, his hands exploring under his gaze. He studied her thighs and the curve of her stomach that protected their child. Her skin was smooth as silk. Her hair drew his eyes to her breasts, the way drops of water fell from the ends of her long locks, falling over her full breasts, teasing him before landing on her belly. He brought his hands to them, brushing his thumbs over the firm peak. Her eyes closed and her head tilted back as she moaned his name.

The way his name sounded as it melodiously passed her lips was sinful and all he wanted was to hear it again and again… and he did. She moaned his name repeatedly throughout the night until they fell together on their sides spent and both fully loved.