Hi everyone, I hope you all had a fantastic Easter. I'm sorry if this chapter is crap, I am uploading it before sending it to snowgoose. But I promise Snowgoose, I'll send you the next chapter tonight :) I just really wanted to get this chapter up to make way for the next one! Enjoy everyone and don't forget to review!
For those who reviewed the last chapter, thank you so much - you are all amazing :)
Chapter 53
RPOV
When I woke up in the morning, it was on my own. I looked over and saw that Dimitri had already gotten up and feeling the mattress next to me, he'd been up for a while because the mattress was cold. Sighing, I got out of bed and put on a dressing gown before walking downstairs. I peeked in Lily's room on my way past and found that she too had already woken up.
I found them both in the kitchen, Lily sitting on the bench with a wooden spoon in her hand and a mixing bowl in her lap. Dimitri was at the oven turning it on. I really wished I had a camera at this moment because it was something I think Dimitri would cherish forever. Then I remembered the Camera Lissa had got for me. I quietly turned and went back to the room to find it. I had packed it in my suitcase for moments exactly like this.
When I got back to the kitchen, camera in hand, Dimitri was standing at the bench with Lily, a wooden spoon in his hand as well. Just as I went to click the camera, Lily dipped her finger in the bowl and wiped it on Dimitri's nose. The camera captured it perfectly. The flash had alerted them to my presence.
"Morning babe, did you have a good sleep?"
"Morning Mama"
"Good morning my angel. And yes thank you, I had a fantastic sleep, although I don't like waking up to a cold bed" I grumbled but kissed him anyway. Dimitri just chuckled. I walked over and gave Lily one of our signature kisses and giggled when I felt her finger wipe mixture on the side of my cheek.
"You cheeky little princess" I said as I dipped my finger in the bowl and ran it across her forehead. And that was how the food war started. Before we knew it, we all had mixture on our faces and were laughing hysterically. I still didn't even know what the mixture was for. When the war finally stopped, I decided I better find out.
"What were you meant to be making anyway Comrade" I asked licking a bit off the side of my mouth.
"Pancakes my love. Everyone is coming over for breakfast remember" and as soon as he said it, I did remember. We had organised for everyone to come here for Breakfast because we had the bigger apartment because there were three of us instead of just two.
"And let me guess, they'll be here any moment won't they?" just as I finished my sentence, there was a knock at the door. Through the bond, I could tell it was Lissa. I went over and answered the door.
We were greeted with laughter as Lissa, Christian, Eddie and Adrian walked in. Then I remembered all the batter we had on our faces.
"Sorry, breakfast is going to be a bit longer. We kind of ummm…"
"I don't want to know what you and Dimitri were doing with that batter Rosie" laughed Christian. Before I could attack him for calling me Rosie, Lily ran through the door.
"Uncle Chrissie" she called before jumping into his arms.
"Hey bug how are you today? Wow, have you been helping mummy and daddy to cook have you?"
"Uh huh. Papa let me" she said sounding very proud of herself.
"Let me guess, Mama started a food fight too didn't she" replied Christian.
"No way, that was me" Lily giggled, causing all of us to laugh with her.
"So much like her mother" said Lissa through laughter.
"That she is Liss, that she is" and I proceeded to tell them how the food fight started as we walked back to the kitchen. I laughed even more when I saw that Dimitri still hadn't washed any of the mixture off his face. He had gone straight into mixing more batter together for the pancakes.
"Oh my god, look at the three of you. Dimitri, how did you end up with the most on you?" laughed Lissa.
"Come on, it's two against one" he chuckled back. Then I saw Lissa pick up the camera that I left on the bench.
"This is the perfect photo to go in an album. Stand together for me" she said pushing me and Lily over to Dimitri. We stood and posed for the photo, all of us caked in pancake mixture. "Thank you. Now, I think you all better go and get washed up and changed before everyone else gets here. Christian and I can keep going with this" she said pointing around the kitchen. I don't know if she was talking about the mess or the cooking.
We went upstairs and quickly showered. Lily came in the shower with me as it was easier to just wash her hair instead of trying to get the batter out. Once she was clean, Dimitri came and got her out to dry and dress while I cleaned myself up. Once I got out and dried, I noticed Dimitri still wasn't back in our room so I headed to Lily's. I found them arguing over what Lily was going to wear. I stifled a laugh and continued watching them, knowing that Lily would end up winning and wearing what she wanted. Sure enough, within a minute, Dimitri was giving in and letting her pick her clothes. I laughed outright at the proud look on Lily's face when she realised she had won the argument! Dimitri's head spun around in my direction.
"A little help would have been nice" he grumbled, but he had a bright smile on his face so I knew he wasn't really angry.
"You should know when it comes to clothes Lily always wins" I chuckled.
"I think Lissa has had too much influence on her already" he said. I laughed. It wasn't that Lissa had influenced her; it was just that she was a typical female.
"Come on, your turn to have a shower before it is caked on that much you can't get it off" I said as I pulled a big chunk of batter out of his hair.
"OK. I won't be long" he said leaning down to give me a quick kiss before walking back towards the bathroom.
"We'll meet you back in the lounge room" I called after him.
Once Lily was finished dressing, I picked her up and walked back towards the lounge room, making a detour in the kitchen first. Lissa was walking around the kitchen with a spray in one hand and a cloth in the other, while Christian was finishing the cooking.
"Here Liss, let me take that" I said trying to take the spray off her.
"It's ok Rose, it's all done. I must admit, you look a lot more refreshed now" she chuckled. I felt the blush creep up to my cheeks.
"It was quite hilarious walking in and seeing all three of you looking like that. I can't believe how much of a mess you guys made" laughed Christian.
"What can I say, we don't do anything half assed in this house" I laughed. "Thanks for cleaning Liss, and thanks for finishing the food Christian. At least now no one will starve once they get here"
"No problems Rosie" Christian said. I glared at him, but he cut me off before I could say anything about the Rosie reference. "You owe me for this, so no killing me ok, it slipped out"
I laughed again. "You're safe just this once. I hear it again, and I'm gonna kick your ass"
"You're on. Now, go and say hello to your guests. Everyone is already here. Adrian and Eddie are with them in the lounge room"
I walked into the room and saw Dimitri's family, Adrian, Eddie, Cal, Mia and my parents all spread out in various places on the floor. I walked in and started to say hello to everyone. As I got to Dimitri's family, I suddenly felt his presence by my side. I smiled internally, relaxing visibly. I still felt strange around his family. Sorry, strange isn't the right word. It's more self conscious, which is definitely not something I am used to. I wanted his family to accept me for me, not pity me for what I had been through. I didn't feel this way because of anything they had said or done though. They were fantastic. It was just my inner demons coming out in me.
"Grub's ready" called Christian from the kitchen. Thank god for that. I was starving, and it gave me the out I needed to try and cover my lack of confidence around them.
We all filed into the kitchen area and sat around the huge table. We didn't all fit though, so a few people sat at the bench, me included. I sat and watched as everyone ate their dinner. The chatter around the table was constant, no awkward silences at all. Dimitri's family fit in with mine so well, you would have thought they had always been around. I watched Lily talk excitedly to her grandmother's, Janine on one side and Olena on the other.
"Hey, are you ok?" a voice asked from beside me. I turned to see Adrian taking a seat next to me.
"Yeah, fine" I replied.
"Why are you sitting up here and not down there with Dimitri and Lily?"
"Just giving him time to sit with his family. He hasn't seen them for such a long time" I partly lied. It was half the truth. He was sitting in between his mother and Viktoria.
"You know you were never a good liar" he chuckled.
"Only because you can see my damn Aura" I groaned. He chuckled again.
"You know you can talk to me if you need to" he said becoming serious again.
"Thanks Adrian, for everything" I said turning to look at him again. I suddenly realised that I had never properly thanked him for his part in confronting the Queen. "You know I couldn't have done any of this without you"
"No need to thank me Lil Dhampir" he said diverting his eyes. I knew he was hurting. Tatiana was his favourite Aunt at one stage. "I still can't believe some of the things she did. I know it's not me you need to hear it from, but I really am sorry for everything she did to you"
"Don't be Adrian. No one knows why she did the things she did. Please stop feeling like you could have somehow stopped it. You couldn't have. The only one who could was Voda, and she was just as delusional"
"I was her closest relative Rose. I should have been able to see it"
"No, you couldn't have. She had everyone believing she was a saint. No one, including yourself, and until recently, myself, could have thought she was capable of that. It must have been so hard for you to do what you have to help me. For that, I will be forever grateful Adrian. Thank you for everything you have done. I'm sorry it cost you so much"
"You are family to me Lil Dhampir. I would do anything for you"
"You are going to make someone a very lucky lady one day" I said with a smile.
"If I can meet someone and have half the relationship you and Dimitri have, I will be the lucky one" he smiled back.
"You will Adrian, one day you will meet her" it was then that I realised his eyes were resting on Viktoria. It was the kind of look that I gave Dimitri when I first met him. "Or have you already" I chuckled.
"Huh…What are you talking about" he asked blushing furiously.
"Oh don't play dumb with me. I see the way you look at her. You like Viktoria" I whispered so no one could hear us.
"I don't know what you're talking about Lil Dhampir" he grinned. I glared at him. "Ok ok, I think she is very attractive, and from what I have seen so far, she is a nice girl. I wouldn't mind getting to know her a little"
"Yeah, she does seem nice so far" I said. "Well, tonight is your chance to show her some of your natural charm…At the concert. You are coming aren't you?"
"You bet your ass I'm coming. No one could stop me. You know, you don't have to be so self conscious around them Rose. I can see it in their Aura's; they really do love you already"
"How did you….Damn Aura reading Moroi" I grumbled. Adrian laughed out loud making everyone look at us. Dimitri looked concerned. I gave him a reassuring smile and looked back down at my food.
"I'm just going to head out for a walk. I'll be back soon" I said standing up and walking out of the room.
"Roza" I heard Dimitri call, but I kept walking. I heard footsteps coming up behind me, and assumed that it was Dimitri. I picked up my pace. It wasn't though. It was Viktoria.
"Hey, slow down…damn you walk too fast" she complained. I chuckled quietly and came to a stop, waiting for her. "Hey, are you ok?"
"Yeah, I'm fine. At least I will be. Sorry I left, I just need to walk and clear my head" I said.
"Bullshit Rose. You have looked uncomfortable since the moment you walked into the lounge room and set eyes on us. Do we make you uncomfortable? My family I mean?"
"No…No, not at all. It's just, oh it's so hard to explain Viktoria"
"It's Vika, or Vik, or Vikki, whatever you want. And please, try to explain"
"Ok, Vik, it's just that when I first fell in love with Dimitri, I wanted nothing more than to meet his family. The way he used to talk about you guys made me so envious. All I ever wanted was a family and until recently, I didn't have that"
"But you and your parents are so close" she stated.
"We are now. But we weren't always like that. My mother left me at the academy when I was little and I barely saw her. It wasn't until the last few months that I was at the Academy that I started building a relationship with her. And until around 3 years ago, I didn't even know who my father was"
"Oh Roza, I'm so sorry"
"It's ok. My mum didn't believe the story that I had run away. After the attack at the school, when she watched me run in and save Dimitri from that Strigoi, she thought then that our relationship was more than just student and mentor. Me refusing to leave his side at the hospital proved to her that she was right, so when she was told I had run away again, she didn't believe me. She enlisted the help of Abe and they came to find me. I found out he was my father shortly after and since then, we have all grown extremely close. If it wasn't for them and Cal, I really don't think I would be alive right now"
"I'm glad they found you when they did. But that doesn't tell me why you act so strange around us"
"Vik, I broke your brother's heart, and I know your mum said last night that you all understand, but I know if someone broke Lily's heart like that, I would never be able to trust them, or let them into my home or my heart. How can any of you just accept me like that? If I was you, I would hate me for everything I have done. Because of me, Dimitri was under compulsion for years. He almost married someone because of what I had done to him" I was crying by now, but I couldn't stop. Something about Viktoria made me want to get everything off my chest. So I kept going. "If I had of just taken the other option Kirova gave me, Dimitri would never have had his heart broken, he wouldn't have gotten into a relationship with Tasha and he would have watched his daughter grow up"
I couldn't talk anymore, the sobbing had started and I couldn't stop. Vik put her arm around my shoulder and pulled me into her.
"Roza, if you hadn't of made that decision to leave, then Dimka would be in jail, you would have been expelled and sent away and the Queen would have taken Lily to be a pin cushion. I know it doesn't seem like you made the right decision, but you did. And even though I've only just met you, I know that if you were given the options again right now, you would still take the option that was best for Dimitri and not yourself. And that is why we understand and accept what has happened. I won't lie, it killed us to hear Dimka so broken hearted on the phone the day he heard you had 'run away', but then when he came to see us for those two weeks, we knew instantly that he was under compulsion and it was you that our heart went out to"
"But why? How did you know it was me that had organised it?"
"Mama rang the headmistress and demanded to know what was going on. She filled us in on everything Roza. The bond with Lissa, you watching Dimka through her eyes, you demanding that they use compulsion so he didn't have to hurt anymore, even though that would have killed you in the process. Roza, you are such a strong hearted woman. Our family has never hated you. We have waited 3 long years to meet you. You should be proud of yourself, not this self conscious person you are this morning. As for Lily, we would never hold that against you because we know that until recently, you didn't even know she was alive. It was hard keeping it from Dimka, but we knew how important it was. Babushka made sure of that" she chuckled. "Basically Roza, our family loves you like a sister and daughter already. Nothing that has happened in the last three years has changed that, and nothing ever will"
"Thank you Vik, it means a lot. I'm sorry I've been so short with you all. God, three years ago I wouldn't have been concerned at about meeting you all. I can't believe how worried I have been about your acceptance of me"
"Roza, you have been through a lot these past few years, but never underestimate the love your family has for you. Anybody would be crazy not to love you" she said pulling me in for another hug. "Now come on, dry those tears and let's go back to your family. You need to introduce me to that hotness you were talking to earlier"
"Adrian?" I questioned.
"If he's the one with the green eyes, then hell yeah" she laughed. I laughed with her. In that moment, I saw just how much Vik was like me, well like I used to be, and I knew we would get along great.
Dimitri walked up to me as soon as I walked back in the door.
"Roza, is everything ok?" he asked. You could see the concern all over his face.
"I'm fine Comrade. I just wanted to take a little walk. Vik kept me company" I said smiling over at her. Thank you I mouthed to her. She gave me a thumbs up and walked over to her siblings. Dimitri studied me to see if I was telling the truth and could obviously see that I had been crying. His thumb wiped my cheek and just above my eye. It was his silent way of telling me that he knew I had been crying. "Vik and I just had a little talk. She made me realise some things. It helped"
"I'm glad. You know you can talk to me if you need to babe"
"I know, but you couldn't help with this one" I said standing on tip toes to kiss his lips. "So, what's everyone up to today?"
I heard collective groans from all the guys and excitement from the girls. I knew what that meant and I groaned right along with the boys. Shopping.
"We need to go and get some stuff for the concert tonight Rose. And don't even think about trying to get out of it, we are going. But don't worry, it's not an outside shopping trip. Everything we need we can get here at Court" said Lissa. See, I told you they would love you she said through the bond.
Shopping Liss? Seriously? Can't we just do nothing for a change?
Not a chance hun. You need something to wear tonight and so do Dimitri's sisters.
Argh, ok. But I'm not going all day. I want to finish up a song before tonight.
"Argh, would you two stop doing that" complained Christian.
"What?" we both asked in Unison.
"It's pretty obvious you're talking to each other again. You didn't hear a word I just said to you"
"You're just jealous" I said sticking my tongue out at him.
After breakfast was finished and the dishes were cleaned, everyone went their separate ways. Lissa, Vik, Sonya, Karolina and I went shopping while Mia had to leave and go to work. Dimitri, Christian, Adrian, Cal and Paul went to do man things they said. Olena and Yeva took Zoya and Lily with her. They were going to a play centre so that Lily could have a play for a few hours. She doesn't like shopping unless it's to buy her things. Mark and Oksana went back to their room to pack. They were leaving to go back to Russia the next day. Oksana was anxious to get back home. Nicola, Kaiden and Adam went to get the equipment set up for the concert. I don't know where my parents went. They had disappeared before I got back from my walk after Breakfast.
The rest of the afternoon was actually quite fun. There was a lot of laughter and I actually got along great with Sonya and Karolina as well. We all picked outfits for tonight which would make the guys drool. Lissa and I teased Vik about Adrian and Liss promised that she would help get them dancing together at the concert. I promised to play a nice slow song for them.
I hadn't seen Dimitri and the guys since they left earlier that morning. They came home to get ready about twenty minutes before we had to leave to go to the hall. Us girls had just finished getting ready and their eyes almost fell out of their heads when they saw us.
"Roza, you look absolutely amazing" said Dimitri coming straight over to me.
"You like?" I asked doing a little twirl.
"I love. How am I going to watch you up there without coming up and dragging you off stage somewhere?" he whispered in my ear. I chuckled.
"I promise, when we get home, I will make it up to you" I said seductively in his ear.
"I like the sound of that" he said bringing his lips to mine.
As soon as the guys were ready, we headed down to the hall. The concert wasn't meant to start for another hour, but we wanted to help finish setting it up. I couldn't believe my eyes when we got there and there were already people lined up waiting to get in.
"Wow" I whispered as we snuck past the crowd. It was a relatively young crowd, but there were also quite a few adults there as well. Guardians were keeping them from entering the building.
Before I knew it, the hour had passed and I was standing up on stage with Cal, Nicola, Kaiden and Adam. My friends and family were right down the front in the very first row of chairs. We had set it up so directly below the stage there was a dance floor, but there was also seating for those who wanted to sit. Rows and rows of chairs had been set up behind the dance floor.
I cleared my throat. "Welcome everyone. Thank you so much for coming. Before we begin, for those who don't know us, I am Rose, or some of you know me as Marie, this is Caleb, Nicola, Kaiden and Adam. Normally when I am up here on stage, I am in disguise. Not tonight. Thanks to a magazine article that went around recently, there is no need to disguise who I really am. Not anymore. Tonight will be the last time we play together as a band. Nicola, Kaiden and Adam will be continuing with the band, but Cal and I will no longer be with them. I hope you enjoy the show. First up is a song we like to call Plans.
We made plans to kiss the sun at night
Hopeless dreamers, hopeless types
Shedding skin you show your beauty scars
Don't forget me or who you are
You know this don't feel right
Who knows what we feel?
I just met you I can read your thoughts
What they tell me is what I want
I'll keep you guessing keep you wanting more
'Cos where we're going no one knows
You know this don't feel right
Who knows this could feel right
I just met you, I swear I read your thoughts
So don't forget me or what you want
Light up the stage, make your move, give me something
So I can dance in your light and to your rhythm
Soon it unfolds who we are in this masquerade of stars
Tear off the mask, the face you hide is what I'm missing
We made plans to kiss the sun at night
Hopeless dreamers, hopeless types
One was turning, one was standing still
I won't forget what was promised here
You know this don't feel right
Who knows what we feel?
The night continued and the crowd went wild. We decide that we would do five songs that were requested from the crowd. Hands shot up everywhere. We made it through 3 songs before someone called out a song I definitely did not want to sing here. I couldn't sing it without crying. As soon as the song was mentioned though, the crowd went wild. I always knew it was a favourite, we sold the most singles for this song, so I knew there was no getting out of it.
"Ok ok, I will play it, but this is the first time it has ever played at a concert, so feel privileged ok. I get a little emotional playing this song, so I apologise in advance. This song is for anyone who has ever lost anyone close to them" I said out loud to the crowd. Then quietly, I whispered, this one's for you Mase.
Lonely, broken, hopeless
I'm supposed to be strong
I'm supposed to find a way to carry on
But I don't want to feel better
I don't wanna not remember
Won't you please
I will laugh
I will cry
Shake my fist at the sky
But I will not say goodbye
[ Lyrics from: .com/lyrics/d/danny_gokey/i_will_not_say_ ]
They keep saying time will heal
But the pain just gets more real
The sun comes up each day
Might be waiting, hating, praying, waiting
If I can keep on holding on
Maybe I can keep my heart from knowing that you're gone
Cause I don't wanna feel better
I don't wanna not remember
I will always see your face
In the shadows of this haunted place
I will laugh
I will cry
Shake my fist at the sky
But I will not say goodbye
I will curse
I will pray
I'll relive every day
I will show through the pain
I'll shout out your name
I will laugh
I will cry
Shake my fist at the sky
But I will not say
Will not say goodbye
I will not say goodbye
Will not say ooooohhhhh
The crowd went wild when I finished. I had a few tears in my eyes, but nothing like I normally do. I was quite proud of myself. I quickly wiped my eyes and looked out into the crowd. My eyes found Lissa's first and she was desperately trying to wipe the tears off her eyes as well. She gave me a big smile
That was absolutely beautiful Rose
Thanks Liss.
"Ok guys, this is the last song of the night. I really hope you have enjoyed yourselves. This song pretty much sums things up for me. I originally wrote it for different circumstances, but the lyrics can be quite fitting for different things. I really have had the time of my life playing and singing in this band. I know you all know this song, so sing along with me ok"
Another turning point;
A fork stuck in the road.
Time grabs you by the wrist;
Directs you where to go.
So make the best of this task and don't ask why.
It's not a question but a lesson learned in time.
It's something unpredictable
But in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life.
So take the photographs
And still frames in your mind.
: .com/lyrics/g/green_day/time_of_your_ ]
Hang it on a shelf
In good health and good time.
Tattoos of memories
And dead skin on trial.
For what it's worth,
It was worth all the while.
It's something unpredictable
But in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life.
So make the best of this task and don't ask why.
It's not a question but a lesson learned in time.
It's something unpredictable
But in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life.
"Ok that's us out. For the next hour we will be signing autographs and taking photos, then the hall will be closed for a private function. We hope you enjoyed our show" said Cal as we all walked off stage. We didn't bother putting our gear away because I had no doubt that we would play a song or two later tonight for the family.
Outside, we signed autographs and had pictures taken while chatting with the fans. They were all sad to see us splitting up, but being Dhampirs and Moroi themselves, they understood. They also understood why I had sung in disguise as well. It turns out most of them had been told all about the trial from their parents.
The signing and photographs took a little longer than the hour, but my family seemed to be patient. In fact, I hadn't even seen them since the show finished. I assumed they had taken the kids to the park for a while. Boy was I wrong. Walking back in the hall about an hour and half later, I couldn't believe the transformation. Gone were all the chairs and in place were some tables along the back wall which were filled with food and a table next to it that had drinks and cups lined up. There were also a few tables spread around throughout the room with a 3-4 chairs at each one. It had gone from a concert hall to a party room within the hour.
"Lissa" I breathed and Cal laughed.
"She definitely knows how to get things done doesn't she" he laughed.
"Especially when it comes to any kind of party" I replied.
We closed the door behind us and went to mix in with my family and friends that were already here. Suddenly, a pair of hands grabbed me from behind, which sent my heart racing, until I smelt the aftershave. I spun around in his arms.
"You….were….amazing" he said between kisses. "You come alive on stage Roza, you belong on stage. Are you sure you want to leave all that?"
"I belong wherever you, Lily and Liss are Comrade. And that place will be the Academy. It's the safest place for all of us to be"
