Hi everyone! Time for the next chapter and I have to thank you all again for your patience and kind words about the story and last chapter! I am loving writing this and even though the last few chapters have been a coming a little more slowly than I would like, I am glad you are all sticking with this story and me! I am very excited about this chapter and hope you will love it just as much as I do!
Thank you again for my wonderful betas LadyWinterlight and AerisAimaraCiren who have edited, criticized and supporting the story (and supporting me when things in my personal life have been nuts!)
It was my birthday this past Friday and my husband surprised me with flying my husband in as a total shock to me and it lead to me being offline pretty much all weekend! As soon as I could finish looking over and making changes that were suggested today I am posting! Please enjoy and keep the comments and kudos coming! They absolutely inspire me and help encourage me when things get nuts! Enjoy and I can't wait to hear what everyone thinks!
Chapter 54
Hermione was still giggling when she landed firmly behind Severus as he was clearly giving himself a final once over before leaving for what must have been the muggle world. Spiffy was silent as she had popped them into the room and the witch had to say remember to thank the small elf for staying silent as she had quickly left. It gave her a chance to admire Severus' lean form from behind. She had always found him attractive in an elegant, noble sort of way but now seeing his lean and powerful form wrapped in a beautiful muggle sweater and jeans. Hermione could safely say she had a whole new appreciation for Severus.
She knew that Severus had known the moment she had entered the room. The man did not simply drop all of the traits and habits of two decades of successful spying. Hermione felt his gaze through his mirror while she appraised his backside. She was absolutely not blushing as she enjoyed a lovely view of his very attractive bum in some very well fitting jeans. She finally raised her eyes from the delectable view that was his backside to meet his eyes in the mirror.
She gasped as she saw the open fire burning in Sev's onyx eyes. Hermione also didn't miss the sinful smirk that the wizard was sporting. He had heard her giggling and left her to ogle his bum. She couldn't blame him for being cocky and smirking at her given how long she had been perusing. The fire in his eyes showed her that Sev clearly was enjoy what he could see of her in the mirror. She quickly gathered her wits and decided to meet his smirk with one of her own.
Hermione decided to move first and stepped forward and wrapped her arms around him from behind. She could feel how thin he was from the war. She recognized that he, like her, could probably stand to learn to eat a bit more now that there wasn't the threat of hunger, torture or death hanging over their heads. She nuzzled her head against the back of his shoulder and took in the smell that was Severus. She heard him breathe deeply and her smirk turned into a broad smile.
She released her arms and stepped around in front of him, kissing his cheek as she passed. She watched as his face almost melted from the smirk she loved and had seen many times before to an absolutely heart melting smile; it was clearly something he saved for only those close to him and she felt honored that it was directed at her, caused by her. Hermione couldn't help it, she threw her arms around his neck and kissed him with passion. He paused a beat before responding with fervor. She nearly got lost in Severus once again. His passion was near soul consuming and she loved the fire and the burn of it.
Before she could get completely lost in his kisses, his strong arms now wrapped around her and his beautiful hands quickly making their way under the thin vest she was wearing, Hermione pulled back with a groan. She knew as soon as he felt her try to break away he would stop immediately and she was right. Severus didn't drop all contact but his hands quickly made their way above fabric and his lips stopped devouring hers. She groaned at the loss of his talented fingers caressing her and his surprisingly strong lips. Still she knew she had to talk to him about how she was upset and she couldn't allow herself to get distracted by any of the more sinful pursuits she wanted to explore with Sev.
Hermione knew she didn't need to approach this conversation the same way she had approached her chat with Lu. Severus may have been biased against Gryffindors (and, if she had to be honest, with good reason) but he still understood them. He also understood how lonely being the intelligent one could be. He understood how terrible it could be to be the awkward one. He also knew the hurt of being abandoned in your time of need by someone who was supposed to be your best friend. He understood her past and he had shown that he could and would listen to her without her having to manipulate or choose her words just as carefully as she had with Lu. She already knew at least that much was true.
It caused her to feel a bit more comfortable when, with their arms still wrapped around each other, she let her smile drop just a bit and look at him with a serious and determined intent in her eyes. Severus began to frown and then when he noticed that she was still smiling a warm and welcoming smile he rewarded her with a warm chuckle. Before Hermione could scold him in the slightest for laughing at her attempt at giving him a slight serious look in his wonderfully silky voice that sent chills down her spine he leaned in and whispered in her ear. "Oh Hermione, how I wish that determined look in your eye was for your determination to get into my jeans to get a better look at my bum. I won't even pretend that I didn't see you ogling me. You are lucky witch that I am not as vain as Lucius… although if you keep looking at me like that, Hermione, I may have reason to feel as cocky as he does most days."
Hermione could feel his grin against her cheek and ear and it made her giggle. She felt Severus kiss her cheek and then pull back but kept her in his arms and close. He met her gaze seriously but his face held none of the malice she had known while he was her professor. Instead it was neutral and almost serene. His eyes were so open and expressive and he looked ten or fifteen years younger than when she had saved him, just days ago. The stress of being a slave to both sides was gone from his over wrought shoulders and lines on his face seemed to disappear. She was almost overjoyed that also could see that the near constant scowl she had always associated with Sev was also gone. The fact that she could now associate love, trust, warmth and protection with the dark wizard made Hermione happier than she could have ever imagined.
She didn't frown but she forced herself to not get lost in his onyx eyes and tried to keep her face somewhat neutral.
She took a deep breath before she began, trying to keep her voice at least slightly warm, "Well Sev, I just finished chatting with our dear Lu. He was wondering why I wasn't languishing in the bath when I popped in on him. I am sure because you sent your very lovely little note, you are wondering why I am not with whatever spa treatments you had set up. I do have to add, Sev, that I will be the first to admit that was quite a nice bit of magic especially given the locking wards that I had put up."
Severus merely lifted an eyebrow as if he was slightly annoyed with her stating the obvious. Hermione simply matched his arched eyebrow with one of her own. This made Severus chuckle a bit and quietly rumble, "Very nice, my witch. Very nice indeed."
She knew he felt her shiver as he drew out the final word. She needed to keep her head about her. She wasn't totally upset with him, per se, but she did need to speak her peace and make sure that Severus especially understood that her problem wasn't because of who he and Lucius were. She needed to make sure that he understood that this was to make sure that the three of them didn't accidental hex someone on reflex because they were in an alleyway or brushed against them. Hermione needed Severus to understand that she wasn't rejecting the date just the timing. He may have tried to hide it but she knew he was especially sensitive to the idea of rejection and personally Hermione couldn't blame him given what little information she knew about his was not going to let his powers of seduction or his fairly obvious hesitancy to talk about anything having to deal with emotions or the past distract her from what she had come here to do.
She was trying and failing at not letting thoughts like that flit across her mind. Hermione didn't want to still see Severus like the Professor who had gleefully torn her apart no matter how hard she tried to earn his approval. She pushed that image of him to the back of her mind but it was sometimes hard to forget how cruelly he would cut her down He always seemed especially brutal when it came to her academic attempts.
Even though she now knew that it was a role he was forced to play, it didn't made the pain she had suffered any less. However, the pain and pressure he must have endured also didn't escape her. Knowing she was his destined third and he was her professor, and not only that but a double agent who had to hear threats against her person probably daily. Hermione wanted to shudder again when it flashed across her mind that Lucius had been in Azkaban when she had come of age. Sev had suffered alone and her heart broke for him on that front. It still didn't make it any easier to separate the wizard that was now rapidly becoming her beloved Sev from the man who she had always strived to impress but never seemed to, who had been markedly cruel to her about her appearance as she had grown up.
Still looking into his guarded but trusting eyes now Hermione was sure that this was her Sev. Now that she was able to really focus on his dark but expressive eyes she was able to see how much he was trying, as well as how he was doing his absolutely best to put away the mask he had worn for so many years. She could see the pain that appeared to be a constant undercurrent for Sev in those same eyes and Hermione made a silent vow to do her best everyday to try and ease a small amount of that pain.
Still, in her mind, Hermione was positive that Severus was going to be much easier to convince of her viewpoint compared to Lucius. This wizard of hers was used to living life in the shadows and not a life of first class dinners and stepping out as Lu had been. She was sure he would be more than happy to not spend the night parading in front of the wizarding public, because no matter how private they tried to make an outing she was sure people would find them.
She wanted to giggle at that thought but knew that Sev would most likely take that the wrong way. Hermione knew how expressive her face could be and knew that while Severus wasn't using legilimency on her, he could read her emotions through her eyes. She didn't try too hard to hide the grin at the corners of her mouth at his very obvious use of his particular vocal talents or their matching facial expressions. She was allowed to find that at least a slight bit funny.
"I have to say Sev that I have had years of watching the master of that very expression most intently, so if I hadn't mastered it, I would be most disappointed in myself."
He let out a deep and soul warming chuckle. Hermione couldn't help the smile that broke across her face at that sound. Still she couldn't get distracted by the wonderful sound that she hoped to hear every day for the rest of her life. Severus could distract her with much more ease than Lucius because of how well he knew her tics and personality from years of watching her. Hermione had to remain focused and at least somewhat clear headed.
"But to the point at hand, Sev. You are right, I did not come here simply to ogle you in Muggle clothing nor to practice my best Professor Snape look for you. I came to chat about what I heard while I was in my bath, possibly not quite minding my own business."
Hermione heard Severus mutter something that sounded like "insufferable know-it-all" but hardly saw his lips move except to move into a bit of a smirk that honestly made him look years younger.
As he was clearly saying that in jest, Hermione didn't scold him too much. "I heard that Sev! I wasn't the one decided to enjoy the many pleasures of Lu's mouth while my other lover was just beyond the door. I also was not the one who didn't put up any silencing charms when I was shouting my pleasure from the top of my lungs. In fact I doubt you even heard when I was able to bring myself to orgasm, you two were so loud!"
Severus had a tint of pink to his cheeks and Hermione had to admit it was rather charming and she decided to save him further embarrassment and decided to not mention the blush she found so endearing.
"But I assure you Sev, that wasn't what bothered me in the slightest. In fact I just left Lu promising a repeat performance of exactly how and where I touched myself in the tub later this evening. He seemed most enthusiastic at seeing for himself just how I was able to cum all over my hand while listening to him give you what sounded like as close to an outstanding blow job as one can."
Hermione almost had to laugh at Sev now nodding along like a bobble head at the idea of her repeat performance. She doubted that the formerly dour man got this excited over almost anything. It was an absolute boost to her admittedly slightly fragile ego to see someone as worldly as Sev react like that to watching her. It helped her strengthen her resolve just enough to let him know just what had pulled her away from what admittedly was most likely much needed pampering.
"No Sev hearing you two in the throes of pleasure only made me smile. Hearing you take into hand to plan an entire evening without consulting me, especially one as important as my first date with you two, let alone my first date ever. That is what upset me and pulled me out of the bath with those lovely oils you made me. That is what drew me away for whatever and whoever is probably waiting for me in my room for whatever spa treatments you two have cooked up."
It was clear that Severus couldn't hide the slightly hurt and confused look on his face or in his eyes. It flashed there for a moment and had Hermione not been watching him for the slightest hint of upset she would have missed it. If it hadn't been patently obvious that Severus was sensitive underneath the mask that he had almost constantly worn.
"Sev, it isn't the fact that you two wanted to take me on a date that upset me. It isn't even that you went about planning it without me. In fact, I want to be surprised on our first date as a triad. I want to be swept off my feet by my two wizards, but I also want to be able to prepare. Not just physically prepare like with the spa Sev. I want to be mentally prepared. I want to be able to be a flutter over being asked on my date, I want a chance to shop for my own outfit to prepare. I want to feel the butterflies that I know you saw on so many of your female snakes experience before the Yule Ball or their first Hogsmeade visit with a boy. There is so much I missed of being a 'girl' and being wooed and I would like to not miss this." Hermione was walking the tedious line of having passion in her voice and tone while also making sure to remain calm and collected to show Sev that this wasn't some dire mistake that there was no going back on.
Hermione saw that Sev was still considering how to respond in his calculated way. The man had not survived as a spy for so long without learning how to think before he spoke and while this was the first instance that Hermione was going to use this to her advantage she was sure it was not going to be her last.
She continued on, "It is the fact Sev that you two just decided that this was how it was going to be and this was how and when the date was going to take place. I have been willing to jump feet first into a lot of situations and scenarios, including this one with you and Lu, and for the most part most of them have turned out quite well. In fact I would say jumping in with no fear worked out quite spectacularly for me in the instance of you two, but for once I want to savor something. I want to savour my first date, the excitement and the preparation for it. I want to for once be allowed to be a woman and be allowed to titter and giggle about my upcoming date."
With pleading eyes Hermione continue, "For once Sev, I know you can appreciate this on some level I am sure, I want to absorb and take in all that I saw, heard and in some cases did during that final battle. I want a chance to take in those who we lost, those who survived and everything that I have tried to ignore for the past year. I want to sit in our home surrounded by your warmth and love and know that nothing is expected of me. I want to revel in the fact that for the first time in nearly two decades my wizards are free of their 'masters' and free of being spies. For the first time since I have known I was a witch I don't have to worry about dying or being hated for my blood. Some will cling to the old ways, I am not an idiot Sev, but most people will at least not besmirch my name or blood on the street. I want to just enjoy not being at war for a few days and not have to worry about photographs, the public, the Prophet or anyone else. It may be cowardly, but can I be a coward and selfish for once and ask to stay inside? I want to enjoy this first with you and Lu fully and truthfully that will not happen tonight no matter what magic the spa technicians can work."
Severus' face remained close to blank and impassive and Hermione wondered if she had misread a sign or a look in his eye. She was so concerned with what appeared to be his lack of reaction that she missed his hand coming up and gently brushing a stray curl off of her forehead until he was doing it. Then she saw the overwhelming love and it appeared like a hint of guilt in his stunningly deep onyx eyes.
The guilt she saw in his eyes broke her heart. She opened her mouth to speak but before she could even get a syllable out edgewise, Sev shushed her with a mere flick of his eyes and began to speak in a quiet voice which initially had Hermione on edge. "I will be honest Hermione. This has disappointed me."
Hermione felt shattered in that moment. The last thing she had wanted to do was upset either of her wizards. She knew she had to stand her ground and make her feelings known. Not necessarily about everything, but she couldn't let Sev and Lu run roughshod and plan everything. She was supposedly an equal partner in this triad and so far she was being treated as a child or a tag along. Yes, both men had made her feel desirable and wanted and that was a heady experience. What had made her feel less was the fact that at the first chance they had they had excluded her from any significant planning of what she considered to be a major event. The fact that they were about to set this plan into motion without truly informing her or even thinking to talk to her about it. Simply put, it hurt. It was something that she had feared as soon as she realized she was the third in a triad. Learning that it was based off of an existing relationship had her feeling like she would be forced to be the third wheel for the rest of her life.
She had never admitted to the Harry or Ron just how many times they had made her feel like the tag along or like she was lesser. It had been enough to simply be friends and she had liked that they had talked to her like everyone at her primary school. She had been a loner and an outcast for most of her life and had gobbed onto Harry and Ron at the first sign of friendship. She had a kind heart and a warm soul and she hid inside just how much it hurt when the boys wouldn't talk anything but Quidditch and would poke fun at her studious nature. She had hated being the add on and now, just like with her friends, she felt like the third wheel.
Just like in Hogwarts when it felt like had no one had noticed her and the boys had their significant others tagging along, she was the odd man out. She was standing on the sidelines, looking in and now she had mucked up her attempts to join in on the fun. She felt like an awkward wedge that didn't quite fit at the moment and despite her best efforts Hermione was sure that was flashing across her face like a neon sign.
While she was pants at hiding how she felt on her face and in her eyes, that wasn't the only reason she knew Sev could tell that had hurt her. She watched the realization dance across his face and wanted to leave the wizards bedroom to have a good cry. She no longer felt like the confident witch that had just told Lucius her feelings. Hermione didn't even feel like the secure witch who had popped into the room and ogled Sev so blatantly. Suddenly she felt like she was simply playing acting at a real relationship and her wizards were actually in one.
Hermione looked down and away from Sev and began to gently try to extricate herself from the hold Sev was still maintaining around her waist. She wanted to be alone right now to come to terms with what and how she was feeling and she really didn't want to hear from Sev how she had disappointed him. For seven years she had tried to impress him, gain any sort of recognition or approval from him as her professor and now one of the first chances she has as a lover and she had disappointed him? It was like a hundred pound weight had settled firmly on her heart and Hermione felt sick with guilt and regret.
She noticed Sev not being very willing to let go of the grip he had around her waist and she didn't want to look up at him to show the tears that were beginning to form in her eyes. She didn't need for him to have further proof that he had hurt her. She knew how personally Sev would take the fact that he had made her cry and she couldn't have that also resting on her conscience.
She had been so sure he would be the easy one to convince to stay in and that he would be the one to understand why she would want to not head out only a few days after they had finished fighting a war. Instead she was faced with Lucius cowing to her request with nary a second thought and Sev who was disappointed. Hermione hated more than anything the feeling that she had disappointed or let someone down. Feeling that she had done so to one of her soul mates felt crushing at that moment.
Hermione pushed back with a bit more force and to try and turn to leave the room quietly muttering to Severus, "I am so sorry I disappointed you Sev. I had no idea that going on this date this particular night meant so much to you. I can certainly go start getting ready like you and Lucius had planned. It is not a problem. I don't want to hold you up either you look dressed and ready to go run your errands I heard you telling Lu about, if you would let me go, I will let you get to them. If I was hearing things correctly I am sure they are time sensitive. Please be sure to be careful while out in public, I know not all of the Riddle's followers have been apprehended just yet."
She tried to hide the waiver that was threatening to break as she spoke. She wanted desperately to head back to her rooms and hide. Hermione hated feeling this emotional but Sev had hit one of her trigger points right on the head and try as she might she couldn't fight off her feelings.
Hermione still felt Sev's arms wrapped securely around her waist and in fact felt as if his grip had for some reason grown stronger. She wasn't going to fight him but she also wasn't going to stay where she wasn't wanted. She pulled back again, trying to twist and turn in his arms and this time she was positive she felt his grip tighten. In a slightly annoyed and fractionally louder voice, Hermione as firmly as she could in that particular moment said, "Severus please let me go. I would like to return to my room please." She emphasised the please in an slightly more irritated tone.
It did not soothe her irritation when she heard Sev clucking his tongue at her like she was a misbehaving young child. She wanted to throw a damn tantrum when she heard that. Hermione was close to stomping her feet in frustration when she felt Sev's long elegant fingers under her chin lifting her face towards his. He still held one arm firmly around her waist and now wasn't firm about it but made it obvious that he had a hold of her chin. He was clearly going to force her to look him in the eyes which was quite honestly the last thing Hermione wanted to do in that moment.
She knew however that resistance was futile. Sev was the kind of enigmatic wizard who got what he wanted one way or another. He would not be actually forcing her to look at or talk to him. However her guilt and curiosity were very clearly on his side and helping him gain the upper hand and Severus had not been the head of Slytherin House for over a decade for no reason.
When their eyes final met, Hermione was shocked not to find disappointment or hurt in Sev's eyes but regret that was tinged with just the faintest bit of humor. She wanted to slap him for even thinking this was funny but over the course of the last year on the run she had learned to at least think a smidgen before she acted. She very much doubted Sev would react even close to nicely to her slapping him, even if in her opinion he very much deserved it at this moment.
She did not attempt to hide the fact that she was fuming at what she saw in Sev's eyes or on the smirk that he was clearly trying his utmost to hide. Hermione appreciated the flicker of fear that she saw in his eyes when she started to feel her magic crackle around her due to her anger and annoyance.
Hermione kept her scowl firmly in place as Severus did not release his hold on her chin making her look up and into his eyes. In a soft and as close to placating voice as Severus was ever going to have he began to speak, "Hermione, while I pride myself on choosing my words carefully and thinking before I speak, I fear that a few moments ago I did just the opposite of that and have now hurt you. Please know, my kitten, that I never want to cause you pain. It is also now painfully obvious to me that the very polite way that you brought your needs and concerns to Lu's and my attention that you never wanted to hurt ours either."
Hermione let out a very unladylike, "Hrmph!" and scoffed. Severus chose to ignore both noises and continued on trying to explain himself to her as calmly as he could. "What I meant to express, my dear one, is not that I am disappointed in you. I don't think I ever could be and I certainly am not now. You are not some weak witch that would be cowed into a corner and would never speak her mind. That is one of the literally innumerable reasons you are perfect for Lu and myself. You came to us very openly and with all the honesty in the world and I for one admire that more than you will ever know. I also reacted and answered your honesty very poorly and while I don't know all that is going through that gorgeous head of yours I am sure that the last thing you wanted or needed to hear was that I was disappointed in you."
Tears began to leak out of the corners of Hermione's eyes and, despite her best efforts of holding them back, were falling rather rapidly. She felt Sev release his hold on her chin and then used his work-callused fingers to wipe away what he could. She couldn't speak over the lump in her throat and didn't want to nod her agreement. Hermione didn't want to lay bare any more of her weaknesses, she wasn't going to deny that her fear of rejection and disappointment were looming large at this point.
"Sweet Hermione, please don't cry. I hate that I caused this. Especially because that was not what I meant at all. I could never be disappointed in you because you spoke up. I could never be upset that you stood up for yourself and your well being. I particularly could not be upset with you for those reasons, kitten, because I asked you to do just that this morning. I asked you to stop putting others first and to allow yourself to be a priority. You did just that and I am personally upset at Lu and myself for not thinking about this date the way you did. I am upset at the two of us that in our efforts to make this first date as special as possible for you ignored the fact that it is in fact about you. That you should be properly asked and courted. None of our courtship and bonding will be completely according to tradition but we can at least try to make sure that you get to experience all that you missed out on due to the war and the idiots you went to school with not recognizing the goddess walking among them." His voice was beginning to crack and she could see his eyes beginning to well up. It almost broke Hermione to see that.
This was Severus Snape. This was the feared Potions Master that made first years tremble in place and could bring NEWT level students to tears. He had been a double agent who had hid his emotions and true thoughts just like Hermione had been forced to and he hadn't had the advantage of being out of the limelight and on the run for a year. He had been bearing the brunt of the terror at Hogwarts and at every meeting he had with Riddle. Hermione didn't imagine he had been brought to tears frequently and it made her feel just a bit worse that her tears and his poorly chosen misunderstood words to her were doing this to him now.
"Please Hermione. Please. Tell me you understand. I need you to know that it isn't you who has disappointed me, it is my and Lu's thoughtlessness. While I will admit that I do not have much experience in the way of romance and, to be honest, most if not all of my experience has come from Lu, but I do know how important those moments are. I still remember the nerves I felt asking Lu to dinner not as friends but as lovers. It was one of the best and worst feelings I've had in all of my life. I am sure, dearest, if you asked Lu he would get a dreamy look on his face and remember how he felt before our first outing. I want to give you every experience in the world that you haven't yet had and I want to sweep you off your feet. I know Lu does too. We want this to be an equal partnership, our sweet one. We need this be equal. Make no mistakes about it, Lu and I have been waiting what feels like a lifetime for you and we will not let you go now. You were made for us and we do not want to exclude you in any way. In fact, if I know Lu, he is going to try to find more ways to include you if he can and I will assist him in any way I can. We want you, Hermione, in whatever way, shape and form you will have us, we will always want you, witch." Severus was quiet for a moment and Hermione leaned into his chest tears still flowing unchecked down her face.
She felt his long hand now caressing her bare neck and she shivered then in a husky voice he finally said, "Even when I put my boot in my mouth, Hermione, I will always still want you and will want you to be involved in every discussion, adventure and plan we have. I have wanted you for years, my know-it-all, and I know without a doubt that I will want you with my last breath and beyond. Please tell me you will forgive my callous comment earlier. I know emotions are running high in this house and in the outside world and I know I should have been more aware of how my words would sound but this is still a learning process for me, for all of us. I am not the romantic Lu is and I do not have his silver tongue but I should have been more cognizant, especially knowing you as I do and knowing how much you wanted my approval in class. Even if I wasn't free to give it then, Hermione, know you have never had or earned any disappointment in you from me. I have always been inwardly beaming with pride at your bravery, your brilliance and your amazing perseverance in the face of what many would see as insurmountable challenges. I have and will always be proud of you, Hermione, and I am absolutely overjoyed that you are mine. Please never forget that, witch."
Hermione was smiling through her quickly drying tears and was trying to catch her breath which, thanks to her attempts to hold back her tears, was not coming as freely as it would have normally. She pulled her head back from its resting place on Sev's chest and looked at him, knowing her face was tear streaked and blotchy and finding that she couldn't seem to care. Looking into those onyx eyes she had admired for so many years and seeing the overwhelming truth and love that were shining through, it just warmed her heart and soul.
She placed a soft kiss on Sev's lips and pulled back and gave him a warm smile. She could almost feel the relief pouring off of him. She mumbled into his chest, "Oh Sev, I will strive everyday to never forget it. I will also try to not jump to conclusions about things that you and Lu say. I know you didn't mean to hurt my feelings just now; I am honestly a bit overly sensitive, given all that has happened and I am so used to people saying hurtful things and not realizing how deep they were cutting me. Harry and Ron would do it all the time and my parents were good parents but they would only comment on things if I had let them down or disappointed them in some way. When I heard disappointed, I feared the worst and to be honest I didn't even give you a chance to say what you were disappointed in. I just assumed it was me."
Severus was quiet for a moment and then she felt his hand rubbing soft circles right under the hem of her vest. It felt so good to feel his strong hands moving in such a comforting way over her back. Then in a quiet and husky voice he spoke with his lips ghosting over the shell of her ear, "Oh kitten, we are still learning each other and learning to live outside of our pasts. Your requests are all valid and there is no reason not to stay home tonight and no reason we have to rush anything. We have the rest of our lives and I swear to you Hermione, I will spend every day starting today showing you only love, respect and how proud I am that you are my witch. I know Lu plans to do the same thing. We will learn more about each other as time moves forward and as we grow and as our relationship matures. Being overly sensitive right now is understandable Hermione, but don't apologize for your feelings or emotions to me. Not ever. They are yours and part of you, my kitten, and I want to know about all of them and feel them with you."
This was like a neon sign reminder for Hermione that this relationship, soulmates or not, was still just that a relationship and a new one at that. There would be bumps in the road, misunderstanding and arguments. All three of them had amazing, fierce tempers when provoked and she needed to remember that her wizards were still learning about her and she about them. She was going to say things that might hurt them without even thinking and they, as the last few minutes with Severus had proven, would do the same. Communication was key and she hoped that how upset she had gotten over the lack of it from Sev would help be a reminder for the stoic man. It had certainly served as a wake up call for her as well. it had reminded her that while she had a tendency to take things said at face value, her wizards were Slytherins through and through and, more often than not, there were several meanings behind every word or phrase they said.
She looked up and smiled at him again. This time he leaned in for one of the softest kisses Hermione had ever felt. Then he muttered against her lips. "Well let us get you back to spa day. Hopefully you didn't disagree with that portion of day. The evening plans will of course change but please allow us to pamper you, Hermione. You certainly deserve it and I think it can help with calming your magic a bit as well."
Hermione hummed in agreement and allowed herself to be led out of the room with Sev's arms securely around her shoulders. She snuggled a bit deeper into his hold and smiled. She had to admit she was quite looking forward to this spa day and had no problem being pampered after the past year on the run. She had a feeling a massage or two would do wonders for the knots in her back and shoulders that she had gotten from sleeping in that blasted tent for the past year. No, she would not mind this bit of pampering one bit and she had no problem letting her wizards plan this bit for her.
