Allie wasn't sure how much time had passed. It was really busy now and the hours always seemed to fly when it was like this. What she hadn't expected was for Kim Chang to come breezing through the door, heading straight for the back corridor, only to come back through a few minutes later, heading off into the night. With a bar full of thirsty customers, she didn't really have time to think about it, concentrating on the task at hand. When closing time arrived, Allie had almost forgotten about her colleague's impromptu visit, the raven haired woman claiming that she had forgotten her phone as she headed back out of the bar.

After wiping the bar down, she stuck her head through the office door, letting Boomer know that she had finished. Heading through into the staff room, she opened her locker, expecting to find a little gift waiting for her from Chang, but was pleasantly surprised to find nothing out of the ordinary there. Her head was in a spin, and she had no idea what the fuck Kim was up to. The photos from the other day of Bea and Jackson were still at the back of her mind. It was probably nothing, and she knew that she should talk to her girlfriend about them, but what if it wasn't nothing, what if Bea really was seeing Jackson? That was too painful to even think about, and for now, ignorance was bliss. Grabbing her bag and car keys, she headed back to the office to wait for Boomer.

Allie was exhausted by the time she got home, having had a restless night the previous evening. After feeding Cormack she grabbed a bottle of water, before heading straight to bed, falling asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow. She had been so tired that she hadn't even realised that Bea was home until she felt soft lips press against her neck, her girlfriend's arm slipping around her waist and pulling her in close. Wrapping her arm around the older woman, she cuddled up against her, drifting off into a peaceful slumber.

Waking up an hour later, Allie was happy to find that her girlfriend was still there with her. Bea was still sleeping, and the blonde made the most of the opportunity to study her uninterrupted. She didn't think it was possible for one person to be so beautiful both on the inside and out. That was until she met Bea of course. She really was on of a kind, the other half of Allie, and they fit together so perfectly.

Feeling like she was being watched, Bea opened her eyes, her gaze locking with Allie's as the blonde smiled at her. "Morning Alliecat" she said, her voice hoarse from sleep

"Morning baby. Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you"

"It's ok, I wanted to talk to you anyway"

"Yeah, what about?" Allie asked nervously

"Yesterday. Sorry we kept missing each other, my shift was a nightmare. I got your second message but we didn't get back until after four this morning and I didn't want to disturb you. How did it go at the studio?"

"Ok, they offered us a record deal. The guys are stoked"

"And what about you, how do you feel about it?"

"It's a fantastic offer, and most people would snap their hand off…" Allie said, her voice trailing off as she studied her girlfriend

"But…"

"But it's not what I want. I'm happy with how things are, and for the first time in my life I have a home, and a family, and I don't want to ruin that"

"We'll still be here, I'll still be here. Please don't dismiss this because you're worried about us. Nothing will change, I promise you. I love you and I'd wait forever for you Allie, I hope you know that" Bea replied, her fingers caressing the blonde's cheek as she gazed into her beautiful blue eyes

"I do, and I love you too, so much. But I hate the nights when you're working and I have to go to bed alone. The thought of being away from you for days, maybe weeks is too hard. I'm where I want to be, and I'm happy"

"I don't want to hold you back…"

"God Bea, you could never hold me back. You inspire me, make me a better person, and every second I spend apart from you is a second too long"

"Always such a charmer"

"Is it working?" Allie asked as her hand moved down the older woman's body, gasping when she felt the wetness between her legs. "So wet for me baby"

"Allie…" the older woman moaned as she felt her girlfriend's fingers ghosting over her clit

Allie spent the next couple of hours memorising every inch of her girlfriend's body, showing her just how much she loved her. Bea was always so responsive, her body bending towards her, chasing her touch. And every whimper, every moan she drew from the older woman sent a jolt of electricity straight to her core.

Bea was a mess. Her arms and legs felt like lead, and she could barely lift her head off the pillow. Allie had been relentless, and she had lost count of the number of orgasms the blonde had given her. She had tried several times to touch her girlfriend, but Allie had refused, saying that she wanted it to be all about her.

Despite her exhaustion, she needed to feel the blonde's soft skin, needed to see her come undone. Making the most of Allie's distraction, she crept into the bathroom, slipping into the shower enclosure and taking the younger woman into her arms. Spinning her around, she pushed her back against the tiled wall, her leg slipping between Allie's as her lips locked onto her neck. Feeling Allie tilt her head to give her better access, Bea nipped and sucked on her pulse point, loving the loud moan that fell from her lover's lips. Kissing her way down the blonde's body, she look her left nipple in her mouth, her fingers teasing the right one, before switching up.

Bea could feel Allie trying to turn them around as her lips trailed over her collar bone, but she wasn't having any of it. It was crazy, but she honestly thought that she would explode if she didn't touch the blonde soon. Pushing her back against the wall, she leaned in against her, holding the younger woman in place, her lips never leaving the blonde's neck.

"You just love roughing me up in the shower don't you" Allie gasped as she felt her girlfriend's hands return to her breasts

"I love doing everything to you in the shower baby" Bea replied, before dropping to her knees, her hands reaching for the blonde's hips as her tongue swept over her swollen clit.

They finally made it out of the bedroom, Allie heading for her studio while Bea went to make them something to eat. They had completely missed breakfast, not that either of them were bothered. After spending five minutes staring into the fridge in hope of finding some inspiration in its limited contents, Bea decided that she really should go shopping. Allie was busy working away in her studio, and not wanting to disturb her, stuck her head around the door to let her know where she was going.

Arriving back, she spotted Ash's car on the road in front of the house. She knew they would be coming over at some point, but hadn't expected them until later. She didn't mind, and loved having them over, she would just have to make extra for lunch.

After emptying the boot, she grabbed the last couple of bags from the back of the car, sighing in frustration as one of them split, emptying its contents all over the floor. After taking the other bag into the house and emptying it, Bea started to pick the groceries up from the floor of the car when something shiny caught her eye. Once all the groceries were back in the bag, she reached down, picking up what she now knew was a necklace. It wasn't one of hers, and she couldn't remember ever seeing Allie wearing it, but it did look familiar, she just couldn't place where she had seen it before. Slipping it into her pocket, she grabbed the last bag before heading back into the kitchen to put the groceries away.

Once the kitchen was tidy again, Bea headed through into Allie's studio to ask her about the necklace. As she raised her hand to push the door open she heard laughter. Not wanting to disturb the blonde, she turned to walk away, the door opening before she had gotten more than a couple of steps away.

"And where do you think you're running off to?" Allie asked as she grabbed her girlfriend's hand, pulling her back towards the open door

"Didn't want to interrupt"

"You're my favourite kind of interruption" the blonde replied, pulling her into a kiss, he arm slipping around the older woman's waist, holding her close. "The guys are here, we're just running through a couple of songs, come and say hi"

"Ok, just for a minute, I don't want to be in the way. Have you spoken to them about the record deal yet?" Bea asked. She knew that her girlfriend wasn't looking forward to the conversation, but she couldn't put it off forever.

"No not yet, but I will. We've still got a few days and I want to get everything clear in my head before I say anything" Allie replied, grabbing Bea's hand and pulling her into the room.

After spending half an hour with the guys, Bea headed back into the house to make them a late lunch, Ash confessing that they deliberately came over at this time in the hope that she would feed them. Half an hour later they came through into the house, Allie getting everyone a drink before helping Bea dish up the food. The blonde was working that night, and she wasn't sure how much time they would have later, so decided to make spaghetti bolognaise again. That way Allie could grab a snack before heading to the bar, and Ash had raved about it the last time she had cooked for them, so knew that they would approve. Lunch went down well, Bea receiving a string of compliments from her girlfriend's bandmates, and after helping to clean up, they headed off, giving Allie and Bea some time together before the blonde had to work.

After Allie had gone to work, Bea decided to go out for a run, having neglected her fitness regime recently, not that she didn't get plenty of exercise still, just not the kind you could do in public. Heading up the stairs, she got changed, the necklace falling to the floor as she removed her jeans. With the guys being over, it had completely slipped her mind. Placing it down on the bedside table, she changed into her running gear before heading out, making a mental note to speak to Allie about it later. She was planning on heading over to the bar, and wanted to surprise her girlfriend, so hadn't mentioned it. Yellow watch were on shift, so a few of her old crew were meeting up at the bar for a drink, and had asked her to go along. She had been a little apprehensive when she first got her promotion, not wanting yellow and red watch to think she was playing favourites, but the guys from teal watch were like family, and out of work, she could spend time with whoever she liked.

Kaz was fuming as she left the prison. How dare Harry talk to her like that, treat her in that way. She had expected him to be a bit upset, but the way he had spoken to her was not ok. Until now she had done everything he had asked of her, and so much more. But after what had happened the other day on shift, it didn't feel right going after Smith like that. Sure, they would never be the best of friends, but she had saved her arse, and she wasn't about to forget that in a hurry. She had expected Harry to be a little bit more understanding, concerned even, especially when she told him what had happened in the fire. But no, once again he had acted like a complete twat.

She still didn't understand why Bea and Allie together bothered him so much, and if he was over her, like he claimed to be, then it shouldn't matter who she was fucking. But when she had told him that she didn't want any part of it, whatever it was, he lost his shit. Luckily for Kaz she had quick reflexes, something that was somewhat of a necessity in her job, and had managed to avoid the table he had overturned, as well as the chair that had flown her way. He hadn't even given her a chance to explain. She wasn't giving up on him, on them, and still wanted a future with him outside of the prison walls. She just couldn't be a part of his little vendetta against Bea any more, not that she really knew what his plan was anyway.

He had always given her just enough information for her to do what he needed of her, while keeping his cards close to his chest, and after his rant today, knew that she wasn't the only one doing favours for him. It had to be Jake Stewart, he always was a slimy little fucker and Kaz had never trusted him. But he was an easy way in to Harry, and had been useful to her, although after the way that visit had gone, she wondered if she would be needing his services any more. She just hoped that once Harry calmed down he would see that she wasn't the enemy, and despite everything still loved him, and wanted to be with him.

Allie was in the back when Bea arrived at the bar, pulling up a stool beside Franky and Maxine she ordered a beer. She was a little frustrated to see that Kim was working, but suspected that Liz didn't have any other choice. Boomer had taken a couple of days off, and she knew that Shayne had gone to see Debbie for the night, leaving just three of them to hold the fort. Bea was working the following day, but after that they had a couple of days off together, and she couldn't wait. They had both been so busy recently, and hadn't spent as much time together as she would have liked. She missed spending her days with Allie, even if they were only doing everyday things, and couldn't wait to have her all to herself for a while. The blonde had been a little quiet recently, and she had put it down to the pressure the record label was putting on them. And she wasn't naïve enough to think that everything would run smoothly from now on. Telling the guys that she didn't want the same thing that they did was going to be tough on Allie. But she would help her any way she could, and be there to hold her hand.

She had only been there a few minutes when she overheard a conversation between Kim, and Liz, the raven haired woman asking Liz if she had found a necklace that she had lost the previous evening. As she described it Bea felt her stomach churn. It was the same one she had found in the back of the car. It had to be Kim's, it was too much of a coincidence for it not to be, but what the fuck had she been doing in the car in the first place?

By the time Allie came back out from the back, Bea's head was in a tailspin. She needed to talk to her girlfriend, find out what the hell was going on, but the bar was busy, and to make matters worse, she could feel Kim's eyes on her. She stayed for another hour, before letting Allie know that she had a headache and was going home, the blonde clearly concerned for her.

Allie was worried about her girlfriend. She had seemed fine earlier that afternoon, but clearly wasn't herself, she just wished that she knew what was bothering her. After Liz told her to take a break, she wandered over to the end of the bar where Franky was standing with the rest of her crew. Resting her hand on the brunettes arm to get her attention, she nodded towards the staff door, happy when her friend followed her through into the office.

Once they were away from the others, Allie turned to the brunette, concern written all over her face. "Kim didn't say anything to Bea did she?"

"Not that I know of, something was definitely bothering her though. She said she had a headache, but I know bullshit when I hear it"

"Yeah, something's not right with her, hasn't been for a few days. Have you noticed anything?"

"Like what?"

"I don't know, she's just been quiet, sneaking off to take phone calls, that sort of thing. I'm worried that she's getting bored of me. I can't lose her Franky, I just can't" Allie said, panic evident in her voice. The photos she found the other day, and her girlfriend's strange behaviour was worrying her. Things had been perfect that morning when they were in bed together, and again in the shower, but now Bea was back to acting all weird, and it was confusing the hell out of her.

"Hey, she feels a lot of things for you blondie, but bored definitely isn't one of them. In all honesty I never thought I'd ever see her like this. She was so broken after everything with chief wanker that I never thought she'd ever let her walls come down. But she did, and it shocked the hell out of us. But she wouldn't do that for anyone, so I figured that you must be pretty special. I'm glad you found each other and she's so in love with you that it makes me want to vomit most of the time" Franky replied, throwing her arm around the blonde. As much as she hated seeing Allie so insecure, it was also comforting to know that she loved Red that much, and that she was in as deep as Bea was. Plus she had an idea what the phone calls were about after overhearing a conversation between Red and Will the other day. And while she couldn't tell Allie, knew that the blonde was worrying for nothing.

After her chat with Franky, she felt a little better. Once the tattooed brunette had gone back through into the bar, she decided to send her girlfriend a message letting her know that she had her phone with her and to call if she needed her. Bea had said she was going home to bed so the blonde hadn't wanted to call and disturb her in case she was sleeping. She was just walking back through into the bar when she felt her phone vibrate in her pocket. Checking it, she saw she had a message from Bea.

It's just a headache, I'll be fine when I've had some sleep. Please don't worry x

Typing a quick message back, telling her that she would always worry, and that she loved her, Allie slipped her phone back into her pocket before heading back behind the bar, surprised at how busy it had gotten.

Kim had offered to stay behind after her shift ended as it was really busy. Liz had been apprehensive, but didn't really have a choice in the matter, there was no way that she and Allie could manage the number of thirsty patrons on their own. It was great for business, but she was worried about Allie being around Kim for longer than necessary. She had been keeping an eye on the raven haired woman, but so far she hadn't put a foot wrong. She was pleased to see that Kim had been keeping out of Allie's way whenever possible, making the shift a lot easier for all of them. Things had started to quieten down around eleven so Liz sent Kim home, thanking her for staying and helping out.

After closing up, they cleaned the bar in preparation for the following day. Once everything was done Allie headed for the staff room while Liz nipped into the office to grab the paperwork she needed. Allie had been surprised at how easy it had been working with Kim. There had been something different about her tonight. It was as though she had finally given up playing her little games, and she really hoped that was the case.

Grabbing her car keys, she moved to close her locker, almost missing the envelope on the top shelf. Sighing loudly, she picked it up, wandering over to the bench again and taking a seat before opening it. It felt like déjà vu as the familiar feeling of dread washed over her. She was sick of this, sick of the pathetic, fucked up game that Kim was playing, and she had no idea why either. She had never even shown the slightest bit of interest in anyone but Bea, so why her colleague thought there was something between them, was beyond her. Tipping the envelope, she grabbed the photo, bracing herself before turning it over.

It was Bea and Will again, and looked like it had been take on the same night as the others. She wasn't sure if they were coming together, or pulling apart, but it looked like they were about to kiss, if they hadn't already. Will's arms were around her girlfriend's waist, and Bea's around his neck. Throwing it down on the bench, Allie jumped up, ran to the bathroom and emptied the contents of her stomach into the toilet. Once she was happy that the remainder of her dinner wouldn't be making an appearance any time soon, she headed back into the staff room, gathering up the photo and envelope and stuffing them into her bag before slamming her locker shut.

She could feel the tears threatening to fall, but knew that she had to hold it together, until she made it to the safety of the car. She couldn't let Liz see her like this, and despite feeling like someone had just ripped her heart out, she had to be strong, for the next few minutes at least. She knew that if the older blonde suspected that something was wrong, she would ask questions. And Allie knew that she would only be trying to help, but if anyone were to show her even the slightest bit of sympathy, the dam would break. Putting her best game face on, she headed back towards the office to wait for Liz, hoping they would be out of there soon.

Allie's acting was clearly better than she thought. Either that or Liz was just tired, the older blonde thankfully not picking up on her distress. Jumping in the car, she decided to go for a drive. Bea was working the following morning, so would probably be asleep anyway. She drove around for a while with no real destination in mind, but after about twenty minutes found herself at the beach. Stopping the car, she climbed out, walking down onto the sand. Of all the beaches in the city she had to end up at this one, and to make matters worse she found herself in the exact spot that they had been in on her girlfriend's birthday. Sitting down on the sand, she let the tears fall, her thoughts going back to the last time they were here.

She wasn't sure how long she had been sitting there, minutes, hour's maybe. Her entire body felt like lead, and lifting her head seemed like such an effort. Forcing herself to stand, she steadied herself before walking back to the car, wiping away the tears that wouldn't stop falling. She was trying to stay positive, and maybe it really was something innocent, but she couldn't help but think that Kaz Proctor had been right all along. She was nothing but a worthless whore. Her parents didn't want her, neither did Mia. Why should Bea be any different? But she was different, she was special, and despite everything there was still a slither of hope that everything wasn't about to come crashing down around her. And she would cling on to that for as long as possible, she just had to.

Arriving home, she wandered quietly through the house and up the stairs, not wanting to wake her girlfriend. Slipping into their bedroom, her eyes gravitated towards her sleeping girlfriend. She loved her so much, and the thought of her with someone else was killing her. They needed to talk, but with the redhead being on shift in a few hours, knew it would be a wait. Leaning against the wall, she studied the older woman, a small frown on her face as she slept. She was so beautiful, and Allie was praying to god that there was some kind of misunderstanding. The thought of being without her was too hard, and she could feel the tears threatening to fall again. Heading into the bathroom she brushed her teeth and got undressed before wandering back into the bedroom. Climbing into bed, she made sure to keep a bit of distance between them, knowing that if she felt Bea's gentle touch, it would break her.

Bea woke up just before one, and was surprised to find Allie's side of the bed empty. Thinking that it must have been a busy night at the bar, she nipped to the bathroom quickly before getting back into bed, falling asleep again pretty much straight away.

Allie climbed into bed a while later, waking her. Glancing over at the clock, she saw that it was just after three. Allie had never been this late, and she hoped that everything was ok. What surprised her the most was that the blonde turned onto her side, facing away from Bea. Usually she would cuddle up against her the second she got into bed, but tonight she seemed to be trying to stay as far away from her as possible. Reaching out, Bea tried to cuddle up to her girlfriend, the blonde moving further away from her. Allie had been a little distant the past few days, and she knew that her girlfriend was worried about breaking the news to the guys about the record deal, but she had never shut her out like this, and Bea was beginning to wonder if there was more to it than just band stuff. She had tried to tell herself that there had to be a perfectly innocent explanation as to how Kim's necklace came to be in their car, but Allie's behaviour was starting to worry her. There could only be one reason as to why she was shying away from her touch, and the thought of that made Bea feel sick. Trying again, she rested her hand on the younger woman's hip, her heart breaking as Allie rolled over so she was out of reach.

The distance between her and Allie felt like miles. She couldn't understand why the blonde was being so cold towards her, especially after something had clearly happened with Kim, innocent or not. It didn't make sense, why would she go anywhere near Chang after everything she had done, all the lies she had told. That's if they were lies. Maybe she was bored with their relationship, and Kim was closer to Allie's age than she was. Mentally scolding herself for jumping to conclusions, she tried to get some sleep, knowing that she needed to give her girlfriend the benefit of the doubt.

Bea hadn't slept well. She must have drifted off at some point, and woke to find herself curled up in her girlfriends embrace. At some point, Allie had gravitated towards her, wrapping her arms around her as she slept. Having the blonde so close made her feel safe again, like everything was just one big misunderstanding. The feeling didn't last though, and as she felt Allie stir behind her, the little bit of hope she had slipped away along with her girlfriend's arm. The blonde pulling away from her as though she'd been burned.

She couldn't breathe, and she could feel her body trembling, not realising straight away that she was crying. Holding her hand over her mouth to stop the sob that was threatening to escape, she laid there for a while, making sure Allie was still asleep before getting out of bed. Bypassing the en-suite, she headed for the main bathroom, needing to put a bit of distance between her and her girlfriend. Turning the shower on, Bea stepped under the stream of water, letting her tears fall freely.

She had done this for years. Harry saw it as a weakness, and would take great pleasure in beating her if she cried in front of him. But in the shower, where her tears could merge with the water, it didn't count. If she couldn't see them, they didn't exist, and for a few minutes she allowed herself to fall apart. There had to be something going on with Kim, why else would Allie be so cold with her. But it didn't make any sense. The blonde was so gentle with her the previous day, so loving, and had taken her places that only Allie could. How could she lay there and tell her she loved her, when all this time she was playing around behind her back.

Bea knew that she had taken a big risk when she gave the younger woman her heart, and despite her best efforts, couldn't stop herself from falling head over heels in love with her. But it was starting to look like she had made another mistake, another colossal fuck up. She had no idea what she had done to deserve this, but maybe Harry had been right all along. Maybe she wasn't worthy of anyone's love. Sinking down to the shower floor she sobbed, crying for all the shit he had put her through over the years, for Allie, and for what she was sure that she was about to lose.

Turning the water off a while later, she took a deep breath before stepping out of the shower enclosure and grabbing a towel. She was done with being weak, done with crying over other people. Her marriage to Harry had almost destroyed her, and she'd be damned if she let the same thing happen again. She still had Debbie, her friends and her job. And if her suspicions about Allie and Kim turned out to be true, she would force herself to get out of bed every morning, put one foot in front of the other, and try to make it through one day at a time, no matter how much it hurt. With her armour firmly in place, she wandered back through into the bedroom, took some clothes from the wardrobe quietly so she didn't wake the blonde, picked her wallet up and headed for Debbie's room. After dressing quickly, she made her way down the stair to grab a quick drink before picking up the keys to her bike. Glancing at the clock, she saw that it was just gone five thirty. She wasn't due at the station until seven, but hoped that a ride on the bike would clear her head a little. She needed to talk to Allie, but knew that it would be twenty four hours before she would get the chance. They had a couple of days off together, and she was determined to get to the bottom of it, whatever the outcome.

Allie heard Bea leave. She had been awake for a while now and it didn't look like sleep would be coming anytime soon. She wasn't sure what time she had eventually fallen asleep earlier, but waking up with her arms around the redhead had startled her. It had taken every ounce of self-control to pull away from her, wanting nothing more than to wrap her arms around her and never let go. But she couldn't be that close to her when she was feeling so vulnerable. Turning away from Bea, she closed her eyes, hoping to stop the tears escaping. She wasn't sure how long she had been lying there for when she felt her girlfriend get out of bed, but she was pretty sure that she was crying. Allie felt awful, and wanted to follow the older woman out of the room, take her in her arms and tell her that everything was going to be ok. But she wasn't sure that it would, and right now she didn't feel strong enough to pretend.

/

Sorry, the timing of this chapter couldn't have come at a worse time…especially after the new trailer for S5.

I need to get my two 'T's' ready for the first episode, Tanqueray and tissues! L