Shanna's car, true to its nature, pulls to a jerky stop. My head spins as it slams against the head rest again. I look out the window to see Abraham's just down the road. A knot churned in my stomach as I looked at the people loitering around the edges of the house. The sun was just starting to set and still the house was near capacity. All of them will be there. Everyone knows now…what will they think? Panic starts to flood through me. I flash a look to Shanna who gives me an encouraging smirk.

"Calm down Blake. Jesus you're like a puppy dog." She soothed, patting me on the head. I sighed as I could feel myself calming some. If Shanna, one of the most important people in my life could accept me then maybe others would too.

"Thanks." I mutter before taking another long breath as I glance back at the house.

"Blake it won't be that bad. I doubt anybody will really care." I look back to Shanna with a newfound fear. But what if they do? Can I handle people knowing? The thought of people knowing about me and my personal life, about my feelings made me want to squirm.

"But how do you know?" I ask. A familiar smile, that smile that seems to always lighten my mood, inches across her face.

"You know what Blake, for once I think you need to take a play from Michael. Fuck everyone." Shanna says with a fierce sort of conviction.

I laugh, "Jeeze Shanna, language." She smirks before sticking her tongue out.

"Special circumstances. And you know what Blake, if anyone gives you crap tell me and I'll make sure they never say another word about anyone." Shanna grins again, I laugh thinking of little Shanna being a fierce fighter. But the message, that Shanna really would stand by me just made my insides…a weird sort of tingly.

"You know I love you right?" I ask pulling her in for a hug.

She sighs into my neck, "Was there ever any doubt? Now come on, let's go party it up!"

I laugh as Shanna does a little dance as she exits. But the thought of entering the house reenters my mind. I try to push the dread away but it still lingers at the back edges. Regardless I force myself out of the car, Shanna walks giddily toward the house but I trail behind, my speed about equivalent to a snail's.

When it's taken me nearly a two minutes to move about a quarter to the house Shanna seems to notice and comes barreling back to me. "Come on slowpoke!" She teases a few times as she makes a real effort to bring me to the party. I don't resist, but I don't exactly cooperate either.

On the way we pass several people who glance off at us. Some brisk, however a few glances last until they're almost glares. Although to be fair with Shanna literally pushing me forward, it might be a tad bit of an attention getter. But still with every one of those glances I can't help but wonder if they know. Do they look threatening? Accepting? Or maybe I'm just a paranoid weirdo.

Finally we manage to reach the door. No need to ring the doorbell as the front door is wide open with the music vibrating out the door. I stagger for a bit as I contemplate how hard it is the bob and weave my way through the crowd of teens, most of who I don't have any idea of who the hell they are. Do they even go to our school? Knowing Abraham probably not. I try to hold onto Shanna so we don't get separated. She complies, hooking her elbow against my arm like an anchor for me to lean on. I still can't help but try to see everyone's reactions. I have noticed a lot more glances since I've entered. Although thankfully none have made any actually advances. But the real problem was with the people I actually knew. I was looking for my friends, hoping to gauge some of their reactions…even if any were bad I needed to know.

"Blake?" A faint voice penetrates the music. My head pops up as I search wildly for the caller. I don't see anyone familiar hanging around here. My hopes drop some, I can't exactly say I wasn't hoping that someone I know might come up to me. But I'm still being paranoid.

Shanna and I manage to weave our way out the back door and onto the patio. I finally feel like I can breathe as I relax against the door. Shanna rests next to me, she leans over and hands me a cold one. I sigh as I take a nice long chug. Alright, well at least this could be worse. At least no one had made a stink about it.

Suddenly Shanna seems to seize up. "Come on Blake let's go back inside." She hooks my arm and nearly drags me to the door. I halt my feet and turn to see what made Shanna flip out.

"What's wrong! Hold on, stop dragging me." She tugs uselessly against me. And then suddenly I see it. Right by the edge of the house I saw a cluster of my "friends". Aylin and Charlie barely hid him but right there standing by the edge was Michael.

My heart stopped as I saw him. I hadn't seen him…in what felt like forever. He was lazily sipping a beer as he relaxed against the wall. Aylin and Charlie seemed to be trying to cheer him up, but he seemed to have a blank expression glued to his face. And right then he chose to look around and guess what he found me, staring at him. Quickly I avert my eyes and try to act natural.

"I'm sorry," Shanna says with an hand on my arm.

"It's fine Shanna. He can do whatever he wants. He's not my problem anymore." I say softly. She gives me a sympathetic look before glancing off in their direction again.

"Hold on," Shanna orders me before storming off in their direction.

Aw fuck.