My brother's mass today was solemn.
A lot of his friends came, along with the entire family.
Mom and Dad cry both at the church and at the gravesite.
Bella didn't cry at all…I felt a little sad at remembering how Evan was at one point my idol and how I used to want to be just like him, until I found out who he really was.
It doesn't mean that I don't miss him, or the good times we had together.
But I've come to accept that he wasn't the man I thought he was.
Bella's anger over it all still lingers like a glowing ember, I can still see it in her eyes from time to time, but it is no longer the raging fury she had coursing through her for so long.
And, I don't know if it's my own wishful thinking or reality when I see her glancing my way with a small smile on her face when she thinks I'm not looking.
Maybe it's a sign that she's ready to move forward.
Maybe she's finally letting it all go.
Maybe I should hold on to hope just a little while longer that I might get a happily ever after of my own.
