All TMNT characters are copyrighted by Mirage studios and were created by Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird. White Night Fantasy by Nightwish and Phantom Sound & Vision record company. Yoma Kazoe Uta by Sakashita Masatoshi. Wind by Akeboshi and JVC Victor. Naturaleza muerta by Mecano and Sony International. Figlio Perduto well? I guess it goes to Sara Brightman, Wea International, Goethe and Beethoven that one has a convoluted story apparently.


"Trust me, I am like you… With me, you won't have to hide, you won't have to do anything you don't want to do, just focus on me… No doubts… No regrets... Power to change things and make the universe tremble! We make our own rules… We are truly free." The Utrom said.

The enchantress came to me and said:
Meet me at the lake tonight


Object of Affection

"Why had Leo kissed him and been so...?" Don shuddered at the memory of the brief despaired glance she had given him when he finally mustered the guts to push her away successfully. She was probably reacting to him as empaths sometimes did, he tried to convince himself, as Leatherhead had told him regarding why Utroms being innate empaths avoided non Utroms, why he had to stay behind, because it had been like the beginning of the feverish dreams he had had on the peak of Leo's season, right, even a private lake? Because she definitely was not ready for that. It was not what he wanted. Well, he did, but not like that. He wanted more than that, much more. He wanted …? He was not even longer sure of what he wanted. On one hand as hard as it was to recognize; he was still too attached to the mirage of the invulnerable Leonardo-niisan with whom he had grown up with, and usually leaned on… And more often than not, abused. Not even getting with the whole family thing implications, regardless of their lack of a blood bond, they still were… family? On the other hand, this Leo the temptress which puberty had revealed was..? He was human...turtle after all, not made of ice-cold logic like the Utroms, but still, their conduct was bound by human standards, right?… Well, it was hard though as their human role model seemed to have the same dilemma and well, it had ended... well, tragically. He gasped. But still, her reaction had been…

"Right, who would you want me to be?" she had said releasing him and then looked at him teary-eyed for an instant and then hugged herself, shivering and then collapsed on her front, trying in vain to pull her limbs and head to her shell in what he assumed would be the equivalent of a fetal position for turtles, going into a full close down before his very eyes from which she still had not come back..

She had been like that for while becoming even more uneasy if he tried to approach, less touch her. So he had resorted to trying to talk to her.

He had been so clueless as he talked to her with his back on her. "Leo, it is not that I don't think you are… I mean…" he had said, trying to call her back and organize his thought. "You are… I mean, I am… I really do l... lov… I am an idiot but, I mean, I don't want to …hurt… Leo, I mean, you must understand that you are too important for me."

"You came for me?" She had hissed suddenly, standing up clumsily and putting some space between them. It was only later he saw the purple portal that had suddenly opened. At first, he had flinched at the bitterness of her tone, he had thought she was spatting at him again as it had become customary lately and he was reluctant to face her until it hit him that she was not making sense and he turned just as she raised her voice and he noticed how far from him she had walked. "Trust?… No doubts?… No regrets?... Change things? Own rules?… Free?! Things you don't even believe!… Do you even know the meaning of the word? You are nothing like me! But…What does it matter right?" She had laughed sarcastically and started that song as a sort of countdown approaching steadily towards the ominous portal.

Hitotsu, Hitoyo no koi naraba
(One,
it's a love in one generation)
Futatsu, Futari de jigoku e to
(Two, the two of us go to Hell)
Mittsu, Mina o koroshitemo
(Three, even though we kill everybody)
Yottsu, Yomi e no michi-shirube
(Four, Signpost for the land of the dead)

He had gotten up as fast as he could and ran towards her, but he had felt that chest tightness again it felt as if he was running in water, that thing had given a very bad gut feeling.

"Wait! Leo! Wake up!" He had screamed "Please! Wake up! Don't leave me please I... I love you!"

The heaviness in the air suddenly cleared as Leo emitted a half-hearted laugh, stopping. "Ai? Doko de sono kotoba wo kiita, Imi ga wakaranai. (Love? Where did I hear that word? It's meaning I don't understand) Watashitachi was sono imi o nagai aida ni wasureta.… (We forgot it's meaning a long time ago) Instinct, that is all," the hazel brown eyed turtle said, looking at the distance. "Aside from that, just another sword; just another word."

Word?

"Damn it, why is so hard for you to understand...? To me, you have always been home." The other replied and managed to tackle her down just in time.

"Donnie?" she had said finally with a childish tone. "Where are we? Do you hear it? I think it's calling me again, so sad, so haunting; just like that time in the temple…" The marks on her shone and her tone became less childish her breathing hitching and she managed, between gasps. "You are much too kind Donnie, I don't deserve it, let's hope you don't regret it," and cuddling against him added, back in that childish tone, "Tired, breathing has been difficult lately." and then she had fallen asleep in his arms.

Crestfallen soul
Rest for this night
Love is here
Right here under my wing


It was ironic how peaceful the mighty warrior's face on the stretcher before him looked lying on her plastron, deeply sedated apparently. He had grown accustomed to her defiant glare, after all, her comforting presence; he sighed. He had unintentionally grown too attached to this creature in their brief time together; funny looking really if he thought it carefully, so why was it so..? Troublesome! It would be so easy, he thought, to simply carry and spirit the creature away, as he had considered at first, as he should have done… Relieved? To find out it was not in any immediate risk; though disappointed that her general aspect had not improved, nor had the general feeling around it, as he had hoped it would. What was about this creature? Why did he restraint? Well, he was quite used to take by force, not to wait. "Waiting is wasting for people like me."

There were certain substances he could use, of course, certain quack annoying healer he could call; but he did not want just another puppet, after all, he had plenty of those. Free will was such a fickle, yet a precious thing, he thought, moving the blue laces to inspect the scar on the shell he had inflicted some years back. A deep wound, he thought with a chill, a lasting mark, though removing it with nanites would be quite easy yet, no doubt. But even if it would show his goodwill, he had felt reluctant, so easy to simply wipe the creature's memories and replace them, but he knew better not to meddle with another dragon's memories. Patience was an Utrom virtue he was quickly running out of regarding this affair. He did not even know why he was here after all. Karai is probably wondering if I am under some sort of spell these days, so similar and yet so different. He laughed. Maybe I am, after all. What was it he wanted exactly from this creature that now he did not dare fathom it?

He looked with contempt at the unconscious, paralyzed, crocodile mutant before him, who would not remember a thing. It would be rather easy to impose his will on him, no doubt, from his conditioning induced with a long interaction with Utroms, not so unlike the inconvenient guardian he had disposed of in a raging flare some years back. Empathy is such an annoying thing and that had been an event that had become a true nuisance really. Would the crocodile react the same if told the truth, he wondered, amused. Toying with the mind of other creatures could be fun sometimes, but he contained, he had promised after all. However, on the other hand, had he not done that…Well, fate was odd indeed. So unlike the one he was currently tending, he thought with disdain, that lowly creature was not worthy to be the one taking care, the wretched place was not fit either, it was too dark, damp, cramped and filthy. A turtle's habitat? No, this creature certainly had enjoyed his humble mountain retreat home, he was certain of that; so far from other sentient creatures' annoying presence.

"Don't you have any regrets?" she had asked.

"Do you really have them or are you trying to convince yourself you should?" he had replied. Why did he care about that? It had been centuries since he had really cared about another's opinion, save for public relations, as Karai called them.

"Regardless of what you think, I do keep my promises after all, warrior. I truly don't understand you, why do you do this to yourself? They are nothing like you, they don't deserve you… They aren't worthy of being in your presence, less of your attention. You are just confused. You know, unlike me, you would have made a fine Utrom, a mood balancer. That is why you try so hard probably. A great unintentional peace offering by those fools; and had someone like you been there back then, instead of their senseless preaches, I think I would have endured the council blabber and conflicting orders a bit longer. But only fools entertain themselves with absurd thought." He said as he carefully cut the laces of the blue bandanna and slid it away. "I remember telling you not to hide in my presence, truly reckless another unforeseen variable you have placed on the table now..." He continued, looking at the second bracelet and placed his hand over her forehead and then the bracelet he had given her, making her gasp. "You have the information now regarding that question. Why would I want another brawler mindless brute? I had Hun and many others before, they are dime a dozen. Would I want an acrobat, I could always go to the circus, you know? At least, they have some discipline and, though brilliant minds are hard to get, I have gotten two in this decade and many more you are not familiar with. They tend to make little noise. But someone like you… Once in millennia! You are more special than you allow yourself to think. Set a date and place and I will be glad to attend a spectacle to behold, no doubt… I am quite eager to hear your true voice again and maybe continue were we left last time; your mind is quite an interesting place after all, linking yourself like that was incredibly cunning. Unlinking so abruptly however, was incredibly foolish: you nearly killed us both, my dear. But I guess that was not completely unintentional on your part right? You do know that I am reasonable; so the deal still stands on the table; but my patience is running quite thin these days." And, with saying that, he set the bandanna on fire in his very hands.

"Time to go!" The time Mistress emphasized; draped in a cape, holding her staff.

"Osaraba da ore no taisetsuna Kaguya kono hoshi no mirai anata no ryo te ni motte imasu" he said finally, giving the arriving turtles paralyzed in the air a sarcastic sneer. (See you my precious Kaguya the future of this star is in your hands)


Y el mar murmura en su lenguaje (And the sea in its language mumbles)

Maldito Pescador! ( Cursed fisherman)

Despidete de ella no pienso compartir su corazón (Say goodbye to her, for I will not share her heart)


Don shook his head, he could have sworn that, for a minute, there was someone else there, near Leo, but he could not remember who exactly it was. It was familiar but not in a comforting way and since everything had been so upside-down lately, that could not be good but… It was as though his mind was playing tricks on him.

Leatherhead gave him a concerned glare when he insisted.

"Donatello, do you feel all right?"

"You were not answering?" Don replied.

"Well, I guess there was some kind of interference or malfunction, my friend. I assure you everything is fine and has been for a while. No changes."

"What? Another panic attack, big brain? I honestly don't understand what…" Raph teased, the first time he had since their return. He could still remember the glare Raph had given him when the Daimyo finally managed to pull them from wherever they had been in that cave as he held the unconscious Leo in his arms. He could not identify it, nor had he really cared. He had had a strained relationship with Raphael for a long time. It had been a while since they saw eye to eye on anything that had been taken to the limit during Leo's multiple timeouts in wherever she had been, they were too dissimilar. It was too much to ask really, though they could sometimes put away their differences regarding engines at which Raph had talent, Don reluctantly recognized; considering his Nightwatcher bike. Raphael approach was more technical than his. The hothead, who was so pragmatic that he did not care about the whys as long as it worked, which sometimes led to risky improvisations risks Don was not willing to take regarding the lair's security. He imagined that, had Raphael been human, he might have pursued a job, or a least a hobby, in a car or bike workshop. He could not imagine Raph attending college. He just was not cut for that, standing long hours in lectures, researching, it simply wasn't his style; like Mikey. It was not they were stupid or anything, as Don sometimes liked to think: "Mikey talks, we don't call him intelligent!" The red-clad was actually more street-smart than him, it was just he lacked the patience for it. He had even less than Mikey, that had been how the younger brother had scored to the finals of the Nexus, after all, getting on the red clad's temper, He would have probably enjoyed that show had… he been able to… cursed Déjà vu! He thought, looking at the unconscious Leo. Leo! What would they do without her? He contained from rushing to her side; she had always acted as a sort of cushion between the three of them, forcing them to have activities together, making sure, even more than Splinter sometimes, that the lair was a sort of home for everyone: "Home? No… believe me, it is not." Except she, apparently, felt needed and appreciated, the first time had been hard, they must have looked really pathetic upon her return right? Raph and Splinter could not really brag about their leading skills either, but the second and the… third, had his father really not expected her return as she seemed to think? No, his father was as distressed as he was, he just showed it differently. Regarding Leo's condition, it was quite clear now how he had taken refuge on the soaps and probably why he had not tried to make things as though Leo was there during her prolonged absence.

During her absence; it had become quite clear that, aside from being turtles, the three remaining brothers had less in common he ever imagined. He had even daydreamed of asking April for permanent asylum on some days. You choose your friends, not your family after all. And usually, the males were bound to eventually leave the nest right? Well, for turtles, everyone left the nest though. As had happened in that nightmarish future vision universe or whatever it had been. Though, for four mutant not so teenage turtles like them, it had never seemed like a viable option: As children, he had actually envied them: Raphael's brawl, it still made him envious sometimes. How Mikey seemed to avoid punishment using his wit and charisma. And of Leo, of course. How she could stand and make them believe everything was fine, that even the most ludicrous plan had a shot. None of his brothers would have let get her hurt would they? He thought, remembering how Raph had stood between her and the shredder more than once, a prowess he could nod brag about, he thought, starting to notice something disturbing, as he noticed LH computer watch.


e oh padre
Tu non hai visto
Re degli elfi
Eccolo la

This was so freaking awkward! Raph thought, It was not that he had been avoiding everyone lately in favor of busting skulls solo, because talking to Casey did not seem like an option either, as little time as possible in the lair; it was just he felt so powerless watching Leo in that weird mental state, coming in and out of consciousness. It was as though Leo had disappeared. He had not fully processed Don's words in the Nexus. Leo a… girl? It was just so bizarre. Yeah, he still hoped this was a freaking nightmare from which he would wake up soon or something. Having been repelled from the blue-clad turtle in the Nexus had hurt a lot. Because he was convinced it had been intentional on Leo's part, he thought, remembering Leo's cold glare as she waved her hand repelling him. That glare! And lately, he had noticed how unsteady his mere presence made Leo, deterring him from approaching. Not that there was anyone there to approach. He had not been privy on the details and he really did not want to know the full details of Leo and Don's relationship, whatever that was, it was obvious there was one. Don had been the only one who had been able to approach back then and that thing the healers from the Nexus did. An anchoring bond? A reason to remain? If they were not close before, that definitely counted. He also could not help but feel guilty: every word he had said before now weighted like lead, and did Leo really think he would…. "So I guess I lost… Ugh! I am at your mercy then." Harm? Force to? It was so… "

"You said something about a deal Raph?" Don asked, still unable to completely let that mirage he had experienced go.

"Donatello!" Splinter interrupted. He did not want to continue a discussion in front of Leatherhead. Things were already too strained between his sons already. He felt so lost and confused and….guilty.

"I am talking to you Raph!" Don insisted.

Raph grunted. "Nothing. Some rumors about the Foot reaching some sort of deal with the blue demon, nothing specific. It is odd, ya know? During the whole time Fearless... Leo was out… Well, they practically disappeared from the city. Rumor was Karai had been ordered to pull back by some bigwigs from Japan."

"And you did not mention it before because…?" Don continued.

"'Cus I don't believe a word about that. Rumors from stoned purple dragons and I did not want to stir thing further, but who knows? It is freaking obvious Fearless does not trust anyone but you right?" he snarled.

Splinter shivered. To be honest, he also felt something was not right, but he could not really tell what it was. And, remembering Karai's ominous words to Leonardo after the fight against the generals… How had he been so blind and stubborn? He had spent a lot of time in Leonardo's bedroom, trying to find answers in the previous days and was still shocked by the bleakness of the place, even though Leonardo had resided for at least 3 months there, it still felt as empty as when she was away. In a sense, it felt as though his son had not returned at all from that time, 2 years ago. But from that to believe that creature had been released again, or that his obedient child was to become…. The Ancient One had warned him. Revenge does tend to bring unforeseen things, Splita-san. The Daimyo's words had been anything but encouraging, as he finally found a way to retrieve Donatello and Leonardo. "The anchoring bond is a temporary solution, my friend. The seals on your child are taking their toll on her life energy, and I don't even take into account the weakening factor, since the time of my son's unforgivable actions. The poison he used was not completely countered. To tell the truth, it is a wonder she did not show signs before. But removing them might end up causing more harm. They had been on her too long. There is something else, though I am not entirely sure. It is against the rules of the nexus to interfere, but some traits remind me of these two former champions, dragon vessels. Dragons are forces of nature, my dear friend, incomprehensible creatures that sometimes descend on this dimension for unfathomable reasons; those former champions… There, you seem to have so much aversion towards one who was a vessel for a yang one, unleashed over 10,000 years ago into your dimension by a power-hungry race. They did pay for their insolence. Dragons are not intrinsically evil though, but they tend to be harbingers of change or destruction. They are intrinsically bound to the origin of the nexus. It is said that the Nexus was created in a dragon clash…. I guess it depends on how they are guided."

But still, his brilliant son was right, he had taken many decisions regarding Leonardo based on assumptions.

"It is not the student's place to say when a lesson has been learned." he had said firmly. "It is the student's place to listen and learn!" Had that been a wise choice, he now wondered, alienating his already alienated child. But had there been any other way? He knew Leonardo had not truly forgiven him for sending her away. But he could not deal with her out of control.

"But, Master, I don't want a new sensei." She had protested. "I'm happy here with you. I know there's so much more you can teach me." The following time Leonardo had not even argued back, as though she had just expected it. Should he have told her back then why, would anything have changed? Splinter shook his head. He knew what he was supposed to do as a master for the well being of the clan though but… "I'd rather to it by your order or hand than by those Earthbound spiritsShinkenshobu with the Foot leader." What foot leader? An ominous thought regarding Leo's 5-week absence invaded him. "But it would be…"

His musings were interrupted by a concerned voice which said: "Hi Splinta-san, how ya doing?"


Author's notes

I still live and haven't given up. Sorry for the long wait.

Thanks again to Lady-Kassy for her continuous support and beta to this story.

Special thanks to carmonator for his very extensive review, deathoftoast I always enjoy your reviews: the image of Bishop twiddling his thumbs made me laugh yeah were was he? Dozer the short circuit idea is good it brought me back to my original texts before chapter 20. Lady Kae poetry? Wow, I am flattered hopefully next chapter will have more action bear with me some health issues lately: possibly undergoing surgery soon, got the flu, regular variety no fever but still, so inspiration and time have not been at it's fullest I even got a dreadful mockbuster of Terminator by accident! and nearly lost choosing privileges, I blame it entirely on the flu and intentional deceptive placing by the local blockbuster.

The original text was double-spaced and neatly aligned, however whenever I click save, it seems the spacing and alignment go haywire repeatedly, the verses refused to be centered even manually, so if anyone knows how to fix it let me know.

Karai´s words at the end of movie do stir some doubts everyone seems oblivious to in the movie, because there is only one way to interpret it those past things that will haunt back, unfortunately it would not be solved since the future movie will apparently retell the original one, and I am not altogether sure which TMNT universe it follows though having read finally the premovie comics (Leo's is pretty bloody isn't it? not precisely PG) they do fit in the 2003 timeline including the Lost season due to the appearance of the Ancient One and the Tribunal, still have no idea of the medallion meaning. Pushing it a bit could include the FF but definitely not the BttS the height difference and Karai being invited to April's wedding was too much.

Now addressing a plot hole I will be using: why did the Utrom Shredder killed Hamato Yoshi personally? To the series continuity it might not mean much but I mean in the comic it was a revenge of sorts for Nagi, in the old series rivalry and did not actually kill him but in the 2003 series? did he need to prove something? Yeah, you invaded my complex now you die! might be a valid reason; but my bet is he would have obtained any information he desired from him with more time he has some practice, after all, a rage flare is the only explanation I could come up with because is not that clear on the series.

Dragons in European and Semitic lore are evil yes Saint George slain one according to legend, though I loved the Dragon Heart version of dragon's more, but in Chinese and Japanese lore they are more likewise creatures related to forces of nature, which cannot be seen entirely as friend or foe but rather they have their own interest. In the series I was intrigued on one hand they were surprised (or jealous?) that Leo had a dragon avatar, but then again the Tengu looked like one, as well as the one who tried to freed the original and the original Saki had one, and they apparently acquire their own to battle their former comrade and at the end all the turtles end up with dragon avatars so they used the concept rather randomly.

Thanks for reading and reviewing I do read all of them.