Chapter 54
His Reasons
The next morning dawned calm and clear.
Crocodile opened his eyes and yawned.
He sat up and did a mental survey of his body.
His abdomen and leg were extremely sore, but he didn't feel feverish anymore and the pain was quite tolerable.
"That's more like it," he muttered, "It's been long enough."
Looking over at the neighbouring bed, he saw that Daz was still sleeping.
Just then, he noticed the silence.
There was no sound of waves or of birds.
"What's going on?" he grumbled, easing himself slowly into a sitting position.
He lowered his right foot down and put some weight on it. A streak of pain shot through his calf, making him clench his teeth.
Damn, he thought, I still can't put any pressure on it.
Just then Daz woke up with a stretch.
He glanced over at Crocodile.
"She said that you should stay in bed," he grunted, standing and yawning.
Crocodile frowned and threw a hard stare in Daz's direction.
The knife man pointed to his table.
"But she left that for you anyways," he added.
Following his pointing finger, Crocodile saw a thick wooden cane leaning against his nightstand.
He let a smirk grace his lips.
"How considerate of her," he muttered.
Maybe she's finally gotten over her little temper tantrum…
He reached over and picked it up. Putting it beside his weakened foot, he slowly began standing, keeping most of his weight on the cane.
"Perfect," he said as he straightened his shoulders, "Now let's see where the little brat has taken us."
Daz exited the room and Crocodile followed, albeit a little slower than usual.
"I hope she slept last night," muttered Daz, "She was close to collapsing yesterday."
Crocodile raised his eyebrows.
"Are you concerned for the brat?" he asked snarkily.
Daz's back stiffened.
"Her screams are so high pitched and annoying. I haven't had a good nights sleep in a week," he muttered over his shoulder.
Crocodile frowned.
He had been woken up many times in the past nights, greeted by Hawke's terrified screams. In fact, the first few times it had happened, he had thought he was still dreaming and his fever was making him hallucinate. Recently, he had noticed her hands getting more and more unsteady when she changed his bandages.
I guess I expected as much, he thought, there was that scene she made when she woke up and her little "attack" after that.
Crocodile had indeed been woken by Hawke's whimpers and cries while she lay on the floor beside his bed many days ago. He had meant to slam his fist down, to punish her for annoying him with those pitiful sounds. But instead his hand had come to rest lightly on her shoulder. Unfortunately, the movement had caused multiple waves of pain to shoot through his torso and he couldn't bring himself to move his arm back up. He had settled for closing his eyes and waiting for the pain to pass. While he was doing this, he had heard Hawke scolding herself and then she had moved his arm up to the bed.
With his comfort returned, he thought it pointless to try and converse with the girl, so he let himself rest. The soft sounds of the brush moving across the planks that followed had lulled the sand man into a light sleep.
He had woken again to find her going through his pockets, the little thief. He had initially been furious, but it turned out he was too tired to care about the invasion of his privacy. He found himself feeling quite calm about the whole situation, despite the fact that he hadn't intended for Hawke to see that photograph so soon. Calm, at least up until the brat had attempted to deny him his cigar.
Crocodile put his hand on the door frame and frowned, realizing that he still hadn't had his smoke.
Daz shot a glance back at him, pausing.
He probably thinks I'm still too weak to be moving around, the bastard, Crocodile thought.
"Hurry up!" he snapped, "You're in my way!"
The two men made their way out onto the deck.
As his eyes got used to the bright sunlight, Crocodile held the rail and looked out at the sea.
He stared at the unmoving water.
"She didn't steer us there, did she?" he turned to Daz with a look of annoyance mixed with anger.
"I hate the Calm Belt," was Daz's reply.
Crocodile turned around stiffly.
"Hawke!" he bellowed.
There was no answer.
"I'm amazed we haven't been attacked by sea kings," Daz muttered when there was no reply.
The pair made their way around to the stern.
Hawke was sitting on the deck, slumped against the rail, and clutching an oar that was lying at her feet.
"She's fast asleep," muttered Daz.
Crocodile stared down at the girl, smirking slightly at the hint of relief in his first mate's voice.
"Is she so desperate to see Strawhat that she sailed willingly into this ocean with nothing but a paddle?" he muttered.
Hawke shifted in her sleep.
"Luffy," she mumbled, letting go of the oar.
The two men stared down at her.
"Well," sighed Crocodile, "You get her inside. I'll take over here."
Daz raised an eyebrow at him, but he picked up Hawke and entered the ship.
"It's been a week already," Crocodile called after him, "My wounds are well on the way to being healed."
He sat down, with great effort, and picked up the oar. He guessed that if he went to far off course the girl would wake up and scream at him, so he just kept the boat going the way it had been pointing.
"I wonder how she can sense his whereabouts like that," he muttered, "If its Haki, then it's very highly developed."
He recalled that he had seen her use Busoshoku Haki during their escape from Impel Down, while she fought the assistant warden.
Could she be capable of using both types? he wondered, That would be very interesting.
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The day passed quickly. Crocodile paddled as long as he could manage, finding the exercise a relief from his recent inactivity. Daz found a second oar under a bench at the bow of the boat and joined him at the stern.
Both men were silent for the most part, which is just how Crocodile liked it.
The sun soon began to sink below the horizon and Hawke still hadn't woken up. Crocodile let out a groan as he lifted his paddle back onto the deck.
"We'll drop anchor here for the night," he scowled, reaching for his cane.
Daz let the anchor loose. The splash broke the silence loudly, drawing Crocodiles gaze out to the horizon.
"It's strange," he muttered, "I would have expected to be eaten by now…"
Daz followed his gaze and grunted.
"Maybe it's a sign," he said.
Crocodile smirked and let out a dark chuckle.
"You believe in such stupid things," he said.
He struggled to a standing position and leaned heavily on the railing.
"Where are you taking us, Angel?" he muttered, his eyes finding the horizon again.
Daz put the two oars in the kitchen and then stuck his head back out the door.
"There's leftovers," he grunted.
Crocodile shot him a hard stare.
"If she doesn't wake up I'll have to suffer through your cooking, won't I?" he sneered.
"Unfortunately, yes," was the reply.
Then Daz went back into the kitchen to begin preparing the meal. Crocodile glanced at the door to the kitchen, then crossed the deck and cracked opened the door to the bedroom.
Daz had put Hawke in his own bed. Crocodile could see her hair sprawled over the pillow and watched her side rise and fall with her breath. She hadn't woken up screaming, so he supposed she had been over-exhausted and would be asleep for a while yet.
He closed the door quietly and headed to the kitchen, feeling strangely reassured. He couldn't have his key to power dying of exhaustion on him.
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The night passed very slowly for Crocodile. He found himself feeling uncomfortable with the fact that Hawke was sleeping in the bed next to his. She hadn't woken up yet, and Daz had decided to let her keep the bed and was snoring on the floor by the door.
Like the loyal dog that he is, the sand man thought with a smirk.
Crocodile shifted his body, frowning as pain shot through his abdomen, and turned his head so he could look over at the girl laying surprisingly close to him. She was sleeping on her side, facing his direction and had a peaceful look on her face.
He thought back to the war at Marineford.
You made me get too involved, he scowled.
He had let the world know that his reasons for stopping the first execution attempt on Fire Fist was that his hatred for the marines was greater than his hatred for Whitebeard.
That hadn't been the whole truth, however. The only reason he had stayed at Marineford after the Yonko had shown his incredible weakness by being stabbed by his own crew member, was Hawke's presence. Afterall, if he wanted what was left of his goal to succeed, he needed her to survive this battle.
He had kept an eye on her, staying in the background until she had been caught by Sengoku. And even then, the only reason he had cut down the executioners was to make it look like he wasn't saving only Hawke from being captured by the Navy. He didn't want that kind of suspicious attention focused on him. After she had fallen free and he and Doflamingo had settled their little dispute, he had continued to shadow her through the battlefield. But he'd had to intervene again when the stupid brat almost got cut down by Mihawk.
He had actually almost let Akainu finish off Strawhat, but again, Hawke had forced him into action. He had watched her fighting through the crowd, trying to reach the area where Fire Fist and Strawhat were. He remembered hearing her screams above the noise of the war as clear as if he had been standing beside her, and for some reason this unsettled him. She had almost reached the two boys when a marine soldier flung his gun back in preparation for an attack. The butt of his weapon had hit Hawke hard in the side of her head, the momentum actually spinning her around to face him, and allowing him to see the pain and shock in her eyes before she collapsed.
He knew that the battle had just passed its turning point, and that if the Dark Angel was left laying there, she would get killed or captured. So he'd taken that as his sign to move ahead with his plan. But Hawke hadn't quite been unconscious yet and when he'd picked her up, she had mumbled something about helping Luffy and Ace. And, since Crocodile didn't feel like giving the marines another victory, he'd obliged her.
Crocodile glared across the room.
Why did you have to be involved with those two, of all the stupid rookies? he thought, rolling over to face to wall.
It took a few more hours, but eventually Crocodile fell into a restful sleep.
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The next day began in a similar way as the last. Crocodile was paddling in the stern and Daz was fishing off the bow, trying to catch something for their breakfast
Crocodile was taking a break from paddling because his arms were getting sore, when the bedroom door opened and Hawke came out on deck.
"Good morning, Angel," he grunted at her.
She glanced over at him with groggy eyes. He could tell she was still half asleep.
"'morning, Crocoda…" she mumbled before stumbling into the kitchen.
Crocodile froze, almost dropping the paddle as he did so.
"What did you just call me?" he growled, staring at the kitchen door.
He hadn't been called that for twenty odd years. And he was more than a little unsettled at hearing it again.
Will you ever give me peace?! He glowered at the water, stupid woman!
Just then, Daz came around from the bow holding a seaking. Though it was very small by seaking standards, it was still large enough that he had to hoist it over his shoulder in order to carry it.
"Nice catch," Crocodile called over, "That's the first one we've seen."
Daz shot him a smirk then entered the kitchen.
A few moments later, he could hear Hawke's voice and the clanging of pots and pans.
So she's speaking again, he thought as he resumed his paddling.
Just then, Hawke came bursting out of the kitchen. She was fully awake now.
"Crocodile!" she seethed, "What are you doing?! Your wounds haven't healed enough for you to be doing that much work."
Crocodile's frown returned and he continued to paddle.
"What I do with my body is none of your concern now that I can move around," he snapped, scowling, "I've been lying in bed for days, I'm fit to get up now."
Hawke stormed up to him.
"But they could still re-open or you could tear something," she pulled on his arm, "Please go back inside."
"I see your vow of silence has broken," Crocodile smirked as he shook off her hand.
Hawke stood back and scowled at him.
Crocodile sighed.
"We had a deal," he stated, "You have been fulfilling your end, now I must fulfill mine. I am not a man who goes back on his word."
Hawke shot him a dark stare.
"Oh really?" she retorted, "You never gave me that impression."
She whirled around and stomped off towards the sleeping quarters.
Crocodile shrugged his shoulders. He didn't blame her for being wary of trusting him, he wasn't an easy man to trust. And he himself didn't trust anyone… not anymore.
Just then Hawke reappeared and took a few steps towards him. He stopped paddling and looked over at her.
"Here," she muttered and tossed him two objects, "I know you want one."
Crocodile reached out and grabbed them out of the air. As he did so, Hawke spun around and went back into the kitchen.
Looking at the objects she'd thrown, Crocodile raised his eyebrows. She had given him his lighter and a cigar.
It was true that he had not smoked since Marineford. He had been having cravings, but the pain from his wounds had been distracting him. That effect had been wearing off as his wounds began healing over, but for some reason he hadn't picked up a cigar since that night when Hawke had taken one from him.
I mean, it isn't like she forbade me, he thought, lighting the cigar and enjoying the taste of the smoke, and I wouldn't listen to a little shrimp like her, even if she's Cielle's...
He clenched his teeth down on his cigar. Why did he feel like he was lying to himself?! There was no way he'd take orders from anyone!
He scowled at the ocean.
Letting someone so young and stupid have any influence over me is ridiculous! He seethed internally, vowing to never let it happen again while also refusing to believe that it had happened.
His gaze returned to the horizon and he stiffened. There was a dark speck on the sea ahead of them.
It might just be a mirage, he thought, refraining from raising the alarm.
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Crocodile continued to paddle, his cigar seemed to have given him a new source of energy.
Hawke came out and handed him a bowl of seaking chowder.
"Eat up," she muttered, "I made some steaks for later."
Crocodile watched as she shifted her weight from foot to foot, waiting for him to finish his meal.
"You're getting restless," he commented.
"Mmm?" Hawke grunted absentmindedly, "Yeah."
Crocodile gave her a smirk.
This seemed to catch her attention.
"What?" she snapped, looking down at him.
Crocodile noticed a shadow flickering behind her eyes.
"Why don't you sit," he said, motioning to the deck at her feet, "You moving around pointlessly is annoying."
Hawke frowned, but she sat down lightly.
They sat in silence for a few moments. Hawke was still restless, rubbing her hands down her legs and arms, playing with her hair.
Crocodile finished his lunch in silence and then picked up the oar and began paddling again.
"Are you sure you don't want to rest?" Hawke asked him, "You shouldn't over exert yourself."
"We'll move faster if I do the paddling," Crocodile muttered, rolling his eyes, "And I want to get out of the Calm belt as soon as possible."
Hawke blinked at him, then she lowered her eyes to the deck.
"Thank you," she said quietly, tracing the wood grain with her fingers.
Crocodile shot her a look out of the corner of his eye. He saw the slight tremor run through her body and saw her fists clench for a few moments before relaxing again. He grunted in response.
She lifted her head, her eyes seemed dull.
"But surely Daz could do it too," she said, "He's just as strong as you. And if you get hurt again, my end of the deal will break."
Crocodile smirked.
"I'm touched by your concern," he sneered, "But if you think that Mister 1 is on the same level as me, you are sorely mistaken."
"I wasn't concerned," snapped Hawke, standing up and taking his dishes, "I just don't want to break our deal either."
She stalked off to the kitchen and slammed the door.
As the morning turned into the afternoon, the speck on the horizon became clearer and larger.
Well, I can't deny that any longer, he sighed.
"Land ahead!" he called loudly.
He heard some clanging and then Hawke burst out of the kitchen.
"Where, where?" she stuttered, half excited, half worried.
"Straight ahead," said Crocodile calmly, surprised that he didn't find her youthful demeanour intolerable.
Hawke turned and gasped as she saw the approaching land mass. She ran up to the rail.
"That's where he is!" she exclaimed, "He's there, I know it!"
Hawke ran around to the bow. As she disappeared from view, Daz came out of the kitchen and looked ahead to the island.
He turned and walked over to Crocodile.
"I checked the charts last night," he said in his usual serious tone, "The only island anywhere near this area is Amazon Lily, territory of the Kuja pirates."
Crocodile clenched his jaw and stared ahead at the distant island.
"The Island of Women? What is Strawhat doing there?" he muttered.
Hawke came speeding back around the deck again.
"Please let me fly," she begged, running up to Crocodile, "We're almost there! He's right there!"
Crocodile looked down at her desperate eyes, seeing the swirling waves of sadness, anger, frustration and regret that were simmering just under the surface. He felt an urge to agree to her demand, but he quickly stifled that strange feeling.
He shook his head.
"I can't have you running off until I'm fully healed," he grunted, frowning, and nodded to Daz, who picked up the oar and began paddling.
"But he's so close," she begged, clinging to his arm.
Crocodile roughly shook her off.
"It'll take us a few more hours to reach that island," he snapped, "You can wait."
Hawke let out an exasperated groan.
"If you let me use my wings, I can push this boat faster," she continued desperately.
"No," snapped Crocodile, "That's not part of our deal."
Hawke pulled on her hair in a fit of desperation.
Then she ran around to the front of the ship again.
"She might decide to swim," Daz said calmly as he continued to row.
Crocodile grunted.
"She's not that stupid," he said.
But he followed after her anyways.
Rounding the bow of the ship, he caught sight of Hawke sitting on the rail.
She isn't going to jump after all, is she? He thought with a raised eyebrow.
But she didn't make a move.
As he approached her, he saw she was looking at something in her hands.
"Don't jump," he grunted as he leaned against the rail next to her.
Hawke started and shot him a glare before returning her gaze to the object in her hands.
"I'm not stupid," she muttered.
Crocodile's eyes widened as he recognized Cielle's picture.
"What are you doing with that?" he asked her.
"You gave it to me remember?" she said sarcastically, but then her shoulders relaxed, "It makes me feel better… for some reason," she mumbled.
Crocodile felt a small spike of interest. Even though she didn't know who she was looking at, she could sense that there was some connection between her and the woman in the photograph.
She must have some Kenbunshoku Haki abilities as well, he thought, there's no other way she could sense things like that.
"What's the Howling Harpy?" Hawke asked suddenly.
Crocodile raised his eyebrows.
"It's a small tavern on an island on the Grand Line," he said slowly.
Hawke raised her face to look at him, her eyes less turbulent and a little curious.
"I can picture you two together," she said quietly before looking back at the photograph.
Crocodile glanced quickly at her, then looked ahead to the approaching island, his face betraying no emotion, despite the sudden uncomfortable feeling he'd gotten in the pit of his stomach.
"I'm flattered," he grunted in a disinterested tone.
Hawke let out a soft sigh, then she relapsed into a contemplative silence.
They sat quietly for a while.
"How did she die?" Hawke asked.
Crocodile was surprised at the sudden questions and saw she was staring at him resolutely, waiting for an answer. He pressed his lips together. Under any other circumstances, he would kill anyone who got anywhere close to this subject. But he didn't have that option with this girl, and if he wanted to have influence over her, he needed to give her something that would make her want to stick around on her own will. He ran the risk of her knowing about his past and holding it over his head at some point in the future, but if it meant that she decided to stay, then it was a sacrifice he was willing to make.
Besides, he told himself, she would probably be able to tell if I lied to her.
He shrugged.
"She was sailing on a merchant vessel in the East Blue when the ship was attacked by pirates," Crocodile muttered, "That particular crew had a reputation for taking no prisoners."
He heard Hawke let out a small gasp and saw her clench the photo a little tighter.
"The East Blue?" she asked, "But I thought you met on the Grand Line?"
"We did," said Crocodile, "She decided to sail to a calmer place to live with her husband and child."
"Her husband!? A child?!" Hawke turned a little to face him, her eyes bright with curiosity, "Did you get married?!"
Crocodile lowered his gaze to the waves at the base of the ship.
Waves? He noted, though didn't betray this surprise in his voice.
"No," he replied, his eyes searching the water and finding something very interesting happening below their boat.
So that's why we're still alive, he realized, but what is causing it?
Hawke was silent for a few moments.
"Oh," she finally said, "Oh, I see."
Crocodile grunted and stopped leaning on the rail.
He'd had enough of being sentimental and he knew she wasn't going to leave.
"Don't fall off," he grunted and stalked back towards the stern.
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Hawke watched as Crocodile left.
But you still kept her picture, she thought sadly.
She gazed down at the photo of Cielle.
"He still loves you," she told the picture, "In his own way."
She let her gaze return to the island ahead.
Crocodile had been right. With him and Daz paddling, they had made it half-way to the island since Crocodile had first raised the alarm. She could almost make out the shoreline now.
"I'm so close Luffy," she muttered.
She had been feeling a rising sense of urgency as soon as the island had come into view. The bubbling sea of emotions in her chest was almost beyond her control, she wouldn't be able to keep it in check for much longer. She needed to see Luffy now!
"Please be okay," she whispered, clenching the picture.
Her eyes fell to the picture in her hands, then fell down to the waves at the base of the boat.
The waves…? Wait, what?!
Hawke almost fell off the rail as she squirmed down and leaned out, trying to get a better look. There were waves on an ocean that had no wind! The ripples of water that fluttered around the ship were more than what should be created by a boat moving at a relatively slow pace through calm waters. Hawke stared down hard and thought she saw a gap between the water and the wood of the hull.
"What?" she muttered.
Getting down on her belly, she reached her hand down as far as she could.
She let out a little gasp as she felt a cold breeze chill her fingertips.
"Air?!" she exclaimed, "There's air between the boat and the water!"
So we're floating?! She couldn't believe what she was seeing and feeling, is this why no sea kings have eaten us?
Hawke quickly withdrew her hand and got up, resting her chin on her fist.
"What is going on?" she muttered.
Then her eyes traveled upwards and saw the island growing ever closer.
It doesn't matter now, she thought, we're almost there. Almost to Luffy!
She felt the huge storm of emotions that she had been keeping in her chest begin churning again, but she forced it down, though just barely. She needed to see Luffy and make sure he was okay!
