Hello in 2018, dear readers! I hope this year is going to be amazing for you all – I am so far doing well myself, which is a great development after really stressful previous year.
Rest assured that the long wait between chapters now is used well to ensure I am putting in all the "puzzle pieces" needed to move the plot towards the way I plan. It's in this chapter as well, even if it might not seem so ;)
As always, chapter was betaed by wonderful hkvoyage.
Enjoy!
Blaine blinked slowly. For a moment he was sure he misheard Kurt.
"P… Punish you? What do you mean?"
Cooper whined when Kurt paused petting him. The Sub looked at his Dom with determination. The moment he said those words to Blaine his mind filled with a sudden clarity, confirming his interpretation of what his instincts were trying to tell him.
"I mean exactly what I said," Kurt said calmly. "I… I knew about Sebastian aggressively coming on Nick before today. Me trying to 'come out' as a Sub wasn't only to take him off your back, but also to distract Sebastian from Nick and other Subs that were uncomfortable."
Blaine frowned. "This is why you've been so secretive since our trip to the bar?"
Kurt nodded. "That was when Nick told me he was being harassed by Smythe. Seeing how miserable he was has spurred me into thinking of a plan. A little diversion from me seemed like a smart plan at the time, but I didn't count on Sebastian being so dumb as to completely ignore my clues. I hoped to get his attention subtly, but then he opened his mouth and, well, it didn't work out that way."
"I gathered that he must've said something awful to you."
"Yeah… He implied that Subs fake a lack of consent to appear hard to get. I…" Kurt's voice wavered as he recalled that scene. "I actually was going to get you at that point. I really should've got you, but I became so mad because it reminded me of that douchebag from that Stravaganza restaurant-"
"Did Smythe touch you?!" Blaine blurted out, suddenly enraged. Maybe his talk with Sebastian the next day should involve violence after all.
"No!" Kurt quickly said. "He reminded me not of what he did, just by what he said. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I don't think Sebastian would actually go as far as that 'whatshisname' jerk did. However, at the time I wasn't really thinking rationally. I suddenly wanted to… I don't know. Prove something? Erase that stupid smirk off his face?"
"Well, you certainly accomplished the latter, I give you that."
Kurt smiled weakly.
"The point is that I let my pride and emotions cloud my professional judgement and rational thinking. I certainly didn't make Subs look good today."
Blaine sighed. "I'm not going to lie and say your behaviour didn't cause problems, but you are too hard on yourself. Your goal was to protect Nick, and your heart was in the right place."
"I'm afraid that this time you aren't strict enough with me. I feel that by hiding my true reasons to let Smythe know my status, I betrayed your trust… looking back, I see that I behaved rather immature. I was trying to prove something – that I could stand up to a Dom by myself, perhaps – but I didn't do it in the right way."
"Wait…" Blaine drummed his fingers on the table, frowning suspiciously. "I hope you don't want to be punished because of what Sebastian said."
Kurt scrunched his nose in disgust. "What he said is pretty much the only reason I've been hesitant to admit to myself that this might be what I need. If it was only arguing with Smythe, I feel like I'd be angry rather than guilty, but because I haven't been honest with you from the beginning… Apparently, hiding things from you is uncomfortable for me now. I was aware of what I should've done – to bring up everything to you – but I allowed my emotions and pride to cloud my judgement. I mean, that decision is not only mine to be made, of course, but don't you think it's better to give me a punishment and be done with it instead of me having all those doubts?"
Blaine moved closer to his Sub. He cradled Kurt's face in his hands for a moment, looking for fear or insecurity in the Sub's eyes. "As you are becoming more in tune with your nature, it's possible that you are becoming more receptive to what a Sub traditionally would need in such a situation, but… Are you sure? You've already had a trying day. I don't want to make it more difficult for you. "
"This is me, remember?" Kurt smiled, but it looked strained. "I wouldn't tell you to do that without a good reason for it. I hid the Sebastian issue from you, and my instincts are now very offended that I betrayed your trust. The context doesn't seem to matter."
Blaine paused to think. The Dom knew that the Sub was usually quite apprehensive about following his submissive instincts, and the fact that Kurt was the one suggesting punishing himself meant his guilt was making the Sub extremely uncomfortable.
The Dom found himself torn between wanting to cuddle and protect Kurt longer – even if it was from the Sub's own guilt – and wanting to make Kurt's uneasiness to just vanish. The right punishment would typically indeed be the fastest way for a Sub to feel better in situations such as this.
"If we were to agree to do it…" Blaine started cautiously. "There are two general options we could choose between. One – for certain amount of time you would agree to a certain sacrifice, for example not getting any dessert for next two weeks."
"Two weeks without cheesecake?" Kurt's eyes grew wider.
"For example, two weeks without cheesecake," Blaine confirmed. He was fighting to keep a grin off his face.
"Preposterous. What is the other option?"
"The other option is a bit more short-term, but it also means that it has to be more… intense."
Kurt was quick in noticing that Blaine was beating around the bush. "I need you to be more specific. Just give me an example."
The Dom's lips thinned for a moment, and then he spoke. "For example impact punishment. More intense, possible pain, but at the same time it can be a quick, one-time event."
Kurt rolled his eyes. "Can you stop with the language gymnastics? You mean a spanking, right? I am not going to spontaneously combust just from calling it by its name."
"Well, technically speaking impact play is the correct name for it. An umbrella phrase for spanking, but also for whipping, flogging, caning-"
"Ok, ok!" Kurt put up his hands in a surrendering gesture as Blaine raised his eyebrows, smug he could prove his point. "I got it. The phrase 'impact punishment' sounds lovely enough. So, in a nutshell, I have a choice between a swift or a long-term punishment."
"Or, at any point now you can say your safe word, and we could move this discussion for another time," Blaine added. "I am not saying this just to get out of the conversation. I know today was… trying for both of us. It's natural that you might prefer to give it a longer thought."
Kurt was silent for a long moment. What Blaine was proposing was somewhat tempting, but delaying things was not something Kurt liked to do.
"I think that if we don't sort this out now, I would just be thinking about it all night anyway."
The Dom nodded. "And what is your decision then?"
"I…" Kurt swallowed. He could take his time with the decision, but he realised that he knew what choice would be able to make the heavy feeling inside him go away the fastest.
"Do you promise not to make any comments about my choice?"
Blaine leaned toward Kurt's space.
"Of course," The Dom said with confidence.
"Then… I would prefer the punishment to be now. I mean the immediate one."
Blaine only watched Kurt. The Dom's face was patiently not showing any reaction so far.
"The i-impact one," Kurt specified and glanced at the Dom. "Is that alright?"
"Of course. If you are sure." Blaine looked for a moment like he was about to add something, but stopped himself, remembering his earlier promise. "It will have to be by hand, of course. It is the best for starting up, and we don't really have anything else suitable here anyway."
"Should I… what do I…" Kurt fidgeted.
"Why don't you go and get some skin balm first. You might want to change into your briefs and any top of your choice. Casual and comfortable."
Kurt swallowed audibly and moved with determination. "Right. Change clothes. Skin cream." He rushed toward the bedroom door.
"Oh, and Kurt!" Blaine stopped his Sub half-way there. "Remember that it is not a 'sentence'. It's alright to stop this from happening anytime you want. I will be in the living room when you're ready."
Kurt nodded and went toward the bedroom, stopping by the bathroom to pick up his thickest skin moisturiser.
The Sub would not be himself if he did not try to take at least partial control over the situation. He chose a dark red thong with a waistband made of double straps tied at the back in a little knot – he knew this particular pair always drove Blaine crazy. He started thinking what top to choose when his eyes landed on Blaine's part of the wardrobe. The Sub smiled mischievously.
Blaine dropped onto the couch with a heavy sigh. He closed his eyes and rested his head on the sofa's back cushions. The Dom pinched his nose to help himself to focus on what had just happened – how did they suddenly go from discussing the day's events to introducing Kurt to impact punishment? He could see his Sub's reasoning in wanting to get rid of his guilt quickly, but he also remembered that Kurt was always outspoken against pain and humiliation. Not that Blaine planned on doing anything stronger than spanking, but still…
"Blaine?" Kurt's voice brought Blaine back to the current situation.
The Dom opened his eyes and barely managed to stop himself from gaping. Kurt wore one of Blaine's button-up white shirts. It was one of his informal ones – loose white cotton – and it hung slightly from the Sub's lithe silhouette. The lower hem of the shirt skimmed gently over Kurt's thighs.
"You didn't specify whose top I should be wearing," the Sub said, smiling.
Blaine managed to collect himself murmuring something under his nose that sounded like 'you minx' and beckoned Kurt to come closer. The Sub stepped forward, stopping just by Blaine's knees.
"Where would you like me to…" he waved vaguely around the sofa.
"Next to me, for now, is ok. Do you have the cream?"
Kurt nodded, gave Blaine the jar and sat down. The Dom licked his suddenly dry lips as the shirt rode up showing even more of Kurt's lean thighs.
"Right," Blaine spoke up to ground himself. "You are going to be in a pretty basic and comfortable position. You will lay on your stomach across my lap and elbows crossed in front of your face. You can grab one of the pillows in case you'd want to rest your face on something. I am going to use my hand. Are you with me so far, Kitten?"
"Me on your lap, facing down. Got it," Kurt said and then immediately frowned. "Won't using your hand hurt you as well?"
"A bit, yes," the Dom admitted. "This is why using bare hands is also recommended for beginner Doms – it's easier to assess and control one's strength. On this occasion, I don't plan to use a lot of strength, so it's not going to matter. We both have work tomorrow – I will need to be able to use my hands, and you'll have to be able to sit in front of the computer the whole day," Blaine smiled.
Kurt relaxed slightly. If his Dom really took all this into account, then he at least did not have to worry about embarrassing limping the next day.
Blaine continued.
"Now, just because it's a punishment doesn't mean you don't get a say in how it's going. We'll use the traffic colour code system in addition to your safeword. If at any time I ask if you're alright and you are fine with continuing you will say…?" Blaine raised his eyebrows indicating for Kurt to finish.
"Oh, um, green, right?"
The Dom nodded. "And if you need a short break, slowing down or need me to reduce the strength, you will say?"
"Yellow."
"Very good. You can say that colour without me asking, of course. Then follow with the request. And then, if you need us to stop, you say?
"Red… or my safeword," Kurt answered.
"Which is…"
"Kingfisher."
"Excellent," Blaine smiled.
Due to all the talking, Kurt felt himself gradually calming down. Part of him even started to be a little curious about what was going to happen.
"Now, to the number… I am going to suggest twenty. It might seem like a lot, but since we aren't putting much power into strength, we will in number. Additionally, you will count them as I go. Just saying the number will do. This is another good way for me to make sure you are okay and fully aware during the punishment."
Kurt frowned. "What do you mean aware? How could I be not?"
"Spanking can sometimes lead to going into subspace, and with your current situation regarding subspace…" Blaine stroked Kurt's forearm. "I just want to be sure you're safe and comfortable. So I can be comfortable."
"Oh… of course." The Sub stirred. "Are we going to start soon?"
Blaine nodded. "Yes, that's it. Are you ready?"
"As ready as I can be. Should I take the position?"
"Yeah. Take one of the pillows from the sofa to hold onto it."
Kurt moved down onto his stomach, shimmying his hips just so to rest his thighs on Blaine's. The Sub smirked as he heard Blaine sharp intake of air – the Dom must've just noticed that Kurt was wearing a red thong underneath the shirt.
"I feel like I should be adding another five spankings for that," Blaine said, but there was laughter in his voice.
"Too late. We already made the 'deal'," Kurt said, wriggling some more before finding the most comfortable position for himself.
Blaine took a deep breath. The Sub was going to be the death of him.
"Alright. From now on I don't want to hear anything from you besides counting, or your words."
Kurt stilled and held his breath in anticipation.
At first, it was only a sharp sound that informed Kurt it began. However, soon after that, he felt a warmth spreading on one of his ass cheeks. It was not exactly painful, but the new sensation caused Kurt to forget for a moment that he was expected to respond.
"Um, one," he said as soon as he remembered.
He most definitely felt the second slap as Blaine hit the exact same spot.
"Two."
Another.
"Three"
With each hit, what happened today is supposed to fade away, Kurt thought. Not entirely forgotten – Kurt is pretty sure that despite Blaine's cautiousness he'll still feel the punishment on his behind tomorrow – but forgiven.
"I can feel you overthinking this, Kitten. Just concentrate on counting," Blaine said with the next, slightly stronger hit.
"Four," Kurt answered, feeling the building warmth grounding him.
A few more hits continued with the same strength and Kurt couldn't help but grunt out one of the numbers with a wince.
"Colour?"
The Sub blinked. "Green… No, wait, yellow." Kurt felt the Dom shifting tensely underneath him, probably starting to worry.
"Too strong?"
Kurt shook his head. "No, but… could you avoid my right ass cheek from now on? It's gotten a bit too much attention. Um, if that's alright."
Blaine's sigh was audibly filled with relief. "No problem. You want a breather or can we continue?"
"Go ahead, I'm fine."
The next hit fell on the upper part of the left thigh. Kurt squeaked as the heat wave from the hit travelled along his groin.
"E…Eleven."
Blaine continued alternating between Kurt's butt and thighs, trying to keep the target more balanced. Kurt would have fallen into a sluggish state as his lower body was enveloped in the sting and warmth routine if it was not for his counting keeping him in there. Even when just lying across Blaine's lap and not having to do much besides being hit, Kurt felt sweat trailing down his back. More droplets appeared on his forehead.
A sudden thought entered Kurt's mind.
If my ass hurts that way, Blaine's hand must feel awful. Even so, he chose this method, because he knew a different one might be too painful for me. Kurt blinked rapidly as his eyes stung.
"Eighteen."
Something must've shown in the Sub's voice because Blaine hesitated for a moment.
"Colour?"
Kurt sniffed. "Green. It's fine."
"Last two," Blaine said quietly and, because apparently, he was a softie, the last two hits were considerably gentler.
The Dom patted Kurt on his shoulder. "It's finished. You've done very well, Kitten," he said with a finality. When Kurt started to move, however, the Dom pushed him back down.
"Don't move yet, I need to cool you down. God… Jeff and Nick were serious about your hypersensitive skin. Your butt looks like two tomatoes."
"Complimenting my underwear choice, no doubt," Kurt grunted. His voice was still a bit shaky, but considerably lighter in tone.
"About that… If you intended to torture me with that thong and shirt… Congratulations. Mission accomplished."
"We could do something about that…" Kurt wiggled his hips.
"No." Blaine's voice turned serious. "It's a bad idea to jump to sex straight after punishment. Your emotions would be all over the place. Plus, there are still things to be done."
The Dom stretched over Kurt to grab the jar of cream. He scooped a generous gallop of the refreshing-smelling cream from it. Kurt squeaked as he felt the coldness on his warm butt. Blaine gently massaged in a thick layer of the moisturiser into the Sub's skin.
"Just don't use up the whole jar. I'll need to still have some of it for my face routine."
"There's still some left. I just need to ensure that your skin is not damaged."
Kurt allowed himself to close eyes and enjoy the repetitive circles traced by Blaine on his behind. The Sub stretched his back just like a content feline would.
"This is nice. I feel like I should be doing this myself, though, since this was supposed to be a punishment, yet you're clearly spoiling me now."
Blaine chuckled, and Kurt could feel the tremble of his laughter in his hips where he was laying on the Dom's lap.
"You might be a submissive, Kurt, but it is the Dom that serves. I served you the punishment, so it's obvious I should serve you the aftercare too. Speaking of which, I think your ass is moisturised enough. Let me get up so I could bring you something to drink."
Kurt slid from Blaine's lap and moved to get up from the sofa.
"I can do that-" His legs buckled under him and only Blaine's arms stopped Kurt from falling down. The Sub noticed that he was shaking.
"Kitten, just stay here." Blaine put Kurt back onto the sofa. "Don't move. I mean it. Your body and mind are still working through your punishment. I'll be back in a second."
Kurt numbly nodded and curled in his seat. He was so busy with quipping at Blaine earlier that only now he was starting to realise how tired he felt. Kurt was sure that he could sleep now for days and would still need more rest. The warmth on his behind did not allow him to forget about what had just happened. Part of him was bitter at how his hated high school teacher would be gloating now – how he would certainly comment on Kurt needing a harsh touch for discipline. But another part of him was sure that no punishment would 'beat' out of him his rebelliousness. He did not feel like his personality or character changed just because Blaine spanked him.
Kurt smirked, seeing the parallel to the first time he and Blaine had sex. Back then the Sub also expected to feel and look different, as if the marks left by Blaine on his mind would be visible to the whole world, but in reality they did not change the very foundations of his character.
"You're smiling. I hope that's a good sign," Blaine spoke as he came back to the room, holding a blanket and a glass of orange juice.
"Just thinking how I feel… surprisingly normal. Just very tired."
The Dom hummed as he handed Kurt the juice and wrapped the blanket around his shoulders.
"Drink up. You didn't quite reach subspace, but you still might crash." Blaine sat at the Sub's side, observing Kurt carefully. "It's good that you feel normal. The punishment should get rid of your feelings of guilt."
"So… I'm, like, completely forgiven?" Kurt asked.
Blaine smiled and kissed Kurt's forehead. "I forgave you for your stunt right away. But yes, clean slate and all that. I believe you know better now to keep me in the loop about your feelings and plans."
Kurt exhaled with a sudden relief. He burrowed his head into Blaine's shoulder tightened the blanket around himself.
"So you said no sex right after the punishment, but when we do… we could try adding a one or two light strikes. To see what happens."
Blaine raised his eyebrows.
"Look at you… Suddenly so adventurous. If you are sure, why not? You said you aren't a fan of pain play, but something light, just to warm you up…"
"Yeah, that's what I meant," Kurt agreed. He hummed for a moment, thinking out loud. "Is it ironic that I wouldn't have thought about spanking as something erotic if it wasn't for Sebastian baiting me?"
"Yeah, we should get him a 'Thank you' card. To the shallowest of playboys for helping a steady couple." Blaine joked but became alarmed by Kurt's sudden stillness. He carefully looked at the Sub.
Kurt smiled beatifically, which, of course, meant that he was up to no good.
"Uhuh. I have a feeling I won't like what you're thinking, Kitten. Just because you have a clean slate doesn't mean you can just go ahead and repeat the same mistake." The Dom quickly said.
Kurt sighed dramatically.
"If you say so. I can't stop Sebastian arguing with me, but I promise I won't start anything."
Why did it not make Blaine any less worried?
