Chapter Fifty Two
Intially, Jamie planned to tell Eddie upfront what Erin had done, but seeing her curled like she was, pain on her face, he rethought it quickly. Jamie put on his best smile and moved over to the bed. "Hey, you okay? You don't look like you feel well. You hungry for some Japanese and saki?"
"I can't drink saki, I took a pill," Eddie replied. "My leg is throbbing. Set up the dinner if you're hungry."
"I'm starving, been smelling this all the way from Queens, my stomach is growling," Jamie smiled. "Sit up, I'll get the plates."
Eddie took a breath, she had hoped he would speak to her immediately about the woman in the picture, disclose the name and the purpose and then move on, but he didn't. Eddie moved to sit on the bed and continued to hope.
"Here you go, one chicken teriyaki bento box for the lady," he smiled and. "Sparkling water. You can saki tomorrow."
Jamie gave Eddie a soft peck on the lips, she didn't return it. Jamie did his shot then started to eat, he talked about his day, he talked about the kids, he asked after her leg, but he didn't once mention the woman he had drinks with at Sullivan's.
Jamie felt the conversation was strained and he was concerned about Eddie's silence. She'd been having spells on and off of being quiet and depressed but this was a little different. Before he could speak up about it, Eddie reached for her phone and slid it over to him, open to the picture of him with the pretty brunette. The action didn't require words.
Jamie looked at the phone and sighed, then took the device and turned it back to Eddie, "What do you think happened here?" Jamie asked calmly.
Eddie sighed, "You didn't have drinks with Erin. It's fine, it's okay," Eddie replied. "You're single, we aren't in a relationship…"
"Hold it right there," Jamie said firmly. "We are in a relationship, Eddie. We're going to make a life together, I consider you the only one for me and I told that to Cindy tonight. What you see here is the two of us laughing at what a nosy, pushy person Erin can be. She tricked me into meeting her then sprung this on me."
Eddie sighed, she didn't want to argue about this. Erin probably did trick him, that was no longer the real issue. The issue was the time, they had been together nearly an hour, if it was that innocent, why hide it? Why not be upfront, they could have laughed and moved on but now…
"Okay," Eddie replied. "It's fine." Eddie took her phone and put it on the floor. "It's just fine. Let's just finish our dinner."
Jamie finished his meal and cleared for him and Eddie. When he got back to the bedroom, Eddie had laid back down and shut off her light. Jamie stretched out on the bed and wrapped his arms around her from behind, Jamie began to softly nuzzle her. "We can still have a nice night. I'm sorry Erin messed it up for us, but we still have five more nights."
Eddie sighed, she didn't participate in Jamie's attentions, just laid still as he deposited kisses on her neck. Eventually, their magnetism took over and Eddie turned over on her back, her body betraying her heart.
Their love making was very slow. Jamie positioned himself over Eddie's body. He knew she was sore, he kept his touch gentle and his kisses focused on making Eddie feel safe and loved. Jamie nuzzled Eddie's ear and ran the kisses down her jaw to her soft breasts. Eddie raised her hands to Jamie's shoulders, she cupped them. She could push out and get him off of her, she was hurt enough to do that, or she could pull in and hold him to her, claim him and seal him into her. Eddie chose to do nothing, that's what she felt like at the moment anyway, nothing.
Jamie focused on her, this wasn't for him, this was for her. Eddie had been through a lot, this connection was what she really needed. She needed their union, to be his focus, to be his everything.
Jamie didn't feel much coming back from Eddie tonight, she was tired, she was sad and it was up to him. Jamie held Eddie to him as he filled her, he rocked and cradled her, no sounds emitted from either except occasional soft sighs.
When it was over, Jamie felt Eddie begin to shake, her small body quivering as soundless tears feel. Jamie's heart sank, "Eddie, are you okay? Did I hurt you?"
"Did he hurt her?" Eddie thought. More than words, but out loud she only sighed and rolled over onto her stomach. She shook her head as the tears continued to fall down.
Jamie rubbed Eddie's back, "It's okay, you cry all you want," Jamie soothed. He didn't know the source of her tears, but it hurt him to see her in this pain. Perhaps all he could do was let her cry out the pain she was feeling in her heart. "I'm here, it's all right. I love you so much, you're my love, my life..."
Pretty words…but how much meaning. "It's okay, it's all right…" Platitudes but no apology. It was innocent, she believed that, so why omit it, why lie?
Eddie's sobs began to die down to sniffles as her body settled down. "That's it, go to sleep," Jamie whispered. "If you need me I'll be right by your side."
Eddie knew that was true, she wasn't scare of losing him, was she? "Never lose me,' she murmured out loud. "Can't ever lose me…"
Jamie's eyes arched, did she say what he thought? "Eddie?" Jamie asked but her breathing had evened out, the depression, medication, and motion lulling her to sleep.
When Jamie was sure Eddie was sleeping, he slid out of the bed and headed down stairs. Eddie's tears had kicked him square in the heart, he was far from being able to sleep that way. Jamie peered in on their little ones, April was sleeping with her little hands up and folded, still like a baby and Max was holding his bear on his side, snoring lightly. Jamie smiled, their little ones were resting at least that was right.
Jamie walked to the kitchen to get a glass of milk, that would help him to settle down. Jamie nearly leapt out of his skin when he saw Anita sitting at the table in the dark. "Miss Eddie asleep?" she asked.
"Uh, yeah…" Jamie replied tears dancing behind his eyes. "She actually cried herself to sleep, I'm not sure why, she's so down."
"Why?" Anita asked. "You aren't sure why she was crying?"
"No," Jamie replied. "I was late, there was a debacle with my sister trying to set to me up but it was nothing. We kept our plans, I…"
"Did you say you were sorry?" Anita asked pointedly.
"No," Jamie replied. "No I didn't say I was sorry, I'm not sorry, I didn't do anything wrong."
"You told Ms. Eddie right off, you came in and told her?" Anita pressed trying to get Jamie to see.
No, I didn't even think it mattered. "It was nothing and I got here to be with her, that's all I wanted to do was be here with her." Jamie couldn't believe he "was" admitting this to Tom's housekeeper.
"I see how much you love Ms. Eddie, I can see your tears for her," Anita smiled. "But you have to tell her that you are sorry you hurt her feelings. She is in a bad place, she needs that kind of care now, you must do this to make her feel better. That is why she is so hurt, you didn't tell her before she asked and you didn't say sorry after. Sorry might not fix it, but it was start. How would you feel if someone had seen her with another man? Innocently or not if she didn't tell you right away, you would be hurt."
Jamie nodded, "I didn't see it like that. I did intend to but I saw her so sad and in pain and I didn't think it was smart to be adding to that, guess I did anyway?" Jamie sank into a chair and drank his milk.
"Seems you did," Anita replied. "Now, let me make you bread to go with that, you sleep well talk to Ms. Eddie, say sorry!"
Jamie chuckled, just like his pop with the food. "Sure, thanks Anita for the advice."
"I love Ms. Eddie very much, as she's happy with you. It's like sometimes, life gets in the way."
While he ate his snack, his phone rang. Jamie glanced at the screen, it was Danny, he must have come off the late tour. "Hey Kid," Danny reached and picked up the phone. "How you doing? How's Eddie?"
"She's…recuperating, I think she's doing all right, but she's been a little sad tonight, and I'm not sure…"
"What's wrong, Kid?" Danny asked. "And don't' say nothing because I can hear it in your voice. You two have a fight?"
No, our wonderful sister set me up on a blind date, ducked out and Kara Walsh "saw" me laughing at Erin with this girl, Kara shoots a picture and sends it to Eddie,' Jamie sighed. "She cried, Danny. I never wanted her to cry."
"Let me guess, you didn't tell her about woman, you just let it lie and she busted you?" Danny asked. "You messed up, Kid. You are in the deepest crap."
Jamie admitted Danny was right.
Danny sighed. "So, to her you are guilty as sin. So, you go up to her, no gimmicks, no cutesy stuff and tell her you are sorry for waiting, you are sorry for hurting her feelings. Hold her hands, meet her eyes and whatever she says to you, take it. That will help a lot towards fixing it."
"She was so sad," Jamie sighed. "I've never seen her like that and it just got worse now. I wanted to protect her, and she…"
"Women like Eddie and Linda, you can't protect them, they get mad at you. You can't protect them from the stuff you do, just the stuff that happens," Danny replied. 'Let her sleep, stay close, eat your helping of crown and learn from being stupid!"
Jamie had to laugh, "Thanks, Danny. You get a good sleep okay?"
"I will, you too and don't be a bonehead tomorrow, date night with Linda…" Danny warned. "Have a good night Kid."
Jamie kissed the back of Eddie's neck and nuzzled her. He finally dozed off around dawn. He never let himself get into a deep sleep, when Eddie woke up, he was going to talk to her about this.
It was just before 8 when Eddie stirred. Jamie slid out of bed and moved to kneel by her side of the bed. "You okay?"Eddie asked curious about his position..
Jamie nodded, he could still see the hurt in her voice. Occasionally, she would get this way and it really bothered him that she did. She had been there and when he was Eddie was his beacon in the night.
"I owe you and apology, Eddie, "Jamie sighed. "Please listen to me…"
"I don't want to talk about this,' Eddie replied moving to turn over only Jamie had her hands.
"I know, so just listen and then you can tell me to go or shut up or whatever," Jamie replied.
"I am so sorry I didn't' tell you about what Erin did right off the bat, I intended to do that then I got home and you were so sad. I didn't want to add to your pain, and in trying to protect you, I hurt you worse."
"Jamie, you don't have to protect me from you," Eddie sighed. "You only hurt me when you do that. I'd rather you hurt me by being honest, then protect me by keeping me in the dark. Nothing you can do or say will make you lose me, I love you too much, Jamie. This is it for me."
Jamie stroked her hair again, "Tell me what's wrong. It's not just this, it's more than this."
"It's everything," Eddie replied. "Connie, this thing with Erin, being hurt…being married, I thought that would be easier but…"
Jamie squeezed Eddie's hand as it rest in his. "I know you did. I did too, but we have to hold on just a little more, just a little bit and we have our dream, okay? Hold on with me, don't let go yet. Hold on…"
Jamie's hand held Eddie's so tight, wanting his strength to course through her and help her until she found her own footing again. Jamie knew she would, she is the strongest woman he ever know.
Eddie looked at him with a tear stained face, "I will…you keep me afloat okay? Until I…"
Jamie lifted her head and pecked her lips. "I'm not going anywhere, we're both in this and I'm going to see Erin about this…"
"No," Eddie shook her head. "No, please don't do that, let's really forget that and just start off our day okay? Let's take the kids to get breakfast, it's going to rain but we can watch them play."
Jamie smiled, "Sounds like a plan." Eddie finally met his eyes, "I really am sorry Eddie, there's nothing either of us can do to loose the other. I belong to you and you belong to me."
Eddie held Jamie tight, then got up to get ready for a day with the kids. She rinsed off then sat at her vanity to apply her make up and brush her hair. As Eddie lifted the brush to begin coming her blond locks, she felt Jamie slid the brush from her hands. He moved her hair to the side then laid several kisses on her neck and jawline before gently drawing the brush through her hair over and over. Eddie looked beautiful in her white silk nightie and chenille robe. The lights from the vanity reflecting off her face, "Don't put too much on," Jamie said gently. "You don't need it."
Eddie blushed, but she did lighten the amount of make up shut put on, it felt good to hear that. Jamie found her naturally beautiful.
The brush worked up and down, slow and steady. Eddie leaned into Jamie, relishing his hands on her hair and shoulders. When it was finished, Jamie drew the hair into his hands and pulled the locks into a high, fluffy ponytail. Eddie turned around and smiled at Jamie. He cupped her cheeked in his hands, Jamie leaned down as Eddie leaned up. Their lips met in a deep, stirring kiss. Jamie apologized again with his soft touch, Eddie forgave with her quiet tenderness. Their souls met through their lips…when they pulled back they both were smiling.
