I strongly believe that Bellatrix 'still' has this some kind of hold unto sanity.
Warnings: miscarriage and a sad flashback
I decided to go along with the movies regarding to what had happened with Neville's parents
Chapter 52- Bellatrix and Bernice
Blaise shuddered instantly as his chocolate colored eyes opened. He knew where and what he would see right from the moment he would open his eyes, since Potter had described him- well, barely, as the boy who lived only entered a few details due to his busy schedule- what he would see right in this strange dimension. But really though, he had never thought about believing in such dimension, always thinking about 'once you're dead, you're dead' without acknowledging a portal to another stage of life- or the lack of it there of.
He took a small trip with his wandering eyes, eyeing the vacant express with curious amusement. How could this place be so vacant? After all of these deaths..
Thinking about it, he does not want to know or even see their lifeless eyes blinking, and purple fingertips near him. It would totally creep him out even though he is considered as one of them now.
You're not going to fail Zabini.
When he exited the train, he began to whistle, trying to relax his 'train' of nerves- oh a good pun on that Zabini!. Upon tasting the joke in his own thoughts, he rolled his eyes, snorting as he thought even his own-self is a tough crowd.
Anyway, he has the right to laugh and waste his last minutes with silly puns and jokes, seeing as he has the task of rescuing Draco's brave arse out of his current situation.
Where is that idiot anyway?
"Are you looking for Draco, Blaise?"
He spun clockwise, his back frigid with shock. Relieved and creeped out of the man's knowledge or rather, stalkerish tendency, he nodded sharply, preparing his knuckles for any sort of attack.
A kick to the groin? A punch to the nose?
What to do, how to act.
However, when he turned around, the tensed muscles eased and his mouth hanged slightly open. He does not know how he would acknowledge Dumbledore's presence, feeling conscious with how he was not that respectful towards the wise old man when they were still alive. Blaise was just there, minding his own business as well as leaving Dumbledore with his. He had always thought that the man has a favoritism, which he guiltily still thinks so after all this.
"Yes Sir, have you seen him?" the wise wizard's lifeless eyes bore into his soul as if he was sucking all his thoughts whole. Blaise squirmed from his gaze, glancing down to the white covered floor underneath him, trying to feel the cold that seem to not bother with his temperature.
Dumbledore raised his hand towards him, his index finger prodding right at where his forehead is located.
In his mind, an image of a paler Draco appeared, he seemed to be inside a room filled with picture frames that seem to be moving.
"He mustn't forget these Mr. Zabini. And to yours, you have to secure the precious ones too. You too, shall venture inside Mr. Malfoy's head. Seeing that you purposely went here for Mr. Malfoy, your fate is interlocked with him, if even one of the two of you would fail, then the both of you will have no choice but to join the others"
Blaise eyed the door that appeared out of nowhere. It was made of oak wood, elegant carvings carved unto the frame with silver and green. It must be Draco's.
"And Mr. Zabini? I believe in the two of you. Do not give up"
Luna gasped, halted a few block away from Blaise's body. Beneath his cadaver, Ginny kneeled down upon him with eyes wide and trickling. Her hands were wrapped strongly around his head, hugging his face close to her chest as she weeps, the insane witch opposite them was temporarily forgotten.
Bellatrix's lips were formed into a sinister smile, proud to the damage she had caused. Upon her dark eyes- although she has perfect control of the wand on her hand, her orbs are explosion of splatters and swirls, a collection of nauseatic vibrations that brings out the feeling of disconnect.
The wand on the hand of the insane woman feels like a death threat, tilting unto her bestfriend as if it is ready to strike Ginny down for good. She opened her mouth and words were formed on her venomous tongue, smiling sadistically as they taste coppery on her buds.
Luna threw a pebble that she found laying on the marbled floor to the grieving girl, trying to alert her from the curse that is to come on her way. Ginny whipped her head to Luna's direction, startled by the panic inside Luna's always too dreamy set of eyes. Luna pinpointed out the danger that will lurk, signaling Ginny with her wide eyes and head nodding reassuringly.
She was about to run to give aid to her bestfriend, but then, a death eater decided to have fun and hexed her, seemingly determined to get her down.
Upon the knowledge of the destruction that is to come, Ginny whipped her head back to focus on the war that is being held. Infront of her, just a meter away, Bellatrix's wand seeped a green light towards her direction, based upon the witch that used the spell, and the familiar attack that the mad woman had used before; to the man resting below her, she is about to receive the most unforgivable curse.
Though to the madwoman's expert level of the dark magic, it was quick to travel right to her. With a blink, or rather, a sharp intake of breath, the curse was few seconds apart from touching her skin. She quickly yelled a stupefy, causing the curse to backfire and vanish. But unfortunately, due to the almost incident, her wand on her hand tumbled out from her hand, landing a meter away from her.
Oh for Merlin's sake!
Ginny's eyes widen and unintentionally stared unto the madwoman, who was grinning like a predator. She worked her legs, determined to grab her wand first, although the chances are minimal. Just when she was in her second step, Bellatrix's hex had her, binding her arms and legs to her sides so that she could not move.
Luna saw what had happened, and without another cat and mouse duel with the death eater she was dealing with, she bat bogey hexed them with all her might.
Her breath was ragged, working her legs as fast she could-with trying to make sure to dodge every spell that is being casted on her way- to make there in time.
She calculated the movements, seeing as there's no way she could block the spell in time and in angle if she would use her wand. Gathering up the courage and bravery, she ran, eyes wide and pleading.
Her hands were already on their positions, prepared for their task. She yelled a brief no in response to defying the spell, whilst, stepping unto her last step as to make it to Ginny's side. Ginny looked at her wide eyed, the side of her lips attempting to quirk into a smile; but due to her state, she only stared.
Luna had pushed Ginny and herself, landed to the ground as the spell had almost met the tips of her hair.
Ginny's mouth opened a little bit, her ragged breath entering and escaping; as a result to the adrenaline of escaping a dangerous occurrence. Luna hurriedly patter her wand's location, upon a few attempts, her eyes widen along with Ginny's, both of them wandless and defenseless.
Bellatrix's cacophonous laugh rung to their ears, her shadow dominating the two witches. "What to do? What to do?" she circled the two with their wands held captive in her fist, trapped helplessly as they are now. Luna hoped and prayed, hoping that by some miracle, something good will come to this. "Let us go, psycho!" Ginny mumbled from the center of her mouth and clenched teeth, her determination visible from her threatening stare. Bellatrix let out her shrieks that were deafening, her own wand pointed out dangerously to them.
"It is too late for that now, isn't it blood traitors? The likes of you do not deserve to breathe. Such a disgust to the wizardling world! Low and spiteful like the mudbloods! A bunch of animals that deserve to die and extinct" Bellatrix rumbled, her eyes glaring unto them.
"What to do? What to do?"
Luna eyed the deranged woman infront of her, her once so beautiful self looked as if she had never felt content for the longest time. Her once perfect straight hair were in knots, dead and lifeless, millions of secrets hiding beneath each strands. Who is this person? Is she the same Bella that her mother had talked about? Is that Bella even exist anymore?
"What had happened to you Mrs. LeStrange?" her whisper made the woman stop pacing, her eyes had given a small emotion of sadness, but as sudden as it was, her insane nature had wrapped her again into a tight embrace.
"Crucio!"
Luna gasped and her back arched, her eyes seeing flashes of white. The electrifying effect traveled from her toes up to her brain, shocking her whole body. As a result, she writhed in pain, shrieking painfully and helplessly.
"Crucio!" Next to her, Ginny suffered with a much more intense effect. Luna can feel the anger and sadness through Bellatrix's voice, she can feel her anger pouring through her violence. Ginny let out her torturous groans partnered with heavy tears falling. Upon seeing Ginny helpless and without a fight, she cried alongside her bestfriend, weeping with the pain and agony as their tears were falling in sync with each other.
"Crucio!" Ginny's eyes were puffed with tears, on the side of her mouth trickled droplets of blood. No, I can't stand seeing another loved one die. What about the Weasleys? They don't deserve this. This is all too much for them!.
"Stop please!" Luna shrieked, her eyes snapping back at Bellatrix, begging with all her might. The madwoman halted, her wand midway to cursing another spell at Ginny. When Luna distracted her, there was a small silence that they shared, a scene familiar to Bellatrix that had happened a long time ago.
"Crucio, crucio!" the curse is too much, but doubling them was the death of her. Luna screamed, her voice cracking at the end. It was all too much.
"Stop!"
"Crucio!" her heart was pumping fast, loud enough that her chest hurt. There is something trickling down her mouth, hot and coppery. What's happening?
"Bella, please stop!" she doesn't know where it came from, her eyes had brighten for just a second, and her weak voice just followed a voice that was in her head. The voice sounds soothing, calling her again and again as the mysterious person wrapped her in for a tight hug. She feels her tears cold on her skin, she knows that voice, been dreading for it since she was young and was so scared of the world
"Cruc-"
"Bella!"
Bellatrix LeStrange stopped, her eyes widen without the usual fog of insanity. She dropped her wand defensively, her eyes staring down to the mess that she had made. What have I done? her eyebrows frowned, the tears fell helplessly from her unblinking eyes.
"Bella dear, I'm expecting. Isn't that great?" Bernice exclaimed cheerfully, leaving off her wand unto her work table, as her usual Slytherin smirk was replaced with a kind and hopeful smile. Bella pouted, extremely inconsiderate with whatever her bestfriend is playing. She does not understand. How could this high profiled, proper, smart, charismatic, sarcastic, and beautiful lady pick someone as low and as mad as Xenophilius Lovegood?
"I know what you're thinking Bella. You are wrong you know, it's not the insane part of me talking. In truth, I've never been so sure before him. He had helped me clear all these wrackspurts in my mind and help me see things clearly. Merlin knows I don't deserve him, but yet, here he is, providing me with so much love that I don't deserve and never felt before." Bernice's usual dark colored fancy dress robes were replaced with muggle clothing such as sweat pants and yellow pull over. Bellatrix avoids to scoff at her physical change, fearing the woman's anger of being insulted; Bernice was well known of beingdangerously calm and deadly with debates.
Bellatrix eyed the whole Lovegood manor, sneering at the mismatched furniture and utilities that were so different from what Bernice had chosen to leave behind.
"It's not too late to come back home to your family Bernice. They are still waiting for you to stop whatever charade that you're doing" Bella said softly, her eyes pleading. She could not leave her to this.. wreck. This is suicidal Living in a madman's house. For what they'll know, sooner or later she will die in the hands of the lunatic.
"Can't you see Bella? This is my home now. I'm happy here"
"You are coming with me this instance!" Bellatrix's vision blurred, seeing black spots through different angles.
"No"
"He is insane Bernice! Look at this!, look at him!. There is no future in here!. And that child inside you? It is not too late to 'terminate' 'it'. Come with me now, and this will never be spoken again. You can have your old life back, the jewels, the status, everything" Bernice's eyes shifted unto their cold ones, her body stiff and hands clutched into fists.
"How dare you suggest something so- so insane! I will not leave. Most importantly, I will not 'terminate' 'my child'. It might seem easy to you, to leave things behind, but Bella I feel complete here! How can you be so cruel Bella? Does my happiness mean anything to you? Do you honestly think that I would throw everything I love away just for my status? No. I would not. Come back if you have finally accept the man I love and the 'child' of your bestfriend" Before Bernice could've turned and walked away, Bella grabbed her wrist, clutched it tightly with her long and sharp nails dug to Bernice's skin.
"You will come with me and that's final!" Bernice tries to move away, but the more she moves the more Bella's tight grip tighten. Bernice could've sworn she couldn't feel the blood on her wrist anymore.
"Stop it"
Bellatrix dug her nails deeper, cutting the skin as droplets of blood poured from the nail sized cuts.
"Bella, you're hurting me" Bernice's voice whimpered, trying her hardest to control her temper regarding to what Bella might do if she too, would lose her control.
"Bella!"
Bella's temperament is something that is not well adjusted, she is a woman with blood pure as royalty. She always feel incharge, feeling like she always have to set things in control, and if thing do not get the way she wanted them to be, she explodes. But through panic, Bernice forgot about her delicate patience. She squirmed and yelled for her to stop, feeling helpless without her wand and her smaller height compared to Bellatrix.
Bernice tries to yank Bella's hand away, fearing of doing something drastic incase something would've happen to her child. The baby inside her is a blessing, seeing as her family, well, the Nott family, had a hard time conceiving and was only left with the two of them, her older brother, Theodore and she.
Bellatrix had seemed to have enough. Without a warning, she turned at her,her wrist still in her clutch, and slapped her with force that the blonde hit her head to the pillar beside her and fell unconscious to the ground.
"Bernice?" she whimpered in horror, seeing blood seeping not only from her nose, but also, down below, from her crotch, trickling down to her legs. Panic struck unto her, tears falling down as she gathered her bestfriend into her arms, pleading for her to do something.
When they went to St. Mungo's the healer announced that the child did not make it. And she left not having the heart to face her grieving friend, knowing that she was the one who caused such agony.
It was almost 20 years when she last saw her bestfriend, she never did visit her right after the incident, afraid of what foul words that would come from her mouth. She had killed the child, had gotten her request of terminating it. But she did not want that to happen. Let the other call her murderer, but not her, not her bestfriend who's words speak of wisdom, random wrackspurts, feminism, and 'winning Xenophilius Lovegood someday'.
18 years ago, she had read from the Quibbler- she is keeping tracks with how Bernice is doing- that they are expecting a child. she smiled bitterly as she burnt it and continued her bindings with the dark lord as if nothing happened.
She was sent to Azkaban three months right after the Quibbler incident. One summer morning, she had received a letter. Eyeing the elegant handwriting and the Bella nickname, she opened it with eyes full of worry.
Bella,
I've got a fantastic news the baby is a girl! oh Bella, I'm sorry for not telling you sooner. There is something with fate lately,since I keep on nothing seeing you in Diagon Alley and I can't seem to reach you through floo network.
Is this because of last time? Bella, don't punish yourself. It's not your fault. Let it go, please, before those thoughts will overpower you. Hope we can meet again sooner! Afterall, little Luna needs her godmother"
My regards, Bernice
She had been getting letter every month; things like: "Bella, I'm afraid you're letting it get to you again. I'm sorry, but please, let me help you" or "Are you alright? Please be alright" but she refused to give in. She could not face her, after all, she had enveloped her darkness and welcomed it like a lost friend. She does not deserve to be somebody's godmother. She is bond to be a servant of the dark, to kill merciless and to be ruthless.
You're right
Bernice's last letter, or rather, a letter involving Bernice was 9 years ago, it was a yellow envelope with her full name written on the front. Curious, she opened it. There are only six words in the letter, but her eyes trickled with tears of regret, her no's were being repeated over and over again like a mantra
She's dead Bellatrix. Funeral next week- X.L.'
Bellatrix tried to ignore the signs of tears from Xenophilius in the letter, as well as the ones falling mutely down to her face.
The next week happened, and so was her daily copy of the daily Prophet. She had seen an article regarding the Lovegood family. And immediately, right after she had finished the segment , she knew that the potion for insanity was not for Xenophilius, but it was for to say, she was the one who made her work for the potion, she was the one to be blamed for her death. As the days go by, she had finally surrendered herself to insanity, letting the uncontrollable madness consume her. Bernice did died to a pair of hands of a lunatic; no, not Xenophilius Lovegood, he isn't the mad one, for it was her.
Bellatrix stared right at Luna, her nails making their way to her hair, scratching it as if she had finally lost it."I'm sorry"
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry" A flashback of Luna's frail body with a puddle of blood underneath her trousers entered her mind, sensing a torturous deja vu. Did she kill Luna and Draco's child? Oh no. No!
Let me out
"I'm sorry" she remembered Neville Longbottom, his eyes blank and unblinking, staring at her for the first time. Through those eyes, she saw Frank and his wife, their bodies laid underneath her as they stare lifeless , emotionless and wide. She cannot look at herself, for she knows they mirrored her own.
She clenched and unclenched her hands, her wand forgotten at her side. She kept talking, murmuring names such as Bernice, Frank, and all her other victims.
Infront of her Molly Weasley rushed to her daughter's side, removing the hex that she applied. The vicious mother snapped her hard gaze at her, but she couldn't care any less, she was too focused to the things in her mind.
The agonizing screams of her victims do not stop. There inside her mind, she saw her 11 year old self, in her first day at Hogwarts, the Headmaster, Dumbledore approached her, giving her a chocolate frog to ease her nerves, smiling kindly at her.
And then her vision went to when Dumbledore fell to his death
Then to Andromeda, her pushing her sister off of the family too easily
To Andromeda's daughter and her family. The poor child they have left behind.
Then to Fred Weasley
I'm sorry
Let me out
"Not my daughter you bitch!" the green illuminated from Molly Weasley's wand. She just stared unto it, her eyes twinkling with unshed tearst. She had known death for half of her life, and was usually a contributor of it. But what does it feel like? Is it another never ending sadness? Is it better from here?
She let the curse envelope her, giving in wholeheartedly to it. She deserves a cruel death, yet here she is, being killed with a simple curse that can only give pain for a good few seconds. Good people really don't have any sadistic artistry in their body.
for once in her life, she was the one who screamed. It was not because of the pain though, but she screamed for all of her faults. Her hatred to herself, her refusal, her pride, her mistakes.
Let me out
Before she could disappear into nothingness, her eyes were fixated unto Bernice's daughter, and she found Bernice's eyes starting back at her.
I'm sorry
Let me out
Let me free
I know this does not involve a druna scene, but I just love it if villains have their backstories. Besides, I think Bellatrix and Bernice's friendship needs to have a closure don't you think?
Even though this lacks of Draco and Luna, please kindly leave this kid some reviews. Please?
I'm sorry for the grammatical errors, It's like, nearing midnight herie and I'm kind of in a hurry with typing cause I don't know what time would my father would turn off the internet so... ha. And I am supposed to be studying for my exams but oh well.
Leave a review :) thankyou x
