EndarkenedSanity: Yeah, I don't usually care to shove religion everywhere, but I find different concepts of faith interesting to explore whether through organized religion or something else entirely. So it's probably more accurate to say that I work with those themes more than straight-laced religious ones lol Ha, Lyon will never live down the hot chocolate. Yeah, the "Because" verse was the first time, although it was "Stay". I like to carry things like that through different verses and stories lol It's just hard to throw out stuffed animals. You know, they look at you with those big eyes and you just can't throw them away ;_; Also, I'm a sucker for cute animals lol And ha ha, yeah, now that I think about it, Gray has some similarities with Jack, too. The ice, the stuff with kids, the struggle with people believing in him (although in a different way)... Idk, I just sort of thought of it lol

Guest: Glad to provide some laughter with the heartbreak XD But yeah, I did break him pretty thoroughly, didn't I? X) Oh well, at least things are finally getting better! Thanks for R&Ring :)


Shot Through the Heart


Gray was minding his own business shopping for groceries in the little store down the street when Natsu and Happy came bursting in.

"Gray!" Happy called. "Gray?"

Gray wondered if he had time to escape. Honestly, it was like he was expected to be around his friends all the time, always at the guild or with Lyon at home. Previous isolation notwithstanding, he had always liked to get a little personal space from time to time. Couldn't the world let him have twenty minutes to do his shopping in peace?

But Natsu was sniffing at the air, and Gray knew he'd been outed by that damned nose. Maybe if he was really sneaky…

"Gray!" Happy zeroed in on the despairing ice mage and zoomed over. "We've been looking for you everywhere!"

Gray scowled, realizing that there was no way to duck out of this gracefully anymore, and busied himself checking through cartons of eggs to find a set without any cracks. "What do you want?" he asked tersely, hoping they'd get the message.

"Lucy is missing," Natsu said. "We've gotta go find her."

Seriously? They were bothering him for this?

"Lucy is a big girl. She's allowed to do things without you. Maybe she's just trying to do some shopping in peace, without you hanging all over her…"

"But there was a note!" Happy said.

"A note? Then shouldn't you know where she is?"

"Not that kind of note," Natsu said grimly. "A ransom note."

Gray paused, the eggs halfway in his basket. "Ransom?"

"Someone took Lucy!" Happy wailed.

Natsu nodded, and Gray noticed for the first time exactly how serious his eyes were. "She was gone and there was a note in her apartment."

He pulled a small, crumpled ball of paper from his pocket, smoothed it out, and handed it over. Gray set his basket on the nearest shelf and read over the note. It was short, terse, and to the point, merely stating that 'they' had Lucy and expected an ungodly sum of money as a ransom. Oh, and if the ransom wasn't paid within the next three days or anyone decided to come after them, she would be killed. That last part seemed a little overdramatic to him.

"I guess it's been a while since she's gotten kidnapped," he muttered. "Have you told Erza?"

"Not yet, but she's probably at the guild," Natsu said. "Let's go."

Gray sighed and abandoned his groceries, resigned to starving for another day. Natsu and Happy went hurrying out of the store, and he followed them back to the guild. Someone was going to get their ass kicked for having the nerve to touch Lucy.

"Lucy's been kidnapped!" Happy shouted as soon as they reached the guild.

Gray sighed and rubbed at his temples as everyone was stirred into a confused furor, and he decided to let Natsu and Happy handle the explaining. He was all for going and kicking someone's ass, but he'd rather just go now and get shit done rather than deal with an entire guild full of worried friends.

Cana looked over Erza's shoulder to read the ransom note and whistled loudly. "I could buy a shit-ton of booze with that."

"Think of all the fish," Happy sighed.

"Maybe they recognize her last name and think she's still rich."

"Too bad they don't know that she can't even pay her rent on time…"

"Doesn't matter," Erza grunted. "We'll have to go get her."

"You want some help?" Levy asked, exchanging a look with Gajeel.

"I don't think so. We should be more than a match for these fools, and we'll need to be careful not to let them know we're coming until it's too late. Easier to do that with a smaller party. Where is Lyon?"

Gray shrugged. "He was running some errand or something. I don't track his every move. Either that or he's waiting at the apartment for me to bring food back. Guy's gonna starve."

"That's fine. Seems like a team problem, anyway. Well, we'll need a plan."

That was more like it. Gray was ready to get the show on the road. Slipping around to study the paper with Erza, he tapped a finger on it thoughtfully.

"They'll probably have someone keeping watch over the drop-off point to see if and when we deliver the money," he said. "If we stake it out and catch whoever they left there, we can get information out of them."

Erza nodded slowly. "Even if there isn't someone waiting there the whole time, someone will have to come by to get the cash eventually. We should be there to apprehend them. But we should check her apartment first to see if they left any other clues."

"Hey, guys?" Natsu said.

They ignored him. Natsu was of zero help when constructing plans.

"Definitely," Gray agreed. "It all seems pretty sloppily done, so there's probably something. Maybe we could even find some fingerprints or something."

"Their hideout is probably nearby," Erza added. "They won't want to go too far. Maybe look for likely places within twenty or twenty-five miles?"

"Probably, as long as–"

"Guys."

Gray and Erza turned on Natsu with identical scowls, not happy to have their planning session interrupted. "What?" they said together.

Natsu rolled his eyes. "Or we could just follow their trail. Their scent is all over her apartment, and I can just follow it."

Gray and Erza stared at him. Somehow it seemed like all their planning had been derailed by such a simple suggestion.

"Uh…" Erza rubbed at her nose sheepishly. "Can you follow it the whole way?"

"Probably? My nose is really good… If we run into problems, then we can worry about your dumb, overly complicated plans."

"Seems too simple," Gray muttered mutinously.

"Sometimes simple is better," Natsu said haughtily. "You're just jealous that I'm more useful than you. Not my fault you have a shitty nose."

Gray growled low in the back of his throat but decided to let Natsu have his day in the sun. Whatever worked best for getting Lucy back as quickly and safely as possible.

The guild wished the rescuers good luck, and Gray and the others headed for Lucy's apartment. There were clear signs of a struggle in the bedroom with things knocked over and broken, and Gray nodded grimly. At least Lucy had put up a fight.

But speaking of which…

"Weird," he mumbled. "I don't sense any foreign magical signatures in here."

Lucy's magic was woven into the very fabric of the air, but even that was stale. She hadn't used magic in here too recently, and neither had anyone else. He imagined it would be easiest for mages to perform a kidnapping with aid from their magic. Maybe the kidnappers were either weak mages or not mages at all. But if so, why target a Fairy Tail mage?

"How did they get her, then?" Happy asked. "If they didn't use magic? Lucy should have been able to take them out."

Erza coughed awkwardly. "…They probably snuck in and stole her keys."

Natsu and Happy exchanged a look, and Gray winced. He was glad that he didn't have to rely on carrying something around in order to use his magic—as long as he could use his hands, he could use his ice. Also, he had a bad habit of losing keys.

Lucy had gotten a lot stronger and picked up some new tricks like the star dresses, but she still relied on her keys and would be crippled without them.

"This way," Natsu said. He put his nose to work and led them out of the apartment and down the street, sniffing all the way.

"I sure hope they didn't get on a train," Gray said with a grimace. It would be impossible for even Natsu's nose to track them if they had, given that the train in question would be long gone.

Erza stiffened but then relaxed. "Probably not," she reasoned. "If they took her during the day, there would be too many potential witnesses to notice that something shady was going on and too many opportunities for her to seek help. If they took her at night, which is more likely, I think, there would be fewer trains running which would be inconvenient. Plus, anyone else who happened to be out would be more likely to remember them and it would look kind of shady. I think it's more likely that they set up some sort of private getaway vehicle in advance."

"Carriage," Natsu said.

"Yeah, like a carriage."

"No, I mean this is where the carriage picked them up."

"…Oh."

"Will you still be able to track them?" Gray asked.

Natsu shrugged. "I can't smell Lucy anymore, but I smell the horses. Anyway, we're on the outskirts of the city now." He pointed at the road ahead that exited the city sprawl and disappeared into the surrounding countryside. "There are only so many roads to travel, and it should be fairly obvious if a carriage went off-roading anywhere. I'll just have to pay attention and make sure we don't miss a turn-off or anything."

"Go, Natsu!" Happy cheered. "We'll find Lucy in no time!"

Gray nodded in grudging admiration. About time Natsu was finally useful.

The team trekked alongside the road in the grass to avoid the occasional vehicle speeding past. It occurred to Gray that the kidnappers might have left surveillance on Lucy's apartment and knew exactly what they were doing, but the whole affair seemed too amateurish and poorly conceived to worry too much. This very well might be these guys' first rodeo.

"They probably think we're so weird," Happy muttered as a carriage rolled past and they spotted the occupants giving them funny looks through the window.

"We are weird," Gray said flatly.

"But they don't need to know that."

"…It's hard for people not to know that."

"We can't get a ride or we can't track them," Erza said impatiently. "It is what it is. I'm sure people walk along here all the time."

"Yeah." Natsu grinned smugly. "No transportation today!"

"Just put your nose back to work."

Natsu huffed to himself. "Do you have any idea how hard it is to tell horses from each other? They all smell kind of the same."

Gray didn't have a lot of patience for complaining right now. Teasing and mocking aside, he knew that there was no better nose than Natsu's out here. If it could be done, Natsu would do it. Even if there was some whining and gloating involved.

Gray kept his eyes on the road, studying the tracks and looking for any sign that someone had turned off. He didn't know which wheel ruts in particular were made by their quarry, but any fresh tracks departing from the main road would be worth double-checking. Natsu also kept his attention on the road, watching the tracks and periodically running back onto the path to sniff around and make sure they were still going the right way. Erza and Happy seemed more concerned with looking around to make sure no one was watching or sneaking up on them.

They must have been walking for nearly two hours before getting a new lead. Another small dirt track had peeled off the main road, and Natsu spent a few minutes sniffing around before nodding.

"They turned off here."

"I'll take your word for it," Erza said. "Time to start being more cautious, alright?"

The little path wound gently through the countryside for a couple of miles. Occasionally outbuildings could be seen nearby, but Gray didn't spot anyone peeking out from the windows. They all seemed rundown and long-abandoned, but it made him antsy. The team was exposed out here, with not much to hide them from view. As such, their caution was offset by their haste.

A large building loomed ahead with three neat rows of windows staring out at them like a hundred glass eyes. It would have been an impressive mansion if it wasn't so shabby and decrepit. The siding was falling off, the roof was missing tiles, and the entire building looked like it was on its last legs, but he noted that the windows were fitted with new glass and the lawn and greenery were well-kept. Maybe someone was fixing it up. It must have been a pretty impressive property once, before the outbuildings had been abandoned and the mansion had fallen into disrepair.

The team slipped through a creaky wrought-iron gate hanging off one hinge and hurried across the yard, finding as much cover as they could along the way. Anyone could be watching them from the windows.

Natsu led them around behind the mansion and stuck his head into some kind of dilapidated shed. Or stable. Something. There were a couple horses stabled inside that whickered softly at the intrusion, and a battered carriage was crammed inside on the other end.

"Maybe they just want money to add to their home renovation budget," Gray said dryly.

"They took the right person, then," Happy said with a snicker. "Lucy loves redecorating."

"Don't remind me," Gray muttered, thinking back to when she had taken over his apartment.

Erza shot them each an unamused look. "Let's just get Lucy."

"And beat some people up," Natsu added.

Creeping back around the building, they found a side door. It was locked but rotted through, so Natsu knocked it off its hinges without a problem. Gray winced at the sound of splintering wood in the dead quiet, but he knew it wasn't really as loud as it sounded to his ears. He pushed the broken door back into place and propped it up, hoping it wouldn't be as noticeable that it had been tampered with if someone happened by.

Although the chandeliers and sconces were old and chipped, the interior was well-lit. At least they'd be able to see. From somewhere deeper inside the mansion, a muted voice said something.

Erza gave the boys a warning look to make sure they stayed quiet, and they all crept further inside. By the time they'd passed several branching hallways and a fair smattering of doors and reached the end of a long corridor to see the bottom of a narrow auxiliary staircase, they were aware that this would be a difficult task.

"This is the back of the building," Gray mused in a quiet voice. "The servants' quarters, maybe. Or the out-of-the-way living spaces. It's basically a labyrinth back here. Maybe the front is where all the big rooms and open layouts are. Which makes it more likely that they're holding Lucy somewhere back here."

"This place is huge," Erza muttered. "We're going to have to split up. Gray, take the top floor. Natsu and Happy can take the second, and I'll do the ground floor. Be careful. We don't want them to know we're here."

"They might already know," Happy said. "If anyone was looking out while we were walking up…"

"I know. I almost want to stay in a group in case they're expecting us and set a trap, but it would take way too long to search this place."

"Agreed," said Gray. "It wouldn't be practical. On the bright side, I'm still not sensing a lot of magic and this whole thing seems to be an exercise in incompetence, so we should be able to hold our own even if we split up."

"That was my thought as well," Erza agreed, "but be careful anyway. Underestimating opponents can get you into trouble."

He wondered if that was a veiled reference to the soul-swapping dark guild and its utterly incompetent trap, but decided to give her the benefit of the doubt. He was hardly the only one to have gone into something overconfident and had it come around to bite him.

He took the stairs quickly, only pausing when his foot plunged through a rotten board. He was more careful after that, but he knew he needed to hurry. It was only a matter of time before they ran into someone. His money was on Natsu. The second Gray heard fireballs blasting downstairs, he'd know the game was up. Hopefully, they would have found Lucy by then.

The stairs widened into a hallway half-covered in a long, moth-eaten rug. He pushed open the first door to find a small room crammed with dusty, broken furniture. Storage, maybe? The next several rooms he checked were also little more than glorified closets for old, broken things, but they became gradually larger and more organized as he worked his way toward the front of the building. And better-maintained. More livable.

There were different living spaces, gathering places, bedrooms, even a small library. Some of the furnishings had been replaced or repaired, walls repainted, and furniture swept free of dust. Maybe someone was restoring the old building one room at a time.

Occasionally Gray could hear muffled voices emanating from somewhere deeper within, but he hadn't heard any shouts of alarm. Hopefully that meant their presence still remained undetected.

Wood scraped softly along the floorboards as a door opened up ahead. He froze as a lean, brown-haired man stepped into the hallway. The man started to turn, and Gray made a snap decision. He had no easy hiding place, and the man's eyes were already widening in alarm.

Gray leapt forward and slammed an ice hammer over the guy's head before he could yell and stir up a fuss, and the man's eyes rolled back as he collapsed. Gray snuck a peek into the room his unwary prey had just exited and found that it was empty. Thank goodness.

He dragged the unconscious man back inside and shoved him behind an armchair. Then he froze the guy over for good measure in case he woke up and pressed the heels of his palms to his eyes.

"Awesome," he muttered to himself.

And here he had been so sure that it was Natsu who would give them away first. He could feel their already limited time slipping through his fingers. Someone would go looking for this guy eventually or spot him stuffed behind the furniture in a frozen lump. It would have been better to remain unseen rather than create a liability, but there was nothing for it now.

He closed the door behind him and began searching rooms with a renewed sense of urgency. As an extra measure of precaution he tried teasing out the shadows to help cloak himself, before remembering that he was a pathetic demon who couldn't use his curses properly anymore. They weren't responding, so he just cursed under his breath and stuck to the walls where he was at least a little less conspicuous than being smack-dab in the middle of the hall.

He skipped over a room that had voices coming from inside and continued on. He was already frustrated with his lack of success by the time he found a door that was locked. Making short work of the lock with his ice, he opened the door into a room that was entirely empty aside from Lucy huddled against the far wall. It had been stripped bare of everything, presumably as a precaution so that she couldn't find anything useful to help her break out, and her hands were chained behind her back in a very uncomfortable-looking fashion.

"Lucy!" He stepped inside, but immediately froze as his connection to his magic snapped and his chest filled with crushing emptiness. "What the–?"

He half-turned to see a line of runes scratched across the doorway, and his eye followed them as they skirted around all the walls as well. He didn't know much about runes, but these looked fairly simple. Either they did know a little magic after all, or they'd found someone else to do it for them.

His impression was that they were not mages. Otherwise they should have been smart enough to put the line of runes far enough out to cross just ahead of the door instead of just after as an extra precaution to stop mages from breaking in. An oversight.

"Gray!" Lucy stirred and perked up. "Yeah, they have anti-magic runes to keep me contained and keep you out. But you came!"

"Of course," he said shortly, turning away from the bothersome glyphs to cross the room. The last time they had tangled with runes, it hadn't ended well. He steadfastly pushed aside the dark thoughts clamoring at the edges of his mind. "Are you alright?"

"Fine, fine. Although it wasn't very nice to be woken up in the middle of the night by a bunch of guys tying me up!"

There was a purple bruise blooming on her cheek. Gray's eyes narrowed dangerously, but all he said was, "They aren't even mages, are they?"

Lucy turned as much as the chain would allow so that he could examine it. Her hands were cuffed together and then attached to the wall with a metal plate. Gray's ice would make short work of this, but with his magic temporarily unavailable… He began the tedious process of trying to coax, cajole, and manhandle his curses to do his bidding.

"No…" Lucy sighed. "Apparently this guy was some tycoon that my father screwed over. He lost his fortune and ended up in jail, and now he and his family are out for blood and want me to pay back what my father took."

"…Your father died a long time ago."

The shadow that passed over Lucy's face wasn't visible since her back was to Gray, but it was palpable in her voice. "Yes, well, they know that. I think they've gone a little crazy, honestly. Spent too long holed up in their crumbling mansion stewing in their resentment and bitterness."

Gray wanted to scream in frustration as the shadows kept slipping through his fingers. Even his own shadow was staying stubbornly still.

Come on!

Let us in. Let us go.

I'm trying!

"They have your keys?"

"Yeah." The embarrassment practically oozed into Lucy's voice. "The leader guy took them. The tall one with the weird birthmark under his eye."

Gray paused his fruitless struggle and frowned at the back of her head. "You saw their faces? They didn't wear masks or anything?"

"They did when they first showed up at my apartment, but they took them off once we got here. Why?"

Either they were extremely incompetent kidnappers…or they were never planning to let Lucy go. Gray's lips tightened and he renewed his efforts. His general impression of people new to the whole 'bad guys' game was that they didn't usually have the guts to kill or seriously maim anyone, but he wasn't taking any chances.

A loud crash and shouting echoed somewhere below, and Gray bit out a curse.

"There goes Natsu," he growled.

There was no more time to waste here. If the kidnappers realized that there was a rescue operation active here, they'd likely come check to make sure Lucy was still trapped. By that time, she couldn't be trapped anymore.

"Can't you just use your curses?" Lucy asked, fidgeting nervously.

"I'm trying," he grumbled. "Man, Erza and her swords would be really useful right about now."

Obviously Erza should have taken this floor, since Gray was utterly useless now that he'd seriously crippled his curses. The cuffs were solid and wouldn't budge no matter how he pried at them, so he followed the chain back to the metal plate on the wall. That might be the weak spot.

He scrabbled at it helplessly and was just starting to find the barest hint of purchase when running footsteps pattered up the hallway and came to an abrupt stop.

"Hey!" someone yelled. "Get away from her!"

Gray cursed again and turned to see a man and woman stepping through the doorway, both with the same brown hair and freckled skin even though their eye color and ages were different. Family, maybe.

"Oh no," Lucy breathed.

"Scream," he said grimly.

"What?"

"Make sure Natsu and the others can find us."

Lucy got the idea and started calling out for Natsu, creating a homing beacon to get the rest of the team over here. The kidnappers were saying something, but Lucy's caterwauling was ringing in Gray's ears.

He moved like lighting, slamming his fist into the man's face and jabbing his other elbow into the woman's stomach. He might not have his magic, but it was still a mistake to underestimate him. His opponents weren't trained fighters, and he sent them stumbling back under a barrage of crushing blows.

The woman toppled over and scrambled back frantically, her movements awkward from the injuries she had sustained, and Gray let her go. He shoved the persistent man up against the wall and was about to slam another fist into his face when a new man appeared in the doorway.

"Stop!" the newcomer shouted.

Gray slammed the unlucky fool he was holding to the floor and turned on the tall newcomer. He started forward, but the man's hand whipped out and a deafening bang split the air. Pain lanced through Gray's leg like white-hot lightning and he stumbled.

The guy behind him regained his feet to grab the demon's arm and twist it behind his back, and Gray didn't have the presence of mind to protest when he snatched up the other as well. Blood flowed down his leg in thick rivulets, and he blinked at it uncomprehendingly before looking up and finding himself staring into the muzzle of a gun.

"Shut up," the man growled, flourishing the gun in Lucy's direction.

She fell silent, and Gray could only hope that it had been enough. He could already tell that this guy was the leader, both from his air of easy arrogance and the birthmark under his eye that Lucy had helpfully warned him of.

"Go help Mark restrain him," the leader said as another mousy-haired, middle-aged man hurried up. The guy nodded and rushed inside toward Gray. "Now, you–"

Gray tossed his head back, taking grim satisfaction in the crunch of his assailant's already broken nose fracturing further, and slammed down on the man's ankle with the heavy boot of his uninjured leg. There was a sharp cry from behind him and he suddenly found himself free.

He lunged for the new guy coming toward him. Pain stabbed through his leg and he stumbled, but he still managed to swing around and send the guy flying with a well-aimed punch. Now ignoring the two goons, he rushed the leader.

"Stop!" the leader cried. "Stop or I'll shoot your other leg."

That gave Gray the briefest moment of pause, but the rest of the team should be on their way and hopefully they'd make it in time to finish things off if he went down.

"Stop or I'll shoot her," the leader amended, turning the gun on Lucy.

Gray stopped. He still wasn't entirely sure if this guy would really shoot to kill, but it wasn't a risk he was willing to take when Lucy couldn't defend herself.

The leader nodded to someone behind Gray, and the newest guy grabbed him and twisted his arms behind his back again. Gray ground his teeth together in impotent fury.

"I should've known you would cross me." The leader stepped into the room and gave both Gray and Lucy a disdainful once-over. "You should have just handed over the money."

"In case you hadn't noticed," Gray said sourly, "Lucy isn't exactly an heiress anymore. Her dad lost his fortune. And he's also dead and has been for a long time."

"Yes, it was a disappointment to hear that the Heartfilia fortune is no longer ripe for the picking, but I'll have my revenge on the Heartfilias one way or another."

"Again, her father is long dead."

"And I didn't do anything!" Lucy added indignantly.

The depth of hatred in the leader's eyes when he looked at Lucy made Gray squirm uncomfortably. It reminded him of how people looked at him as a demon.

"I can't believe Jude had the gall to die before I could get my hands on him," the man snarled. Gray set his teeth against the pain in his leg and shot a glance at the doorway. If they could just keep this guy talking until the rest of the team arrived… "But I'll take what I can get. You know that her father ruined me?

"Unscrupulous fellow. We were business partners, once upon a time. And then he stabbed me in the back. I lost everything. My fortune, my family, my home. He even got me thrown in jail by blaming his own illegal activities on me. By the time I got out, he was dead. But that's not good enough. He made me and my family suffer. Just look at the state of our prized home! I've been working to rebuild our fortune and repair this place, but if you aren't going to help, I'll just do it on my own. I was a self-made man before, too.

"In the end, all I want is the girl." He smiled and pointed the gun at Lucy's chest. "I was always going to kill her. It's my revenge on her and her damned family."

Lucy squeaked and squirmed, but she didn't have enough room to get out of the way. Gray growled low in the back of his throat.

"Whoa, wait," said the guy holding him. "I thought we weren't going to hurt her? We just want the money."

"Hush," the leader snapped. "Her family ruined me, and I'll ruin her family. Don't be such a coward."

"But that's not right," the woman on the floor protested, her uneasy conscience written all over her face.

This guy was totally bonkers, twisted by years of loss and prison and a burning desire for revenge, and he had duped his own family into his scheme under the pretense of regaining their fortune. They still weren't great people for going along with it, but this guy was the real threat.

"Oh well," the leader said. "Goodbye, girl. I've waited a long time to get rid of Jude's brat."

Gray lunged forward, twisting out of his captor's grip, but he already knew it was too late even if his injured leg didn't send him stumbling again. The gun was already firing, the sound ricocheting off the walls, and Lucy screamed.

"Lucy!" Gray yelled.

He would do anything—anything—to turn back the clock just a few moments and do things differently. He would do anything to stop this from happening.

And he couldn't, which sent his heart twisting in a way so painful that he couldn't breathe.

A flash of movement whipped past him and darted across the floor faster than thought. An expanse of inky blackness reared up in front of Lucy to absorb the bullet.

Searing pain stabbed through his heart like the white-hot pain of a gunshot, and Gray clutched at his chest with a wheezing gasp of disbelief. What…?

Black ate away at the edges of his vision and he swayed precariously. He thought he might have gotten a blurry view of his shadow snapping at Lucy's cuffs and lunging for the man with the gun, but his mind was so fuzzy that he might have been imagining it.

The pain took over everything, coursing through his veins like fire, and he collapsed to the floor, everything going black with only the sound of Lucy's screaming to break his daze until that too disappeared.


Lucy sat in the infirmary, in the same chair she'd been sitting in almost without breaks for the past thirty-six hours or so. Her body was aching from sitting still for so long, so she stretched briefly and pulled her feet up to balance on the very edge of the chair. Resting her cheek on her knee, she studied Gray silently.

He still hadn't woken up.

He had collapsed after his shadow saved her from the bullet, clutching at his chest with a stunned expression on his face as if he'd just had a heart attack. His shadow had broken through Lucy's restraints and pummeled her attacker into unconsciousness—although it hadn't killed him, which Lucy was relieved by since it seemed a little more fond of killing things than Gray was—before swiping at the other kidnappers lurking about the room and settling around Gray.

It had continued twitching and fidgeting about like a living thing and snapped at anyone who got too close. If Lucy didn't know how much Gray hated it, she would have said that it was being awfully protective of him. It had settled and let the team touch him, but got antsy whenever anyone else approached.

It was still a little more alive than it should be even now, inky tendrils standing out in sharp contrast as they curled around Gray's pale skin. Lucy had no idea what was going on, not least of all because Gray had been having so many problems with his curses and shadow lately.

Wendy had healed the bullet wound in his leg, but neither she nor Porlyusica could find anything else wrong with him. No sign of any kind of cardiovascular crisis, and there wasn't enough blood loss to account for his collapse and prolonged period of unconsciousness. It was a mystery that had everyone on edge, because no one could do anything to help.

Everyone dropped by frequently, and Lyon was, of course, a huge pain in the neck. The team kept coming to check up on Gray's state, but also to try convincing Lucy to take a break and get some rest.

She was resistant to these pleas, despite some very rational arguments that Gray wasn't going to wake up any faster if she was here and someone was always going to be with him even if she took a few hours to get some sleep. It was, after all, her fault that Gray was in this position to begin with. She had been careless and stupid and weak enough to get caught by a handful of fools with a grudge against her dead father, and Gray and the others had only been in harm's way because of her and her inability to take care of herself.

She reached unconsciously for her keys and grasped them tightly enough that the metal bit into her skin. She was so dependent on these things that it wasn't even funny, and their loss had left her crippled and unmoored and defenseless. Even the thought of losing them again left her panicky and nervous.

"Lu…cy?"

Her eyes snapped to Gray's face, and her heart jumped when she saw that his eyes were halfway open and watching her with a strangely befuddled expression.

"Gray!" Lucy nearly toppled off the chair, but luckily she dropped her feet to the ground to steady herself just in time. "You're awake!"

"I guess so… Are you alright?"

"Am I alright?" she repeated with an incredulous laugh. "You're the one who collapsed and has been unconscious for a day and a half."

"Really?"

Gray struggled to sit up, but fell back with a pained hiss of air escaping through his clenched teeth. His eyes screwed shut as his hand fisted in his shirt and he curled convulsively around his heart.

"Gray!" Lucy said in alarm. "Are you okay?"

Gray took a minute to collect himself and then carefully wriggled upright with the aid of a pillow he propped up against the headboard. His face was still tight with pain.

"Fine…I think." He shook his head slowly and studied her face. "What happened?"

"Your shadow saved me and then you collapsed. It broke me free and took out that jerk, but it didn't kill him or anything. Natsu and the others showed up right after. The one guy went to jail and we let the others go with a warning, I think. We were more worried about getting you back here, but other than the bullet in your leg, we couldn't find anything wrong with you. Everyone is worried, and Lyon is really pissed off."

"Why are you crying, Lucy?"

She rubbed at her eyes hastily and looked away. "I just feel so…useless and weak. All I ever do is get myself into trouble, and then you get hurt rescuing me. I'm sorry."

"You're useless?" Gray coughed out a raspy, unamused laugh. "I'm the one who couldn't even get my curses to work in time to get you out."

Lucy blinked at him in surprise. He had made it sound like he'd been glad to get rid of his curses, and she hadn't realized how much it might still really bother him. Gray had always been so strong and confident, and Lucy had a hard time imagining that he could feel weak and useless too. It boggled her mind a little, but she also wondered why she had never really considered it.

"But you did get your shadow to save me in the end," she said gently.

"No, she did that on her own." He frowned down at the shadow draped across the bed like it was a puzzle that needed solving. "It's a curious thing."

"O-oh?"

"You aren't weak or useless, Lucy. We all have our moments of weakness where we rely on each other for help, and that's okay." He gave her a tired smile and she flushed. Then he winced and rubbed at his chest again. Pulling his shirt away from his skin, he peered down critically. "Are you sure he didn't get me? It definitely feels like I took a shot through the heart."

"Nope, there's nothing wrong with you that we can see. Wendy and Porlyusica checked."

"That's really weird. Unless…" Gray looked down at his shadow and crooked a finger. "Come here, love. Let me take a look at you."

Lucy watched curiously as the shadow obediently curled up toward Gray and he reached inside. After rummaging around, he pulled out his Book.

"Oh," he said. "That would explain it."

Lucy slid closer and blanched. The icy layer protecting the cover had a spiderweb of cracks radiating out from the hole carved into the center. And inside the hole, buried in a nest of torn pages before it had been forced to a stop, was a bullet.

"Oh," she breathed. "Are you–are you alright?"

If he had a bullet in him, Wendy could pull it out and heal him. But a bullet in his Book? Lucy had no idea what to do about that.

"Yeah. It hurts like hell and probably will for a while, but it's not going to kill me."

"Can we…can we fix it?"

Gray shook his head. "Damage the Book, damage the demon. But it's alright. The damage is kind of permanent, but it should start fading over time. It'll heal in its own way, even if it won't go away. I think this is a big enough scar that I'll feel it for a while."

He rubbed at his chest absently with his free hand and blew out an irritated breath. Lucy's hands bunched helplessly in her skirt and her lips trembled. That was what she had been afraid of. What if it didn't fade as much as Gray thought and just hurt him forever? He had just gotten injured permanently trying to save Lucy.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, trying to smother her sniffle.

"It's not your fault," he said gently. "If anything, it's mine. It probably just didn't manifest correctly."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, my shadow is sort of…between two worlds, so to speak." He frowned and scratched at his head, searching for a way to explain it. "Like, shadows are basically just there—they can't really interact with the world, and you can't interact with them directly. Your hand would go right through. But mine can also manifest more physically, as I'm sure you've noticed. It takes a lot of energy to manifest like that, though, which it gets from me. I think it's been so finicky lately because I've been holding on to control so tightly that it can't get the energy it needs to manifest properly most of the time.

"It must have somehow pulled itself together enough to interact with the bullet, but not enough to interact fully. It wasn't solid enough to stop it on its own, but it had enough control to make the bullet pass through the interdimensional space inside it instead of straight through, where it got stuck in my Book rather than hitting you." He rubbed at his nose sheepishly. "Or…something like that. I don't know if that really makes sense. It's hard to explain."

"Not entirely, but I think I get the gist of it. I just wish…"

"It's alright." Gray offered her a small flash of a smile and then looked down at his shadow as it curled around his hand and Book. "Good girl, Deli. It looks like we're finally on the same page for once."

His smile was a little puzzled, a little wary, but also held genuine warmth. Lucy didn't think she'd ever seen him smile at his shadow in a way that wasn't hostile. This might actually be the closest thing to affection that he'd ever shown it.

"Deli?" she repeated. "Did you name it, then?"

He might have called it that a handful of times, but she thought it had only started recently and wasn't sure what had precipitated the change. She didn't know enough about it to determine if it was a good change or not.

"What?" Gray gave her a puzzled look that slowly morphed into sly amusement until his eyes sparkled like he was laughing at her on the inside. "Something like that."

"Okay?"

Lucy didn't know what to make of his odd reaction, but she didn't have time to press any further before he looked back down and paused. His amusement faded as his lips quirked downward, and he ran his thumb absently along the spine of his Book.

"Lucy? Do you mind if I…ask your opinion on something?"

"Huh? Of course not. What is it?"

He was silent for a long time before asking, "What do you think it means?"

Lucy had no idea what he was talking about, but followed his gaze down to his Book. Leaning over, she joined him looking down at his name scrawled across the cover just below 'Deliora' and the bullet hole. She reached out almost automatically before stopping and shooting him an uncertain look. It felt too personal to touch without his consent, like she was touching his very soul.

But he just nodded, and she tentatively let her fingers brush against the cover with a feather-light touch. The shattered ice twinkled and dissipated into the air, startling her, and her fingers were left to run over the worn leather. She traced over the letters of his name gently.

He twitched, a funny look flickering over his face before he smoothed out his expression again, and she wondered how much he could feel. Hurting his Book would hurt him, but she didn't know if he could feel whatever else interacted with it.

She flushed, finding that rather personal and strangely intimate, and withdrew her hand.

"I think it means," she said quietly, "that who you are has changed. You said that what's written in your Book defines you, right? But that defined…Deliora. You know, what Zeref created. Your bond to it was broken and you started rewriting yourself. When you were bound back, it changed your name to Gray because you changed to Gray. You aren't what's written there anymore—you're more than that now. So…I think that you rewrote something in your Book even though you didn't think it was possible, and I think that you rewrote yourself into who you are now instead of being held back by what you were."

Lucy chewed on her lower lip. She wasn't sure if she had conveyed what she wanted to say, but she hoped she had.

She also wondered why this was coming up now. She would have thought that Gray would have figured this out back in the beginning, had thought by his reaction that he understood how momentous it was. Well, he had clearly known that it was important and been moved by it, but maybe he hadn't fully understood why. And it was okay if that took some time, it was just…

Why hadn't he found those answers back when he was doing so well before? After he'd made up with Lyon and had been so much happier? If he had been doing so well, why hadn't he come to terms with himself? Had she and the others failed him even then, thinking he was okay when he wasn't?

Gray nodded slowly. "Maybe so," he mumbled under his breath. Shaking his head sharply as if to banish his thoughts, he molded a knife of ice and skillfully twisted the tip in the hole and around the bullet until the offending object popped out. He offered it to Lucy with a toothy smile. "Souvenir?"

Lucy took it automatically, even though she had no idea what she might do with a spent bullet. It rolled around in her palm, glinting dully in the light. The bullet that had been aimed for her heart but had pierced Gray's instead.

"Uh…thanks?"

Ice spread over the Book, sealing it over once again, and Gray shoved it back into his shadow. When he pulled his hand out, the Book had been replaced by Binkie. Lucy smiled despite herself. Watching him carry Asuka's stuffed animal around was actually rather adorable.

"Now I guess we just–" He broke off and turned Binkie over in his hands. "Oh no! I ruined Binkie! What am I going to tell Asuka?"

His finger had caught in the hole torn into Binkie's little chest, and he stared down in horror before flipping the toy over to confirm that there was, in fact, an exit wound along its back. He wore an utterly devastated expression as he shoved bits of escaped stuffing back into the dog.

Lucy winced. The bullet must have gone straight through Binkie before lodging into the Book.

"It's okay," she said, trying to calm him down. "We can just sew him up."

Gray paused. "Can you sew?"

"Well… I'm not, like, an expert, but I know a little bit." She took the dog from him to better survey the damage. The holes were rather big, unfortunately. She pulled together the edges of the hole on its back experimentally. "I could sew this hole shut…but then it pulls the other hole wider. We might have to patch that one."

"Patch?" The newfound hope faded from Gray's eyes. "You can't hide a patch."

"We can find some fabric that matches, I think. It's worth a shot."

Gray smiled despite himself. "Nice pun."

Lucy flushed. "I didn't mean–"

"Thanks, Lucy."

"No problem." She relaxed and shook her head in fond exasperation. "I'll bring some things in tomorrow and we can fix him, alright? But for now, I'm going to let everyone know you're awake. They've been worried."

"Okay." He smiled sheepishly. "Don't tell Asuka."

"Of course not," she said with a laugh.

She ducked out of the room to make her announcement, and was nearly trampled in the ensuing stampede. It seemed like everyone wanted to fuss over Gray…or pretend not to.

"Seriously?" Lyon demanded, bracing his hands on his hips. "I can't even leave you alone for five minutes before you get into trouble! And you didn't even get food first! There's nothing to eat."

"You can eat in the guild," Gray muttered. "Or buy your own groceries."

"…I did."

"Then what are you complaining about?"

Natsu was equally unimpressed. "I can't believe you got taken out by those wimpy dudes."

Gray's eye twitched, but he brightened a little when Chelia shoved past Lyon none too gently to join him at the bedside.

"I heard you got hurt," she said. "Lyon was freaking out, and Sherry and I came down."

Lyon flushed. "I was not."

Everyone snickered, knowing better.

"Good to see you, kiddo," Gray said with a smile, before wincing and clearly making an effort not to reach for his chest.

"We're glad you're up," Erza said, "but what happened?"

So Gray had to go through the whole story again, and then try to allay all the fears and worries it dredged up. Natsu, in particular, looked disturbed by the explanation. Maybe, Lucy reflected, because he had once been bound to a Book as well.

"There's really nothing I can do?" Wendy asked. "I mean, can I help get rid of the pain or anything?"

Gray shook his head. "I don't think so. It'll fade on its own like any other wound, but it'll always be there and I don't think you can heal it when it's damage that's bound to my Book and not my body."

"You are the absolute worst, most difficult patient ever," Porlyusica growled from where she'd been lurking in the corner. "Broken bones, magic deficiency, poisoning, illness… Nooo, not good enough for you. I'm tired of getting called down here for all your ridiculous injuries that I can't even do anything about. If I get called here for something so ridiculous again, I will kill you myself and put an end to it."

Gray blinked at her, taken aback. "Uh…sorry? Again?"

She stalked over and thrust a bottle at his chest. "More sleeping potion, for when you need it. Stop getting into so much trouble."

She spun on her heel and flounced out, and everyone stood frozen until they heard the outside door to the guild slam shut. Lucy didn't know who started laughing first, but soon everyone was in an uproar.

She smiled and relaxed. Maybe things would be alright after all.

When she went home that evening, she dug through all her storage until she found a basket of fabric scraps that she had collected but never really used. They were mostly the remnants of all the clothing that got destroyed on jobs. She'd always kept them 'just in case', but never found a use for them. Sadly, she didn't wear much brown.

Still, she brought them with her to the guild the next day, along with everything she would need to do a little sewing. Gray had been confined to the infirmary for the night since he wasn't able to take more than a step without being in very obvious pain. He had been a bit sulky about the enforced bedrest, but Wendy could be nearly as scary as Porlyusica when she wanted to be, and she even had Chelia to back her up.

"Ready to fix Binkie?" Lucy asked as she slipped into the infirmary and settled on the chair beside the bed.

Gray was awake and sitting up against the pillow on the headboard. He flicked his fingers and his shadow, which had been resting on the bed with him, slid back down to the floor. Lucy eyed it curiously, wondering what had been going on there.

"Yep," he said. "Alright, Master Lucy. Teach me how to sew. I messed Binkie up, so I'm going to fix him."

Lucy almost protested that she could do it for him—and, she might add, get it done much faster than if she had to teach him and watch him fumble through it himself—but restrained herself. If he felt responsible, who was she to stop him? Asuka had done something special by giving him Binkie in the first place, and Lucy understood that Gray would want to safeguard and repay that.

So she demonstrated the most basic sewing technique…with the patience of a saint. Gray did not take to sewing. His stitches were uneven and skewed, and he quickly became frustrated.

"Why is it so hard?" he mumbled, grimacing as he stabbed himself with the needle yet again. "It doesn't look like it should be that hard."

"It's not that hard," Lucy muttered.

But he was insistent that he do it himself, so she resigned herself to her arduous task. They had been at it for much too long by the time Chelia came strolling in.

"Whatcha doing?" she asked.

"Learning how to sew so that I can fix Binkie," Gray said with a sigh, nodding to the injured stuffed animal watching over his struggles from the bedside table.

"I can sew!" Chelia said. "Like this!"

She hopped up onto the bed and snatched up a spare needle and scrap of fabric. Lucy paused her lesson to watch, but eventually shook her head. She couldn't compete for Gray's attention with Chelia. They seemed to have some sort of odd little bond.

"I'm going to grab some lunch," she said. "Let me know if you need anything."

Gray flashed her a smile. "Thanks, Luce."

She left them to it, heads bowed close together as they tried to figure it out. It would save her the aggravation, at least.

She felt better after getting something to eat, and then got sucked into one of Natsu and Happy's many arguments. And then into Erza's gushing about strawberry cake. And then into Natsu and Erza's argument when Natsu inadvertently insulted Erza's strawberry cake.

It was a few hours later when Lucy noticed Gray showing Binkie to Asuka on the other side of the room.

"He got hurt in a fight," he was saying. "I'm sorry. But Lucy and Chelia helped me patch him up."

Asuka didn't seem bothered, despite Gray's worry. "You fixed him! Doctor Gray-nii!" She giggled.

Gray smiled a little. "Yep, that's me."

"That's kind of pathetic," Natsu muttered.

Lucy raised an eyebrow at him. "It's cute."

"Exactly."

"…You're cute sometimes too."

"I am not!"

"You gave Binkie a heart!" Asuka said loudly.

Lucy twisted around to get a better look. Instead of picking the fabric that would blend in the most, Gray had given up and cut a large heart out of red fabric. It was sewed on with neat, precise stitches, which were more characteristic of his usual precision but seemed mindboggling after his horrible sewing attempts earlier.

"I did," Gray said sheepishly.

Asuka smiled up at him. "Does he help fix your heart too?"

Ah, children. So innocent and naïve, yet somehow cutting straight to the heart of the matter. Lucy watched Gray carefully as he swallowed hard and stared down at the stuffed dog in his hands. One corner of her mouth twitched upward.

"Yeah," Gray said quietly, his fingers brushing over the little dog's heart. "Yeah, he does."


emmahoshi: Sure, there's a difference between being alone because you want to and being alone because you don't have a choice X) It's nice that you're bringing them presents (and food, even! :O). Ha, yeah, the joke is more that Lucy gets kidnapped ridiculously often in canon and fanfic. I don't usually do that because it gets annoying, but I miiight've been poking a little bit of fun at it here lol Ah, I'm artsy, but my mom is the one who can sew. Although she mostly cross-stitches. I also appreciate water in all forms except for Juvia XD Ha ha, yes, a lot of these titles have both a literal and metaphoric component, because that's who I am as a person X)