Chapter 52
We're on our way back to London. It's early evening and my little family is knackered after this exiting, so important weekend. James has snuggled into his seat and is sleeping peacefully. Even during these short two days, he has gained colour and he looks very healthy with his blonde hair tousled over his tanned face.
I look over and I suppose a smile creeps over my face. I have to be careful not to move, as Louisa's head is resting against my shoulder. She has fallen asleep and is lightly snoring. I feel her warmth against my right side and it doesn't only warm my body, but it soothes and warms me inside as well. I try to stay as motionless as possible so as not to disturb her sleep. I concentrate on her breath that I feel against my neck. I never thought a light flutter like that could be so enjoyable. Her breath is going regularly. I peek down to catch a glimpse of her face. She looks calm and maybe there is even a hint of a smile. Her hair is still pulled back into a ponytail. She is back home.
I can't help but feel content about the outcome of this weekend. I will have to explain a lot to Robert tomorrow and I hope I can persuade him to transfer me to the hospital in Truro to supervise the research project there. I will have to commute a bit longer, but at least Louisa can live where she feels at home.
Even James seemed happier in Portwenn. He managed after not even an hour what I couldn't do during all these years – he had found friends. He hasn't got many friends in London. Maybe Louisa had passed the Cornish gene to him.
I tilt my head a bit to rest my head on Louisa's. I feel her hair against my cheek. We are as close as we haven't been in a long time. She seems to be happier just by breathing Cornish air. She was centre of attention the moment the first villager spotted her. It seemed as if the entire population of Portwenn came to welcome her. I don't know why, but she enjoys this sort of thing, maybe even needs it. I will never understand the appeal of it.
Many Portwennians expressed their astonishment that we are still together, but Louisa defended me admirably, even telling them that staying with me has been the best decision of her entire life. Even if I don't give a toss about the opinion of people, I couldn't help but grow a few inches in pride that Louisa stood by me. I am not sure that her statement would have been the same before this weekend. Maybe I wasn't completely wrong.
I remember the first time we sat like this. It was in a hospital. It was the first time Louisa and I were really close. It was then that I hoped that my future could possibly include her. It was then that I couldn't deny my feelings for her any longer. She had sneaked into my dreams before. I can still remember that dream I had when her voice on the answering machine woke me. That dream stayed with me for years, in different variations. These dreams stayed with me until the night after my proposal, when it was replaced by something more precious. A memory.
That night, we saved a boy's life. It was then that I realised that she made me go that extra mile. It was her fear for the boy, her care that made me capable of operating on him without vomiting. Looking back, I should have realised even then that she could be my salvation. Operating on the ruptured spleen I was covered in blood, but I didn't have to throw up once. I felt nauseous, but within controllable limits. I knew I had to do it as soon as she made it clear that she trusted me, she shushed the paramedic and placed the health of this boy into my hands.
Maybe, we did save a boy's life today, too. Maybe we saved our boy's life. I hope he'll have a better life than we had. A better childhood. A more functional family. And maybe, just maybe, we could salvage our own family today.
I'm still resting my head on Louisa's while watching our sleeping son. Right now, life is perfect, and I feel that the gamble I took paid off. I sit there for a while, the rhythmic rattle of the train soothing my soul, or more likely the sweet fragrance of Louisa's hair is doing that, which has again a hint of sea breeze in it.
When I look down to her face, I see her looking up at me. She is not asleep anymore, but I hadn't noticed. I find myself getting lost in those beautiful eyes beaming at me.
"What have you been thinking?" She asks me, and I don't know what to answer.
As I keep quiet, she urges me. "You looked so far away."
Now I know what I want to know.
"Did you mean what you said?"
She blinks, then smiles. "I usually do. But what exactly?"
"Uhum." It's difficult to explain. "What you said, to the villagers…"
Her brow furrows and I can practically watch her thinking.
"I said a lot in the village." She finally states. "It seems I'm a true chatter-box among my…." She pauses.
"Friends." I finish for her. The twinkling in her eyes second my statement.
"I mean…when they…they didn't understand. I mean – us. They…"
"Oh, that's what you mean!" She tilts her head now so that we are not resting against each other anymore. She looks straight at me now. I feel a lump in my throat. I feel her hand sneaking up my shirt, and her mouth comes closer to mine, kissing me slowly and sensually as an answer.
Our son chooses this exact moment to open his eyes and groans "Not again!"
I jump back slightly, almost as if I was found out, guiltily. Louisa, on the other hand laughs out loud. Her hands still fumbling with all sorts of my clothing, she grins towards me.
"Maybe we haven't done it often enough, James." My son is distorting his face, then snuggles back into his seat, sighing "Parents."
To be continued…
