Jasper: Hey girls, missed me? I missed you. Riney's been being very selfish, and as of 3:30 today she's banned from me and all the other TwiBoys. KCLutz4475 said so, apparently she's being punished for something obviously retarted. *shrugs*
Me: *pouts* I told you it was momentary psychosis. I'm fine now. Promise.
Jasper: Right...anyway, she doesn't own us, and at the moment we are very upset at her, but do enjoy this little out-take. Oh, and sexy me will be getting some long overdue loving next chapter. *winks*
Out-take
*Eight months earlier*
"I'm so sick of the two of them," Alice huffed flopping into the chair opposite Emmett.
"Jazz and Bella-Bee?" Emmett asked tearing his eyes away from the television.
They were over at his parents for Sunday lunch.
Alice nodded and crossed her arms, "I swear the two of them are the most stubborn people I've ever known."
"What's up now?" Emmett asked munching on some chips.
"She wants him. I'm almost positive he wants her, and yet the two of them act as though the other is invisible," Alice said with a pout.
"Yeah, he's had it bad for her since that first Thanksgiving I brought her home," Emmett said rubbing his chin.
"We have to do something," Alice said leaning forward, eyes twinkling.
"Like what?" Emmett asked looking at her curiously.
"Gimme a minute," she said and bounded out of the room, to return three minutes later waving a brochure.
"What's this?" he asked as she handed it to him.
"How did you make it through school without being able to read?" Alice deadpanned.
"Ha, ha," Emmett said sarcastically. "Very funny. I can read, and I see it's a brochure for a dating site. How's this going to help them get together?"
"I thought you'd never ask," Alice said clapping gleefully. She spent the next few minutes filling Emmett in on her plan.
"...and that's where you come in," she finished with a broad grin.
"He'll never go for this," Emmett said thoughtfully. "At least not if I suggest it."
"That's the thing, you don't have to," Alice said. "Please try to use your brain here Emmett."
"I'm one minute away from telling you to kiss my ass Pixie," he said with a frown.
"Whatever," Alice said. "You handle him, I'll work on her."
"Cool beans," Emmett said with a grin. His brother really could use the loosening up, and Bella had, had the hots for Jasper since forever.
"One more thing," Alice said and he turned back to her.
"We can't seem to be friends."
Emmett laughed, that was going to be easy. "Alice we barely tolerate each other, I'm sure that's going to be a piece of cake."
"Fine," she said pursing her lips. "I'm going to put the plan in motion next week."
"No way Ally," Bella said shaking her head.
"Bella please, give it a chance," Alice said with a pout.
She and Bella were having one of their ritual, girl's-night-in, slumber parties.
"Alice I am not that desperate," Bella said glaring at her friend.
Alice shrugged, "Who said anything about desperate, this is for fun. And, it's anonymous."
Bella was quiet for a bit, then she said, "And you're sure its safe? I won't pick up any stalkers?"
Alice grinned, knowing she had won her friend over, "Oh Bella, of course it is."
"Fine," Bella grumbled. "I don't even know where to start on a site like that."
Alice hugged Bella with a laugh, "Don't you worry about that, I'll sort out your profile for you."
"Hey bro," Emmett said closing the office door behind him.
Jasper looked up at his brother and smiled, you couldn't help but smile in Emmett's presence. The big bear of a man, always had a grin on his face.
"Hey," he said pushing away the papers in front of him. "What's up dude?"
"Not much, just came to ask you to dinner," Emmett said sitting down.
Jasper cocked a brow at him.
"I'm not into guys Em, and besides we're brothers. That would be incest," he said with a smirk.
"Fuck off Jazz," Emmett said, grin still in place.
"Again, your obsession with seeing me in lewd acts is disturbing," Jasper said grinning. "Shall I tell Mother of your unorthodox past time?"
"Are you gonna come to dinner with me or not?" Emmett asked rolling his eyes.
"I've met the two hottest sisters," he continued.
"I'm not interested," Jasper interrupted.
"Dude, it's been long enough," Emmett said. "Sarah wouldn't want this for you."
"You don't know what Sarah would've wanted," Jasper said slamming his hand on the desk.
"I know she wouldn't want you unhappy," Emmett said softly. He too, had loved his brother's wife. She was the most gentle soul he had ever met.
They were quiet for a few minutes, then Jasper looked at his brother, "Fine. I'll go to dinner with you and the wonderful sisters."
"Great," Emmett said standing. "Oh yeah, I brought in your mail," he said throwing a pile of envelopes on the desk. On the very top, the brochure with the website.
Jasper took up the bundle and looked at the brochure, Emmett hid his grin.
"See you at seven-thirty brother," he said. "And try to look charming."
"Has he joined the site yet?" Alice hissed.
Emmett poured himself some bourbon and resisted the urge to throttle the tiny woman harping at his back.
"Would you chill out?" he asked taking a sip of the amber liquid. He enjoyed the slight burning it gave his throat, and for a moment he forgot all about Alice.
"Emmett!" she cried.
"Jesus Alice, I don't know yet ok?" he snapped.
"Well find out, Bella's been on the site for two weeks already," she said.
"I'll find out later," Emmett snapped. He was getting tired of Alice's pushy behavior.
"Find out now," she snapped back.
"Well you find a way to distract him, so I can log on to his computer," Emmett growled. Mary Alice Brandon was a pain in his ass, he had no idea how Edward put up with her.
Twenty minutes later, he passed by the boardroom and nodded to Alice, who had pulled Jasper into some meeting. She nodded and smiled. Later as they met in the parking lot, Emmett reprised the thoughts of strangling her.
"Did you manage to get the information without leaving too much of a trace?" she asked.
"I am not a fucking retard Alice," he snapped. "Here," he said thrusting a piece of paper in her hand.
"There, you have your information, now good day," Emmett said and got into his car leaving her there.
Alice went home and sent CountryBoy a message from SwanAngel.
The game was on.
A/N: There we have it...the mastermind behind the whole thing. Pixie's are so sneaky *grins*
Laurie Whitlock: I love you! Thanks again for rec'ing my story on The Major's Army ( themajorsarmy. blogspot. ca/) The beach was fabulous. :D
tawelephant: Wonder if he does...more than likely not. LOL
shadow kissed 4eva: Isn't Alice resourceful...lol :D
twilightgirl80: Thanks for the patience...lol
Toxic Angel: Yes, I've noticed the stalking :D I love it !
KCLutz4475: *puppy eyes* Please don't take them away from me *sobs* I fixed it!
hiddenfanggirl16: thanks luv xx and as a Pixie myself...we are awesome :D
jeangary28: Yes, Mike is gone. And yes, we can't keep things like that inside for too long.
psychovampirefreak: How does Alice ever know these things? lol
Kittyinaz: Yes I know that ALL too well :D I hope you both feel better *hugs*
Cevvin: It's Alice #nuffsaid
allie23o: I do too !
butterflykiss69: *high-five*
kawaiigrlmari: Me either :D
DarkHairedBeauty6000: Hey Katherine! :D LOL Yes we can't ever forget Alice, the Pixie Demon strikes again :D
Jaspers Honeybee: LMAO...if u had used the word...I would've keeled over laughing :D
Tatas Bouncealot: *does the Sneaky Pixie dance* :D
Major-Grizzly-Babe: Thank you sweetie ! Welcome to my world :D
Jennii Marie: Thank you, and yes a hottt chapter is coming next.
Mickeyluver33: Sometimes you scare me when you review the exact idea that I have coming up...now who's sneaky? :D
Prillylove25: Yes, Jasper Sandwich it shall be!
Felicia: We shall see...lol thanks sweets xx
serenityalexis: Thanks for the love chicky :D
JoyfulyetHesitantPen: Thankies ^_^
jaspersgirl21: How the hell did you fall off the bed? Pfft...send the bill...sigh...I tell you...smdh
JacobBlackLover2009: Soon my pretty...soon :D
misszayy-5: UPDATED :D muhahahah *us crazy pixies stick together*
AlieshaD: LOL Sorrrrrry :)p
Rand0mnessR0ks: Don't give up yet... :)p *gasp*meanie? Me?! *In Marv from Home Alone 2's voice* NEVER!
4MeJasper: Your sister is way cool lol :)
Twhylitelvr77: It's ok babe, I know how RL gets sometimes. Missed ya tho. Awww poor baby with all that cold, yeah beaches, it kinda has it perks living on a tropical island. LOL thanks for looking out babes ;)
Okay...so I'm off to do some RL shit and then you'll get the next chapter before the night is out :D
See? I'm trying to redeem myself. *kisses* ~ Riney.
