TheRealJacobImprinthide bio
 Author has written 3 stories for Twilight. - Lives In Australia - Sixteen years old (really, really!) - Twi-obsessed, despite the haters. And proud of it. =) CANON/ IC: I am a major tightass (excuse ze french) when it comes to writing and reading fanfics. It must be in character (Execpt of Lemons, I don't mind a mix up there) and something that could have happened. None of that, 'Bella joins a band, meets Edward as a groupie.' shit. That is infuriatingly incorrect. POST BREAKING DAWN: IC stories are a must as pre-stated. But I really do like Steph's interpretation of Bella's life as a vampire. Bella really matured, growing away from the high school sweetheart of a vampire to the fierce, newborn wife and mother. Quite beautiful. RENESMEE/ 'NESSIE' CULLEN: URGH, can I hear you say creepy? That was the one disappointment for BD. Seriously? I could never see Bella as a mother, but -sigh- I guess the character had to revolve somehow. Imprinting with Jacob: Yes, pedophilia is a crime, Mr. Black. We all now what teenage testosterone does to werewolves. Oh and not to mention the danger theory. I mean, hello? A werewolf in love with a toddler? Uh-huh. Right. THE VOLTURI: The Italian vampire 'mafia' always fascinated me in a strange way. I have yet to form a knitting plot line for them in my fiction, but I really do see myself writing about them soon. Demetri will always be my favorite. If you have seen New Moon, you will know what I mean. Charlie Bewely: I'd tap that brit ;-) Also, Jane is uber awesome in my eyes, showing a bit of girl power other than the -cough- skank -cough- Heidi. Woot, woot! Oh, and I'd like to clear up one thing. Hello! What is with these Jane X Alec?? They're brother and sister for Christ's sake. Gosh! (Though, does anyone know if they actually are sibling, or just through their creators??) I also like the idea of Bella joining them -involuntarily, of course. And then Edward comes to the Volturi and sees her. -Shivers- the tension would make for a very good fic. | |||||||
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The Many Deaths of Edward Cullen by Chesty's Superbest Friend reviews
My brother always said that Twilight would be better if Stephanie Meyer had killed off Edward. Would it? Would it really be better? So I have had it arranged that Edward should die in any way possible. Funny ways, stupid ways, gross ways...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 20 - Words: 12,972 - Reviews: 198 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 9/8/2011 - Published: 11/4/2009 - Edward
Risen Anew by Pandora181900 reviews
On Bella Swan's first day at Forks High, she trips over the door step. The smell of her blood is too much for Edward Cullen, and he snaps. Suddenly, she is thrust into a world she didn't even know existed. Jasper/Bella
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 22 - Words: 52,462 - Reviews: 703 - Favs: 1,084 - Follows: 644 - Updated: 5/27/2011 - Published: 10/3/2009 - Jasper, Bella - Complete
Never, Ever, Make an Empath Mad by Jaspers-Darlin-Girl reviews
Jasper wants to write a song for Alices b'day, but when Emmett finds out that Jasper is songwriting, he, Edward and Rosalie tease him about being gay. Way.Too.Much. Now they have to learn a lesson. Never, Ever, make an Empath Mad...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 9 - Words: 10,124 - Reviews: 99 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 4/11/2011 - Published: 10/28/2009 - Jasper
The Courtyard by latessitrice reviews
Bella is in time to save Edward in Volterra, but he doesn't give her chance to explain that they are both alive. Since Edward believes they are in heaven, he takes the opportunity to make the reunion memorable in a way she never dared imagine.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 96,617 - Reviews: 1069 - Favs: 2,137 - Follows: 927 - Updated: 12/12/2010 - Published: 11/28/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Revenge is Sweeter by MyBoyfriendEdwardSparkles reviews
After a very public break up in the school parking lot that involves Bella showing her underwear to the whole school, Edward Cullen and Isabella Swan declare war. Remaining friends with the ex? So not an option...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 23 - Words: 44,935 - Reviews: 1926 - Favs: 648 - Follows: 564 - Updated: 9/22/2010 - Published: 8/26/2009 - Edward, Bella
Twilight Characters visit the set of TWILIGHT! by MyBoyfriendEdwardSparkles reviews
Woah! Why do Bella and Edward have mega-phones? Why is Catherine pulling her hair out? And you know that deer out the start of the movie? Who knew, but he's a DI-VA!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 26 - Words: 13,419 - Reviews: 532 - Favs: 150 - Follows: 79 - Updated: 7/4/2010 - Published: 5/17/2009
True Blood in Us All by JB Rose reviews
One weekend, one TV show that well change Bella's and the whole Cullen's lives for ever. Who said sex couldn't be fun.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 10,929 - Reviews: 122 - Favs: 139 - Follows: 131 - Updated: 2/10/2010 - Published: 11/21/2009 - Bella
Adventures In Forks High by EmotionallyConfuzzled reviews
What will happen when Forks High School get's snowed in? With all of the Cullens in there! They Spend the night? Mike tries to be sexy for Bella? Edward loses control? Will Jasper have fun with emotions? Kareoke? Truth or Dare! One crazy night is ahead.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 12 - Words: 13,749 - Reviews: 709 - Favs: 459 - Follows: 387 - Updated: 12/27/2009 - Published: 4/8/2009
Ithaca is Gorges by giselle-lx reviews
New Moon from Carlisle's and Edward's POV: After the Cullens leave Bella and move to Ithaca, NY, Carlisle fights to keep his family together as Edward's pain threatens to tear them apart. Canon.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 19 - Words: 120,784 - Reviews: 2475 - Favs: 2,113 - Follows: 806 - Updated: 12/7/2009 - Published: 4/12/2009 - Carlisle - Complete
The Meaning of Destiny by my-chemical-romanoff
This is a revised version of How Destiny Began. It tells the story of how young Esme Platt first encounters Dr. Carlisle Cullen and how fate brings them together later on in their lives. Canon.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,425 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 12/6/2009 - Published: 12/5/2009 - Carlisle, Esme
Soap or Death by harlequinsmiles reviews
Edward goes to buy soap for Bella. Silly oneshot. Written for a school project in ninth grade, back when this book was just becoming a fad. *sigh* You sure miss the days when it wasn't all you ever heard about and you could enjoy it in peace.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 800 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/23/2009 - Edward, Jacob - Complete
Edward vs Jacob by crying-is-never-my-talent reviews
to those who are confused between choosing team Edward and team Jacob after watching New Moon...and to those who had switch team to team Jacob after watching new moon....
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,590 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 1 - Published: 11/22/2009
Perfect by Ginnycrazy reviews
This is how New Moon should've ended. Just a short little fanific. MAJOR JACOB AND BELLA.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 599 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/22/2009 - Jacob, Bella - Complete
Jacob is a Sweater by Isolarbell reviews
Jacob takes Bella into the forest to show her a surprise, one that she won't expect. Seth appears, Edward is mean and Jacob is a sweater.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,738 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 4 - Published: 11/20/2009 - Jacob, Bella - Complete
Fire and Ice by Marora18 reviews
One-shot. Bella had to make a difficult decision – she had to pick either Edward or Jacob. But, when she's asleep, she can have them both. Rated M. *devilish smile*
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,344 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 12 - Published: 11/4/2009 - Edward, Jacob - Complete
The 100 Year old Virgin aka Emmett's Advice by BellaFlan reviews
Cut to the bachelor Party scene from Breaking Dawn. Emmett decides it's time to give Edward "The Talk". One shot...just a bit of fun. Rated M for graphic language.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,059 - Reviews: 95 - Favs: 103 - Follows: 26 - Published: 10/31/2009 - Emmett, Edward - Complete
Seeing Things Differently by erikalbryrat reviews
This is how I thought Jared would imprint on Kim. Please review, flames or praise I would just like some feedback. Thank you.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,994 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/11/2009 - Kim, Jared - Complete
Jasper's tale to be told by Chechizme reviews
Years after Breaking Dawn, the gang is back in high school along with a couple additions. During their history class, they learn some interesting facts about Jasper.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,426 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 75 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 10/2/2009 - Published: 9/8/2009 - Jasper, Alice - Complete
Esme's Groove by ssherrill115 reviews
This is my entry in the Esme's Erotic Ecstasy Contest: Hosted by kikiwhore aka kikikinz and coldplaywhore. This is my first story and first lemon. Esme tries her hand at seduction
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,398 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 7 - Published: 9/19/2009 - Esme, Carlisle - Complete
Visions of Love by jennrich2830 reviews
A version of the love story of Alice and Jasper and how they came to the Cullens.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 27 - Words: 69,646 - Reviews: 283 - Favs: 218 - Follows: 80 - Updated: 9/15/2009 - Published: 3/22/2009 - Alice, Jasper - Complete
All The Good Ones by ladeesarah001 reviews
ONE-SHOT - Enduring a boring English class, that she shares with Edward Cullen, a girl contemplates her relationship status: single.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 901 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 3 - Published: 9/8/2009 - Edward - Complete
What? by Monroe5 reviews
Emmett feels like he is completely underappreciated by his family. One shots showcasing his true Emmettness.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,650 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 6 - Published: 8/29/2009 - Emmett
Cullenary Educaton: Forks Sex Ed by MarcyJ reviews
Set at the End of Bella's Junior Year. Hilarity ensues when the Forks Gang is forced to endure Sex Education class with Coach Clapp. Chapter 1 is Jasper POV, and each subsequent chapter is from the perspective of a different character.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 22,726 - Reviews: 2145 - Favs: 3,592 - Follows: 1,671 - Updated: 8/28/2009 - Published: 4/2/2007
Desperation by bella c'ella luna reviews
One-shot, pure smut/lemon. After Jasper almost attacks Bella at her birthday party, he comes to her room to apologize. They try to acclimate Jasper to Bella's scent so that he isn't as affected by her, but their plan goes awry. . .
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,763 - Reviews: 183 - Favs: 554 - Follows: 145 - Published: 8/19/2009 - Bella, Jasper - Complete
Emmett Cullen by LadyAlera reviews
My thoughts on what Emmett does when his family isn't around. Rated T for mild language. Jacob Black poem now added.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Poetry - Chapters: 2 - Words: 313 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 8/6/2009 - Published: 4/1/2009 - Emmett, Rosalie - Complete
Propose by MaryEscapade reviews
Jacob's marriage proposal. One shot.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 377 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/2/2009 - Renesmee C./Nessie, Jacob
No Refill One Moment Until Destiny by TikiTyler9 reviews
One shot. A brief look at Alice's moment before it all changed. One rainy evening in Philly. One purpose. One decision that saved a monster.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,467 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 66 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/28/2009 - Alice, Jasper - Complete
Old Enough by MaryEscapade reviews
Ness is falling in love w/ Jake. One shot fan fic.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 490 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/9/2009 - Renesmee C./Nessie, Jacob - Complete
Forks by avatea reviews
Edward visits Forks with Carlisle some... 16 years before book 1. Short-ish, new concept. Edward's POV! One-Shot.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,803 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 21 - Published: 5/5/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
What IS that smell? by JustOnePogostick reviews
What is that smell and where is it coming from? And why is Esme googling boarding schools? Ah, it must be that time of year again: Summer Vacation. Three glorious months of fewer cloudy days, cabin fever, and much mayhem. Poor Esme.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 4,034 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 5/3/2009 - Published: 4/25/2009 - Emmett
100 Things I Emmett Cullen Am not allowed to do! by The Real Emmett Cullen reviews
NOT ALLOWED TO DO!
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,990 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 20 - Published: 4/28/2009 - Emmett - Complete
Form 1040 by giselle-lx reviews
Because when you're immortal, the only certainty is taxes... While getting some mundane home office work done, Carlisle winds up having a tender moment with his young granddaughter. Set 7 months post BD. One-shot, canon, Carlisle POV.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,871 - Reviews: 196 - Favs: 558 - Follows: 66 - Published: 4/8/2009 - Carlisle, Renesmee C./Nessie - Complete
Oneshot: Stone Mask by Ereana reviews
Bella has lost everyone important to her. She hides behind a mask and shows nobody her emotions. She is now a top member of the Volturi Guard. Will someone break through her stone mask? Non-canon couple Bella X Demetri
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,228 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 139 - Follows: 35 - Published: 4/7/2009 - Bella, Demetri - Complete
Midnight Sun Chapter 13 by woodstock2204 reviews
Picking up where Midnight Sun left off, written in the style of Stephenie Meyer, the first in my series of Midnight Sun chapters.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,829 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 9 - Published: 4/1/2009 - Edward
Welcome to Arizona by Aisling-91 reviews
Edward and Jasper are in Arizona on business, but they take a little time to mix in some pleasure when they visit a strip club. ExJ/ExJxB. Oneshot. AU/OOC. Mature: Smut
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,370 - Reviews: 104 - Favs: 353 - Follows: 78 - Published: 3/13/2009 - Edward, Jasper - Complete
Jacobs Book Of Crappy Blonde Jokes by XxXfluffysexyvampireXxX reviews
Weel, its says it all in the title! rosalie is meant to be the blondes!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 586 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 3 - Published: 2/3/2009 - Jacob, Rosalie - Complete
Christmas On Cougar Island by Lipsmacked reviews
A VerTired of drunken uncles groping you and grandmas asking when you are going to get a man? Then join the Twilight ladies as they discover the joys of Cougar love during their holiday vacation. AU AH, OOC, written by Acireamos, Gustariana and Lipsmacked
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 9,255 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 11 - Published: 12/13/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Letters To Santa by BookwormKali reviews
The golden trio's letters to santa from when they where kids. Takes place when they were about 7 or 8.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 460 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 11/14/2008 - Published: 11/12/2008 - Harry P. - Complete
Alice and Jasper by Rosalie Adrian reviews
AU. Fluffy lemon, Alice x Jasper. Enjoy. JPOV.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 913 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 110 - Follows: 27 - Published: 10/16/2008 - Alice, Jasper - Complete
The Games We Play by Isabel0329 reviews
When Bella plays games with Edward, he takes action to punish her. Rated M for domination, sex and language! AH, All-Human. Extremely OOC. Example for the Dirty Talking Edward Contest.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,552 - Reviews: 164 - Favs: 1,134 - Follows: 236 - Published: 9/23/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Paris by Violet Eliot reviews
Jacob and Bella...What might have happened if Edward hadn't called. Set in New Moon.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,184 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 5 - Published: 9/19/2008 - Bella, Jacob - Complete
Boredom In Biology by whitereflections12 reviews
Set several years post-Breaking Dawn. After you've been through high school several times, biology starts to get really, really boring. And you start looking for other ways to spend the time... EdwardBella, of course.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,130 - Reviews: 182 - Favs: 521 - Follows: 72 - Published: 8/24/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Bella's Going to Kill Me by fanta-faerie reviews
Jake needs permission... Post Breaking Dawn!
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 586 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 8 - Published: 8/14/2008 - Jacob, Renesmee C./Nessie - Complete
Hurricane Season by I'mwiththevampires08 reviews
What happens when the Cullen family decides to go visit Texas and end up stuck in a hotel room for hours because of a hurricane? Drama and comedy ensues. Authored with Whynotjasper. Rated M for a reason folks!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 10,468 - Reviews: 101 - Favs: 133 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 8/13/2008 - Published: 7/28/2008 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .
The Sun Shines Brighter On Snow reviews
When Edward cannot find it in his heart to stay with Bella after returning from Italy, Bella is pulled back down into the pits of despair and darkness. But, now there will be a lifeline to catch her when she falls. A different kind of Jacob/Bella.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 13 - Words: 17,813 - Reviews: 84 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 65 - Updated: 12/28/2009 - Published: 11/21/2009 - Bella, Jacob
Renesmee, That's Not Twister reviews
Jacob & Renesmee spend a nice evening with each other, but see how quickly things go from perfect to *awkward silence* Post BD.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,279 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/30/2009 - Jacob, Renesmee C./Nessie - Complete
Jasper And Esme: A Tale Of A Psycho And His Mother reviews
Okay so not everyone can be perfect. But think of the last Cullen you would expect to be running amuck in red capes and swords. That's right; you guessed it- Jasper Hale, himself.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,478 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 6/28/2009 - Published: 6/25/2009 - Esme, Jasper - Complete