Hi im Megan and as you will read i love almost every book and every movie/ tv show out there. Exept for Jersey Shore but i love making fun of them. Read ahead if your looking to laugh and cry!!!!!

JUST SOME CUTE POEMS I REALLY LIKE!!!

From 10 things i hate about you The Movie...

I hate the way you talk to me,

and the way you cut your hair.

I hate the way you drive my car,

I hate it when you stare.

I hate your big dumb combat boots,

and the way you read my mind.

I hate you so much it makes me sick,

it even makes me rhyme.

I hate the way your always right,

I hate it when you lie.

I hate it when you make me laugh,

even worse when you make me cry.

I hate it when your not around,

and the fact you didn't call.

but mostly i hate the way i don't hate you,

not even close...

not even a little bit...

not even at all.

A bit of fluff between KATRICK!!! (big fan)

This poem is from HOLES The Movie

If only, if only

the woodpecker sighs,

the bark on the tree's

were as soft as the sky's,

as the wolf wait's below,

hungry and lonley

crying to the moon

if only, if only.

I love that poem. I say it everytime someone says "if only..."!!!

Enough with poems hers the Twilight Oath. (I say it all the time)

Twilight Oath

I promise to remember Bella
Each time I carelessly fall down

And I promise to remember Edward
Whenever I'm out of town

I promise to obey traffic laws
For Charlie's sake of course

And I promise to remember Jacob
When my heart fills with remorse

I promise to remember Carlisle
When ever I am in the Emergency Room

And I promise to remember Emmett
Every time there's a huge boom

I promise to to remember Rosalie
Whenever I see something that holds pure beauty

And I promise to remember Alice
When I'm at a mall and a cute outfit spots me

I promise to remember Nessie
When I see that beautiful bronze hair

And I promise to remember Esme
When someone tells me they care

I promise to remember Jasper
Whenever my stomach isn't curled

And I promise to despise the Volturi
When someone speaks of dominating the world

Yes, I promise to remember Twilight
Wherever I may go

So that all may see my obsession
Because I know what the Twilighters know

LOVE IT!!!!!!!!

Ok i have to do this. A sad poem!!! SORRY and WARNING REALLY SAD!!!

My name is sara

I am but three,

My eyes are swollen

I cannot see,

I must be stupid

I must be bad,

What else could have made

My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better

I wish I weren't ugly,

Then maybe my mommy

Would still want to hug me.

I can't speak at all

I can't do a wrong

Or else I'm locked up

All the day long.

When I awake I'm all alone

The house is dark

My folks aren't home

When my mommy does come

I'll try and be nice,

So maybe I'll get just

One whipping tonight.

Don't make a sound!

I just heard a car

My daddy is back

From Charlie's Bar.

I hear him curse

My name he calls

I press myself

Against the wall

I try and hide

From his evil eyes

I'm so afraid now

I'm starting to cry

He finds me weeping

He shouts ugly words,

He says its my fault

That he suffers at work.

He slaps me and hits me

And yells at me more,

I finally get free

And I run for the door.

He's already locked it

And I start to bawl,

He takes me and throws me

Against the hard wall.

I fall to the floor

With my bones nearly broken,

And my daddy continues

With more bad words spoken.

"I'm sorry!", I scream

But its now much too late

His face has been twisted

Into unimaginable hate

The hurt and the pain

Again and again

Oh please God, have mercy!

Oh please let it end!

And he finally stops

And heads for the door,

While I lay there motionless

Sprawled on the floor

My name is Sarah
And I am but three,
Tonight my daddy
Murdered me.

BWAAAAAHHHHHHHH make it stop!!!!! if i got my hold on the dad i would have a baseball bat in my hands. He diserves prison and death!!!!!!!

If you want to find out where i got that poem go to a sad song goes with it

Sorry but here are the lyrics

Dear mr jesus
i just had to write to you
somthing really scared me when i saw it on the news
a story bout a little girl
beaten black and blue
jesus thought i'd send this right to you
dear mr.jesus
i don't understand
why they took her mom and dad away
i know that they don't mean to hit
with wild and angry hands
show them just how big they are i pray

(Chorus)
please don't let them hurt your children
we need love and shelter form the storm
please don't let them hurt your children
won't you keep us safe and warm

dear mr. jesus
they say that she may die
oh i hope the docters stop the pain
i know that you could save her
and take her up to the sky
so she would never have to hurt again

(Chorus)
please don't let them hurt your children
we need love and shelter form the storm
please don't let them hurt your children
won't you keep us safe and warm

dear mr. jesus
please tell me what to do
and please don't tell my daddy
but my mommy hits me too

(Chorus)
please don't let them hurt your children
we need love and shelter form the storm
please don't let them hurt your children
won't you keep us safe and warm

Heres the web site.

Alright put down the tissue and read these Jokes!!!! i am blonde and i am pround of it but i just love this joke because between me and the other blondes we know WE ROCK no matter what!!!!!!!

Q: How can you tell a blonde is having a bad day?

A: Her tampon is behind her ears and she can't find he cigerette!

And this one is from a story on fanfiction of Maximum Ride!!!

'I can picture it now. We're sitting at the table for dinner.

"Max will you pass the salt?" Mom will ask.

"I had sex with Fang!" I blurt out.

Then dylan pulls out the chain saw!'

Its from 'Tough, Sarcastic, and Beautiful' by 'FANGALICIOUS' Thanxs dude i love the quote and love, love, love the story!!!!!!

As you can probibly see i love MAXIMUM RIDE!!!!!! So here are some of my favorite things about MR. p.s. thanxs James Patterson for creating such an awesome series and dont let cathrine hardwicke make a movie. she already screwed up Twilight do you want her to make MR: TAE crappy?!? You're say!!!

Favorite quotes!!!

Book 1: "I feel like pudding, pudding with nerve endings, pudding in great pain." -Iggy (after car crash)

Book 2: "You . . . Are . . . A . . . Fridge . . . With . . . Wings. . . . . We . . . Are . . . Freaking . . . Ballet . . . Dancers." - Fang (punching an eraser with every word)

Book 3: "Fang, Fang, Fang, I love you, I love you sooooo much." -Max (after having chip removed)

Book 4: "Okay guys, I had a couple thoughts I wanted to go over with you." -Max
(pretends to snore loudly) -Iggy
(throws another pinecone at him) -Max
"Quit throwing things at me!" -Iggy
"Glad you could join us." -Max

Book 5: "Forget it! No one's getting married! Not in New Hampshire or anywhere else! Not in a box, not with a fox! Now go to sleep, before I kill you!" -Max to Angel

"That my little mind reading darlin'!" - Max

"Me and my merry band of mutant bird kids" -Max

"Hey whats taking you so long? What are you doing, shaving your mustache?" - Iggy
"I dont have a mustache you idoit, and neither do you. Maybe, in a few years, we can always hope" - Max

Fang: "Man, you weigh a freaking ton. What have you been eating, rocks?"
Max: "Why, is your head missing some?"

Max: “Did you know it wasn’t me, the other Max?”
Fang: “Yeah.”
Max: “When?”
Fang: “Right away.”
Max: “How? We look identical. She even had identical scars and scratches. She was wearing my clothes. How could you tell us apart?
Fang: “She offered to cook breakfast.”

Fang: "Meaning what? We're going to pretend nothing's going on? That's stupid. The only way to deal with any of this is to get it out in the open."
Max: "Have you been watching Oprah again?"

Gazzy: "I vill now destroy de Snickuhs bahs!"

ter Borcht: "Is dere anysing special about you? Anysing vorth saving?"
Fang: "Besides my fashion sense? I play a mean harmonica."

" Am I tough? Am I strong? Am I hard-core? Absolutely.
Did I whimper with pathetic delight when I sank my teeth into my hot fried-chicken sandwich? You betcha."

"I took a bite of the cookie and chewed. 'Hmm,' I said, trying not to spit crumbs. 'Clear with vanilla notes, too-sweet chocolate chips, distinct flavor of brown sugar. A descent cookie, not spectacular. Still, a good hearted cookie, not pretentious.' I turned to Fang. 'What say you?'
'It's fine.'"

"They turned to Angel. "We will call you Little One," the leader said, obviously deciding to dispense with the whole confusing name thing.
"Okay," said Angel agreeably. "I'll call you Guy in a White Lab Coat." He frowned.
"That can be his Indian name," I suggested."

"'And how do you spell that???' the agent asked.
'Captain, like the captain of a ship," the Gasman explained. 'And then Terror, you know, T-E-R-O-R.'

"Angel?" I said. "Baby penguins eat a regurgitated mixture of partially digest fish, krill, and an oily substance from their father's stomachs. Are you willing to eat a bunch of raw fish and krill, then barf it back up into a baby penguin's cute cheeping mouth? Like, every hour?"

"Oh. My. God," Total breathed, stopping dead. He stared up at her as if her were a starving man and she was a Snickers bar. He shook his head. "I know it's daylight, because the sun has started to shine again!" He inhaled deeply. "And the air--the air is suddenly perfumed with--"
"Jet fuel, hot tar, dirty bird kids, and a malamute," I said nudging him forward with my foot.

"I'm brilliant! I'm a genus! I could blow up the whole world!"
I raised my eyebrows
"Not that I want to of course" Gazzy said and gave a little cough.

"I can talk to fish!" Angel said happily, water dripping off her long, skinny body. "Ask one over for dinner," Fang said, joining us.

"You were designed to be very smart, Max,' she told me. 'We electrically stimulated your synaptic nerve endings while your brain was developing.' (The director)
And yet I still can't program my DVD player,' I said."

"Pick a tree. I'll carve our initials into it."

"Iggy: Can I come in?
Max: No! I'm in a towel!
Iggy: I'm blind!"

"Holy [Insert your choice of a swear word here," said Fang"

"You mean other than the wings? I once ate nine snicker bars in a row without barfing. It was a record."

"I don't damsel well. Distress, I can do. Damseling? Not so much."

"Let's just say that if these scientist had been using their brilliance for good instead of evil, cars would run off water vapor and leave fresh compost behind them; no one would be hungry; no one would be ill; all buildings would be earthquake-, bomb-, and flood-proof; and the world's entire economy would have collapsed and been replaced by one based on the value of chocolate. "

"If you're ever feeling a lack of middle-aged white men, just pop into the Capitol. Not so much the House of Representatives, which has a bit more color and texture, but the Senate -- jeez. Yes, let's have more testosterone running the country.

"Uh-huh," I said. "Because all you mad, evil scientists sit around whipping up batches of Pillsbury's finest during your coffee breaks. I mean, this is pathetic."

"And Flock Rule Number Two is, Don't argue with Max or you'll live to regret it." I spun and stomped out to the clearing, turning back for one last jab at Dylan. "And by the way, you clearly DON'T know me better than Fang does. Do you see Fang arguing with me? No, you do not."
Fang rolled his eyes."

"De tall, dark vun- dere's nothing special about him at all," ter Borcht said dismissively of Fang.
Well, he's a snappy dresser," I offered. One side of Fang's mouth quirked."

I love the "baby plane...its going to grow up to be a 747 someday"

"1)Sardonic laughter (always a good one)
2)Rolled eyes and snort of disbelief
3)Sarcastic "youve got to be kidding me"

"Louisiana, the state that road maintence forgot"

"Mad crazy, not mad angry, though a lot of them do seem to have anger managment issues, espeically around me"

"Fair isn't fair, Dean. Like I'm supposed to help you because fair is fair? Try I need you to help me so I wont rip out your spine and beat you with it. I might respond to that, maybe."

"Total you're black" Iggy said.
"I prefer Canine American"

"I take it you don't want me to call your parents."
"Umm, No."
Hello, Lab? May I speak to a test tube please?

And I also laugh really hard with
“Now, let’s say they come and get us.” –Max
“And, like, the halls are full of zebras.”-Ig
“And suddenly tons of bubbles are everywhere.” -Gazzy
“And then everyone starts to eat beef jerky,” -Nudge
“Yeah. I’ll grab a zebra; Gaz, you fill all the bubbles with your trademark scent, so people are choking and gagging: and let’s throw beef jerky right into their eyes! Now, that’s a plan!”

'Buckingham Palace? You know, like where the Queen Lives. And Mr. Queen?'

“Did you know that wasn’t me, the other Max?”
“Yeah.” “When?” “Right away.” “How?”
“She offered to cook breakfast.”

Gazzy:"What does that mean?" (points to sign saying stay off third rail) Fang:" It means the third rail has seven hundred volts of direct current running through it. Tough it and you're human popcorn"

"Hey what happened to your tan?"
"It was Dirt"-Fang and Max

Fang grins, "You looove me. (holds out arms) You love me this much."

"(after discovering that Fang can become invisible)
Gazzy: "I want to do it too!" (sitting mtionless)
Nudge: "Nope, you stand out like a fart in a church."
Max:(muttering)"Appropriately enough"
Iggy: "What about me?" (stands still)
Max: "No, you're visible."
Iggy: "Am not!"
Max: (throws a pinecone at him) "Could I do that if I wouldn't see you?"

"Please, I begged silently, please do not let my last moments on earth be me crammed into a tiny boat in the dark, surrounded by mechanical singing pirates.
Yes, that would be cruel, my Voice said snidely."

"No," my mom replied, trying to keep a straight face. "She's cooking." Quick, alarmed glances were exchanged among the flock. "Cooking...food?" Nudge asked. I heard someone murmer something about ordering a pizza.

I know alot but i love it!!! heres more reasons

Three reasons to love Max! *cough Fang cough*

1. She's headstrong and never gives up. If it weren't for her determination, the world would have been destroyed!

2. She can be caring. She cares about saving the world, but she also takes care of her flock and worries about their safety. She has motherly instincts when it comes to the flock.

3. She's witty and sarcastic. Just about everything she says is full of snark and it makes the book series hilarious.

Max's relationship with Fang

Max and Fang grew up together, literally living in cages next to each other. After they escaped with the flock and went into hiding, Max took the role of leader (possibly because she was a little older), and Fang was her second-in-command.

In the first book, Max starts to show feelings for him, kissing him when she thinks he is dying after his fight with Ari on the beach. Throughout the rest of the books, Max and Fang have a complicated relationship, with Fang wanting to pursue one while Max finds it confusing and wants to stay just friends. It isn't until the last book that Max realizes that they are "soulmates".

More qoutes!!!

"Boy you just can't kill people like you used to," - Fang.

" You're a human-avian hybrid," the first doctor said. (...) "I prefer Avian American."- Max

" How did you become blind, uh, Jeff is it?"
"Yeah, Jeff. Well, I looked directly at the sun, you know, the way they always tell you not to. If only I had listened." - Iggy

"Fnick?" - Iggy