Hi, I'm Riyo-Hikaru, do not call me that, for I am just Riyo. Riyo enjoys summertime rain in a beach house and drinking Peena Coladas...Yeah, not really...:mellow: And considering I'm as original as the "where's the beef?" quote, here are some stats! The stuff no one wants to know- Umm... Hobbies Quotes: “Life is too important to take seriously.”(Corky Siegel) “Nothing you can't spell will ever work.”(Will Rogers) "In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move."(Douglas Adams) "I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown."(Woody Allen) "Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza."(Dave Barry's Bad Habits, Dave Barry) (Calvin): People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world. (Hobbes): Isn't your pants' zipper supposed to be in the front? "Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning."(Rich Cook "I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio."(Rodney Dangerfield) "And that's the world in a nutshell - an appropriate receptacle."(Stan Dunn) "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."(Albert Einstein) "Is being an idiot like being high all the time?" (Janeane Garofalo) "A lady came up to me on the street and pointed at my suede jacket. 'You know a cow was murdered for that jacket?' she sneered. I replied in a psychotic tone, 'I didn't know there were any witnesses. Now I'll have to kill you too.'"(Jake Johansen) "Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat."(John Lehman(US secretary of the Navy) "After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, 'No hablo English.'"(Ronnie Shakes) "I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph."(Shirley Temple) "In answer to the question of why it happened, I offer the modest proposal that our Universe is simply one of those things which happen from time to time."(Edward P. Tryon) "Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first."(Mark Twain) "Suppose you were an idiot...And suppose you were a member of Congress...But I repeat myself."(Mark Twain) "Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted all of the time and have the time of your life."(Tom Waits) "The more you think about things, the weirder they seem. Take this milk. Why do we drink cow milk? Who was the guy who first looked at a cow and said, "I think I'll drink whatever comes out of these things when I squeeze 'em!"?"-Bill Watterson(‘Calvin Hobbes’) "My girlfriend is weird. She asked me, 'If you could know how and when you were going to die, would you want to know?' I said, 'No.' She said, 'Okay, then forget it.'"(Steven Wright) "There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot."(Steven Wright) "How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't live there?"(Steven Wright) "When I was in high school, I got in trouble with my girlfriend's Dad. He said, 'I want my daughter back by 8:15.' I said, 'The middle of August? Cool!'" (Steven Wright) "Why in a country of free speech, are there phone bills?"(Steven Wright) "Did Washington just flash a quarter for his ID?"(Steven Wright) "Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you? But when you take him in a car he sticks his head out the window!"(Steve Bluestone) "You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is."(Ellen DeGeneris) "I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain."(Carol Leifer) "I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, 'I'd like some fries.' The girl at the counter said, 'Would you like some fries with that?'"(Jay Leno "I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets."(Dave Edison) "You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax, tomorrow you'll be afraid to cough."(Pearl Williams) "24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?" "Never comment on a woman's rear end. Never use the words 'large' or 'size' with 'rear end'. Never. Avoid the area altogether. Trust me."(Tim Allen) "Never invoke the gods unless you really want them to appear. It annoys them very much."(G.K. Chesterton) "Never play peekaboo with a child on a long plane trip. There's no end to the game. Finally I grabbed him by the bib and said, 'Look, it's always gonna be me!'"(Rita Rudner" "Never pick a fight with anyone who buys ink by the barrel."(American adage about antagonizing newspaper editors.) "It's like deja vu all over again."(Yogi Berra) "That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it."(A congressional candidate in Texas) "Half this game is ninety percent mental."(Philadelphia Phillies manager Danny Ozark) "Do you know why God withheld the sense of humor from women? So that we may love you instead of laugh at you."(Mrs. Patrick Campbell) "God made man before woman to give him time to think of an answer for her first question."(Anonymous) "Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those I had to kill because they pissed me off."(A pissed off PMSing nun) "What is a committee? A group of the unwilling, picked from the unfit, to do the unnecessary."(Richard Harkness, The New York Times, 1960) "As your attorney, it is my duty to inform you that it is not important that you understand what I'm doing or why you're paying me so much money. What's important is that you continue to do so."(Hunter S. Thompson's Samoan Attorney) "Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so."(Douglas Adams) "Life may have no meaning. Or even worse, it may have a meaning of which I disapprove."(Ashleigh Brilliant) "If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is 'God is crying.' And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is 'probably because of something you did.'"(Jack Handey) "The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that, you've got it made."(Anonymous) "If there's anything more important thatn my ego; I want it found and shot immediately." |
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