Hi! My name is Sarah. I like to write and play basketball. My favorite subject is science and I have a guinea pig named Casey. My favorite color is lime green and I think pluto is a planet!

My friend, the7horcruxes is great author, go read her stories!

Country: US of A

Gender: Girl

Sports: Basketball, Lax

Occupations: Umm...I'm kinda young...

Age: 802

Son\daughter of: People

Favorite word (at the moment): Bombdig

Most used word (at the moment): WHOA!!!!!

Favorite line from a movie: "Wait, who told you, you were adopted!" -Easy A

Something unique: I am secretly afraid of heights

Something I hate: When you just get under the covers in your bed and your mom calls you to do something.

Favorite Action movie: 2012

Songs I like: Not Afraid- Eminem

Favoite animal: Ostriches

Buisness: None

Think of a random phrase. what is it? It tingles your...you know what."- My SS teacher

Get the closest book to you and what is on page 213, 5 lines down? "Danny got dressed in the black suit he wore to his funeral." -Prisoner of Birth

Go on iTunes and pick the first song you see. What is it? Bedrock

Which way are you looking right now, North, south, east or west: I think west

What is the weather? Dark

Rubber ducky or pink platypus? Both!

Think of any Chuck Norris joke, what is it? Chuck Norris can Speak Braille

What is the last thing you watched on TV? Jerseylicious

Without looking, guess what time it is: 6:30

Now look at the clock. What is the actual time? 5:36 (wow)

With the exception of the computer, what can you hear? Music

When did you last step outside? What were you doing? Today, Talking to my grandma

Before you started this survey, what did you look at? meatballs

What are you wearing? PJs

Did you dream last night? yes

When did you last laugh? Today

What is on the walls of the room you are in? Posters

Seen anything weird lately? Yes.

What do you think of this quiz? No comment

What is the last film you saw? I don't know

If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy? Stuff

Tell me something about you that I don't know: I don't know you!

If you could change two things about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would they be? I would kill the annoying people who talk too much.

Do you like to dance? No

George Bush: He is a !@#$%^&*

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.
I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.
I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.
We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.
I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.
I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me.
I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.
I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.
I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male.
I'm the one who can't accept myself.

PLEASE REPOST THIS IF YOU THINK HOMOPHOBIA IS WRONG.

Do your part to end the hate and spread the love!!

A guy wrote this... why do boys fall in love with girls?

1. They will always smell good even if it's just shampoo.

2. The way their heads always find the right spot on our shoulder.

3. How cute they look when they sleep.

4. The ease in which they fit into our arms.

5. The way they kiss you and all of a sudden everything is right in the world.

6. How cute they are when they eat.

7. The way they take hours to get dressed but in the end it makes it all worth while.

8. Because they are always warm even when its minus 30 outside.

9. The way they look good no matter what they wear.

10. The way they fish for compliments even though you both know that you think she's the most beautiful girl on this earth.

11. How cute they are when they argue.

12. The way her hand always finds yours.

13. The way they smile.

14. The way you feel when you see their name on the your cell after you just had a big fight.

15. The way she says "lets not fight anymore" - even though you know that an hour later...

16. The way that they kiss after you have had a fight.

17. The way they kiss you when you say "I love you".

18. Actually...Just the way they kiss you...

19. The way they fall into your arms when they cry.

20. Then the way they apologize for crying over something that silly.

21. The way they hit you and expect it to hurt. i think every girl is guilty of this :)

22. Then the way they apologize when it does hurt (even though we don't admit it).

23. The way they say "I miss you".

24. The way you miss them.

25. The way their tears make you want to change the world so that it doesn't hurt her anymore...

Yet regardless if you love them, hate them, wish they would die or know that you would die without them it matters not. Because once in your life, whatever they were to the world they become everything to you. When you look them in the eyes, traveling to the depths of their souls and you say a million things without trace of a sound, you know that your own life is inevitable consumed within the rhythmic beatings of her very heart. We love them for a million reasons, no paper would do it justice. It is a thing not of the mind but of the heart. A feeling. Only felt. This chain started in 2002. It is a love chain letter. In an hour you are supposed to repost this. Congratulations!! You have been chosen to participate in the LONGEST and the LUCKIEST chain letter on the internet. Once you read this letter, you must IMMEDIATELY (meaning within the hour) post it with the title "why do boys fall in love with girls? " After you send it, make a wish and it will come true...

Choose 10 of your friends:

1. Kathryn

2. Conor

3. Michael

4. Maura

5. Eliza

6. Meghan

7. MJ

8. KTJT

9. Sam

10. Jackie

1) 4 invites 3 and 8 to dinner at their house. What happens?

It would get pretty awkward...

2) 9 tries to get 5 to go to a yoga class. What happens?

Eliza would probably get mad then take a nap...

3) You need to stay at a friend’s house for the night. Do you choose 1 or 6?

1. I know her better

4) 2 and 7 are making out. 10 walks in...Their reaction?

Jackie would start crying and then wash her eyes yelling "ERASE THE MEMORY!!!"

5) 3 falls in love with 6. 8 is jealous. What happens?

hmmmm

6) 4 mugs you in a dark alleyway. Who comes to your rescue? 10, 2 or 7?

MAURA MUGGED ME?????? Conor would probably save me.

7) 1 decides to start a cooking show. 15 minutes later what is happening?

ummm. I am not saying anything.

9) 3 has to marry either 8, 4 or 9. Who do they chose?

Mike would probably choose maura...sorry sam and KTJT!!!!!!!!!

10) 7 kidnaps 2 and demands something from 5 for 2's release. What is it?

Probably Kathryn...he likes her...

11) You get to meet either 1 or 6. Who do you chose?

im confused

12) 10 challenges 4 to a chariot race. Why?

Because Jackie wants to win Conor's love.

13) Everyone gangs up on 3. What happens?

Mike would probably start punching (or crying :) )

14) Everyone is invited to 2 and 10 wedding except for 8. How do they react?

Aww...Conor and Jackie are getting married... KTJT wouldn't care.

15) Why is 6 afraid of 7?

Because he can kill her.

16) 10 gathers everyone around to tell them a fairy tale. How does it go?

Everyone falls asleep and Jackie gets upset.

17) 1 arrives late for 2 and 10's wedding. What happens? And why are they late?

Kathryn probably leave the house late (she ALWAYS does.) Jackie will probably try to kill her for ruining her wedding with Conor.

18) 5 and 9 get roaring drunk and end up at your house. What happens?

Eliza will start stroking Sam and Sam will try to punch her...

19) 3,8,6 and 4 all go to the zoo for 8's birthday party. How does it go? What presents do they get 8?

Mike would probably get KTJT lead. Maura would get him a barnes and noble gift card. Meghan would probably get him money...

20) Everyone gets together and starts protesting something outside of your house. What are they protesting? What do you do?

For me to do my HW.

21) 9 murders 2’s best friend. What does 2 do to get back at them?

Murder's their best friend.

22) 6 and 1 are in mortal danger. Only one of them can survive. Does 6 save himself or 1?

Herself.

24) 5 is trapped in a cave. 10 comes to rescue them. What happens?

Jackie gets lost and can't find the cave.

25) 3 starts a day camp. What happens?

Mike would start yelling at the kids and they would start crying.

26) 4,6, and 7 are doing the Hokey-Pokey. 8 walks in. What happens?

KTJT gets freaked out and runs away.

27) 1 starts to write a story where 9 and 10 are going out. What is 2's reaction?

Conor would probably tell Kathryn to make Sam and Jackie kiss...

28) 7 makes an apple pie. Is it any good?

No...not at all

29) 8 and 5 go camping. For some reason they forget to bring any food. What do they do?

They eat their own limbs...

30) While they are camping, they run into Barney. What do they do?

They start poking him with a stick.

You love hoodies.
You love jeans.
Dogs are better than cats.
It's hilarious when people get hurt.
You've played with/against boys on a team.
Shopping is torture.
Sad movies suck.
You own/ed an X-Box.
Played with Hotwheel cars as a kid.
At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.
You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
You watch sports on TV.
Gory movies are cool.
You go to your dad for advice.
You own like a trillion baseball caps.
You like going to high school football games.
You used to/do collect football/baseball cards.
Baggy pants are cool to wear.
It's kind of weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
Green, black, red, blue or silver are one of your favorite colors.
You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
Sports are fun.
Talk with food in your mouth.
Sleep with your socks on at night.
TOTAL: 26

YOUR GIRL SIDE:
You wear lip gloss/stick.
You love skirts.
Cats are better than dogs.
You love to shop.
You wear eyeliner. (Sometimes)
You wear the color pink.
Go to your mom for advice.
Pink, yellow, orange, purple or gold is one of your favorite colors
You hate wearing the color black.
You like hanging out at the shopping center.
You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
You like wearing jewelry.
Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
You don't like the movie Star Wars.
You were in gymnastics/dance.
It takes you around/ more one hour to shower, get dressed and make-up.
You smile a lot more than you should.
You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.
You care about what you look like.
You like wearing dresses when you can.
You like wearing body perfume.
You love the movies.
Used to play with dolls as little kid.
Like being the star of everything.
TOTAL: 6

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'M RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore.
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that’s how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
Im a VIRGIN so I MUST be a prude
Im STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT so I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroos
I write LEMONS, so I MUST be a twisted pervert.
I wear GLASSES, so I MUST be a dork or nerd
I'm a female BLACK BELT, so I MUST take steroids.
I can't SPELL, so I MUST be retarded

Okay so the bold face ones are what you are ( and these are all stereotypes just to let you know)

101 Things Not To Do At Hogwarts

1. If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that fact and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.

2. I will not sing "We're off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of Oz" when being sent to the Headmaster's office.

3. I will not play poker or bridge with Professor Trelawney's tarot deck.

4. Seamus Finnegan is not "after me Lucky Charms."

5. I will not draw mustaches, glasses, scars, devil horns, or other paraphernalia on the paintings in Hogwarts while the subjects are sleeping. They do not find it amusing.

6. I will not take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter.

-6b. Neither will I take one out on the new DADA teacher.

7. Bringing fortune cookies to Divination class does not count for extra credit.

8. I will not change gravity on the Hogwarts grounds. My fellow students do not need to develop extra muscles and jumping into an orbit is not funny.

9. I am not the Wicked Witch of the West.

-9b. Neither is Professor Umbridge.

10. I will not ask Harry Potter who died and made him boss.

11. I will not follow potion instructions in reverse order "to see what happens."

12. I will not walk up to a Hufflepuff and ask if he/she is going to huff and puff and blow my house down.

13. I will not accept anything edible from a Weasley.

-13b. Especially if it is offered with a compensation for any damages.

14. Hogwarts is not in the flight path of any Muggle airport, and Muggle airplanes cannot crash into Hogwarts. That being the case, there is no need to have first years standing on the spires of Hogwarts waving torches screaming "Go away, go away!"

15. I will not ask for advice from Peeves on how to wreak havoc.

-15b. This goes for Fred and George, too.

16. Making rumors about Harry and Draco's secret love life is not funny and it will stop soon.

17. I will not suggest to Fred and George that they invent and sell Anti-Anti-Cheating Charm quills.

18. I will not tell first years that the best way to study is to stay up all night balancing your textbook on your head, as gravity will cause the information to sink through the skull and into the brain.

-18b. Having not done this, I will not stay up all night to laugh at said first years.

19. I will not point to Harry Potter's scar and ask if his Voldy senses are tingling.

20. I will not organize a Junior Death Eaters Training Camp at Hogwarts. I will not hand out medals for "Hexing Harry Potter," "Endangering a teacher's life by jinxing," or "Throwing a person from the Astronomy Tower." I will not send the latter to Professor Snape and make him an honorary member.

21. I will not add "according to the prophecy" at the end of all my sentences to raise my Divination grade.

22. I will not refer to the Accio charm as "The Force."

23. I will not push Professor Flitwick from his stack of books claiming I need them for my studies.

24. I will not spike my best friend's pumpkin juice and tell him to go hit on Professor McGonagall.

-24b. Or Professor Snape.

25. When asked a question by a teacher I will not inform them that the answer is protected by a Fidelius Charm and I am not the Secret Keeper.

26. I will not hiss at Harry Potter instead of talking.

27. I will not bring a Magic Eight Ball to Divination class.

28. I will not organize a witch burning, even if I have been assigned to do a presentation on Muggle history in my Muggle Studies class.

29. I will not tell Oliver Wood that Quidditch as been permanently canceled.

-29b. Having not done this, I will not tell him that it is Marcus Flint's fault.

30. I will not bewitch Percy Weasley's prefect badges to yell "I'm in love with myself!" every time it senses movement.

31. The Easter Bunny is not Jesus' Animagus form.

32. I will not sign up the Great Lake at Hogwarts for the Summer Olympics swimming competitions.

-32b. I will not take a hippogriff to the Summer Olympics to get an unfair advantage at the Equestrian competitions

33. I will not convince first years that the new password to Gryffindor Tower is "Petrificus Totalus" and must be recited with their wands pointed at themselves.

34. I will not give a "Chosen by whom, actually?" shirt to Harry Potter for Christmas.

35. I will not refer to Aragog as "Charlotte."

36. Crucifixes do not ward off Slytherins.

-36b. I should not test that.

37. I will not jump up and yell "VOLDERMORT, RUN!" in the middle of a D.A. meeting.

38. If Death Eaters attack Hogsmeade, I will not point at the Dark Mark and shout "To the Batmobile, Robin!"

39. I will not tell everyone that Draco Malfoy started the Hug A Muggle Campaign.

40. I will not use magic to change test questions into those I can answer.

41. I will not tell Ronald Weasley that his sister was caught snogging any of the following: 1) Draco Malfoy, 2) Any other Slytherin, 3) Michael Corner, 4) Any other Ravenclaw, 5) Zacharias Smith, 6) Any other Hufflepuff, 7) Neville Longbottom, 8) Any other Gryffindor.

42. Asking Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger "When's the wedding?" is only funny a few times.

43. I will not lock the Gryffindors and Slytherins in a room and take bets on who will come out alive.

44. I will stop asking the Arithmancy teacher what the square root of -1 is.

-44b. And Hermione Granger.

45. I will not dress in long black capes with hoods. Draco Malfoy tried this and almost peed his pants. I must learn from his experience.

46. I will not tell Professor Binns that he is dead and a) needs to move on, or b) get a life.

47. I will not change the speed of light to 30 mph and enjoy watching my fellow students and the teachers find out about the miracles of relativity.

48. I will not start a betting pool on the fate of this year's Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, as it is tasteless and tacky, not a clever money-making concept.

49. I will not hand out shirts that say "Potter 6, Voldemort 0."

50. Astronomy class will not cause me to be abducted by aliens.

51. I will not convince the first years that "Death Eaters" is the name for a cookery club specialized in experimental dishes.

52. I will not start a howler chain-letter saying "Your life will be cursed for seven years if you don't send this to 10 fellow students within 15 minutes."

53. I will not melt if water is poured over me.

-53b. Neither will Professor Umbridge.

54. I will not bewitch my cauldron to change the freezing-point of water. I will not ask Professor Snape why my potion is freezing while the cauldron is heated. Nor will I point out that I doubted from the beginning that he would be able to sort that out for me.

55. I will not tell the first years on the Hogwarts Express that they have free choice of house if they swim over the lake.

56. Professor Flitwick's first name is not Yoda.

57. It is generally accepted that cats and dragons cannot interbreed and I should not attempt to disprove this theory, no matter how wicked the result would be.

58. Sneaking slugs into Ron Weasley's food is not funny.

59. I will not tell Professor Snape that we the student body have been discussing his role in unfortunate events involving the late headmaster and have deemed him a miserable and pathetic excuse of a human being.

-59b. I will also not suggest that he isn't even human.

60. If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for longer than 15 seconds, I am to assume that I am not allowed to do it.

61. I do not know the Avada Kedavra curse, and pretending I do in front of people who annoy me is not funny, no matter how much they injure themselves diving for cover.

62. I will not hang up a sign saying "Reserved for Draco Malfoy" at the girls' bathroom door.

63. I am not allowed to ask pureblood students things like, "If your parents got divorced, would they still be brother and sister?"

64. I will not tell Dobby that Harry Potter's one greatest desire is for a pit bull named Ripper.

65. I will not tell Professor McGonagall about the great Muggle enhancer out there called botox.

-65b. I will not tell her that it would make those thin tight lips of hers into pouty bodacious things.

-65c. I will not tell her that Professor Dumbledore would particularly enjoy looking at those pouty bodacious things.

66. "42" is not the answer to every question on the O.W.L.s.

-66b. Not even if the boy who's whispering this to you tells you he heard it from Hermione Granger herself.

67. I will not set Ravenclaws on the task of calculating the exact value of pi.

68. Getting the Sorting Hat drunk only makes his song funny the first time.

69. Calling the Ghostbusters is a cruel joke to play on the resident ghosts and poltergeists.

70. I will not ask Professor Flitwick how Santa Claus is doing.

71. Asking "How do you keep a Gryffindor in suspense?" and walking away is only funny the first time.

72. I will not ink my owl's feet, have it walk across parchment, and sell the results as cheat sheets for Ancient Runes, even though Crabbe and Goyle keep falling for it.

73. I will not change the speed of sound so that communication by owl is quicker than talking to each other.

74. I will not point out to Professor Sinistra that Astrology needs to be rewritten as Pluto is no longer a planet.

75. I will not encourage bungee jumping from the Astronomy Tower, nor do it myself, as it is disrespectful of Professor Dumbledore's memory.

76. I will not tell Gryffindor first years that sneaking into the Slytherin dormitory is a rite of passage to truly become a Gryffindor.

77. Ravenclaws do not find a sign saying "The library is closed for an indefinite time period" amusing in any sense.

-77b. Neither does Hermione Granger.

78. I will not tell Professor Snape he needs to go to his "Happy Place."

79. If I insist on carrying out my plans of producing "Riddle-De-Dee: The Voldemort Musical," I will do so under a nom-de-plume.

80. I will not tell Professor Trelawney that my teacup says she's lying.

81. I will not imitate Steve Irwin while in Care of Magical Creatures class, even if I have the best fake Australian accent.

82. I will not enchant the telescopes on the Astronomy Tower to display non-existent constellations during O.W.L. exams.

83. My headmaster's name is Albus Dumbledore, not "Gandalf."

84. Underwater broom riding does not distinguish the master from the layman. It is not required to become member of any Quidditch team.

85. I will not use Legilimency to get the right answers from my teachers.

86. I will not use Legilimency to get what my fellow students think are the right answers.

-86b. This also pertains to Hermione Granger.

87. I will not psycho-analyze Professor Trelawney, as it clouds her Inner Eye.

88. "To conquer the earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not an appropriate career choice.

89. I will not put a paper sign on Firenze's back saying "Pony Rides: 3 Sickles."

90. Growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is not "an extra credit project for Herbology."

91. Neil Gaiman is not spying on us.

92. I will not point out to the house-elves how much sushi could be made of the giant squid.

93. I will not suggest that we read coffee beans in Divination instead of tea leaves for a bit of a change.

94. I will not tell the teachers that they cannot assign homework, as we do not actually go home during the school year to do it.

95. The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date for the Yule Ball.

96. I will not make fun of Hufflepuffs because their house colors make them look like bees.

97. I will not use silencing charms on my Prefects.

98. I will not to conjure the words "DRINK ME" onto the vial of any potion in Professor Snape's classroom.

99. I will not add a spoonful of sugar to each potion I make. Mary Poppins was not a brewer of potions.

100. Stealing first-years' clothing and then tossing it into and around the Whomping Willow is highly frowned upon.

-100b. I am also not allowed to tell them that the Whomping Willow is inaccurately named and is actually a wonderful spot for peaceful reading.

101. I will not tell Harry Potter that he is fictional and that everything he has worked for is nothing more than a couple of best selling novels and loads of bad fanfiction.

S.C.H.O.O.L. = Seven Crappy Hours Of Our Life
C.L.A.S.S. = Come Late And Start Sleeping
F.I.N.A.L.S. = Fuck I Never Actually Learned Shit

MOM: I want you in bed by 11:30, ok.
CHILD: Ok mom...
11:31
CHILD: Take that mom, you don't tell me what to do

how much is an Eminem?"
"50 Cent"
"WHAT?! That's Ludacris! Black Eyed Peas are much cheaper. Can i get my Nickleback! I can go get them at my granny's house. She lives 3 Doors Down

when your saying "good game,good game ,good game" but really, all you want to say is " WE WON YOU SUCKKERS!!!!!!"

If you want to see a Quidditch match copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that the HARRY POTTER series are the best books ever- copy and paste this into your profile.

If you absolutely loved Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you're still waiting for your Hogwarts letter, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If someone asks you what you want for your birthday, and you reply, "An owl, so we can keep in touch when I leave for Hogwarts!" copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you agree that Tonks is a way better nickname than Dora (as in Nymphadora), copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are crazy and proud of it copy and paste this onto your profile

If you have sudden mood changes out of nowhere copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever yelled at an inanimate object copy and paste this into your profile

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If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile

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If you are in la la land most of the time copy this into your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

98 percent of teenagers do or have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile

If you have ever tripped up the stairs, copy and paste this into your profile.