If you got a review from me and you don't like it then I suggest that you go to your nearest English teacher or Writing professor and ask them what you are doing wrong. And then correct your mistakes. I do not flame people, that would be rude, but I do give constructive criticism. I'm actually pretty lenient in my reviews, unlike most people Mary Sues don't bother me that much although I will point out any conflicts s/he has with canon and any unrealistic attributes s/he has.

I set up this account because I do not want my stories to get flamed by fangurls or fanboyz who mistake real constructive criticism for a flame. The difference BTW is that constructive criticism is meant to help a writer become better by point out faults in the story, a flame is meant to hurt the writer. Kinda like the difference between the doctor performing life-saving surgery and some random guy in an alley stabbing you. Both actions involve knives and hurt a lot, but one is supposed to help you and the other is supposed to hurt you. Think of me as the doctor. And yes, if you posted your story here then you *did* ask for an honest review. This is a public forum, which means that while you have a right to post what you want, I have have a right to tell you what I think. So there :P

Here are some things in a story that make me happy:

1.Good spelling. Really, this isn’t so hard to do. Most word processors have a spell-check program. Some, such as the Microsoft Word program I am using now, even have a grammar check program. Please use them. Bad spelling and bad grammar make you look like an idiot. It isn’t creative, it is stupid. If you don’t have a spell-check then please use FF.net’s dictionary, or any of the many other free dictionaries or spell checks online. Or just use an ordinary hard-copy dictionary. Using a good beta reader is also a good way to find any flaws in your spelling or grammar.

2.Proper formatting. This isn’t hard, just hit the ENTER key every time you start a new thought or a different character starts talking. It is just one keystroke and it won’t ruin your train of thought. In fact it will become so ingrained that after awhile you won’t even think about it. Note: sometime FF.net hiccups and squishes all of your nice paragraphs into one huge block. Always be sure to use the site’s Preview function before posting your story. If FF.net is squishing your nice neat paragraphs together then keep adding spaces between them until the site stops doing that.

3.No script form. Script form is for plays and movie scripts; it is not for telling a story. While I have read good script form fics, those few were written by people who knew what they were doing and how to write a play. In most cases please use ordinary prose. You will look much more intelligent.

4.No mpreg, unless you are writing about a seahorse. In most cases mpreg (‘male pregnancy’) is not canon. While there are some exceptions, ‘Red Dwarf’ comes to mind, they are few and far between. For the most part mpreg is poorly thought out (how will the baby come out?) and poorly written, as well as being pretty anti-female. As a woman I feel pretty insulted by mpreg. Note for those who don’t know their biology: seahorses are the only animals that have a true male pregnancy.

5.Please don’t use the “its fanFICTION, therefore I can have the characters doing incredibly out of character things because I want them to” excuse to write stuff that trashes the canon. (Note: an AU isn’t necessarily included in this, *if* the author has a good reason for the AU and is able to pull it off.)

I’m sure I’ll find other things to add to this list as time goes one.