Why hello there

I am MadHat. I know a lot of random stuff, and I know more about movies than most people, or so I've been told. I am from the USA. My accent weird and hard to understand, as I've been told, considering I'm from the west coast and on the west coast we don't like to enunciate, but we do like to say a sentence like it's one word. Feel free to pm me for any random reason.

I just saw The Dark Knight Rises. It was arguably the best movie I've ever seen, but it surely now my favorite. Great film.

You can find me at deviantart:

Below are random things that tickled my fancy.

Gay marriage:

1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, liposuction and air conditioning.

2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Brittany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.

9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans...

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...

a couple poems i like.

One bright day in the middle of the night,
Two dead boys got up to fight.
Back to back they faced each other,
Drew their swords and shot each other.
A deaf policeman heard the noise
And ran to save the two dead boys.
And if you don't believe it's true,
Go ask the blind man, he saw it too.

Six humans trapped by happenstance

In black and bitter cold,

Each one possessed a stick of wood,

Or so the story’s told.

The dying fir in need of logs,

The first woman held hers back.

For on the faces around the fire,

She noticed one was black.

The next man looking across the way

Saw not one of his church

And could not bring himself to give

The fire his stick of birch.

The third on sat in tattered clothes;

He gave his coat a hitch.

Why should his log be used

To warm the idle rich?

The rich man just sat back and thought

Of the wealth he had in store

And how to keep what he had earned

From the lazy, shiftless poor.

The black man’s face bespoke revenge

As the fire passed from his sight,

For all he saw in his stick of wood

Was a way to spite the white.

And the last man of this forlorn group

Did not expect to gain;

Giving only to those who gave

Was how he played his game.

The logs held tight in death’s still hands

Was proof of human sin.

They didn’t die from the cold without,

They died from the cold within.

Quotes:

Randoms

"I used to look up to Tiger woods because he was a champion. After the sex scandal, the man is a god!" -Aziz Ansari

"President Clinton signed a 10 million deal to write a book by 2003. Isn't that amazing? Yes, and get this, not only that, President Bush signed a 10 million deal to read a book by 2003." -Conan O'Brian

“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.” -Dr. Seuss

Books

"How many lost souls do You need, Lord, to satisfy your hunger? God, in his infinite silence, looked at him without blinking." - Carlos Ruiz Zafon, The Shadow of the Wind

“Destiny is usually just around the corner. Like a thief, a hooker, or a lottery vendor: its three most common personifications. But what destiny does not do is home visit. You have to go for it." - Carlos Ruiz Zafon, The Shadow of the Wind

My Writing Style

Most of what I write is quite dark, but I've been told it can be pretty funny. I'll never post my best works because a) most involve characters featured in one of the books I'm working on b) I don't want anything being copied.

With everything I write I have to put myself into it somewhere. Whether a character has my similar personality or interests, or the setting takes place in my home town or something.

If I don't write fantasy it pretty much just turns into a rant. I put my beliefs into everything, and I have to use fantasy and scifi to keep it all tame.

Things that anger me

I don't really like thinking about this, but the great John Williams was born in 1932. And when he dies we'll be stuck with Danny Elfman. Could you imagine a world where every movie has the same score? Because I can, and it's not pretty. At least we'll still have Hans Zimmerman...

Humans. We suck.

Fake people. They're annoying.

Tim Burton's Batman Returns. Cat woman is cool, but the penguin is DISGUSTING. I mean really? Black slime coming out of his mouth at all times? And they wonder why they didn't sell happy meals. And on top of that, Bruce Wayne is brooding (that's okay) and sits in the dark waiting for the bat signal at all times. Don't you think it's a bit suspicious having giant mirrors on your house that point the bat signal directly into your house? All of that would be excusable if it weren't for the fact that he's such a WHINY BITCH. I wanted to punch him in the face the entire movie.

Titanic. That movie by James Cameron. I HATE it. Don't get me wrong, i have to admit it's a decent movie, but Leonardo DeCaprio kind of sucks in it. Actually, the whole damn plot sucks. We follow a friggin love story? Really? On a boat that's sinking. Fascinating. I'd would've liked to see more of the ACTUAL STORY OF THE TITANIC rather than a dumbass poorly put together i've-totally-seen-this-before love story. And then it went and won best picture. And the movie that should have won, Amastad, it wasn't even nominated. You know what, James Cameron just pisses me off in general. When he won the golden globe for directing Avatar (don't even get me started) he gave his acceptance speech in Navi. WHAT A DOUCHE.

current projects:

Maximum Ride and House of Night Crossover. The sequel. it's a work in progress I guess...I really want it to be a lot better than the first one since I've grown as a write since I last posted. Not to mention since I first posted.

Teen titans story. I like it a lot, actually. A few OCs, it's totally my favorite story (that I've posted) so far.

A book. Yes, I'm writing a(few) book(s), so UPDATES WILL BE SLOW.