General Disclaimer~

So that I don't have to put a disclaimer on each and every chapter of each and every story, I shall make this a general disclaimer: any aspects of my stories recognizable from some form of media in all likelyhood belong to that/those recognizable source(s).

'Bout me~

High school bookworm, introvert, would-be environmentalist, worshiper of sarcasm. Fantasy and Fanfic addict. If it can be said that I have any obsession, as all my friends do, it would have to be books. So talk to me.

Funneh Stuff~

When delivering a campeign speach, Theodore Roosevelt was interrupted by a critic, who shouted: "I'm a Democrat!" Roosevelt quietted the crowd and spoke: "May I ask the gentleman, why he is a Democrat?"

"My grandfather was a Democrat," replied the man, "my father was a Democrat, and I am a Democrat."

"My friend," Roosevelt interjected, "suppose your grandfather had been a jackass and your father was a jackass. What would you then be?"

The critic replied, "A Republican!"

(No offense to Republicans, I just thought that was funny.)

"If 'con-' is the opposite of 'pro-', is Congress the opposite of Progress?" ~Anonymous.

"Haven't I seen you somewhere before?"

"Yea, that's why I don't go there."

"I'd like to call you. What's your number?"

"It's in the phone book."

"But I don't know your name!"

"That's in the phonebook too."

"I would go to the end of the world for you!"

"Yes, but would you stay there?"

"If there's anything you want, don't hesitate to ask."

"I want you to shut the door from the outside."

"... Let's pretend I'm not purple, and I'm not a toaster." ~My best friend, Hope, on Furcadia.

"'Cake or Death?' 'Um, cake please.' 'Here ya go. Cake or death?' 'Cake please!' 'Cake or death?' 'Death please-- no wait! Cake! I meant cake!'"~ Eddie Izzard

"'I claim India for Britain!' 'Y'can't claim us! We live here! All five hundred million of us!' '... Do you have a flag?' 'No... But that's not the point!' 'Too bad, no flag no country! Those're the rules! ... That I just made up.'" ~Eddie Izzard.

Warnings:

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (But neck is okay. ;D)

On a small tractor: "Danger: Avoid Death"

Gay marriage:
1) Being gay is not natural. People always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, liposuction and air conditioning.

2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Briteny Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.

9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans... --

Re-post this if you believe in legalizing gay marriage