You know your addicted to NCIS when...

1) You've yelled hysterically at anyone who bothers you on Tuesday nights, episode premier night

2) You've used two or more "Ziva-isms"

3) You've begun to use marine phrases

4) You repeat Rule 23 to anyone who touches your coffee

5) You are desperately searching for Caf-Pow!

6) You've accidentally tried to use your TV as an MTAC screen

7) You find yourself absentmindedly humming the theme song

8) You're up at four in the morning reading NCIS fanfics

9) You find yourself Gibbs Headslapping people (and yourself)

10) You've tried to watch the movies that Tony talks about.

11) Your dog goes missing and you say "Put out a BOLO."

12) You've never, ever, EVER broken rule 12.

13) You ALWAYS break rule 12. :)

14) You've threatened to kill someone with a paperclip

15) You were hysterically screaming "NO!" at the top of your lungs during ep "A Desperate Man" at the TV screen when Ray proposed to Ziva.

16) You use McNicknames on people

17) You've caught yourself daydreaming about running alongside Tony and Ziva, yelling "NCIS! Drop your weapon!!"

18) Your video game username is "Elf Lord"

19) You've tried making your hair like Ziva's (and, like me have failed drastically)

20) You copy and paste this into your profile.

Things I am not allowed to do at NCIS:

1) I am not allowed to launch paper balls at Tony and say "I'm practicing sniping."

2) I will not yell "HINKY!" repeatedly during work hours.

3) I will not sneak up behind people, scare them, and then claim "I'm Gibbs!"

4) I will not threaten to kill people with a paperclip

5) Gloves are for collecting evidence; not to be used as balloons.

6) I will stop saying "Get a room!" whenever Tony and Ziva are arguing.

7) I am not allowed to discuss my theory of how Gibbs is related to the Men In Black.

8) I will not hide Bert behind McGee's desk and say "McGee, there's a bathroom RIGHT THERE."

9) I will not refer to Ducky as "Donald Duck"

10) I will not dress up as Gibbs for Halloween

11) I will not ask McGee how many wedgies a day, on average, would he get when he was a kid.

12) I will not call people "snitches."

13) -Or a certain word that rhymes.

14) I will not yell "PARIS!" repeatedly when Tony and Ziva are within two feet of each other.

15) I will not refer to Ziva as "Mossad Hunting Dog."

16) -Especially around Ziva

17) I will not bring a water gun to work and tell everyone it is real, then pretend to shoot them with it.

18) I am not allowed to date coworkers (yeah, sure. That's gonna last.)

19) I am not allowed to headslap random people because they are not following Gibbs Rules.

20) I am not allowed to tell Probies that the first test on the job is to let a blind-folded Gibbs shoot an apple off your head.

21) I am not allowed to ask Ziva how stupid she thought Ray's haircut was.

22) I am not allowed to prank call Gibbs, claiming I sell sniper guns.

23) I am not allowed to call Tony "My little hairy butt."

24) I am not allowed to call Ziva "Sweetcheeks"

25) I am not allowed to impersonate Bert at lunch

26) I am not to replace Gibbs' coffee with Abby's Caf-Pow!

27) I am not to replace Abby's Caf Pow! with Gibbs' coffee.

28) Probies are not to be used as "Moving Target Practice"

29) I am not allowed to hide in a body bag in Autopsy, then scare the hell out of Jimmy Palmer if and when he opens it.

30) I am not allowed to sing my own theme music during stakeouts

31) I'm not allowed to replace the ballistics guns with water guns

32) I'm not allowed to tell Gibbs about "paintball sniping"

33) I am not allowed to give McGee a poison ivy plant for Christmas.

34) I am not allowed to put superglue on McGee's keyboard

35) I am not allowed to ask Gibbs "Is that a conspiracy?" every time he says something.

36) I am not allowed to come to work wearing a shirt that says TIVA FOREVA!!

37) -For my own health and safety

38) I am not allowed to blow a bugle whenever Gibbs walks into the bullpen

39) I am not allowed to ask Gibbs if his "Gibbsy" senses are tingling.