Vanity-Is-Insanity.XX
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Poll: Do I write well for my age? I'm 13. Vote Now!
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Joined 08-06-10, id: 2483751, Profile Updated: 06-19-11
Author has written 2 stories for NANA, and Naruto.

Blowpops and blood-trails. [They are my life...]


Liebe ist für alle da.


I don't want to change the world . . . I just want to leave it colder.

Call me Nana.


((Yeah, I know . . . they're all jealous of my MAD RAD HAIR!))


He ate my heart, then he ate my brain!

To the boy that exhausts me to no end: I'm sorry.

We can just pretend~


You know what?? I think you're jealous of my sexy hair. I know it's fucking MAD-- I'm well-aware that it is insanely RAD. So don't be angry when your man is falling for me, mmmkay, sweetheart?


. . . I've lost all inspiration for fanfiction. I'm currently writing a mini-novel called Beauty Killer, [Jeffree Star!] and I suppose I just don't have time; however, I assure you all that I have improved vastly since I left . . . and I'm sure I'll be back soon!

Mood: I broke up with him the first time. We got back together. He broke up with me. FUCK MY LIFE.

Song: You're All I Need--Motley Crue.

When you tooky lips, I took your breath. Sometimes love's better off dead.


Anime/manga I have watched/read or am in the misdt of watching/reading:

Fushigi Yuugi, One Piece, Naruto, Death Note, Hikaru No Go, NANA, Shugo Chara, Crossroad, Fruits Basket, Negima?!, Mar, Tokyo Mew Mew, Bleach, Ouran High School Host Club, Elfen Lied, The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya, Sailor Moon, Ghost in the Shell, InuYasha, Kekkaishi, Fullmetal Alchemist, Code Geass, XXX-Holic, RomeoXJuliet, Devil May Cry, Spice and Wolf, Nabari no Ou (I LOVE Miharu!) (More to come!)


Time for the personal shizz:

Name: Nana.

Gender: Neither. Mmmkay, I'm a girl.

Age: 14 years young, sadly enough.

Appearance: While most will say I look just like Lady Gaga, I disagree. I cut my hair short; it falls near my collarbone, and have thick, blunt bangs. Blue eyes; 5'2, 86lbs. That's it. :) Oh, and I wear a lot of eyeliner. And hairbows. Yepp.

Likes: t.A.T.u, Gaga . . . snow days, writing to Lulu, Naruto, yaoi, yuri, Pein, track, music . . . being alone, silent nights . . . BLOOD ON THE MOTHERFUCKING DANCE FLOOR.

Dislikes: Many things, including you.

Religion: Peinism.

Relationship Status: Single, but married to my best friend

This Week's Quote: Fuck it & forget it.


You may have noticed I've taken most of my stories down . . . well, that's because I've matured and improved since then. I think I need a fresh start.


Random Quotes:

L- Wait, he's coming inside!

N- Dude . . . shouldn't he know by now not to come inside? That's how accidents happen...

L- Nana!

N- -shrugs-

-o-o-o-

A- That's easy.

N- Your mom is easy.

A- D:

-o-o-o-

N- So . . . I'm outside in the snow with no jacket and a hamster in my shirt... (Talking to a camera)

L- Oh . . . Oh, Nana--

N- It's so uncomfortable!

-o-o-o-

K- He needs to penetrate the nucleous with something solid! Hehehe... in bed!

N- Which is why children like us shouldn't be allowed to watch Cartoon Network. XD

-o-o-o-

D- 's up, Cunt?

N- Urgh! You little dick, I DO NOT resemble a woman's reproductive organ!

C- Nana! D: Calm down!

N- No! I'll just fuckin' kick him in the--mmmph!

C- -cover's my mouth-

D- Ooh, baby! She's okay!

N- -blinks before pulling her hand away- Did you just finish my sentence by quoting Sugar?

D- Well, you did just genderbend part of the--

N- I fuckin' love you. -extends hand- Friends?

D- -blinks- You're one epic ho, bitch. Friends. -fist bump-

(This kid brings out my bad side. XD What can I say?)


I can feel her all around me.


Damn, gurl!

lolwhut? I don't know... I'm listening to whatever music is on this SuiSaku video. -swoons- Suigetsu is so delicious!


It's hard being a diamond in a rhinestone world.


Curse you strawberry and your pink deceiving wrapper!

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Uneasy coexistence by DeGlace reviews
One grinning shark–man. One pink–haired medic. Ankles. Teeth. Kisame x Sakura. Yes, you read that right.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 70,111 - Reviews: 1227 - Favs: 2,266 - Follows: 1,365 - Updated: 12/23/2015 - Published: 7/9/2006 - [Kisame H., Sakura H.] - Complete
Selecting Team Gai by Sincerely C reviews
Hiruto has entered the Leaf Village and has become a part of it. But what of his past master? And what about the new one he loves? Yaoi NejixOC GaaraxOC References
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 16,007 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 3/11/2013 - Published: 9/9/2010 - Neji H.
Drops of Mercury by sarsaparillia reviews
Or, that time two rich kids tried running away together and accidentally fell in love. — Sasuke/Sakura; 46/5o.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 46 - Words: 95,293 - Reviews: 1085 - Favs: 389 - Follows: 235 - Updated: 11/28/2012 - Published: 11/4/2009 - Sakura H., Sasuke U.
Sakura's Experiance in Boot camp by Poolday reviews
Ok, so I'm stuck with freaks that might have visted Juvi more then me. What should I do? What else? Prank 'em.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 26 - Words: 41,465 - Reviews: 378 - Favs: 256 - Follows: 147 - Updated: 6/4/2012 - Published: 12/29/2009 - Sakura H., Akatsuki - Complete
If I Knew Then by brezoflower reviews
SasuSaku, NaruSaku Everyone is dead, including Sasuke. Eighteen and about to kill herself, Sakura is overwhelmed by the Kyuubi's chakra. When she wakes up, she is twelve again, and has the chance to change...everything. Well, she knows where she's starting first.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 3 - Words: 16,844 - Reviews: 746 - Favs: 888 - Follows: 1,012 - Updated: 3/8/2012 - Published: 12/14/2006 - Sasuke U., Sakura H.
Laying Claim by JanuaryEclipses reviews
SasuSaku. An ancient law in Konoha permits people from prominent clans to buy people who aren't from clans at all. Unfortunately, Sakura just refused to believe it until her mentor confirmed that, yes, she was now owned by Uchiha Sasuke.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 18 - Words: 90,610 - Reviews: 3467 - Favs: 5,177 - Follows: 2,804 - Updated: 3/3/2012 - Published: 8/29/2006 - Sakura H., Sasuke U. - Complete
Scrumdidileeumptious by BitterSweetCrimson reviews
[SakuxAkatsuki AU] She was a freshman and they were juniors but when insanity became reality, love and lust mix strangely, and life starts falling apart, lines typically get blurry. New philosophy: Don't look back. Kick some ass. And get the guy... guys* [Rated for language only. Currently updating all chapters, will complete]
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 53 - Words: 194,970 - Reviews: 3023 - Favs: 1,064 - Follows: 813 - Updated: 7/9/2011 - Published: 11/3/2008 - Sakura H., Akatsuki
Let's do the Twist by N Harmonic reviews
In order to celebrate the four years they had together; Page ask Konan and Tobi to help her set up a family game of Twister. see what happened and who wins. also PLEASE READD AND REVIEW
Naruto - Rated: K - English - Family/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 880 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 4 - Published: 6/5/2011 - Akatsuki - Complete
Dango is Sweet by N Harmonic reviews
oneshot Random story on Itachi and Kisame; friendship only no romance. The dango recipe is real and they are sweet. PLease read and review
Naruto - Rated: K - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 471 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/5/2011 - Kisame H., Itachi U. - Complete
After the Fall by Insane Romantic reviews
When Sakura dies, the last thing she expects to do is to wake up again... eight years in the past.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 5 - Words: 17,789 - Reviews: 376 - Favs: 703 - Follows: 983 - Updated: 3/4/2011 - Published: 3/7/2010 - Sakura H., Sasuke U.
Blind by ObsidianSickle reviews
-SasuSaku- -Complete- It was almost time, Orochimaru was going to take his body as a vessel. He hated being used...he refused to be used. With that thought, he took the kunai in his hand and slashed across his eyes.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 73 - Words: 530,880 - Reviews: 8530 - Favs: 5,545 - Follows: 2,151 - Updated: 10/28/2010 - Published: 1/31/2007 - Sasuke U., Sakura H. - Complete
oppa! oppa! oppa! by rawrchelle reviews
Sasuke/Sakura. AU. From the outside, Uchiha Sasuke looks like the stereotypical boy that needs counseling. On the inside, he's actually a softie that likes Korean girl bands.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,787 - Reviews: 105 - Favs: 390 - Follows: 51 - Published: 9/20/2010 - Sasuke U., Sakura H. - Complete
Neighbors by Remi16 reviews
AU. When Sasuke's car broke down, he asked his neighbor Sakura for a lift to school. Little did both of them know that the ride would be the beginning of something great. SxS
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 34 - Words: 93,032 - Reviews: 293 - Favs: 355 - Follows: 164 - Updated: 8/24/2010 - Published: 2/7/2010 - Sakura H., Sasuke U. - Complete
Take It or Leave It by kc-archive reviews
Akatsuki & Sakura. After a moment of shock, Sakura realized that two fully grown, fully naked men were sitting squished uncomfortably together in her bathtub.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 79,648 - Reviews: 2522 - Favs: 3,189 - Follows: 1,840 - Updated: 8/8/2010 - Published: 6/21/2007 - Akatsuki, Sakura H. - Complete
Misunderstanding In A Hotel Reservation by DeepPoeticGirl reviews
/SasuSaku/ A misunderstanding led to complications. Sasuke Uchiha could not handle complications right now. Not between them. But there was no way in hell that he was going to sleep on the floor.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,602 - Reviews: 91 - Favs: 516 - Follows: 61 - Published: 8/6/2010 - [Sasuke U., Sakura H.] - Complete
Hinata's Got It Going On! by RainingSprinklesDownMyThroat reviews
Hinata felt rejection's sting in middleschool and vowed to change for the better! Now in highschool she's dressed to impress, but she still feels like the timid little girl in a puffy jacket. Will her new friends help her become confident? HinaX?Akatsuki
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 15 - Words: 58,657 - Reviews: 360 - Favs: 286 - Follows: 221 - Updated: 8/4/2010 - Published: 7/27/2009 - Hinata H., Akatsuki
ChickenAss by eryv reviews
The great Uchiha Sasuke, sulking? It can't be! No- wait. Sasuke, are you POUTING? Oneshot. Slight SasuSaku, not enough to make you implode. Pokes fun at Sasuke, kukuku. Now a two-shot.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,043 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 7/23/2010 - Published: 6/20/2009 - Sasuke U., Sakura H. - Complete
mad love by ohwhatsherface reviews
AU. SasuSaku. Sakura kissed a girl and she liked it. Maybe. She's not too sure. And she really hopes Sasuke won't mind it.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,881 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 301 - Follows: 38 - Published: 6/24/2010 - Sakura H., Sasuke U. - Complete
La Réflexion by angelforshow reviews
AU. Tenten stares into the mirror and she doesn't really know what she sees in herself anymore.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,405 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/8/2010 - Tenten - Complete
mouse & rice by rawrchelle reviews
Sasuke/Sakura. AU. "What do you think love is, Sasuke-kun?" "How would I know?" "I think love is being with someone when they die." "That's morbid." "I know. Love is hearing that last, shuddering gasp escaping their lips, like a final wisp of smoke."
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,451 - Reviews: 158 - Favs: 456 - Follows: 55 - Published: 6/3/2010 - Sasuke U., Sakura H. - Complete
HIDAN: Your Owner's Guide by Prnkstr4Lfe reviews
You've always wanted a HIDAN, and now you have it! Please remember to read all instructions before attempting to control your HIDAN.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,409 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 3 - Published: 5/29/2010 - Hidan - Complete
Confessions On A Bathroom Stall by TheDominoEffect reviews
“Oh, if it isn’t Thunder Thighs.” Sakura supposed she could thank the name calling and Ino, the rumors, for leading them to the bathroom stall and the graffiti that would change the world as they knew it. —SasukeSakura. AU.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 3 - Words: 14,975 - Reviews: 106 - Favs: 130 - Follows: 160 - Updated: 5/23/2010 - Published: 1/30/2010 - Sakura H., Sasuke U.
little green frogs by rawrchelle reviews
Itachi/Sakura. AU. Happiness is difficult to acquire, but it won't run from you. You just have to find it. Of dreams, wishes, and blindingly searching for what's already in front of you.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,349 - Reviews: 78 - Favs: 329 - Follows: 37 - Published: 5/9/2010 - Itachi U., Sakura H. - Complete
switching sides by ohwhatsherface reviews
Sakura is done with boys and her teammates... well, they don't quite understand.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 756 - Reviews: 254 - Favs: 692 - Follows: 85 - Published: 4/2/2010 - Sakura H., Sasuke U. - Complete
Black Cloaks, Red Clouds, Purple Nail Polish by Kohana Kurama reviews
Tobi looks at Kisame and asks "Kisame will you butter my muffin?" Velveeta cheese is dangerous. Deidara sings pop and rap music. The Akatsuki at their best. Rated for coarse language
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 11 - Words: 17,731 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 3/17/2010 - Published: 12/10/2007 - Akatsuki
Of Colors, Birthdays and Proposals by land law is for losers reviews
For Uchiha Itachi, life is made of black, white, and red. For Haruno Sakura, life is a bubble of colors. “It doesn’t matter if you lack creativeness. It’s just about the way you see the world.” Non-massacre.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 948 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 8 - Published: 1/29/2010 - Itachi U., Sakura H. - Complete
DEIDARA: The Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual by Diamond Mask reviews
Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of a DEIDARA! To maximise the benefits and enjoyment of your unit, read the following guide carefully and learn to love and care for your very own Iwa Bomber!
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,779 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 124 - Follows: 15 - Published: 1/15/2010 - Deidara - Complete
we'll be a dream by rawrchelle reviews
Sasuke/Sakura. AU. Contrary to popular belief, Sasuke does have love to express. He just doesn’t do it in ways you’d expect, and he doesn’t do it to you. Sasuke and Sakura, from start to finish, and maybe a little beyond that.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,922 - Reviews: 163 - Favs: 274 - Follows: 40 - Published: 1/10/2010 - Sasuke U., Sakura H. - Complete
iLondon by Riz-I reviews
“The ‘Idiots Guide To London’ says if we go through there, we’ll get ‘mugged’.” “You mean... they’ll throw mugs at us?” “I think so.” Because eloping to London with a brain surgeon as his best man was never going to work. Collab with Colored-Chrome
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,483 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 12/29/2009 - Published: 12/24/2009
fast forward by rawrchelle reviews
Sasuke/Sakura. Of rewinds and restarts. “Hi, I’m Sakura. Merry Christmas. I love you.”
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,216 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 231 - Follows: 27 - Published: 12/25/2009 - Sasuke U., Sakura H. - Complete
Happy by an1m3.l0v3rs.gr4sp reviews
Chouji POV. Ino ends up pregnant after an undercover mission, and Shikamaru doesn’t let her leave him. He protects her, and shows his love not only to her, but everyone.Ino/Shika One Shot.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,423 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 9 - Published: 12/21/2009 - Ino Y., Shikamaru N. - Complete
Credo by rawrchelle reviews
Itachi/Sakura. Why is it that the more I tell myself to raise my defenses, the more they fall, and the faster I fall with them?
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,438 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 85 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 9/15/2009 - Published: 12/20/2008 - Itachi U., Sakura H. - Complete
weightless by rawrchelle reviews
Neji/Sakura. AU. “It’s a good luck charm.” “Good luck charm?” “You’re obviously going to need it if you go through those rapist-infested subway stations every morning.” “I’m…touched.”
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,940 - Reviews: 92 - Favs: 438 - Follows: 53 - Published: 8/21/2009 - Neji H., Sakura H. - Complete
Little Messages by MysticFirefly reviews
Sakura has to endure a horrible fate: summer school. Writing on a desk may prevent boredom but who expects anyone to write back?
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 12 - Words: 38,755 - Reviews: 1497 - Favs: 1,674 - Follows: 878 - Updated: 8/12/2009 - Published: 8/14/2006 - Sakura H., Sasuke U. - Complete
Shattered by WastingWishes reviews
Everything they had and once knew is now shattered. It broke to million little pieces; one that cannot be fixed .SasuSaku
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,190 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 4 - Published: 7/28/2009 - Sakura H., Sasuke U. - Complete
raindrops falling up by rawrchelle reviews
Sasuke/Sakura. “It can’t be anyone but Sakura.” “Why?” “Because she’s the only one stupid enough to love me despite everything.”
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,347 - Reviews: 131 - Favs: 683 - Follows: 88 - Published: 7/20/2009 - Sasuke U., Sakura H. - Complete
Home by rawrchelle reviews
Sasuke/Sakura. AU. How does your hair stick up like that? Do you notice my mismatched socks? Why are you so amazing? After all of these years, why don’t you see me the way I see you—as a place I can always return to?
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,708 - Reviews: 97 - Favs: 599 - Follows: 69 - Published: 7/14/2009 - Sasuke U., Sakura H. - Complete
Our Red Lamp by jeonhwa reviews
Dear Diary… To My Diary… No. Maybe I’ll just stick to writing the date. Anyway, today I moved into my apartment, crossing off another New Year’s resolution. And I regret it already; the neighbors here are just so rude! /AU: SasuHina/
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,146 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 29 - Published: 7/9/2009 - Sasuke U., Hinata H.
The Anatomy of Melancholy by A Philosopher with a Pen reviews
A more dramatic take on the origin of "The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya." The event that happened three years ago is revealed, and how Haruhi came to be a God becomes the driving force behind her melancholy.
Haruhi Suzumiya series - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,367 - Reviews: 115 - Favs: 404 - Follows: 67 - Published: 7/2/2009 - Haruhi S., Kyon - Complete
Before The Dawn by Lady Silvamord reviews
Fifteen-year-old Sakura never expected to become a traitor to her village, but in a Konoha ruled by Danzou, she has no other choice. Finding her path entangling with the village's most infamous renegade, though, was another story entirely. ItaSaku AU.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 21 - Words: 250,455 - Reviews: 1980 - Favs: 2,629 - Follows: 798 - Updated: 6/28/2009 - Published: 1/10/2009 - Itachi U., Sakura H. - Complete
what i go to school for by ohwhatsherface reviews
AU. SasuSaku. Sakura decides not to go to prom and text messages are sent. A lot of them.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,640 - Reviews: 146 - Favs: 523 - Follows: 59 - Published: 5/16/2009 - Sasuke U., Sakura H. - Complete
Gestures by Delicate Desires reviews
All Gaara wanted was a hug, and until she gave him one, she would not be able to leave. Oneshot. Gaara x Sakura
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 665 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 312 - Follows: 46 - Published: 4/16/2009 - Sakura H., Gaara - Complete
Moments by Frannehh reviews
Everyone will have their moments. The happy ones, such as marriage or holding their grandchild in their arms. The sad ones, like death. Sakura Haruno met both. Many times. Maybe too many times.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 284 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 2 - Published: 4/4/2009 - Sakura H., Sasuke U. - Complete
Differences by rawrchelle reviews
Itachi/Sakura. There were many things that Sakura couldn’t see, but she couldn’t believe that she was blind enough to miss something as big as this.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,744 - Reviews: 103 - Favs: 464 - Follows: 61 - Published: 2/5/2009 - Itachi U., Sakura H. - Complete
Conundrum by Phoenix Fanatic reviews
After a small accident, Max and Fang can hear each other's thoughts! Oh, my, this presents a number of challenges... and what if a certain company is interested in this development? -Fax- -Complete-
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 34 - Words: 102,806 - Reviews: 2447 - Favs: 886 - Follows: 423 - Updated: 1/11/2009 - Published: 9/16/2007 - Complete
Age Of Consent by Lady Silvamord reviews
"Sasuke Uchiha, did you just sell me to your crazy older brother?" How Sasuke, Sakura, and Naruto learn that stealing Christmas trees off the Interstate is not the way to go. With help from Law Enforcement Agent Itachi Uchiha, of course. ItaSaku AU.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 16,609 - Reviews: 369 - Favs: 1,518 - Follows: 351 - Updated: 1/1/2009 - Published: 12/31/2008 - Itachi U., Sakura H.
Brainless by rawrchelle reviews
Itachi/Sakura. Non-massacre. She couldn’t count the number of times she’d been told she was stupid. But when Itachi calls her stupid, and so close to Christmas, it’s almost unbearable.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,694 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 357 - Follows: 43 - Published: 12/25/2008 - Itachi U., Sakura H. - Complete
The Lipstick Records by extraordinaire reviews
SASUSAKU. And then, as he’s leaning against the fridge, smirking in that brooding, sexy, amusing kind of way, he says, “I like your red lipstick.” And it was just so hot coming out of his mouth, so what I said next totally ruined it. "I like yours too."
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,197 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 216 - Follows: 24 - Published: 12/20/2008 - Sakura H., Sasuke U. - Complete
The Laws of FanFiction Regarding Haruno Sakura by maliciousqueen reviews
Sakura had some weird things happen to her in fanfiction. Kakashi wants to do the horizontal-tango with her, Akatsuki adopts her and most horrifying of all - Sasuke realises he wants to make babies with her forever! What's a female ninja to do?
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,385 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 55 - Updated: 12/17/2008 - Published: 11/17/2008 - Sakura H.
Dance Dance Revolution by Phoenix Fanatic reviews
Who knew Fang could shake his hips? Then again, who knew he even had them? Oneshot, Faxness
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,602 - Reviews: 175 - Favs: 232 - Follows: 39 - Published: 11/8/2008 - Complete
Surrogate by Alory Shannon reviews
One-shot. Slight crack. Konan’s long-dormant maternal instincts find an outlet in an unlikely source.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,373 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 79 - Follows: 8 - Published: 10/16/2008 - Konan, Deidara - Complete
Through Glass by Lady Hanaka reviews
The world always seems smoother and softer through glass.Distorted views become clear and clear thoughts become distorted. But sometimes, through the distortion, one can finally see what was hidden all along. Two-shot
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,265 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 6 - Published: 9/27/2008 - Itachi U., Shisui U. - Complete
summer lovers by ohwhatsherface reviews
AU. SasuSaku. Wow. You're really pretty. It sucks I met you at a family reunion. Ugh. I so hope we're not related.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,211 - Reviews: 126 - Favs: 276 - Follows: 64 - Updated: 8/13/2008 - Published: 8/8/2008 - Sasuke U., Sakura H. - Complete
Suiren by Eimii reviews
In the midst of the Chuunin Exam, Sakura recalls the promise she made to herself and comes to a realization about her own ninja way... Updates: Side story, 'Affinity' added! Note to new readers: See continuity warning on Chapter 23...
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 24 - Words: 153,361 - Reviews: 730 - Favs: 883 - Follows: 700 - Updated: 8/12/2008 - Published: 7/17/2003 - Sakura H., Anko M.
Risk's by Gemzy reviews
Hinata thinks about risk's.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 434 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/23/2008 - Sai, Hinata H. - Complete
AntiWings by angelforshow reviews
AU. SasuSaku. I want to FLY someday.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,389 - Reviews: 103 - Favs: 244 - Follows: 21 - Published: 6/8/2008 - Sakura H., Sasuke U. - Complete
KAKASHI: The Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual by Diamond Mask reviews
Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of a HATAKE KAKASHI! To enjoy the benefits of owning your very own Copy Nin, read the following guide and learn how to love and care for your KAKASHI!
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,477 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 239 - Follows: 32 - Published: 5/24/2008 - Kakashi H. - Complete
rinse and repeat by ohwhatsherface reviews
AU. Itachi does not like sharing. Especially HIS lavender scented shampoo.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,528 - Reviews: 107 - Favs: 318 - Follows: 45 - Published: 3/23/2008 - Itachi U., Sakura H. - Complete
ITACHI: The Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual by Diamond Mask reviews
Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of an UCHIHA ITACHI unit! With this guide, learn how to raise and love your very own Uchiha Prodigy!
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,423 - Reviews: 74 - Favs: 270 - Follows: 33 - Published: 2/2/2008 - Itachi U. - Complete
Broken Hallelujah by Lady Hanaka reviews
He had taken everything from her. She was an angel with shattered wings and he was the monster who had destroyed her soul. He killed her hope and in doing so killed his own. Because he loved his brother, no matter what people believed. ItaSaku oneshot
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,224 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 210 - Follows: 41 - Published: 12/29/2007 - Itachi U., Sakura H. - Complete
Girl's Nights In by kitsuneasika reviews
Of sleepovers, games, cookies, and potato chips. Lots of mentions of Kingdom Hearts, slight spoilers. Christmas gift for snappleducated. InoSakura. OLD STORY.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,943 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/25/2007 - Ino Y., Sakura H. - Complete
Snakes and Sexy by ohwhatsherface reviews
SasuSaku. Maybe you should just stick to the whipped cream and handcuffs.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,534 - Reviews: 94 - Favs: 256 - Follows: 38 - Published: 12/25/2007 - Sasuke U., Sakura H. - Complete
The Ten Days Of Akatsuki Christmas by dead drifter reviews
Featuring all of our favorite Akatsuki, even Orochimaru makes an appearance! Epileptic Hidan, scary Zetsu, reindeer massacres, tainted fruit cake, Candy Cane Crack and more!
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 12 - Words: 30,753 - Reviews: 145 - Favs: 185 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 12/16/2007 - Published: 12/5/2007 - Hidan, Deidara - Complete
Breakfast is a Bang! by dead drifter reviews
Deidara. Kakuzu. Exploding Cereal. Nuff said.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 820 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 78 - Follows: 9 - Published: 11/20/2007 - Deidara, Kakuzu - Complete
Juxtaposition by paws-bells reviews
ItaSaku Fate works in strange ways. It was a stroke of pure, dumb luck that she had managed to outwit him. Now she was going to experience first hand just how it would feel to have his undivided attention, whether she wants it or not.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 51,027 - Reviews: 840 - Favs: 1,180 - Follows: 1,171 - Updated: 8/3/2007 - Published: 1/25/2007 - Itachi U., Sakura H.
My Life As A Teenage Avenger by ohwhatsherface reviews
I bet you regret going to Sound now, don't you Sasuke–kun?
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,269 - Reviews: 127 - Favs: 331 - Follows: 48 - Published: 7/23/2007 - Sasuke U. - Complete
KISAME: The Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual by Diamond Mask reviews
Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of a HOSHIGAKI KISAME unit! With this guide, you can learn the basics of raising and loving your very own Demon Shark!
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,999 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 166 - Follows: 11 - Published: 7/13/2007 - Kisame H. - Complete
EDWARD: The Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual by Diamond Mask reviews
[v 2.0] Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of an EDWARD ELRIC unit! With this guide, you can learn how to raise and love your very own Fullmetal Alchemist!
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,173 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 203 - Follows: 21 - Published: 6/14/2007 - Edward E. - Complete
A Holiday Secret by Fivercon reviews
Nothing could have dragged it out of her. Not the presents, the spirit of giving, or even the mistletoe could make her tell the truth of what had really happened. SasuSaku. [COMPLETE]
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 20,621 - Reviews: 94 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 47 - Updated: 3/31/2007 - Published: 12/17/2005 - Sakura H., Sasuke U. - Complete
Into Sakura's Lair by ohwhatsherface reviews
While Sakura sleeps, Naruto and Sasuke go through her bag in search of food. Tampons and underwear galore.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,174 - Reviews: 168 - Favs: 669 - Follows: 75 - Published: 3/11/2007 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
Twenty Truths About Hidan by Akatsuki210 reviews
Oneshot. Short vignettes about the immortal scythewielding member of Akatsuki.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,206 - Reviews: 102 - Favs: 205 - Follows: 34 - Published: 1/7/2007 - Hidan - Complete
SASUKE: The Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual by Wicked Enough reviews
/Done with Permission/v 2.0/ Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of an UCHIHA SASUKE unit! With a little help from this manual, you'll learn the basics of feeding, bathing, and glomping an UCHIHA SASUKE!
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,818 - Reviews: 298 - Favs: 906 - Follows: 100 - Updated: 9/25/2006 - Published: 8/29/2005 - Sasuke U. - Complete
Never Hear Them Say by MysticFirefly reviews
Basically, this is a bunch of things you'd never hear Team 7 say. It's pointless and random but if you like that, come on in. oneshot?
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 875 - Reviews: 81 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 8/10/2006 - Published: 7/12/2006
Akatsuki Goes to WalMart Super Center by AkiraDawn reviews
Well, the title pretty much speaks for itself. One can only imagine what Akatsuki may do at a WalMart Super Center...rated for language R&R Enjoy and be ready to laugh...alot!
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 6 - Words: 5,495 - Reviews: 96 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 7/15/2006 - Published: 7/10/2006 - Itachi U. - Complete
Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual to GAARA by Persepolis130 reviews
Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of your very own SABAKU NO GAARA unit. To make sure you receive the full benefits from your super creepy, demon possessed insomniac, it is suggested that you read the following information thoroughly.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,280 - Reviews: 102 - Favs: 313 - Follows: 35 - Published: 6/16/2006 - Gaara - Complete
Dear Foolish Little Brother by solderini reviews
Like all good boys, Itachi writes home occasionally.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,061 - Reviews: 1810 - Favs: 5,349 - Follows: 769 - Published: 4/2/2004 - Itachi U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Her Paper Heart by Kerrie-chan reviews
It's Sasuke's birthday and Naruto and Sakura are throwing him a party...except he's in a sour mood and refuses to budge, how will Sakura coax him out?
Naruto - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,585 - Reviews: 106 - Favs: 227 - Follows: 32 - Published: 7/2/2003 - Sasuke U., Sakura H. - Complete
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Piggyback Rides reviews
For Pai-chan. Stuff I needed to get out of my mind . . . such as Sakura demanding a piggyback ride from Kakashi; Sasuke killing Sakura; something about Tsunade's funeral . . . Idk. So yeah. FLAME ME, MOTHAFUCKAS. These are OLD. I warn you! D:
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,387 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 4/1/2011 - Sakura H.
Friends reviews
Still, as she watched her stumble around the dining room with her old, studded pumps on, proclaiming quite excitedly, "I'm like a movie star!" she couldn't stop smiling as she took another sip of beer, because for now- A friend was enough for her.
NANA - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 375 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/6/2010 - Nana, Hachi - Complete