xXRamenMasterXx
hide bio
PM . Follow . Favorite
Joined 10-13-13, id: 5233784, Profile Updated: 01-27-15
Author has written 1 story for Warriors.

NORMAL PEOPLE: See a stick with marks on it and ignore it.

WARRIORS FANS: See a stick with marks on it and know it is Jayfeather's.

NORMAL PEOPLE: say 'OH MY GOSH' (OMG).

WARRIORS FANS: say 'OH MY STARCLAN' (OMSC).

NORMAL PEOPLE: go to a psychiatrist to tell their feelings.

WARRIORS FANS: know Rock is watching them.

NORMAL PEOPLE: say 'Shut up or I'll tell on you!'

WARRIORS FANS: say 'Shut up or Tigerstar will get you!'

NORMAL PEOPLE: say 'Dang it!'

WARRIORS FANS: say 'Fox Dung!'

NORMAL PEOPLE: when being chased yell 'HELP ME, SOMEBODY!'

WARRIORS FANS: when being chased yell 'SPOTTEDLEAF, SHOW ME THE WAY!'

NORMAL PEOPLE: Think black cats are bad luck.

WARRIORS FANS: Think black cats are from ShadowClan.

NORMAL PEOPLE: Ignore this.

WARRIORS FANS: Copy this on their page just like I did.


Warriors Have Taught us These Things

Violence doesn't solve all problems, but it does solve some. And they should be solved very violently.

Cats can have accents.

Old people are funny.

If your girlfriend dies, the default response is to sleep with her sister.

No matter how right you are, you're still wrong in some way.

Your logic doesn't have to make sense if you're angry enough.

Killing your half-brother solves all of your problems for 6-12 months.

Having fangirls gives you the right to do virtually anything without being considered evil.

There are no limits to how you can kill your own brother, half-brother included.

Casual racism is socially acceptable. More severe racism is less approved of, but still allowed. Only outright genocide crosses the line.

Most children in southern England will squeal when they see a cat.

Good is cute, maybe handsome; Evil is sexy.

Highly organized colonies of feral cats have been living in the English countryside for over 60 years without being noticed by anyone.

Cats are really good at cleaning up massive bloodstains.

If you eat too much fish, your blood tastes fishy.

It's possible to complain about anything.

The object that cats should fear the most is a purple pen.

All barn cats are weird.

Happy endings are completely unrealistic.

No matter how depressed you get, there is always a way to become more crazy.

Plans that rely on the cooperation of others have a tendency not to work.

Gaining nine lives causes you to die nine times as frequently as everyone else.

Major antagonists have a tendency to die the most slow and violent deaths imaginable.

Life: You don't win. You break even. At best.

The general public doesn't know anything. Anything. Yourself included.

The default response to being dumped by someone is to devote yourself to making them watch their family die slow, painful deaths.

People named after plants tend to be red herrings. People named after animals are the real deal.

Don't fight the system, no matter how messed up it is.

Stars are really the spirits of dead cats.

Just because someone has gone to that dark place down under doesn't mean you don't have to deal with them anymore.

The width of someone's shoulders is a good indicator of how strong and experienced they are.

Don't mess with beavers.

Thunderstorms are inherently dramatic.

Someone is angry at you when clouds cover the moon.

Forbidden relationships happen about as often as socially legitimate ones.

Breaking the rules is bad. Bending the rules is good.

If you're ever near death or dying, you will survive anyway.

Most people would listen to Hitler if he was nice to them.

If you start to see a red haze, stop what you are doing!

Lying is the most evil thing ever.

The happier your relationship, the more tragically it will end.

People who secretly like you make the best evil minions.

It's possible to not notice that you are pregnant.

If you try hard enough, you can be pregnant and give birth without anyone noticing.

If you play with your food, an owl will come and eat you.

Incest doesn't count if it isn't immediately noticeable.

If you're related to anyone important, chances are you'll have superpowers.


Works Worth Reading

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10030194/1/Warrior-s-Couple-s-Counseling

It's a good comic relief! cx

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10731246/1/Safe-Haven-1-Nightcloud-s-Refuge

Beautiful storywriting, Tansy!

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Into the Dream by Veni0Vidi0Vici reviews
[surreal AU of Into the Wild] No matter how dark times are for ThunderClan, things can always get darker. But what do kits know of darkness?
Warriors - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 692 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/4/2014 - Brackenfur, Cinderpelt, Brightheart, Thornclaw
Blue Sky by wafflestories reviews
Meteors, signals, apologies, and that tricky little thing called humanity- four years after the events of Portal II, Wheatley's been handed a second chance, but it's not going to be plain sailing…
Portal - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 15 - Words: 169,766 - Reviews: 1149 - Favs: 3,113 - Follows: 980 - Updated: 4/1/2012 - Published: 10/3/2011 - Wheatley, Chell - Complete
Clans of the Cards
The Cards have been chosen, and the Secrets unfold. The revealing of the Truth is coming soon. R&R, rated T for violence and because I'm paranoid.
Warriors - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 213 - Published: 1/30/2015