my Bio

Im a Girl

Love to read and write (duh)

am in depression

fail at math

rock at science and geography

Instructions: Put your ipod or music player on shuffle and the song that pops is the answer to each question.

1. How does the world see you?Genie in a bottle. Christina Aguilera

2. Will I have a happy life?Isn't it ironic. Alanis Morrisette

3. What do my friends really think of me? When you're mad. Ne-yo

4. Do people secretly lust after me? 4ever by the Veronicas

5. How can I make myself happy? Mouth shut by the Veronicas

6. What should I do with my life?So What by Pink

7. What is some good advice for me? Take me away by Avril Lavigne

8. How will I be remembered? Complicated by Avril Lavigne

9. What is my signature dancing song? Sticks And stones By Aly and Aj

10. What do I think my current theme song is? Losing Myself by the Veronicas

11. What does everyone else think my current theme song is? I'm a bitch ,I'm a lover by Alanis Morrisette

12. What song will play at my funeral? Fire and Ice By Enya

13. What type of men/women do you like?chasing Cars by snow patrol

14. What is my day going to be like? Sticks and stone by aly and aj

15. What will tomorrow bring? i'm in love by t-pain

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with the House of Night, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone:

Iheartjake, TeamJacob101, Lunamione7, Sunshine0235, I-Wish-For-Wings, maximumcullenxxx,wolf chick 14

In case you need further proof that the human ace is doomed because of stupidity, here are some actual instructions on consumer goods.

On a Myer hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (Darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of chips: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special?)

On a bar of Palmolive soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. (And that would be how??)

On some frozen dinners: Serving Suggestion: Defrost. (But it's just a suggestion.)

On Nanna's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Well, duh, a bit late, huh?)

On Mark's & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after hot after heating." (And you thought??...)

On packaging for a K-Mart iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (But wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those five-year-olds with head colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: Warning: May cause drowsiness. (And I'm taking this... because?)

On most brands of Christmas tree lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (As opposed to... what?)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (Now, somebody help me out on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning: keep out of children. (hmm...something must have gotten lost in the translation...)

On packet on Nobby's Peanuts: Warning: Contains nuts. (Talk about a news flash!)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts. (Step 3: maybe, uh... fly Delta?)

(I don't blame the company on this one; I blame the parents) On a child's Superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."

If scientists were ever going to figure out how to travel through time, wouldn’t we now be seeing people from the future?

If our body temperature is normally 98.6 degrees, how come when it's 98 degrees outside, no one is comfortable?

Why is it the TWELVE days of Christmas when there is only one day of Christmas?

Since a running back runs forward, why is he called a running back?

Why is "number" abbreviated as "no"? When there is no "o" in number?

Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer and then have them read about wars in school that solved America's problems?

Why is Donkey Kong called "DONKEY" Kong if he's a monkey?

If a bunch of cats jump on top of each other, is it still called a dog pile?

When a boy is named after his dad, he is called 'Junior,' but what do
you call a girl that is named after her mother?

If your name is Mr. Crunch, and you joined the Navy, would you eventually be Captain Crunch?

If all of the Acme stuff doesn't work, why does Wile Coyote keep buying their products?

364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from
strangers, yet on Halloween, its encouraged! Why is that ?

Why is it when we laugh in school the teachers say do you find something funny? When obviously we do?

Why do people call it an ATM machine, but they know it's really saying Automated Teller Machine Machine?

Why do people say PIN number when that truly means Personal Identification Number Number?

If all else fails, destroy all evidence that you tried.

Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.

The person who smiles when things go wrong has found someone to blame it on.

Better to stay silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt.

Never argue with an idiot. They'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

I'd tell you to go to hell, but I work there and really don't want to see you everyday.

Normal people scare me...but not as much as I scare them.

Even if the voices aren't real, they have some good ideas.

Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back.

Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

A wise man once said, "Ask a girl."

When in doubt, push random buttons!

Fighting is mind over matter. I don't mind, and you don't matter.

You wanna know why God created man before woman? Every masterpiece needs a rough draft!

There's always a light at the end of the tunnel. Of course, it's usually an oncoming express train.

There are three kinds of people. Those who learn by reading, a few who learn by observation, and the rest who have to test the electric fence for themselves.

They say guns don't kill people; people do. Well, I think guns help. I mean, if you just stood there and yelled 'BANG!' I don't think you'd kill many people...

Just when I think you've said the stupidest thing ever you just keep on talking.

You know, you do this annoying thing where you open your mouth and then these things you call words come out. Yeah like that. Stop it.

He who laughs last thinks slowest.

An idiot is a 44th floor window washer who steps back to admire his work.

They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance.

Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?

Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies.

Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.

A clear conscience is usually a sign of memory loss.

There are no stupid questions, just a lot of inquisitive idiots.

I'm not as dumb as you look.

The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not.

We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police.

If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.

Sarcasm is one more service we offer.

Hate is just a special kind of love we give to people who suck.

I used to have super powers, but then my therapist took them away.

They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room?

Some people are like slinkies. They seem to have no purpose, but they still bring you a smile when you push them down the stairs.

Keep smiling; it makes people wonder what you're up to.

Love your enemies. It gets them really confused.

Silence is golden but duct tape is silver.

It's ok to argue with two characters on your shoulders.

Writing isn't a career, it's more of a mental illness.

Anything thrown hard enough should hurt.

Curiosity killed the cat, satisfaction brought him back, but stupidity killed him again.

Flying is simple, you just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Some say the glass is half full, some say it's half empty, I say, "Are you gonna drink that?"

All people have the right to stupidity but some people abuse the privilege.

When I was born, I was so shocked that I didn't talk for a year and a half.

Where there's a will...I want to be in it.

Do not disturb, I'm disturbed already.

The trouble with life, is there's no background music.

A clean house is a sign of a broken computer!

Do not walk behind me for I may not lead, do not walk in front of me for I may not follow, do not walk beside me either. JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!

Don't piss me off, I'm running out of places to hide the bodies.

For people who like peace and quiet: Get me a CORDLESS PHONE!

I don't get even, I get odder.

If being an idiot hurt, then you would be in constant pain.

If I were any lazier, I would slip into a coma!

If life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Then throw it back at life and steal the oranges you asked for!

If life gives you lemons...throw them at someone.

When life gives you lemons, say "What else have you got?" you might get something else

In order to lose your mind, you have to have one in the first place.

I've learned from my mistakes, and I'm sure I could repeat them exactly.

Light travels faster than sound. That is why...some people seem bright until you hear them speak.

You have the right to remain silent, anything you say will be misquoted and used against you.

An optimist is someone who falls off the empire state building and after 50 floors says "So far so good!"

If Fed ex and UPS merge, they would be called Fed UP.

Never drink water...if it can rust iron, think of what it can do to your stomach.

Chaos, panic, pandemonium, my work here is done.

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.

A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, he said "no". She asked him if he would want to be with her foever...and he said "no". She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry? and once again he replied with a "no". She had heard enough. as she walked away, tears streaming down her face, the boy grabbed her arm and said... You're not pretty, you're Beautiful. I don't ever want to be with you forever, I Need to be with you forever, and I won't cry if you went away...I'd...die

Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Boy: No
Girl: Do you like me?
Boy: No
Girl: Do you want me?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you live for me?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Boy: No
Girl: Choose--me or your life
Boy: My life
The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...
The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
The reason I don't want you is because I need you.
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.

A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle
Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: I love you, now slow down!
Guy: Now give me a big hug.
She gives him a big hug
Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.
In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she could live.
If you would do this for a loved one copy and paste.

There's a 13 year old girl, and she wished
that her dad would come home from
the army, because he'd been having
problems with his heart and right
leg. It was 2:53 p.m . When she made
her wish. At 3:07 p.m. (14 minutes
later), the doorbell rang, and
there her Dad was, luggage and all!!

I'm Katie and I'm 20 and I've been
having trouble in my job and on the
verge of quitting. I made a simple
wish that my boss would get a new
job. That was at 1:35 and at 2:55
there was an announcement that he
was promoted and was leaving for
another city. Believe me...this
really works!

My name is Ann and I am 45 years
of age. I had always been single
and had been hoping to get into a
nice, loving relationship for many
years. While kind of daydreaming
(and right after receiving this email)
I wished that a quality person would
finally come into my life. That was at
9:10 AM on a Tuesday. At 9:55 AM
a FedEx delivery man came into my
office.He was cute, polite and
could not stop smiling at me. He
started coming back almost everyday
(even without packages) and asked me
out a week later. We married 6
months later and now have been
happily married for 2 years.

What a great email it was!!

Just scroll down to the end, but
while you do, think of a wish.
Make your wish when you have completed
scrolling. Whatever age you are, is the
number of minutes it will take for your
wish to come true. ex.you are 25 years
old, it will take 25 minutes for your wish
to come true).

Go for it!

SCROLL DOWN!

STOP!

Congratulations! Your wish will
now come true in your age minutes.

Now follow this carefully...it
can be very rewarding!

If you repost this within the next 5 min.
something major that you've been wanting
will happen.

This is scary!

The phone will ring right after you repost!

20 WAYS TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and
point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want
fries with that.

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN".

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has
gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for smuggling
diamonds".

7. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the
prophecy".

8. Don't use any punctuation.

9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat - with a serious
face.

11. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".

12. Sing along at the opera.

13. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical
sounds all day at work.

14. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their
party because you're not in the mood.

16. Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, Rock
Bottom.

17. When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I won! I won!"

18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot
yelling, "run for your lives, they're loose!!"

19. Tell your children over dinner "due to the economy, we are
going to have to let one of you go."

20. And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity . . .
e-mail this to someone to make them smile and laugh. Its called therapy

A billion is a difficult number to comprehend, but one advertising agency did a good job of putting that figure into perspective in one of its releases:
-A billion seconds ago it was 1960.
-A billion minutes ago Jesus was alive
-A billion hours ago our ancestors were living in the Stone Age.
-A billion dollars only lasts 5 hours and 20 minutes, at the rate Washington spends it.

"F--ed up.
Insecure.
Neurotic.
Emotional.
Honestly, I'm FINE!"

I am not afraid of the dark,

I am afraid of what is lurking in it.

I am not afraid of heights,

I am afraid of falling.

I am not afraid of falling in love,

I am afraid of not being loved back

I'm the kinda girl...

I'm the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of adead silence because of something that happened yesterday.

I'm the kind of girl who would rather act stupid than smart.

I'm the kind of girl who would get fired at the M&M's company for eating most of them.

I'm the kind of girl who in an awkward silence or someone says something awkward would laugh.

I'm the kind of girl who's not afraid to prank my friends.

I'm the kind of girl who would make my friends laugh by just being with them for a few minutes.

A blond, a brunette and a redhead are stuck on an island.

For years, they live there, and one day they find a magic lamp.

They rub it, and sure enough, out comes a genie. The genie says "since I can only give out 3 wishes, you may each have one."

So the brunette goes first, "I have been stuck here for years, I miss my family and my husband and my life - I just want to go home."

POOF, she is gone.

The redhead makes her wish, "This place sucks, I want to go home too."

POOF, she is gone.

The blond starts crying uncontrollably.

The genie asks, "What is the matter?"

The blond said, "I wish my friends were here."

Poof. two mad people are there.

Joke #2

A Blond, Brunette, and a red head were at gun point in a mall.

The man said to the brunette, "Any last words?"

"A tornado!" she yells and gets away.

The man turned to the red head. "Any last words?"

"Sand storm!" the red head yelled and got away.

He turned to the blonde and said, "Any last words?"

"Fire!"

"Okay..." the man said and fired the gun.

Another joke(can't count past 2)

A blond walks in to a wall. (Enough said)

9 Things I Hate About Everyone:

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.. I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2 People who are willing to get off their butt to search the entire room for the T.V.. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

3 When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". darn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4 When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Idiots!

5 When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid 12 to come to the cinema and stare at the darn floor.

6 People who ask "Can I ask you a question?". Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7. When something is 'new and improved!' Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

8 When people say "life is short". What the heck?? Life is the longest darn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

9 When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbie?

i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs cpoy and psate it in yuor pofrile

IN A LIFT: Drop you pen on the floor and stare at it for a long time, trying to get someone to pick it up. When they reach down to get it for you, yell out "That's my pen!"

IN THE CINEMA: Wait for it to go quiet and then stand up loudly and yell "I can't find the remote to change the channel!"

This is a strictly mathematical viewpoint...it goes like this:
What Makes 100? What does it mean to give MORE than 100? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100. How about achieving 103? What makes up 100 in life?
Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:
If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
Is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98

And

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96
But ,

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100

And,

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118
So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that While Hard work and
Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's the Bullshit and Ass kissing that will put you over the top

REMEMBER WHEN ..
getting HiGH meant swinging at a playground?
the worst thing you could get from a boy was c0otiEs?
when )m 0 m( was your hero
and 'D a D' was the boy you were gonna marry?
when your W0RST ENEMiES were your siblings
and rAcE iSsuEs were about who ran fastest?
when - WAR- was a card game
and life was simple and care free?
remember when all you wanted to do
WAS GROW UP?

Idk. It's funny though

MURPHY'S LESSER-KNOWN LAWS:

1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright

until you hear them speak.

2. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

3. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

4. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

5. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

6. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something

right, there's a 90 probability you'll get it wrong.

7. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be

stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the

fog.

8. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

9. The things that come to those who wait, will be the things left by those

who got there first.

10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he

will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

11. A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.

12. The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.

13. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

14. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12

people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

ONE FOR THE GIRLS!

(1) A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I'm gonna make you the happiest woman alive." the woman replies, "i'll miss you..."

(2)Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And
Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength,
I'll beat him to death. AMEN

(3) Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for
breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.

(4) Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor

25 Things My Mother Taught Me

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don 't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25.My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

They laugh because we're losers...
We laugh because they just figured it out.

A blonde was walking back and forth from her house to her mail box. She made the trip over and over again. Finally her neighbor asked her what she was doing. She replied "My computer keeps telling me I have mail!"

People say I'm stupid, I tell them not to be jealous!

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...

A girl walks up to a boy in a laughing group of cool kids and pulls him aside.

"Why do you hang out with them?" she asked.

"Because they're my friends," he said.

"Why do they make fun of each other?" she asked

"because there's no one else around to make fun of," he said.

"Why do you force your smile?" she asked.

"Because it's not funny," he said.

"Why do they insult everyone?" she asked.

"Because they like to see them cry," he said.

"Why do they like that?" She asked

"Because they decide who the soft people are," he said.

"Why do you hang out with them?" she asked again.

"Because I don’t want to be with the soft," he said

"Do they still insult you?" she asked.

"Yes," he said.

"Do you stand through it?" she asked.

"Yes," he said.

"Do you think the soft are nice?" she asked.

"Yes," he said.

"Be friends with them and have a trustful, loving, friendly relationship." She said and started to walk away.

"Who are you?" he asked.

"Self realization."

If at first you don't succeed, try walking around the brick wall.

You have more chance of dying by an asteroid collision than in a plane crash.

The dimensions of the Space Shuttle, one of humanities greatest achievements, were specified over 2500 years ago by a horse.

"They say one day your whole life will flash before your eyes, make it worth watching." ~ Anonymous

"I'm the kind of person that walks into a door and apologizes." ~ Anonymous

"I’m not clumsy…the floor just hates me." ~ Anonymous

"Anyone can reach their stars…and if you can’t reach, catch one that falls." ~ Anonymous

"Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door..." ~ Anonymous

"You know it's going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor." ~ Anonymous

"Behind every bitch is a guy who made her that way." ~ Anonymous

"It's not how you pick your nose; it's where you put the booger." ~ Anonymous

"I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law." ~ Anonymous

"An apple always keeps the doctor away, if well aimed." ~ Anonymous

"Ever stopped to think and forgot to start again?" ~ Anonymous

"My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil." ~ Anonymous

"Therapist = The/rapist... scary thought." ~ Anonymous

"Don't drink and drive. You might spill your beer." ~ Anonymous

"Okay, so what's the speed of dark?" ~ Anonymous

THINGS TO PONDER:
Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
So what's the speed of dark?
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?
How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't live there?
Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food?
If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?
Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?
Wouldn't it be smart to make the sticky stuff on envelopes taste like chocolate?
Why are the commercials for cable companies on cable but not on regular television? Don't they want the people without cable to buy the cable?
Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning 'many' in Latin, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures'?
If Mars had earthquakes would they be called marsquakes?

I AM:

procrastinator to the max.
friendly, but easy to piss off.
creativity is what I aim for.
too serious or too juvenile.
wear my heart on my sleeve…and hate it.
a tendency to be cynical.
memory of a goldfish.
a self-proclaimed sap.
passionate and dulcet.
critical and austere.

Did you know...

kissing is healthy.

bananas are good for period pain.

it's good to cry.

chicken soup actually makes you feel better.

94 percent of boys would love it if you sent them flowers.

lying is actually unhealthy.

you really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes.

it's actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you.

89 percent of guys want YOU to make the first move.

it's impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed.

chocolate will make you feel better.

most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing.

a good friend never judges.

a good foundation will hide all hickeys... not that you have any.

boys aren't worth your tears.

we all love surprises.