Hi Welcome to my account.

Hobbies: Writing/Reading Fan Fiction, sleeping, eating, listening to sad music and watch sad but beautifully made videos and playing violin.

Likes: Anime, Vocaloid, KPOP - (BTS, GOT7, Shinee, Teice, Gfriend etc), sweet stuff, like cream puff, cake, strawberries... never mind and finally Manga and anything Vanilla or Grape and My Favourite colours are Orange, Purple, Black, White and Gold

Into: Gender bending, twin fics, hurt and comfort, angst, mystery, humor and romance

Birthday: 3rd July

Story progress

(Oneshots not included)

Adopted Stories

Summery: FemTsuna. Vongola gets destroyed and as sole survivor, Vindice sends her to the past to change the future, to Primo's time. Living with Primo and his Guardians, Tsunayuki helps them to bring Vongola stronger to prevent another repeat

Summery: Tsuna gained immortality in Cielo's time, and now is a brother of Sawda Hideishi. He lived 400 years ago, drawing paintings of all Vongola Bosses as a famous artist. He doesn't want to be in the mafia, but Reborn wanted to make Hide into the Vongola Boss and now wants Tsuna to be mist guardian!

Not Completed Stories

Summery: What if all of Tsuna's guardians where hit by Giannini's failed bazooka when Tsuna was at a all skies meeting. They travelled to many different worlds seeing each sifferent Tsuna as 'ghost' figures. Allx27 Yaoi Drabble series

Summery: Mukuro finds three kids huddled in the back of a cell in the Estrano, he takes pity on them and takes them with him when he escaped. Few years later they encounter the mafia. Yaoi. Pairings 1827 6996 80Oc

Summary: What if Tsuna had a twin brother and a little sister. He had learned about the Mafia when he was young and wanted to protect his family and friends but what will happen when Reborn comes. 18xOc Rx27 69x96 33xHana 80x59 GxAsari LxIpin

How You Know You’re Addicted to Yaoi/Slash

1. You start mentally pairing up random guys on the street.
2. You wish you had gay friends just so you could perve on them kissing their boyfriends.
3. You don’t remember the last time you read a heterosexual fanfiction.
4. You have developed a sexual fetish for handcuffs, leather and BDSM.
5. If you are a heterosexual girl, you keep trying to seme your boyfriend, despite the fact that you don’t have the necessary parts.
6. You suddenly become interested in gay rights, thinking this will increase your opportunities for voyeristic activities.
7. You try to get your friends into it, simply so you can talk to them about it without them getting that bored look on their face.
8. You keep lying about the number of hours you spend each day on the computer reading slash fanfiction, watching yaoi anime etc.
9. The most exiting moment of your life so far was when you discovered hentai manga.
10. You celebrate turning 18 not because you can watch R movies, but because you’re old enough to watch movies with explicit gay sex scenes.
11. It’s the only aphrodesiac you need.
12. When your boyfriend tells you he’s gay and has been dating another man, you immediately ask if you can join in.
13. Your gay son wishes he had a normal, homophobic mother who didn’t ask him questions about his latest sexual exploits.

If you’re reading this and nodding to yourself, post it on your profile page. I LOVE YAOI!!!!!

Favorite Animes (Not in order but KHR is my favorite)

1# Katekyo Hitman Reborn (KHR)

2# Angel beats

3# Sword Art Online (SAO)

4# 07 Ghost

5# Dog Days

6# Shugo Chara

7# Fruits basket

8# Blue Exorcist

9# Inuyasha

10# Naruto

11# Detective Conan/Cased Closed

12# Magic Kaito/1412

13# Shokugeki No Soma

Favorite pairings

KHR

1827 (HibarixTsuna)

A27 (AlaudexTsuna)

R27 (RebornxTsuna)

9627 (ChromexTsuna)

G27 (GiottoxTsuna)

AG (AlaudexGiotto)

X27 (XanxusxTsuna)

V27 (VerdexTsuna)

0027 (EnmaxTsuna)

0127 (UnixTsuna)

All27 (EveryonexTsuna)

8059 (YamamotoxGokudera)

(All these pairings but Fem27 [Female Tsuna] works as well)

Magic Kaito/1412-Detective Conan/Cased Closed

ShinichixKaito

AixConan

ConanxKaito

HakubaxShinichixKaito

Shokugeki No Soma/ Food Wars

IsshikixSoma

EishixSoma

ShinomiyaxSoma

AkiraxSoma

RyouxSoma

GinxSoma

(All work with FemSoma as well)

Favorite Characters from KHR

(not in order)

1- Hibari Kyoya

2- Alaude

3- Reborn

4- Xanxus

5- Yuni

6- Sawada Tsunayoshi

7- Chrome

8- Giotto

9- Bel

10- Fran

What if:

1) Number 1 woke you up in the middle of the night?

I'd keep silent but in my mind I'd be uncharacteristically squealing

2) Number 3 walked into the bathroom while you’re showering?

Shout 'Reborn get out!!!'

3) Number 4 announced they’re going to marry 9 tomorrow?

That would NEVER happen but in the unfortunate event of that I'd puke

4) Number 5 cooked you dinner?

Be really happy

5) Number 6 was lying next to you on the beach sleeping?

Sigh in Happiness and enjoy the peaceful sile- "JUDAIMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" Shoot

6) Number 7 suddenly confessed to be part of your family?

Hug her and say I'd love that

7) Number 8 got into the hospital somehow?

Be worried super worried

8) Number 9 made fun of your friends?

Don't care or cheer him on but most likely I would kicked him onto the lower pavement and acquaint him with the beautiful concrete of my beloved school.

9) Number 10 ignored you all the time?

Don't mind to much but still be sad

10) Two serial killers are hunting you down. What will 1 do?

Bite them to death but probably not for me

11) You’re on a vacation with 2 and manage to break your leg. What does 2 do?

Bring me to the hospital and leave or leave me there

12) It’s your birthday. What will 3 give you?

Maybe nothing

13) You’re stuck in a house that’s on fire. What does 4 do?

he's the one who caused it

14) You’re about to do something that’ll make you feel extremely embarrassed. What will 5 do?

Try and not make me feel bad about it or stop it

15) You’re about to marry number 10. What’s 1’s reaction?

Silent but I know inside he is jealous (joking)

16) You got dumped by someone. How will 7 cheer you up?

Show me happy illusions

17) You compete in a tournament. How does 9 support you?

Not kill me

18) You can’t stop laughing. What will 10 do?

Nothing at first but gets annoyed and shuts me up somehow

19) Number 1 is all you've ever dreamed of. Why?

He is handsome, strong, cool, has a soft spot for animals and uses tonfas, he also care for people in his own way.

20) Number 2 tells you about their deeply hidden love for number 9.

I'd say your not the only one and swear not to tell anyone though

21) You’re dating 3 and they introduce you to their parents. Would you get along?

Ne has no parents but if he did I guess?

22) Number 4 loves number 9 as well. What does that mean?

Everyone loves Bel (Ushishishi)

23) Will number 5 and 6 ever kiss?

NEVER

24) Number 6 appears to be a player, breaking many hearts. What do you do?

Give him to Reborn or Hibari or Alaude but tell them not to kill him

25) You had your hair done (Dyed or cut) and 7 can’t stop looking at you. What goes on in your mind?

Why is he staring at me? Hmm... don't know *Walks away*

26) Number 8 thinks he’ll never get a girl/boyfriend. What will you tell him?

say It's okay you will definitely get a girl/boyfriend with that smile

27) Number 9 is too shy to face you and confesses their love by sending an e-mail. Now what?

I would say yes and give him a big hug.

28) You spot 10 kissing 1. How do you react?

I'd walk back to my room, shut my brain down and faint or think the world has ended (also good blackmail material)

29) You notice that 3 and 4 have been inside that hotel room for MORE than a few hours. What are you thinking?

I think 'why are those two in there' and just go to my room's window an fly out using my DyingWill flames

30) Could 1 and 6 be soul mates?

Yes! 1827

31) Would 2 trust 5?

No

32) Number 4 is bored and pokes 10. What happens after that?

Nothing

33) 5 and 1 are forced to go back to school together. What study will they pick?

1 discipline committee again and 5 everything she is smart

34) If 6 and 3 cooked dinner, what would they make?

Pasta or sashimi

35) 7 and 9 apply for a job. What job?

Slicing, chopping, cutting etc

36) 8 gives 5 a haircut. Is that okay?

Yup

37) What 6’s perfect girl/boyfriend should look like; will 6 be happy?

Like Kyoya/Alaude or Reborn and yes

38) 10 and 9 are blushing while they talk. What is their conversation about?

Yaoi stuff or embarrassing stuff

39) 1 accidentally kicked 10.

Not accidentally

40) 2 sent a message to their bf/gf but 9 got it. What would happen?

He would Ushishishishi and send something back

41) 5 and 6 did a workout together.

It be okay

42) 6 noticed they weren’t invited to your birthday?

I'd send him one because his must have gotten lost in the mail

43) 7 won the lottery.

Cheer for her

44) 8 had quite a big secret.

Try and find out

45) 9 became a singer.

I knew he was good at singing

46) 10 got a daughter.

Be very happy... and wonder who the hell the mother is!

47) What would 1 think of 2?

your an carnivore but also an herbivore for looking like me

48) How would 3 greet 4?

Nod/Ciaossu or land on his shoulder

49) What would 4 envy about 5?

Nothing :D

50) What dream would 5 have about 6?

Decimo or respect

51) What do 6 and 7 have in common?

They're both shy and kind

52) What would make 7 angry at 8?

She is too gentle for that... He calls her a pineapple

53) Where would 8 meet 9?

Anywhere... Maybe in a fight though

54) What would 9 never dare to tell 10?

Anything related to love but everything else he would shout out

55) What would make 10 scared of 2?

2 takes away his hat

56) “1 and 9 are in a happy relationship until 9 suddenly runs off with 4. 1, broken-hearted, has a one-night stand with 7 and a brief unhappy affair with 10, then follows the wise advice of 5 and finds true love with 2." What title would you give this fic?

Sorry I wouldn't write something like that.

57) Who would make a better college professor: 5, or 10?

5

58)If 10 Wasn't in the Mafia, what would his/her job be?

don't have one

59) Describe a sleepover with 4 & 7.

separate the whole night and on 4's side there would be lots of noise and on 7's side there would be silence

60) You're out on a fun date with 8 at an amusement park. What would he suggest the two of you do first?

a robot ride

61) If 9, 3 & 1 were a band, what do you think they'd be called?

the three singers who don't sing... or simply Vongola Band of Silent people... or Vongola Band

62) If you wrote a song-fic about 7 what song would you choose?

Setsuna no kioku

63) How would you bribe 6?

with Hibari or Reborn or a hug

This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murder chanted, "Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read this chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded. Lucillia

If you start reading this... you can't go out *smiles evily*

Once... There was a girl with long black hair... she was pretty. Very pretty. One day, someone pushed her in front of the mirror, thus making her head hit shards of glass... Blood scattered on the remaining shards. Her face remains in the mirror forever... and ever... and ever... Until she succeeds to kill her jealous murder. She will haunt you. Everywhere you go. In your dreams, on your street, on your phone... One day... when you look in a mirror, after reading this, she will appear. "You're not pretttyyyy..." she'll say. You'll die that day because of a shard stuck in your brain... If you post this on your profile, she will bother your worst enemy. You will be rewarded.

R.I.P. to That girl you called a slut in class today. She's a virgin.

The pregnant girl walking down the street. She got raped.

The boy you called lame. He has to work every night to support his family.

That girl you pushed down the other day. At home she's already being abused.

That girl you called fat. She's starving herself.

The old man you made fun of cause ugly scars. He fought for our country.

The boy you made fun of for crying. His mother is dying.

You think you know them. Guess what? You don't!

RE-POST if you are against bullying.

FAKE VS. REAL

FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food.

REAL FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food.

FAKE FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr./Mrs.

REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM.

FAKE FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.

REAL FRIENDS: Will sit next to you saying “Dang … we really messed up … but that sure was fun!”

FAKE FRIENDS: Never seen you cry.

REAL FRIENDS: Cry with you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.

REAL FRIENDS: Keep your stuff so long they forget it’s yours.

FAKE FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.

REAL FRIENDS: Can write a book about you, with direct quotes from you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

REAL FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds butt that left you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will knock on your front door.

REAL FRIENDS: Walk right in and say “I’M HOME!”

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you.

REAL FRIENDS: Will knock them the fuck out!

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world.

REAL FRIENDS: Not only kick everything out of their schedule to listen to whats wrong, but help come up with vindictive plans to make you feel a whole lot better!

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Make you say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours.

REAL FRIENDS: Come right over and hang out with you, until you either fall asleep, or kick them out.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Would go to your funeral if you were murdered.

REAL FRIENDS: Would skip the funeral and go out looking for the murderer and kill him!!

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will help me find my way when I'm lost.

REAL FRIENDS: Will be the one messing with my compass, stealing my map and giving me bad directions.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will help me learn to drive.

REAL FRIENDS: Will help me roll the car into the lake so I can collect insurance.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will help me up when I fall down.

REAL FRIENDS: Will point and laugh because they tripped me.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will go to a concert with me.

REAL FRIENDS: Will kidnap the band with me.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Hide me from the cops.

REAL FRIENDS: Are probably the reason they're after me in the first place.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Let me make an idiot of myself in public.

REAL FRIENDS: Are up there with me making an idiot out of themselves too.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will try to comfort me when my boyfriend/girlfriend breaks up with me.

REAL FRIENDS: Will kick my ass until I get it together and will smack him/her for breaking up with me.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will help me move.

REAL FRIENDS: Will help me move a body.

FAKE FRIENDS: Are for awhile.

REAL FRIENDS: Are for life.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will ignore this.

REAL FRIENDS: Will re-post it

100 Rules of Anime

The laws of Anime is a growing list of physical, universal, and natural phenomenon that seem to appear in various forms in all sorts of anime. The original intent was an effort to classify these incidents into a list of "laws" that explained how Anime physics are different from our own (real?) world. It is our hope that you find them useful to studying Anime, or at the very least, worth a good chuckle.

#1 - Law of Metaphysical Irregularity- The normal laws of physics do not apply.

#2 - Law of Differential Gravitation- Whenever someone or something jumps, is thrown, or otherwise is rendered airborne, gravity is reduced by a factor of 4. * Some things have been known to "Float" for a few seconds before plummeting to hit the ground, vehicle, or someone’s cranium.

#3 - Law of Sonic Amplification, First Law of Anime Acoustics- In space, loud sounds, like explosions, are even louder because there is no air to get in the way.

#4 - Law of Constant Thrust, First Law of Anime Motion- In space, constant thrust equals constant velocity.

#5 - Law of Mechanical Mobility, Second Law of Anime Motion- The larger a mechanical device is, the faster it moves, Armoured Mecha are the fastest objects known to human science.

#6 - Law of Temporal Variability- Time is not a constant. Time stops for the hero whenever he does something "cool" or "impressive". Time slows down when friends and lovers are being killed and speeds up whenever there is a fight.

#7 - First Law of Temporal Mortality- "Good Guys" and "Bad Guys" both die in one of two ways - either so quick they don’t even see it coming, OR it’s a long drawn out affair where the character gains much insight to the workings of society, human existence or why the toast always lands butter side down. *NOTE: Sometimes, Anime heroes or villains never really die! In these rare cases they were a clone or cyborg and the real hero/villain’s suspiciously missing in "Malletspace", or something.

#8 - Second Law of Temporal Mortality- It takes some time for bad guys to die... regardless of physical damage. Even when the "Bad Guys" are killed so quickly they don’t even see it coming, it takes them a while to realize they are dead. This is attributed to the belief that being evil damages the Reality Lobe of the brain.

#9 - Law of Dramatic Emphasis- Scenes involving extreme amounts of action are depicted with either still frames or black screens with a slash of bright color (usually red or white).

#10- Law of Dramatic Multiplicity- Scenes that only happen once, for instance, a "Good Guy" kicks the "Bad Guy" in the face, are seen at least 3 times from 3 different angles.

#11- Law of Inherent Combustibility- Everything explodes. Everything. First Corollary- Anything that explodes bulges first. Second Corollary- Large cities are the most explosive substances known to human science. Tokyo in particular seems to be the most unstable of these cities, sometimes referred to as "The Matchstick City".

#12- Law of Phlogistatic Emission- Nearly all things emit light from fatal wounds.

#13- Law of Energetic Emission- There is always an energy build up (commonly referred to as an energy "bulge") before Mecha or space craft weapons fire. Because of the explosive qualities of weapons, it is believed that this is related to the Law of Inherent Combustibility.

#14- Law of Inverse Lethal Magnitude- The destructive potential of any object/organism is inversely proportional to its mass. First Corollary- Small and cute will always overcome big and ugly. Also known as the A-Ko phenomenon.

#15- Law of Inexhaustibility- No one *EVER* runs out of ammunition. That is of course unless they are cornered, out-numbered, out-classed, and unconscious.

#16- Laws of Inverse Accuracy- The accuracy of a "Good Guy" when operating any form of firearm increases as the difficulty of the shot increases. The accuracy of the "Bad Guys" when operating firearms decreases when the difficulty of the shot decreases. (Also known as the Stormtrooper Effect) Example: A "Good Guy" in a drunken stupor being held upside down from a moving vehicle will always hit, and several battalions of "Bad Guys" firing on a "Good Guy" standing alone in the middle of an open field will always miss. First Corollary- The more "Bad Guys" there are, the less likely they will hit anyone or do any real damage. Second Corollary- Whenever a "Good Guy" is faced with insurmountable odds, the "Bad Guys" line up in neat rows, allowing the hero to take them all out with a single burst of automatic fire and then escape. Third Corollary- Whenever a "Good Guy" is actually hit by enemy fire, it is in a designated "Good Guy Area", usually a flesh wound in the shoulder or arm, which restricts the "Good Guy" from doing anything more strenuous than driving, firing weaponry, using melee weapons, operating heavy machinery, or doing complex martial arts maneuvers. *Fourth Corollary- The more times the "Bad Guy" fires, the fewer times he will hit.

#17- Law of Transient Romantic Unreliability- Minimei is a bimbo. (Note: The Minority Opposition in Ohio disagrees and thinks all men who like this stuff needs to get out more.)

#18- Law of Hemoglobin Capacity- the human body contains over 12 gallons of blood, sometimes more, under high pressure.

#19- Law of Demonic Consistency- Demons and other supernatural creatures have at least three eyes, loads of fangs, tend to be yellow-green or brown, but black is not unknown, and can only be hurt by bladed weapons. *Also, acid has been known to work just as well...

#20- Law of Militaristic Unreliability- Huge galaxy-wide armadas, entire armies, and large war machines full of cruel, heartless, bloodthirsty warriors can be stopped and defeated with a single insignificant example of a caring/loving emotion or a song. First Corollary- Whenever a single war machine (mecha, starship, etc.) goes up against an entire army, the army always loses.

#21- Law of Tactical Unreliability- Tactical geniuses aren’t...

#22 -Law of Inconsequential Undetectability- People never notice the little things... like missing body parts, or wounds the size of Seattle.

#23- Law of Juvenile Intellectuality- Children are smarter than adults. And almost twice as annoying.

#24- Law of Americanthromorphism- Americans in Anime appear in one of two roles, either as a really nasty skinny "Bad Guy" or a big stupid "Good Guy". First Corollary- The only people who are more stupid than the big dumb Americans are the American translators. (Sometimes referred to as the Green Line Effect) Second Corollary- The only people who are more stupid than the American translators are the American editors and censors. *Third Corollary- Canadians are usually portrayed as smart, strong, handsome "Good Guys".

#25- Law of Mandibular Proportionality- The size of a person’s mouth is directly proportional to the volume at which they are speaking or eating.

#26- Law of Feline Mutation- Any half-cat/half-human mutation will invariably: 1) be female. 2) will possess ears and sometimes a tail as a genetic mutation. 3) wear as little clothing as possible, if any.

#27- Law of Conservation of Firepower- Any powerful weapon capable of destroying/defeating an opponent in a single shot will invariably be reserved and used as a last resort.

#28- Law of Technological User-Benevolence- The formal training required to operate a spaceship or mecha is inversely proportional to its complexity.

#29- Law of Melee Luminescence- Any being displaying extremely high levels of martial arts prowess and/or violent emotions emits light in the form of a glowing aura. This aura is usually blue for "Good Guys" and red for "Bad Guys". This is attributed to Good being higher in the electromagnetic spectrum than Evil.

#30- Law of Non-Anthropomorphic Antagonism- All ugly, non-humanoid alien races are hostile, and usually hell-bent on destroying humanity for some obscure reason.

#31- Law of Follicular Chromatic Variability- Any color in the visible spectrum is considered a natural hair color. This color can change without warning or explanation.

#32- Law of Follicular Permanence- Hair in anime is pretty much indestructible, and can resist any amount of meteorological conditions, energy emissions, physical abuse, or explosive effects and still look perfect. The only way to hurt someone’s hair is the same way you deal with demons... with bladed weapons!

#34- Law of Probable Attire- Clothing in anime follows certain predictable guidelines: Female characters wear as little clothing as possible, regardless of whether it is socially or meteorologicallyappropriate. Any female with an excessive amount of clothing will invariably have her clothes ripped to shreds or torn off somehow. If there is no opportunity to tear off aforementioned female’s clothes, then she will inexplicably take a shower for no apparent reason (also known as the Gratuitous Shower Scene). Whenever there is a headwind, Male characters invariably wear long cloaks that don’t hamper movement and billow out dramatically behind them. First Corollary (Cryo-Adaptability)- All anime characters are resistant to extremely cold temperatures, and do not need to wear heavy or warm clothing in snow. Second Corollary (Indecent Invulnerability)- Bikinis render the wearer invulnerable to any form of damage. *Third Corollary (Probable Attire permanence)- The clothing on the hero is indestructible. Their capes, robes, (and if they are girls,) skirts, dresses, bows, or any loose clothing will just flap when they are in the middle of a fire or ice attack... Unless it's a hentai. It is believed that the clothes are made out of Anime Character hair. (re. Laws 32 & 48)

#35- Law of Musical Omnipotence- Any character capable of musical talent (singing, playing an instrument, etc. Is automatically capable of doing much more "simple" things, like piloting mecha, fighting crime, stopping an intergalactic war, and so on... especially if they’ve never attempted these things before.

#36- Law of QuintupularAgglutination- Also called "The Five-man Rule", when "Good Guys" group together, it tends to be in groups of five. There are five basic positions, which are: 1) The Hero/Leader 2) His Girlfriend 3) His Best Friend/Rival 4) A Hulking Brute 5) A Dwarf/Kid Between these basic positions are distributed several attributes, which include: 1) Extreme Coolness 2) Amazing Intelligence 3) Incredible Irritation

#37- Law of Extradimensional Capacitance- All anime females have an extrasdimensional storage space of variable volume somewhere on their person from which they can instantly retrieve any object at a moment’s notice. This mysterious dimension is commonly called "Malletspace". First Corollary (AKA The Hammer Rule)- The most common item stored is a heavy mallet, costumes/uniforms, power suits/armor, and large bazookas.

#38- Law of Hydrostatic Emission- Eyes tend to be rather large in Anime. This is because they contain several gallons of water, which may be instantaneously released at high pressure through large tear ducts. The actual volume of water contained in the eyes is unknown, as there is no evidence to suggest that these reservoirs are actually capable of running out. The reason water tends to collect in the eyes is because Anime characters only have one large sweat gland, which is located at the back of the head. When extremely stressed , embarrassed, or worried, this sweat gland exudes a single but very large drop of sebaceous fluid.

#39- Law of Inverse Attraction- Success at finding suitable mates is inversely proportionate to how desperately you want to be successful. The more you want, the less you get and vice-versa. First Corollary- Unfortunately, this law seems to apply to Otaku in the real world...

#40- Law of Nasal Sanguination- When sexually aroused, males in Anime don’t get erections, they get nosebleeds. No one’s sure why this is, though... the current theory suggests that larger eyes means smaller sinuses and thinner sinus tissue (see Law #38 above). Females don’t get nosebleeds, but invariably get one heck of a blush along the cheeks and across the nose, suggesting a lot of bloodflow to that region.

#41- Law of Xylolaceration- Wooden or bamboo swords are just as sharp as metal swords, if not sharper.

#42- Law of Juvenile Omnipotence- Always send a boy to do a man’s job. He’ll get it done in half the time and twice the angst.

#43- Law of Triscaquadrodecophobia- There is no Law #43.

#44- Law of Nominative Clamovocation- the likelihood of success and damage done by a martial arts attack is directly proportional to the volume at which the full name of the attack is announced (known as the Kamehameha effect).

#45- Law of Uninteruptable Metamorphosis- Regardless of how long or involved the transformation sequence or how many times they’ve seen it before, any "Bad Guys" witnessing a mecha/hero/heroine transforming are too stunned to do anything to interrupt it.

#46- Law of Flimsy Incognition- Simply changing into a costume or wearing a teensy mask can make you utterly unrecognizable to even your closest friends and relatives.

#47- Law of Mandibular Combustible Emission- All anime characters seem to have some unknown chemical on their breath that reacts VERY violently with extremely hot or spicy food. This chemical may also be responsible for the phenomenon of fire behind the eyes and from the mouth when a character (usually a female) is really angry.

#48- Law of Electrical and Combustible Survivalism- If you get electrocuted or burned, YOU WILL SURVIVE!! Though your entire body will be scorched, seconds later, your skin won’t have a trace of damage (Also known as the "Pikachu Effect"). First Corollary- When a magical bad guy/Alien/monster fires off a flame, wind, or ice attack, the resulting effect is only enough for the hero(es)/heroine(s) to be standing in the "Walking Against the Wind" stance, with his/her eyes shut and letting out a pathetic "Aaaaagh!", and yet they are never harmed. This may be in part to laws 32, 34 and sometimes 44.

#49- Law of Female wrath- If a male character insults a female character, he will get a mallet, shotgun, or tank blast, or if she is a character that can perform magical feats, a fireball or whatever, to the head, body or whatever (Also known as the "Lina Inverse/Gourry Factor") This is because he always deserves it, and will help him to cope in today’s society. (Sniff Sniff

#50- Law of Artistic Perversion- Most (not all) Anime artists are perverts and are under the impression that girls are willing to tear off their clothes, or wear VERY small, revealing outfits at the drop of a pin (or pen for that matter). Unfortunately, most Hentai fans are under the same impression.

#51- Law of Uninteruptable Nominative Clamovocation- This law is a mixture of Laws 44 and 45. Regardless of how long or involved the Spell or projectile attack is, and the likelihood of success and damage done by the volume at which the full name of the attack is announced, or how many times they’ve seen it before, any "Bad Guys" witnessing a hero/heroine quoting the incantations for an extremely powerful attack are too stunned to do anything to interrupt it. (Also known as the "Dragon Slave Phenomenon")

52- Law of Telepathic Obliviousness- Most of the time, some Anime characters (usually males) will think personal (Like that he/she has sabotaged something), or perverted thoughts, while near some other character, WHO’S TELEPATHIC!! The reasons for this are: 1) They forgot that the person is telepathic. 2) They just don’t give a damn. The reasons the telepathic person doesn’t react are: 1) They’re preoccupied with doing something else. 2) They’d rather keep the fact to themselves that they are Telepathic. 3) They just don’t give a damn.

#53- Law of Chromatic Diversity- Air can be any color of the viewable spectrum.

#54- Law of Old Man Comic Relief- Comic relief comes in the form of a short, bald, wise-mouthed dirty old man or alien. Or the combination of any two of those traits. First Corollary- If old man is present, and is acting too horny, stupid, etc., there will invariably be an old woman to whap him over the head with a frying pan or something.

#55- Law of the Wise Old Man- Little old Japanese men always know how it ends and withhold the ending from anyone, especially the hero. This includes special power weapons, ancient relics, and people who know everything.

#56- Law of Omnipotent Unreliability- Any "Bad Guy" with Omnipotent powers/weapons will never use those powers/weapons against the "Good Guy" until it is too late. First Corollary- All "Bad Guys" suffer from Antagonistic Boasting Syndrome which require all "Bad Guys" to threaten with or exemplify their prowess and not use it against the "Good Guy". Second Corollary- No "Bad Guy" may use any new, secret, or superior military device without one of the following events occurring: a) The control device being broken. The control device being taken by the "Good Guy". c) The control device is in fact not the real device at all and was just "fooled" by the "Good Guy". d) The "Bad Guy" has already lost and cannot use the device.

#57- Law of Minimum Corneal Volume- Eyeballs may make up no less than one sixth of the face’s total surface area. More so if the case is a blonde woman.

#58- Law of Electrical Charges in Hair- Hair attracts electricity in abundance, resulting in two outcomes: a) A positive charge will result in the spikes-flying-everywhere-behind-me look. A negative charge will result in the hair-cascading-down-to-the-waist-in-a-single-sheet look.

#59- Law of Ammunition Accuracy- When there are multiple types of ammunition available (paintballs, speaker pods), non-lethal rounds will always be more accurate when compared to "standard" or lethal shots. (Macross Plus for paintballs, Macross 7 for speaker pods)

#60- Law of Active Female Attraction- In a comedy series, a male character’s attractiveness to women is inversely proportional to how active they pursue them. (Tenchi, Ranma, and Makoto [OVA] have a seemingly endless supply of willing girlfriends despite their lack of romantic skill while Happosai, Ataru, and Carrot couldn’t get a date despite [or because of] their constant attempts.)

#61- Law of Sweat Pore Variability- When a person is embarrassed, caught in an awkward situation, or otherwise humiliated, all sweat pores on the body contract, except for ones on the forehead. These pores expand to such a degree that a single drop could fill a Big Gulp from 7-11.

#62- The Law of Inverse Training Time- A person who has been training for 3 years is never as good as someone who has been training for one month.

#63- Law of Needs to Few and Many- The needs of the many, outweigh the needs of the few... of even the one.

#64- Law of Bad Humor- Whenever someone says something that is intended to be funny, whether actually funny or not, the rest of the characters (even animals) fall to the ground with their feet in the air. Sweat sometimes accompanies the fall. *(The sound of a cow mooing usually accompanies the joke as well.)

#65- Law of Extreme Anger- Whenever a female character gets mad, such as seeing the male character with another girl, she becomes extremely strong (despite her usually helpless look) so that she can lift a 1000 ton object to hurt the guy. She can sometimes perform other punishments that are just as cruel such as pinching the guy’s face so hard that it changes shape. *(see law #49)

#66- Law of Differentiated Gravitation- First Corollary- If the airborne entity exceeds an altitude equal or greater than two times the height of the entity, gravity is decreased by an inverse coefficient relative to the upward momentum and mass/weight (if within at least 500 km of any gravity source) of the entity "jumping". Second Corollary- The amount of Newtonian "opposite force" (in accordance to normal downward velocity; "Earth gravity" speed is equal to 32ft/sec/sec) is also inversely proportional to the "actual" speed of the airborne entity. In all actuality, an entity that appears to be flying towards a solid concrete parking lot from space will actually land, producing an opposite force of approximately 1.73 lb. of pressure. Unless this particular entity is a "Bad Guy". Then the law exhibits a mysterious exponentially proportional Newtonian opposite force, thusly increasing this variable by a factor equal to the inverse-gravity potential.

#67- Law of Conservation of Ambient Dramatic Tension- In any situation where the Ambient Dramatic Tension increases, the "Good Guy’s" Style Coefficient must be increased by a proportional amount to compensate. In any situation where this does not happen, the "Bad Guy" inevitably comes out on top. However, this usually leads to a further rise in the Ambient Dramatic tension, which will *always* be offset by an exponential increase in the "Good Guy’s" Style Coefficient.

#68- Law of Coercive Vehicular Control- No matter how complex or well defined the control system, a character controlling a vehicle of any sort always does so through means of undetectable subconscious psychokinesis. First Corollary- Characters can perform actions with their vehicles which clearly defy normal physics (see Laws of Metaphysical Irregularity and Constant Thrust). The velocity, attitude and traction of the vehicle appear to be adjusted at will, with the degree of absolute control being proportional to the complexity and lethality of the maneuver. Second Corollary- It is effectively impossible to remove characters from or disrupt the passage of their vehicles without the character’s consent. This does not always apply to "Bad Guy" characters, or "Good Guy" characters in situations where the Ambient Dramatic Tension could increase in accordance with the Law of Conservation of Ambient Dramatic Tension.

#69- Amendment to the Law of Conservation of Ambient Dramatic Tension- In any situation where the Ambient Dramatic Tension increases without a corresponding increase in the "Good Guy’s" Style Coefficient, not only does the "Bad Guy" usually come out on top, but also his Smugness Factor increases in proportion to the rise in Ambient Dramatic Tension.

#70- Law of The Rushing Background Effect- Whenever something dramatic occurs, a survival instinct engages, thus rendering all incoming stimulus that is not directly and immediately to the dramatic situation at hand a meaningless blur. This is often referred to as "The Rushing Background Effect". Due to the increase in brain activity and adrenaline levels in the bloodstream, the scene is often played out in slow motion.

#71- Law of Inter dimensional Hammers- Whenever a female character witnesses a male character of her preference performing any sort of questionable act (i.e. Looking at another girl or anything she might construe as perverted) she can reach into an inter dimensional realm (usually behind her back) and withdraw a huge Anime Mallet of Doom with which to whack the said male over the head with. *(see Laws # 37, 49, and 65)

#72- Law of Instant Band-Aids- Whenever a character is injured (usually in a head shot, maybe from a mallet whack) Band-Aids will always instantly appear on the wounded individual (and always in pairs, set in a cross fashion). These bandages will then, most likely, disappear by the character’s next scene.

#73- Law of Universal Edge Defense- Any projectile attack, from a blast of magic to a hail of bullets, can be easily defended against by holding a suitably cool-looking sword or other bladed weapon between the attacker and defender, usually so that the edge cuts into the incoming attack(s), causing both halves to go flying harmlessly past the defender. Observed most often in fantasy and martial arts anime.

#74- Law of Intractable Sanity- There is no such thing as insanity in anime. When faced with horrifying supernatural forces that would drive most men mad, anime characters will either: a) Die quickly (but in accordance with all other laws [e.g., slowdown and exposition]), Get possessed by them, especially if they are beautiful girls or men in a position to ravish beautiful girls, or c) Kill them, wipe the blood off their blades, and walk on whistling.

#75- Law of Celestial Body Control- At a dramatically correct moment, a hero can summon a sun/moon/halo to appear behind him/her to cause a dramatic silhouette.

#76- Law of Aura of Forgetfulness- Any hero who wishes his/her identity to remain a secret will invariably succeed regardless of disguise because everyone around him/her will forget everything. Otherwise, how does Sailor Moon keep her disguise?

#77- Law of Cool Hair Factor- The hair of a hero will always coalesce into thick strands that drape his face into a dramatic fashion, regardless of wind, the elements, etc. *(see Laws 32 & 48)

#78- Law of Inverse Coping- Any single event will happen to the ONE character LEAST capable of dealing with it.

#79- Law of Martial Arts Training Invulnerability- The Myth that certain martial arts will enable you to become so strong, that you can stop a nuclear warhead with your bare palm. Unfortunately, for most otaku, they found the hard way that it just doesn’t work in real life...

#80- Law of Stereotype Captain characteristics- If a captain of any type of ship is male, he will invariably wear a big captain’s cap, a long overcoat, and have a shaggy beard and mustache (pipe optional), and be a great tactician. If the captain is female, however, she will invariably be young, well endowed, and ditzy as a pole (horny father optional). Yet, she too will be a great tactician.

#81- Law of Shades/Coolness Factor- Shades can make you instantly cool, even if you’re normally a klutz.

#82- Law of Hentai Plot- The proper response to any change in the plotline of a Hentai anime is to start having sex.

#83- Law of Understatement- Anything that is deemed too impossible will become possible. First Corollary- Any "Bad Guy" stating "T-that’s impossible!" whenever the hero is accomplishing some new feat/move/projectile will find out too late that he is wrong and will invariably be toastied.

#84- Law of Dormant Powers- Anytime a hero is somehow outpowered and/or outclassed by the villain, he will invariably release powers/new moves he never knew he could accomplish... but his old teacher did!

#85- Law of Style Coefficient- In a situation where a Good guy may be in dire straits, he will become stronger, smarter and more cool in a matter of seconds. (see Laws #67, 69, and 84)

#86- Law of Bad Guy Smugness Factor- Whenever the villain actually succeeds in beating the hero, they will begin to gloat uncontrollably, because they’ve never won against the "Good Guy" (because they’re Eeeviiil!!). They usually get so cocky, they tie the hero to a conveyor belt leading to his doom and leave to get a snack. Usually this results in: a) The hero escaping. Clean-up for the underlings. c) The villain getting toasted.

#87- Law of Tableware Nonexistence- There IS no spoon.

#88- Law of Goofy Turn-Ons- In Hentai, ordinary , pedestrian objects sometimes have the magical power of either inducing orgasm or arousal. Some include warm water, rolling on a smooth tabletop, wind, mild electrocution, the character toweling themselves after a bath/shower, and very cold objects... like bottles of 7-up.

#89- Law of Penile Variance- All Anime men in Hentai have a ridiculously large penis (lengths of 8, 9, 10 and 11 inches are most common). Some even have ones the size of telephone poles, despite the blood loss that would accompany it...

#90-Law of Hentai Female Characteristics- All Hentai women have the following characteristics: 1) Very sensitive and/or very large breasts with large nipples. 2) Very tight and/or sensitive vaginas.

#91- Law of Vaginal Variance- Hentai Anime women can take penis lengths of 8" and up... completely... despite the fact that they might have tight and/or sensitive vagina.

#92- Law of Hero Identification- All heroes are introduced by way of appearance while someone talking about their (in)famous-ness, or by way of a voice-over of them introducing themselves.

#93- Law of Cute Mascots- Any anime either Shojo or Shonen has GOT to have at least one cute, furry little mascot by penalty of death! First Corollary- If it is a Shonen Anime, the hero will be accompanied by a Dog, Cat or any kind of animal, real or fake, that would be found with a hero of the male persuasion. Any animal that would be associated with girls that is following him around is there because: 1) It’s his girlfriend’s. 2) It is following him, despite his insistence not to do so. 3) Chicks will dig him more. Second Corollary- If it is a Shojo Anime, the heroine will be accompanied by a cat, cute lil’ mouse, or some disgustingly cute monster, or any kind of animal, real or fake, that would be found with a hero of the female persuasion. Any animal that would be associated with guys that is following her around is there because: 1) It’s her boyfriend’s. 2) It is following her, despite her insistence not to do so. 3) It makes her look cool.

#94- Law of The Force- Most Anime heroes are blessed with a unique sort of ability that enables bad things to happen to those that deserve it or makes things like bullets or debris totally miss them (Also referred to as "Dumb Luck"), even though they are mostly unaware of it. Those who have this ability include Vash the Stampede, Captain Justy Ueki Tylor, and Jar Jar Binks.

#95- Law of Naughty Tentacles- All Anime Tentacles are VERY horny and will rape any human female, regardless of age ("She’s 18! No! Really, she is! I’m not lying!...") First Corollary- Even when raped or molested by tentacles, Hentai Anime girls eventually get into it & begin squealing in ecstasy. NO one knows WHY this is, but some theorize there may be some kind of chemical that is secreted through the skin of the tentacle... Second Corollary- Women who are impregnated by a tentacle creature never experience morning sickness, and also find it to be intensely pleasurable (Also known as the Goofy Meter Redline Effect). Third Corollary- Similarly, the resulting... offspring of tentacle/human relations is immediately sexually active, often impregnating its own mother again.

#96- Law of Cat-Fighting- Two females with a grudge can and will go at each other, sometimes ripping off clothes. Sometimes it escalates so much, that property damage begins to occur. First Corollary- A running fight can be so destructive, you can follow it from a distance just by watching for the smoke. (Also known as the "A-ko/B-ko Thing")

#97- Law of Healing- Most anime heroes have a Wolverine-like healing factor that enables them to regenerate from a massive wound or broken bone within minutes. Being immortal sometimes helps. (Also known as the "Priss Effect".)

#98- Law of Stereotype Crew Characteristics- All ships, either waterborne or spaceborne, have the following crew members: 1) The captain 2) His Lieutenant 3) Various female technical staff 4) A hotshot pilot 5) A cute little girl/twins (either stowaways or not) 6) The Doctor 7) The Doctor’s assistant (either a spy or not) Weighted among the crew are various quirks which include: 1) Extreme coolness/luck 2) Amazing Intelligence 3) Incredible irritation 4) Extreme cuteness 5) Irresponsible drunkenness 6) Homophobicness 7) Emotionless (Idiots.)

#99- Law of Sparklies- Whenever a character of the main character’s interest appears, flowers, sparkles, or abstract circles of pastel colors appear around said character, or both. Roses with exaggerated thorns appear when it is dangerous love. No one knows why this is, though most have a theory: Anime characters are freaks! At least, Marker Apenname seems to think so...

#100- Law of Anime Events- Much like wrestling, anything and everything can happen.