Baz lives in every AU. Maybe. (Starting from "The Fifth Hare," in Rainbow Rowell's Fangirl.) Warnings: a little meta, a little crack, and a lot of sad. This story is all madamewhitecake's fault.

It's an unreasonably hot day at Watford, what are you gonna do? "Finally Simon said, 'That's it,' heaved himself off his bed, and started to undo the buttons on his shirt. ... Baz sounded indignant. 'This isn't a strip club, Snow. Show a little decorum.' Simon turned his head and tried a smirk. 'You're lucky I'm keeping my trousers on.'" Flirting, fluff, and SnowBaz.

"Baz is being followed. It's dark in the catacombs under Watford, of course, pitch dark even, ha bloody ha, but that's never a problem for Baz. Vampires can see in the dark. Not to mention smell. And no one else smells quite like Simon Snow." ** SnowBaz, starting from the canon Simon Snow and the Five Blades excerpt in Fangirl (hardcover p. 127).

Baz has technical difficulties, and Simon shows off just a bit. * Follows "Family & Secrets," seventh year I suppose?, established relationship; just some brief fluff. * SnowBaz