"Those wacky Brits called fries 'chips'. And potato chips were 'crisps'. And cookies were 'biscuits'. I had no idea what real biscuits were called. Wangdoodles?"-Max

"The time for lovers is just beginning, you know! We can go for a romantic dinner, a moonlight stroll in the park, and after that the main EVENT! " -Misa Amane, Death Note

"Humans are fucked up." -Ryuk, Death N

There’s a fine line between the sane and the insane… -Sondra Pierce

She claimed him by tossing him a biscuit and smacking him with a newspaper when he was disobedient. -How to catch a man guide.

Monsters are real. And ghosts are real too, they live inside us; and sometimes, they win. -Stephen King

FORMERLY EternalTearsOfBlood

Name: Alicia

But you can call me: Alicia, Alice, Ali, Cheshire, CT, CheshireTears, or whatever floats your fancy

I mostly write on fictionpress, so check that out too! My penname is also CheshireTears

Here's some useless info about me you probably couldn't care less about:

I probably won't update too often. Honestly, I've had this for a few years, and as you can see, I'm a procrastinator. I put stuff up years ago that I probably won't finish. But I'm working on it! So please don't give up on me!

I will periodically post new works. As you may see, I mostly post stand-alone works, but occasionally inspiration hits me and I will upload a new chapter fic. Good luck on those, though, because I won't lie and pretend that I keep up with those. They generally don't make it past the first chapter.

I have far too many favorite books, animes and TV shows.

Speaking of which, I also absolutely LOVE cosplay! I'm trying to get more serious about it, but for now, I'm kind of amateurish. But check out my DeviantArt (onyxrubies) where I shall be posting my cosplay stuff after it gets off my camera, as well as some of the same works you can find here. And if you're a fan of Death Note or Kuroshitsuji/Black Butler, I suggest you check out this amazingly awesome cosplay group called TouchMyMafia (old group, mostly Death Note) and DeathGodMilitia (new group, more Kuro!) They are fucking hilarious!

I am a singer, and an amatuer guitarist. (I've been teaching myself the rudimentary basics for the past three years.) Check out my YouTube: TNBCvampchic

I have an immense vocabulary, but the sad part is that I'm not ALWAYS correct in my spelling, though I am about 99 percent of the time. I am also obsessive about grammar, which has shaped my writing style.

Also check out my Tumblr! I have practically moved into there and set up an eclectic little home in my dashboard. You can also find me under CheshireTears there.

That's all I can think of for now.

DON'T FORGET TO REVIEW! I love when you add me, but don't forget to REVIEW too! Your reviews make me smile. And give me the warm fangirlies.

The 27 Commandments
of Writing a Fanfic

1. Thou shalt not post a fic until it has been checked for grammar and spelling errors. The fanfiction gods hath given you a spellchecker on the computer for good reason. Use it.

2.Thou shalt not post a chapter of less than 100 words, unless it is a drabble. This displeases the masses.

3.Thou shalt not put author's notes in the middle of the story.

4.Thou shalt NEVER use text-speak in a fic, unless the characters are actually texting.

5.Thou shalt keep to one tense, and only one, throughout the story. Do not switch randomly.

6.Apply the above number 5 to POVs as well.

7. Thou shalt not get offended when someone makes fun of the crack pairing featured in your fanfiction. It probably is rather hilarious.

8.Thou shalt not use , ;, or :( in a fanfiction to show the emotion exhibited by a character.

9.Thou shall try-eth to keep characters in character!

10.Thou shall not treat every criticism as a flame.

11.The author's note is not a spot for your personal drama, and thou shalt not make it so.

12.Thou shalt not put any form of the phrase "first fic" in thy summary.

13. Thy created characters must not have names that exceed five syllables in length. Nor shall thy name have more than five words in length.

14. Thou shall not insert thyself into the story line as thyself or as a character- yes we know that you are in love with yourself and are very narcissistic, we just don’t want to read about how you end up with the main character.

15.If thou art writing a story that does not follow the original story line, point it out in the beginning.

16.Thou shall not make a person randomly smart or powerful unless stating a reason for the change (a good reason).

17.Thou shalt show and not tell.

18.Thou shalt not EVER use the phrase "I suck at summaries" in-est thine summary. This annoys thine readers.

19.Thou shalt not write the same way thou speak-est- writing is an art.

20.Thou shalt ALWAYS spell the word "okay" correctly. Using the letter "K" is an unacceptable compromise.

21. Thou shalt only use clichés when thou a) art writing a parody or b) find a new and interesting twist to make such clichés bearable to thine reader.

22. Thou shalt always separate dialogue from two separate speakers in two separate paragraphs. Otherwise thine readers shalt be confuse-ed.

23. Thou shalt not EVER make a chapter all one paragraph. THIS INFURIATES BOTH THINE READER AND THE FANFICTION GODS. They have given thee an ENTER key with good reason.

24. Thou shalt not write with thy caps lock on, it displeases the masses and causes thy readers to lose their vision and make angels weep.

25. Thou shalt know how to spell the character's names correctly before you writeth the fic. Misspelling the name of the main characters makes readers angry and distracts from the story.

26. Thou shalt not say in thine summary "summary inside". This shows lack of creativeness and infuriates the masses. The only exception is when a summary is cut short and a continuation of it lies inside.

27. Thou shall use paragraphs and space the story so it is not terrifyingly daunting to thine readers.

YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF...

You talk to yourself a lot.

You talk to yourself about talking to yourself. (e.g. 'Why do I constantly ask my self random things?')

When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else. (e.g. 'Have you ever noticed that deliver could mean someones liver?')

After uttering a profound peice of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, 'Holy crap, this stuff is great for sugar highs...'

You live off of sugar and caffeine (the two greatest things ever discovered!)

You'll check your e-mail every day of the week and then disappear off the face of the earth.

You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.

When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.

No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.

The letters on your keyboard are wearing off.

People think you have A.D.D.

You think it'd be cool to have A.D.D.

You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.

You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason

Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.

And FINALLY, the one way to tell if you're a good writer: You failed English 101.