~Hallo thar! i'm Starry Eye (female). My avatar is a picture of my eye, which is how I got my nickname. (I flashed myself in the eye trying to take that picture. ow.)

Guy or Girl test

You love hoodies
You love jeans.
Dogs are better than cats.
It's hilarious when people get hurt. (sometimes)
You've played with/against boys on a team.
Shopping is torture.
Sad movies suck.
You own/ed an X-Box.
Played with Hotwheels cars as a kid.
At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter
You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.
You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
You watch sports on TV.
Gory movies are cool.
You go to your dad for advice.
You own like a trillion baseball caps.
You like going to high school football games.
You used to/do collect football/baseball cards.
Baggy pants are cool to wear.
It's kind of weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people. Green, black, red, blue or silver are one of your favorite colors. (black and red!)
You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
Sports are fun.
Talk with food in your mouth.
Sleep with your socks on at night.

TOTAL: 14

YOUR GIRL SIDE:
You wear lip gloss/stick.
You love skirts
Cats are better than dogs.
You love to shop.
You wear eyeliner.
You wear the color pink.
Go to your mom for advice.
Pink, yellow, orange, purple or gold is one of your favorite colors.
You hate wearing the colour black
You like hanging out at the shopping center.
You like getting manicures and/or pedicures. You like wearing jewelry.
You don't like the movie Star Wars.
You were in gymnastics/dance.
It takes you around/ more one hour to shower, get dressed and make-up.
You smile a lot more than you should.
You have more than 10 pairs of shoes
You care about what you look like.
You like wearing dresses when you can.
You like wearing body perfume.
You love the movies.
Used to play with dolls as little kid.
Like being the star of everything.

TOTAL:4

I'm female...

An Ode To My Mom whom i am very close too

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of
next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the
store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12.My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't
have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that
way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

FRIENDS: never ask anything to eat or drink

BEST FRIENDS: Help themselves and is the reason you never have any food

FREINDS: Call your parents Mr. Mrs. and grandma and grandpa

BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents MOM and DAD GRAMS AND GRAMPS

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail at 2 A.M

BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you saying "DAMN we really messed up!"

FRIENDS: Never seen you cry

BEST FRIENDS: Won’t tell anyone else you cry... just laugh about it when you’re not down anymore

FRIENDS: Ask you to write down you number

BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff and gives it back a few days later

BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad ... Here’s a tissue"

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you

BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography about your life

FREINDS: Will leave you behind if that’s what everyone else is doing

BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowd asses that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door

BEST FRIENDS: Would walk right in and say ,"IM HOME what we having for diner?"

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell

BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell

FRIENDS: Are through high school /college (drinking buddies)

BEST FRIENDS: Are for life

FRIENDS: ask you why you're crying

BEST FRIENDS: already have a shovel ready to bury the loser that made you cry

FRIENDS: would say "He wasn't good for you"

BEST FRIENDS: would walk up to the person who broke your heart and yell at the top of there lungs "IT'S BECAUSE YOUR GAY ITSN'T IT!!"

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away when they think you’ve had enough

BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say, “drink the rest of that, you know we don’t waste”

FREINDS: Will ignore this

BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this shit

REAL NAME: Not telling. Call me Starry

2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME:(first 3 letters of real name plus izzle): Sohizzle

3. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (fav color and fav animal): Red Dragon

4. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, and current street name): Kaur Murphy (well, that is a crappy name...)

5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, last 3 letters of mom's maiden name): Dhisowal

6. YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink): Black Cha

7. YOUR ARAB NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your moms maidenname, 3rd letter of you dads middle name, 1st letter of a siblings first name, last letter of your moms middle name): Oikunpl

8. YOUR GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one your pets): black rani

9. YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: ?

10. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (something bad, favorite fruit): Murderous Pineapple

11. YOUR PIRATE NAME: (third favorite color, pirate accessory): Purple Patch

This is the stupid test! 100 stupid things that people do

1. Forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out
2. Gotten your head stuck between the stair rails 3. Broken a chair by leaning back in it
4. Had gum fall out of your mouth while you were talking
5. Choked on your own spit while you were talking
6. Had people tell you that you are blonde when you're not/or had had people tell you that your blonde highlights are going to your head
7. Been caught staring at your crush by your crush him/herself
8. Have looked for something for at least 10 min then realized it was in your hand
9. Tried to push open a door that said pull
10. Tried to pull open a door that said push
11. Have actually believed someone when they said that they knew how to make a love potion
12. Have hit yourself in the process of trying to hit something else
13. Have tripped and fallen UP the stairs
14. Have actually exploded marshmallows in the microwave
15. Have gotten gum stuck in your hair
16. Had gum fall out of your mouth while trying to blow a bubble
17. Have had the juice from a mini tomato squirt out and hit somebody else when you bit into it
18. Have had your drink come out your nose because you were laughing so hard
19. Have called one of your good friends by the wrong name
20. Have skinned your toe because you were playing soccer or kickball with flip flops on or you were barefoot
21. Have put a sticker on your forehead, forgot it was there, and went out in public with it on
22. Have fallen out of a moving vehicle.
23. Have run into a closed door
24. Have almost shot someone with a real gun while trying to shoot something else
25. Searched for your cell phone while you were talking on it
26. It has taken you longer than 5 min to get a joke
27. Have gotten your hair stuck in a blow dryer
28. Have gotten your hair stuck in a fan
29. Tripped on a crack in the sidewalk
30. Said o'clock after saying how many min after the hour, example: 5:30 o'clock, or 6:15 o'clock
31. After someone told you that there was gum on the ground, you stepped in it
32. Put on a white shirt even though you already knew it was raining outside
33. Have ever walked up to a stranger because you thought they were someone else
34. Ever been kicked out of a grocery store/off their property
35. Touched the stove, the curling iron, a hot pan, etc on purpose even though you knew it was hot
36. Picked out your change of clothes, took off the ones you had on and then accidentally put the old clothes back on
37. Wondered why something wasn't working then realized it wasn't plugged in
38. Put the cereal in the fridge, or put the milk in the cupboard
39. Walked into a pole
40. Wore two different earrings or shoes by accident
41. Put your shirt on backwards/inside-out without realizing it then left your house
42. Tried to take a picture of your/someone's eye with the flash on (see my avatar? yeah.)
43. Gotten a ring stuck on your finger because you put it on even though you knew it was too small
44. Walked out of the bathroom with toilet paper stuck to your shoe without realizing it
45. Went to go do something/go get something, then when you got there forgot what is was that you were going to do.
46. Picked up someone else's drink and drank out of it by accident when your drink was right next to it
47. Fallen out of your chair while trying to pick something up
48. Have poked yourself in the eye
49. Have gotten in the shower with your socks still on
50. Melted your hairbrush while blow drying your hair,
51. Have done enough stupid things to make a test
52. Have accidentally stabbed yourself with a pencil
53. Have sung the wrong verse to a song without realizing it
54. Have given an odd answer to a question because you didn't hear the question in the first place and didn't feel like asking what it was.
55. Told someone you were the wrong age because you seriously forgot how old you were
56. Looked into an overhead light purposefully while it was on
57. Got up early and got ready for school/work/meeting, then realized that you didn't have school/work/meeting that day.
58. Have tripped on a cord after someone told you to watch out for it
60. Have ever laughed at a joke that no one else thought was funny or a movie
61. Done the Macarena to the electric slide or vice versa
62. Said funner, then had someone make fun of you for it
63. Have repeated yourself at least twice in the same sentence
64. Brought up an inside joke with the wrong person
65. Didn't do the backside of an assignment because you thought that there wasn't one because you had already looked and forgot that there was another side
66. Did more work than you had to on an assignment because you didn't read the directions
67. Corrected someone's grammar/pronunciation then figured out that you were the one that was wrong
68. Put something in a special place so that you would remember where it was, then forgot where you put it
69. Put ice in your drink after the glass was full of liquid and had it splash out-
70. Told a lie then forgot what it was that you had said and got caught
71. When wearing goggles, you pulled them away from your face and let go so that they would come back and snap you in the face
72. Forgot to make sure that the lamp was off before you replaced the light bulb
73. Ran into a door jam
74. Told someone that you hardly ever do stupid things, then immediately did/said something stupid
75. Told someone to watch out for something, then you were the one that ran into it
76. Have purposely licked playground sand
77. Have purposely and repeatedly flicked yourself with a rubber band
78. Gotten so hyper that someone actually thought you were drunk when you weren't
79. Have been so hyper you actually scared people
80. Put duct tape on your body then pulled it off to see if it would pull your hairs out
81. Put duct tape on your hair/someone else's hair then pulled it off
82. Put a clothes pin/hair clip on your lip, figured out that it hurt, then did it again
83. Sat and wondered why men’s dress shirts have a loop on the back.
84. Made up a code name for someone so that you could talk about them to someone else and no one else would know who you were talking about
85. Have gotten a hairbrush stuck in your hair
86. Used the straw to blow the straw wrapper at someone
87. Shaved your tongue because you thought your taste buds looked weird
88. When at a restaurant/cafeteria, you used your spoon to fling stuff at people
89. Have flung forks at people in a restaurant/cafeteria
90. Sucked on a cup and got a hickey from it.
91. As you were writing, you moved your head back and forth with your pen/pencil
92. Have drawn finger puppets on your fingers then named them
93. Have wrapped someone in a roll of toilet paper
94. Have used somebody else's toothbrush without even realizing it wasn't yours
95. Started telling a story and forget what you were talking about or what happened in the story
96. When you saw a ‘beware of dog’ sign, you told the owners to beware of the dogs not realizing they owned the dogs
97. You have spelled your own name wrong before
98. When lying in bed you look for pictures in the texture of the ceiling.
99. Have used your calculator as a form of communication in class
100. Have popped a balloon in your mouth

MAXIMUM RIDE FAN QUESTIONS:

1. Do you think Iggy is hot?

is chocolate yummy?

2. Did you cry when Ari died?

no. that evil bastard deserved it!

3. Do you think Fang is hot?

If i did that would be the understatment of the century

4. How do you pronounce Ari's name?

Are-ee

5. Do you laugh every time you read the name Mr. Chu?

no.

6. -SPOILER ALERT- In MAX, did you laugh hysterically when Total started talking about marriage?

Yeessir.

7. -SPOILER ALERT- Did you squeal at all the faxness in MAX?

OF COURSE I DID! I WAS DONG A HAPPY DANCE WHEN THEY FINIALLY GOT TOGETHER! then i almost cried when Fang left.

8. Did you angrily throw your book across the room when the flock split up?

I would've, but it wasn't my book

9. Who is your favorite character?

It ish a tie between Iggy and Fang

10. Do you like Jeb?

HECK NO!

11. -SPOILER ALERT- Were you making a genuine "WTF" face when Max and Fang grew gills?

Yup! whats with that? they're bird hybrids, not fish.

12. Did you think MAX was better than TFW?

i don't remenber. Whichever had more Fax.

13. -SPOILER ALERT- Did you get slightly fed up with Nudge and Angel's slight attitudes in MAX?

Yush

14. Which book is your all time favorite?

All of zem except Angel.

15. If the flock had a theme song, what would it be?

Umm... Not sure...

16. Have you ever imagined the flock as a band playing whatever song comes up when listening to your iPod?

Yes. Fang got to be lead singer in Yesterday.

17. Who do you think the voice should be?

Artificial intelligence, not a person.

18. Do you think one or more members of the flock should learn to play an instrument?

maybe after they've saved the world.

19. What bugged you the most about TFW?

um... i dun remeber ^^;

20. MIGGY or FAX?

You say miggy, i throw up on your shoes.

FAX FAX FAX FAX FAX FAX FAXITY FAX FAX!

If you have ever pushed on a door that said "Pull" or pulled on a door that said "Push", copy this into your profile.
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile.
If you're easily confused or confuzzled add this to your profile.
If you don't review, I won't write. If I don't write, you won't review. If you think people should review after they read, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.
If, for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile
There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.
If you have ever said something that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile!
If you have the strangest dreams that you wish you remember but only end up remembering half of it copy and paste this into your profile.

If Miley Cyrus died and you would have a party because of it, copy and paste this on to your profile.

If you enjoy copying and pasting these copy and paste thingys, copy and paste this onto your profile.

60 FUN THINGS TO DO IN AN ELIVATOR

1. Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.

2. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.

3. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"

4. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.

5. Sell Girl Scout cookies.

6. On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.

7. Shave.

8. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"

9. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.

10. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

11. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.

12. Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!"

13. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.

14. One word: Flatulence!

15. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.

16. Do Tai Chi exercises.

17. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"

18. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not now, damn motion sickness!"

19. Give religious tracts to each passenger.

20. Meow occasionally.

21. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.

22. Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say "oops!"

23. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.

24. Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing buttons.

25. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.

26. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.

27. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.

28. Burp, and then say "mmmm...tasty!"

29. Leave a box between the doors.

30. Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.

31. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.

32. Start a sing-along.

33. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your beeper?"

34. Play the harmonica.

35. Shadow box.

36. Say "Ding!" at each floor.

37. Lean against the button panel.

38. Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.

39. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.

40. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."

41. Bring a chair along.

42. Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see wha in muh mouf?"

43. Blow spit bubbles.

44. Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.

45. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."

46. Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.

47. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

48. Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at the passengers.

49. Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger."

50. If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!"

51. Bring a water pistol. Soak everyone's shoes.

52. Start brushing off invisible bugs from your arms, screaming "Aaughh! Get them off!"

53. Challenge your neighbor to a "Tic-Tac-Toe" tournament.

54. Laugh hysterically for five seconds, stop, and glare at the other passengers like they are crazy.

55. Charge into the elevator dripping wet, holding a towel and wearing only a bath robe. Mutter something about how husbands/wives always come home early just when it's getting to the good part.

56. Make chalk drawings on the walls.

57. As the elevator is going up, jump violently up and down, shouting "Down! I said down, dammit!"

58. Crouch in one corner and growl menacingly at everyone who gets on.

59. Try to get a game of "Twister" going.

60. Wrinkle your nose and smell the air repeatedly. Sniff at your neighbor suspiciously, give a disgusted frown, and take a step away.

If you have ever tripped over air, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fan fictions, copy this onto your profile (my longest was till' 6'oclock in the morning:( I know I'm terrible!)

If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy this to your profile

If you have ever had a random song pop into your head at the most completely and utter worst time but you sing it anyway copy this into your profile.

If you hate girly-girls or people who think that they are everything, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile(story of my life)

If you are obsessed with fan fiction copy this into your profile

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile

If you've gotten completely zoned out of a conversation that you don't even remember what you were talking about copy and paste this in your profile.

If you ever got zoned out for more than five minutes copy and paste this in your profile.

98 percent of teenagers have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile

If you like being utterly random copy and paste this on your profile(weeeeee!!)

If you have ever laughed so hard you either choked, hyperventilated, had your sides cramp, or all of the above copy and paste this on your profile

A Dads Poem (this made me so sad)

Her hair was up in a pony tail,

her favorite dress tied with a bow.

Today was Daddy's Day at school,

and she couldn't wait to go.

But her mommy tried to tell her,

that she probably should stay home.

Why the kids might not understand,

if she went to school alone.

But she was not afraid; she knew just what to say.

What to tell her classmates of why he wasn't there today.

But still her mother worried, for her to face this day alone.

And that was why once again, she tried to keep her daughter home.

But the little girl went to school eager to tell them all.

About a dad she never sees, a dad who never calls.

There were daddies along the wall in back,

for everyone to meet.

Children squirming impatiently,

anxious in their seats.

one by one the teacher called a student from the class.

To introduce their daddy,

as seconds slowly passed.

At last the teacher called her name,

every child turned to stare.

each of them was searching,

for a man who wasn't there.

"Where's her daddy at?" she heard a boy call out.

"She probably doesn't have one," another student dared to shout.

And from somewhere near the back,

she heard a daddy say,

"Looks like another deadbeat dad,

too busy to waste his day."

The words did not offend her,

she smiled up at her Mom and looked back at her teacher,

who told her to go on.

And with hands behind her back,

slowly she began to speak.

And out from the mouth of a child,

came words incredibly unique.

"My Daddy couldn't be here,

because he lives so far away.

But I know he wishes he could be,

since this is such a special day.

And though you cannot meet him,

I wanted you to know.

All about my daddy,

and how much he loves me so.

He loved to tell me stories,

he taught me to ride my bike.

He surprised me with pink roses,

and taught me to fly a kite.

We used to share fudge sundaes,

and ice cream in a cone.

And though you cannot see him.

I'm not standing here alone.

Cause my daddy's always with me,

even though we are apart,

I know because he told me,

he'll forever be in my heart"

With that,

her little hand reached up,

and lay across her chest.

Feeling her own heartbeat,

beneath her favorite dress.

And from somewhere in the crowd of dads,

her mother stood in tears.

Proudly watching her daughter,

who was wise beyond her years.

For she stood up for the love of a man not in her life.

Doing what was best for her,

doing what was right.

And when she dropped her hand back down,

staring straight into the crowd.

She finished with a voice so soft,

but its message clear and loud.

"I love my daddy very much,

he's my shining star.

And if he could,

he'd be here,

but heaven's just too far.

You see,

he was a fireman,

and died just this past year when airplanes hit the towers and taught Americans to fear.

But sometimes when I close my eyes,

it's like he never went away."

And then she closed her eyes,

and saw him there that day.

And to her mother’s amazement,

she witnessed with surprise.

A room full of daddies and children,

all starting to close their eyes.

Who knows what they saw before them,

who knows what they felt inside.

Perhaps for merely a second,

they saw him at her side.

"I know you're with me Daddy,"

to the silence she called out.

And what happened next made believers,

of those once filled with doubt.

Not one in that room could explain it,

for each of their eyes had been closed.

But there on the desk beside her,

was a fragrant long-stemmed pink rose.

And a child was blessed,

if only for a moment,

by the love of her shining star.

And given the gift of believing,

that heaven is never too far.

‘They’ say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but then an entire life to forget them.

Send this to the people you'll never forget and remember to send it also to the person that sent it to you. It's a short message to let them know that you'll never forget them. If you don't send it to anyone, it means you're in a hurry and that you've forgotten your friends.

º¤ø„¸¨°º¤ø„¸¸„ø¤º°¨¸„ø¤º°¨
¨°º¤ø„¸MAXIMUM RIDE¸„ø¤º°¨
¸„ø¤º°¨ ~~~~ ROCKS!!~~~~°º¤ø„¸
¸„ø¤º°¨¸„ø¤º°¨¨°º¤ø„¸¨°º

|...| Put this on your |...| page if you have |...O| ever pushed a |...| door that said pull!

╔╗╔═╦╗ Put this on your page ║╚╣║║╚╗If you like to laugh or ╚═╩═╩═╝ laugh too much.

╔══╗ ║██║pυt this ║ O ║on your pαge ╚══╝if you like music

When life gives you lemons...

Make orange juice, and let the world wonder how you did it.

Throw them back at the jerk who gave 'em to ya and demand chocolate.

Alter their DNA and make SUPER LEMONS!

Eat them and spit the pips in Life's eyes.

Say, "Cool- I like lemons. What else you got?"

Put them in your hair and wait for it to turn blond.

Really Dumb Store Labels On a Myer hairdryer: "Do not use while sleeping." (Darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On a bag of Chips: "You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside." (The shoplifter special?)

On a bar of Palmolive soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (And that would be how??)

On some frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (But, it's just a suggestion).

On Nanna's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down". (Well...duh, a bit late, huh!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating". (And you thought...??)

On packaging for a K-Mart iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (But wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year olds with head colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (One would hope.)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (As opposed to what?)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (I gotta admit, I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Talk about a news flash.)

On artificial bacon: "Real artificial bacon bits". (So we don't get fake fake bacon. Oh no we get real fake bacon.)

I don't blame the company; I blame the parents for this one: On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly

The voices in my head may not be real but they still have pretty good ideas...

When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n’ slide.

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder.

Smile. It confuses people.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird.

You know it's going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor.

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.

If it wasn't for physics and law enforcement I'd be unstoppable.

Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'

Help, I've fallen and I can't...hey, nice carpet! It's soo pretty!

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.

There’s a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.

Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.

The cops never find it as funny as you do.

-If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

You Know You're a Book Addict If:

You can randomly open to a page and know exactly what's going on.
Read the book until 4 A.M., then get back up at 7 to continue reading.
You write fan fictions about the book.
You try to get all of your friends (and everyone else) to read your favorite books. Oh ya
You accidentally call everyone by the character's names.
Everything reminds you of the book.
You quote random lines all the time.
You try to do things that the characters do, even though you know you can't.
You've gotten incredibly bored in class, and debated on doing something your favorite character can do to escape the class.
You have pictures of your favorite characters on your iPod.
You've got a book memorized.
You've read a book more than five times.
You've read a book with 400+ pages in less than two days.
You've planned and prepared a siege on a writer's house because he/she killed a character you like. You've plotted to murder a character and steal her boyfriend. You hate it when someone calls your favorite character fictional.

You blatantly deny it when someone calls a character fictional

If you are one of the proud teens/adults who have a v-o-c-a-b-u-l-a-r-y and do not limit themselves to "omg!" and "Like, that is, like, so, like, totally awsome...!". copy and paste this into your profile..

If you don't get what the simplest things mean, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" thingies, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever laughed during something sad and depressing and ruined a moment, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever turned a corner and banged your arm/leg/toe/head on the wall (who hasn't???), put this in your profile and add your name to the list: Zilo Sugarpill, Ailia Sparrowhawk, iTorchic,Rena, TheWorldBookGirl, DianeJasmine, Wish2love4life, Starry Eye

If Faxness is one of your obsessions, post this in your profile.

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you love the whole blind, pyro, mutant, baker thing about Iggy, post this in your profile.

If your view on Maximum Ride is that there are much worse things you could be addicted to, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think the human identification thing when you log in to fan fiction is annoying, copy and past this into your profile.

If you've ever acted like a paranoid fool because you believe that fictional characters exist, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you solemnly swear you are up to no good copy and paste this into your profile

If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are obsessively, uncontrolably, in love with Fang, post this in your profile

If you would give up the life have now to live in the Maximum Ride world, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you have pulled any of these things, copy and paste it to your profile!

Fang: 2 avian 98 human 100 hott!

YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF...

You talk to yourself a lot. (e.g. Hmm, what would happen if it was sunny the day Bella got hit by the van? Oh, story idea!! Must get computer!)

You talk to yourself about talking to yourself. (e.g. 'Why do I constantly ask my self random things?' "Stop talking to yourself!" "No why should I?!")

When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else. (e.g. 'Have you ever noticed that deliver could mean someone's liver?')

After uttering a profound peice of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, "Wow,this stuff is great for sugar highs...'

You live off of sugar and caffine (the two greatest things ever discovered!)

You'll check your e-mail every day of the week and then dissappear off the face of the earth.

You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.

When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.

You tend to collect Bic Stics off the ground like picking pennies off the ground.

Your friends and family think that you have carpal tunnel syndrome.

People think you have A.D.D.

You think it'd be cool to have A.D.D.

You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.

You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason

Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.

And FINALLY, the one way to tell if you're a good writer: You failed English 101.

(copy this into you're profile if you fit one or more of the descriptions)

Anti-pick up lines:

Boy: Can I buy you a drink?

Girl: Actually, I'd rather have the money.

Boy: Will you go out with me this Saturday?

Girl: Sorry, I am having a headache this weekend.

Boy: Go on. Don't be shy. Ask me out.

Girl: Okay. Go out.

Boy: I think I could make you very happy.

Girl: Why? Are you leaving?

Boy: Shall we go see a movie?

Girl: I have already seen it.

Boy: Where have you been all my life?

Girl: Hiding from you.

(I burst out laughing when reading this)

Time spent → in the shower; 25% -- Daydreaming. 25% -- Building up courage to turn off water and step into cold air. 20% -- Turing in a circle to maintain even hot water distribution. 10% -- Catching water in your mouth and spitting it out. 10% -- Contemplating the hardest decisions of life. 7% -- Washing hair. 3% -- Washing other body parts. (it's scary how true this is)

Your about to get arrested* Cop: Your in a lot of trouble! You: wait. wait! WAIT. Cop: WHAT!? You: Can I update my status to "chilling in jail?"

Boy: Hey, watch this! *Breaks car window* Girl: NO!!! Boy: Like a good neighbor State Farm is there! Girl: THAT DOESN'T WORK!!! WE HAVE ALLSTATE!!!!!

Dear Parents,

Jasmine was in a relationship with a dirty homeless boy named Aladdin.

Snow White lived alone with 7 men.

Pinnochio was a liar.

Robin Hood was a thief.

Tarzan walked around without clothes on.

A stranger kissed sleeping beauty and she married him.

Cinderella lied and snuck out at night to attend a party.

You can't blame us. We were taught to rebel since a young age.

50 THINGS YOU DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT ME UNTIL YOU READ THIS:

1, What color is your toothbrush?

Red and white

2, Name one person who made you smile today

Well, i just woke up, soo.. how about yesterday? That would be my friends. they always make me smile and laugh :)

3, What were you doing at 8 am this morning:

Updating my profile on fanfiction

4, What were you doing 45 minutes ago?

Sleeping

5, What is your favorite candy bar?

3 musketeers

6, Have you ever been to a strip club?

ACK NO!!!

7, What is the last thing you said aloud?

Good morning

8, What is your favorite ice cream flavor?

chocolate

9, What was the last thing you had to drink?

The milk from the bottom of my cereal bowl

10, Do you like your wallet?

Yeah. It's made of ducktape ]

11, What was the last thing you ate?

kix (cereal)

12, Have you bought any new clothing items this week?

no.

13, The last sporting event you watched?

oh, um... the varsity tennis team. they have practice right across from my soccer practice

14, What is your favorite flavor of popcorn?

Chocolate covered

15, Who is the last person you sent a text message too?

no one.

16, Ever go camping?

I've been to a stay away camp and we slept in cabins and stuff

17, Do you take vitamins daily

no.

18, Do you go to church every Sunday?

I go once a month and go do evening prayer with my family almost every night at home.

19, Do you have a tan?

No, it faded

20,Do you prefer Chinese food over pizza?

Heck no!!

21, Do you drink your soda with a straw?

I drink everything with straws. but i don't like soda

22, What did your last text message say?

umm... how about e-mail? it said

YOU CAN'T BLOW UP IGGY! HE'D BLOW YOU UP FIRST!!

23, What are you doing tomorrow?

Sitting around, hopefully on fanfiction

25, Look to your left, what do you see?

A pen

26, What color is your watch?

Green, blue, and yellow

27, What do you think of when you hear Australia?

Australian accents and Stu. Long story short: I went on a cruise and the cruise director was Australian so every time there was an announcement, we'd hear "*Ping!* G'day everybody!" in a loud australian accent. It was the best way to wake up. ever. And that is not sarcasm.

28, What is your birthstone?

Turquoise

29 Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive thru?

I only go to fast food places when we're on a long trip and need a quick dinner, and we usually go in to stretch our legs and take a break from the car.

30, What is your favorite number?

13

31, Who's the last person you talked to on the phone?

My older sister who's in college

32, Any plans today?

no

33, How many states have you lived in?

One

34, Biggest annoyance right now?

ummm... i like school but it doesn't leave me with much time at home

35, Last song listened to?

Do you Remember by Jay Sean

36,Can you say the alphabet backwards?

no

37, Do you have a maid service clean your house?

Yeah. she's not really a maid though. She's really nice and comes every Monday and helps my Mom clean the house. She's more of a family friend. And, also, there's 8 people living in this house, so I can imagine my Mom appreciates the help.

38, Favorite pair of shoes you wear all the time?

My black and red airwalks and my camo rainboots. they're handy for exploring outside, which i do a lot.

39, Are you jealous of anyone?

No. I'm the only person i ever want to be. But I am jealous of people who have cell phones...

40, Is anyone jealous of you?

i dun think so

41, Do you love anyone?

My family, friends, and kittens ]

42, Do any of your friends have children?

God no!!!

43, What do you usually do during the day?

Computer, soccer, go outside, read, draw, write, e-mail/ talk to my friends.

44, Do you hate anyone that you know right now?

Yeah. This one jerk who makes fun of my friend so much sometimes she cries. I want to beat him up and then throw him in a dumpster.

45, Do you use the word 'hello' daily?

No. I say heyo or Hiya or Rawr

46, What color is your car?

dont have a license. I definatley don't have a car.

47, Do you like cats?

yes. love them

48. Are you thinking about someone right now?

no.

49, Have you ever been to Six Flags?

no

50, How did you get your worst scar?

I don't have a scar.

"I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no flipping way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating student as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that shit up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, oh crap, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you, you asshole."

"Clear vanilla notes, too-sweet chocolate chips, distinct flavour of brown sugar. A decent cookie, not spectacular. Still, a good-hearted cookie, not pretentious." I turned to Fang. "What say you?" "It's fine."…Some people just don't have what it takes to appreciate a cookie. – The Angel Experiment

"I'll grab a zebra; Gaz, you fill all the bubbles with your trademark scent. so people are choking and gagging; and let's throw beef jerky in their eyes! Now, that'sa plan!" -Iggy

"I love Nudge, I really do. But that motor mouth of her's could have turned mother Theresa into an Axe murderer" - Max

"I know everything, as I continue to remind you." –Fang

"Fang? Are you - like Max?"
"Nope. I'm the smart one." -Dr. Martinez and Fang

“He's gonna be fine,” I confirmed.
”Can we see him?” Iggy asked.
”Ig, I hate to break it to you, but you're blind.”- School's Out- Forever

"Yes!" said Fang, punching the air. "Freaks rule." – The Angel Experiment

"I feel like, like pudding," Iggy groaned. "Pudding with nerve endings. Pudding in great pain." – The Angel Experiment

“Boy, you just can't kill people like you used to," said Fang" – School's Out Forever

“Buckingham Palace? You know, like where the Queen Lives. And Mr. Queen?”-Nudge

"Holy [Insert your choice of a swear word here," – Fang

"I vill now destroy de Snickuhs bahs!"- Gazzy

"You are a fridge with wings; we are freaking ballet dancers"- Fang

"Then it hit me, I was trapped in a small, enclosed space with the Gasman Oh God!" Max

“Apart from my fashion sense? I play a mean harmonica!” - Fang, STWAOES

“Who wants to sing ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall?” - Fang, SOF

Things Maximum Ride has Taught Us:
1. Being different is okay.
2. Even the little things can help save the world.
3. Red-heads are evil!!
4. Love always makes itself known. Even if it takes you five books and fourteen years of your life to see it, it's there.
5. 6-year-olds do have the ability to take over the world.
6. Duct tape is a handy tool if you have a mimicking 8-year-old.
7. The loss of a vet would be a tragedy.
8. Dressing in dark clothes and never talking does not make you emo; it makes you Fang-like.
9. French is the universal language.
10. Fang-sized is an acceptable form of measurement.
11. Count your blessings.
12. Teen magazines don't help you in life or death situations.
13. Nachos and Moutain Dew are proper mind controlling devices.
14. Fang has the power to sum up your life story in nine words.
15. Even a kick-ass, leader of a merry band of mutants like Max can make mistakes.
16. Never get hooked on Valium.
17. The best breed of dogs are talking Scotties!!
18. If one cannot be corrupted by power or money, there's always Snicker's bars.
19. It is okay to sell your soul for a chocolate-chip cookie.
20. Kids are better than adults.
21. You'll know the Apocalypse is coming when Max is wearing a dress.
22. The best cooks are blind pyros.
23. Submarines are tiny tin cans of doom.
24. Desert rat should always be cooked to well-done.
25. School really is an evil place.
26. Teachers really are out to get you.
27. Remember to flap.
28. Only one bird kid could pull off preppy Top-Siders.
29. GIRLS KICK BOYS' BUTTS!!
30. The order of power: God, Jesus, Chuck Norris, Max, Fang, Angel, Iggy, Gazzy, Nudge, Total, humans, animals. Brigid, Sam and Lissa don’t make the list.

A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him.
The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here."
The black man turned around and stood up. He then said:
"When I was born I was black,
When I grew up I was black,
When I'm sick I'm black,
When I go in the sun I'm black,
When I'm cold I'm black,
When I die I'll be black.
But you sir...
When you're born you're pink,
When you grow up you're white,
When you're sick, you're green,
When you go in the sun you turn red,
When you're cold you turn blue,
And when you die you turn purple.
And yet you have the nerve to call me colored"
The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Copy this onto your profile and help stop racism

DORMITORY:
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM

PRESBYTERIAN:
When you rearrange the letters:
BEST IN PRAYER

ASTRONOMER:
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER

DESPERATION:
When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT

THE EYES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE

GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE

THE MORSE CODE :
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS

SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME

ANIMOSITY:
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY

ELECTION - RESULTS:
When you rearrange the letters:
LIES - LET'S RECOUNT

SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS! NO MORE Z 'S

A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:
IM A DOT IN PLACE

THE EARTHQUAKES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THAT QUEER SHAKE

ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letters:
TWELVE PLUS ONE

- Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.
- Some people are alive today, simply because it is illegal to kill them.
- I used all my sick days, so I called in dead...
- They say, "Guns don't kill people, people kill people.' Well, I think the gun helps, because if you just stood there and yelled, "BANG" I dont think you'd kill too many people.
- So, if guns kill people, can I blame misspelled words on my pencil?
- Yeah, I'm a loser. But the coolest loser you'll ever meet.
- Save the Earth. It's the only planet with chocolate.
- No, I won't go to Hell! It has a restraining order against me.
- You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
- When Life gives you lemons, throw them back, because, I mean, really? Who likes lemons?
- When Life gives you lemons, make grape juice, and sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.
- When Life gives you lemons, squirt them in Life's eye, and see how much Life likes lemons then.
- Life isn't passing me by; it's trying to run me over.
- Smile; it makes people wonder what you're up to.
- I talk to myself because my answers are the only ones I accept!
- Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap... you decide.
- I live in my own little world. But it's okay, they know me there.
- The dinosaurs' extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide.
- Your weirdness is creeping out my imaginary friend.
- If electricity comes from electrons, where do you think morality comes from?
- Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning many and 'tics' as in the bloodsucking leeches?
- You cry, I cry. You laugh, I laugh. You jump off a cliff, I laugh even harder.
- Everything in this room is eatable, even I'm eatable. But that is called 'cannibalism' my dear children, and it is in fact frowned upon in most societies.
- I used to be normal... until I met those freaks I call my friends.
- I got you a present; it's a CD. I hope you haven't got it, because I don't have a receipt... and I didn't exactly buy it...
- The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese!
- When in doubt, make up words!
- Home is not where you live, but where they understand you.
- If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving isn't for you!
- If you're gonna be two-faced, sweetie at least make one of them pretty.
- All work and no play means you will die in seven days... dun dun duuun.
- I run with scissors; it makes me feel dangerous.
- Don't worry about the world coming to an end today; its already tomorrow in Australia.
- Kids are the future. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
- You say I'm not cool. Cool is just another word for cold. If I'm not cold then I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thank You for embracing it!
- Come to the Dark Side... we have cookies!
- One day we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.
- Give a person a fish and feed them for a day, teach them how to use the internet and they won't bother you for weeks!
- Before you critisize someone walk a mile in their shoes, that way you'll be a mile away and have their shoes!
-The statistics of insanity is that 1 of every 4 people have a mental illness. Look at your three best friends, if they're okay, then it's you.
- When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.
- A loser is a window washer on the 44th floor who steps back to admire his work.
- Flying is simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss.
- There is no "I" in team but there is an "I" in PIE and there is an "I" in MEATPIE and MEAT is an anagram of TEAM...
- Music is like candy: You throw away the (w)rappers.
- The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not.
- Two things are infinite; the universe, and human stupidity... not so sure about the universe.
- What happens if you get scared half to death twice? That's a really good question... I wonder...
- My mind works like lightning... one brilliant flash and it's gone.
- Do not take life too seriously; no one gets out alive.
- If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.
- Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?
- Don't you dare tell me the sky is the limit when there are footsteps on the moon.
- I was going to take over the world, but I got distracted by something sparkly.
- Don't hit kids. No, seriously, they have guns now.
- WARNING: Children left unattended will be sold to the circus.
- If your heart was really broken you'd be dead, so shut up.
- Yes, I do use my hairbrush as a microphone and dance around in my underwear. Thank you very much.
- I don't have a dog... I eat my own homework. I'm not random, I just have many tho- OOH, LOOK! A SQUIRREL!
- Please: Don't throw your cigarette butt's on the floor, the cockroaches are getting cancer.
- There are three kinds of people: Those who can count, and those who can't.
- Welcome to the internet, pants optional.
- Warning: Trespassers will be shot, Survivors will be shot again.
- If I throw a stick, will you go away?
-When I'm in the car and a sad song comes on I stare out the window and pretend I'm in a movie...