The story and charcters in this story was all made by me, i dont own nothing, but my thoughts, my feelings, and my wirrtings. Please enjoy reading and give me feed back.

A Little About Me

(My name is kenette and im a 20 year old female, i live in a blendon kentucky, i like to thin of it as the middle of no where. Blendon is made up of 2 very smll citys Hayten, and Mariontown. Oh yeah, and there an army base here too. Yeah you should see all the toruest that we get here. Any way on a friday night you wont be able to find nothing to do and end up drunk at your cutty buddys house watching i love lucy with his mam, taking all the shots of vodia that you want. What's even worse is that you will be more then entertaned.)

Life is funny, sometimes i think that its just a big joke and god is just having a really good time lauging at me. Becasue i can really see where my life is so harlerious, i like to laugh at it myself when im really drunk. I think really deep about it when im high. Just to set the recard staright im not a drug addacit or anything, but yea i do smoke and drink, but ive cut down recently. if it not made from earth then i dont mess with it. I wonder waht he is doing right now? as i lay here writting my mind cant help but wonder to the thought of him. now ive got to write about how stupid i am to even be thinking about him when he never cared about me in the first place, and i should have listend to myself and let it go. "BabyBoy" it makes me said even to think about him right now, becasue this time me and him both really fucked up and now where both going to have to live with the out come. the out come that hasnt came yet thats why ive been wirrting recently. Ive been so angrey, so sad, so deeply upset that i had to find an exscape, and i remeber how wirrting used to take me to deeper thoughts a reality that i wanted to face and not the one that was being forced up on me. the first night after i picked up the pen again i felt really good when i layed my head down to go to sleep, i didnt have all the days drama on my mind andi was at peace, its was new and great. it was so good that ive made it a point to wirte everynight.

( I didnt know that love was the slowest form of sucide, no one ever told me that. i didnt find out until after it was too late. NO, i ahvent killed myself or nothing, Im more of the muder type of crazy. but yeah i did kill myself slowly with the love that i did have for him. i walked out on him, right after he left me at the train sation waiting for the train to pull back in town. Atfer he had his life adventurs and wanted to come back home to pay some bills and make sure that the yard didnt look that bad, i eman he could only leave it for 2 and a half weeks at a time. well i got a job punchin tickets at the train sation, so my time was well occiped until the train came back in. It didnt pay for shit.)

My Immortal

" I'm going crazy, i cant keep on doing this, you cant keep pulling me along like im some kind of toy that you dont want but dont want no one else to have. But dont wanna ply with yourself." "LOOK AT ME!"

As i take my hands and make him look at me, i fanily see, i see that the emontion that was in my eyes was nothing compared to his. I didnt see nothing but a twisted boy that would never change. My eye's feeling like the clouds most, right before it rains. I could'nt say a word all i could do was ask myself why do i love him so much. I couldnt take no more of him. I put my hand on the gear shift, and took my foot off the break and left him standing where the car had just been. he watched me as i pulled all the way up the drive way until. When i got to the road tears was running down my face. I parked in my drive-way that night and cried for hours and hours. just sitting in the car listeing to music. I chagned my whole myspace page that night it looked liek i was a total emo on the verage of a bad breakdown.

" Kenette, girl whats wrong with you?" I had just got up it was 12:30 saturday afternoon." What are you talking about, God i you just woke me up."

"why is your page so depressing, did you and dumbass get into it again?. I'm going to kill him i swear" i laughed becasue i was thinking that me and her could really do it together. " Yea i walked away last night."

" Alright, i was jsut trying to make sure everything was okay." Right before i was going to say something, " but hey let me call you back. Luv you"

"luv you too." and i hung up.

Mi'cheal my older sister, As of right now me and her are on good terms, its just becasue right now her husband is in afganstan, and shes lonely. Me and her go off and on, we hang out for like every 4months real hard and then we only talk like every now and then for the rest of the year. Me and have been hanging out alot shes been taking me with her to do all the things that army wives do. which is going to the bar on post getting discounted drinks. Me and her are so different yet we are so the same. We both shot to mars when we get pissed off, and there is no bringing us back. Mentaily we're alot alike. see im the type of girl that can sit outside around a bonefire in the middle of summer drinking listeing to music. She's at the bar. I cant really say nothing bad about her, welll i can but im not mad at her right now so i have nothing bad to say. But she is my sista and i love her.

I got into the shower, because i feel that if you dont take your shower before 1:30 your day will be wasted, and thats only if you wake up at 12. By the time i had my make-up on and my hair done i wasnt shocked that mi'cheal had called 3 times, sent 2 sms, and had done buzzed the im window a million times. I wasnt tripping over caliing her right back i could do that on my way out to the car. Some where between calling and pulling out the drive-way in the car i had forgot to call. I guess thats becasue the text message i had just got had changed my whole game plan for the day. Justice my bestie got stuck chilling wit Sean and Dawayne and they had money and wanted me to come and kick it with them. It was a really hot day, so andi already knew that we was going to have a good time tonight. Oh by the way Sean is "babyboy" but when me and him arent doing so good he's sean jus so you know. I had the phone im my hand and ready to call MI'cheal until i pulled into the parking lot at the store and Justice was cussing out Dawayne while he was pumping gas. She was so loud and i was so shamed and happy that i wasnt being seen getting in the same car as them.

"Kenette what are you doing?" i felt her run up on me pulling my hair, i turned around, " what's happen'in?"

" Nothing getting gas in Franks car, about to take it back and get in the car with you." i smiled becasue i caught Sean looking at me, " Yea, im going to buy a rello"

i walked into the store, there was 3 other people in fornt of me, i was looking at the candy that was on sale when Sean and dawayne walked in. I was wishing that they would open the other side before they had the chance to get behind me. i was almost free until the person in fornt of me credit card ddint work.

" Kenette, i like how you just left last night, didnt say bye or nothing." i didnt look at him and wasnt going to say nothing to him.

" Aww, is kenette mad at her babyboy?" i smiled handning the cashier my money i got my change and was going to walk out but my arm was being pulled.

" Baby, what's wrong with you, i got some money im going to get a bottle of paul " he slaped my ass.

"Sean! what ware you doing?"

" Thats's the only way that i can get yo to hear me."

I opend the car door and he got in. And like always i walked over and got in on the passangers side. Justice screamed something at me but i didnt hear her bcasue the music was up and he was flying out of the parking lot. Yea i know what your thinking your letting him drive your car after the way that he made you feel yesturday. And yeah i know it's more carizer then it sounds. But what can i say the train was fully stoped and ready for a weekly visit.

Number ONE Fan

(It was drak and the Tv was on, the music was on and i was layed back chilled. tha day had been so lovely, I was gone. On every level that you can be gone off, i was feeling really right. I had my friends and i had my loves and all of us together mad me really happy. Im all the way drunk.)

I was really feeling Sean tonight, i alreayd knew that i was going home with him by the way that he had been acting all day. Dawayne and justice was almost passed out. SO when Sean told me to come on i wasnt i got up and went. He layed me down on the bed, touching my body softly, kissing me in all the right spots. As my jeans got unbottned i rasied up a lil so that it would be easier for him to take them off. He kissed me again...

"Are you okay?" i was breathing real hard " yea, i love you babyboy" He looked me in the eyes and as he pushed deeper in side me

"i love you too."

There was ahot ight one my face. I opend my eyes to see the sun shine through the window. I looked over and sean was knocked the hell out looking all cute. I love to watch him sleep. I didnt want to get up but there was no way that i was going back to sleep. i turned on the tv and posted up on the bed. I would poke Sean every now and then but he didnt ever get all the way up. i was wearing nothing but a tee-shirt when the beating on the window started. Sean got up fast and went to the window looking out a little bit before he opened it all the way. SO i wuldnt see who it was.

" Is my sister here?" i jumped off the bed and pulled the whole curtin down " mi'cheal what are you doing here?"

" NO, what are you doing here?" i smiled " hold on ill be right out"
I put on my jeans sheose grabed my phone and keys gave Sean a kiss and walked out. Mi'cheal was already telling her ride to go when i got to the purch.

" Kenttte i called you all day yesturday and now i know what you was doing." "you look like shit, thats whaat you get" I laughed and rolled my eyes " it was good"

she opend the passngers side door " it always is from what you say, you done made your mysapce page a fan page to him." I looked at her and was weak.

"Well you do, your page is eatiher you telling everyone how your his one and only his ride r die, and then 3 hors later he the wosest thing that's going on in your life." she started laughing after she said that.

We went out to eat and then me and her went to see a moive, we spnet the whole day together acting crazy, it was just me and her and it was great. i heared all about how she turned the bar out and she heared all about my night wit Sean. Then we smoked a blunt and i droped her off at her mother in laws house. I got in the shower and thought about the night before. I was getting dressed when my phone rung.

" Hey babyboy"

" aye where are you at?" i heared the radio in the back and i knew that he was in a car. " im home where you at?"

" Hey come outside im coming to smoke blunt with you" He hung up and i put shorts and a tank top and walked outside.

I wasnt out there long until he pulled up. Parking right behind my car. He got out with the blutn alreayd lite and handed it to me. He was looking really cute. I was hitting the blunt looking at him and he was looking at me.

" I missed you kenette." i smiled and gave him a hug

" i love you"

"i love you too babyboy"

( As i smoked with him under the stars just me and him i knew why i coudlnt let him go. The same reasnon that he couldnt let me go. The sex was too good, The green was Fire, and the head games was no other. After he left i went inside and changed my mypsace page.. Headline: Ye@ im Hi NuMb@ 0n3)

Just Another Name In His Little Black Book

When i got to dawayne's house Justice, Dawayne, Sean, and soem other girl was sitting otuside. I laughed to myself because it had been 2 weeks sicne me and Sean had seen each other. We had tlked on the phone a few times but we hadnt kicked it. So i wasnt shocked when i seen some new girl outside. I got out the car Justice walked over. we jsut looked at each toher for a min.

" That's the pawn shop girl" i alughed becasue me and Justice dont call Seans new girls by there name we call them by the place where he found the girl. " Oh the pawn shop. what happend to the tjmax chick?" Justice laughed

" Yeah, she has been driveing me crazy for the past week, she's been over here forever, Sean and Dawayne be living her with me." I was laughing so hard becasue justice is always getting stuck with the flovur of the weeks. "danm, they been caked up like that?"

Sean walked over to me, his girlfirend was standing behind like she was scared or something. I just looked at him and smiled. Justice looked at the girl and rolled her eyes then she smiled at me. I laughed not caring if she thought that i was laughing at her or not. The look she gave me mad me think that i might have made her mad. the thought of that made me laugh even harder. I stayed and kicked it over there for on hour and then i called my sister and decied to go over to her house. As i was leaving Sean's girlfriend thought that she had to kiss him and hug him beofre i left so that i could see it. I rolled my eyes and walked out. Me and my sister sat in her kitchen table taking shots of jim beam talking about everything that pissed us off and how we was going to blow shit up and burn shit down. It was mine and her crazy snapp out and it was great. Me and mi'cheal chilled real hard the whole weekend we stayed at the house watching movies, doing our nails, haveing a girls weekend. Justice even came over, i think it was more becaue she wanted to get away from the pawn shop girl,but she came over and stayed up all night with us watching movies and then went back home when we was going to bed. I got the 411 on everything that was going on which was good im not going to lie. When i got back home, i was jsut chilling and kicking it wehn there was a knock on my window.

" What are you doing here?" i looked at Sean in the eyes. "I came to see you, since you dont come over no more." I rolled my eyes and closed the window and just looked at him.

" Kenette, open the window." i smield at him and shock my head no. I walked to the door and beofre i could even get it all the way open he had his head all in the door. " what do you want Sean, where's your girlfriend?" He looked at me real seirous.

" She aint my girlfriend, I aint with no one." i nodded my head in agreaance with him " yea, who you telling"

I let him come in and we went in my room. I layed on the bed and he sat on the chair and he told me all the things that had happened in his life that i had missed. Most of it was creamile acts that he had done and was oh so rpuod of himself. I told him what i had been doing and then we smoked and everything was good. we sat for hours until he layed on the bed and i fall asleep. I felt hi put his arm aorund me some time druing the night and it felt chills go through me. Me and him chilled a lilttle bit after we got up and then he kissed me and told me that he would be back. He called me 3 hours later telling me that he wanted me to come over to dawaynes.

( So, i went and we did what we always did and that's smoke, drink, and chill, the pawn shop girl showed up, Sean and me left a lilttle bit after she got there, Yea it was really messed up, but wut can you expect when your just another girl that got sold a one way ticket.)