My name: Reni... (its my nickname :D)

And the girl in the picture is me, the guy is a good friend of mine :D

My birthday: September 15… (For anyone with the same b-day as me... SICK!!)

Interesting stuff about ME: I’m am SO kool :D, I LOVE reading, watching movies, listening to music, chyllin' wit people, playing on the computer, just regular teen age shit.

What I Like: ANYTHING PLEASES ME!!

For people that know me: I honestly don't care; don't tell me that you know me because that is annoying... Cause its lik ' yah i no u and so wat??'

Intelligence is bliss, ignorance is funny." – Inkheart (37)

"Stories never really end, even if they like to pretend they do. Stories always go on. They don't end on the last page, any more than they begin on the first page." -Mortimer Folchart, Inkspell

"i fall easily but when no ones there to catch me, i get up, dust my self off, and move on with my life. i dont stay down for long..." by ME!!no stealin' :D

Question: Why do good girls like bad boys?

RACISM IS WRONG!

Racism is wrong, and can often times destroy people's self confidence. It's a horrible and cruel way to treat people. To prove that we are all alike, try this simple experiment: Hold your hand up to a light of some kind. You'll see a shadow cast nearby. Now, have someone of a different race hold their hand up too. You'll see, essentially, the same image. Five fingers and a palm. Skin color doesn't matter when you get right down to it. If you are against racism, copy this message and my symbol for equality to your profile.

A true friend is someone who will try to answer the "eraser bits" question and have a long conversation about it. A friend is someone who wont say anything when you cry for no reason, but will start sobbing too, just help you cry. If you have a true friend, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you think the Eragon movie was horrible, that the book was WAY better, and that the person who wrote the script should be tortured in some horrid manner (use your imagination), copy and paste this to your profile and add you name to the list: GuardianOfTheMorningStar, Beyond the Pages, Amazinggirlreni,

98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this into your profile

~pass the ribbon around if you know someone that has survived, DIED, or is living with cancer.

My name is Chris.
I am three,
My eyes are swollen
I cannot see,

I must be stupid
I must be bad,
What else could have made
My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better
I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.

I can't do a wrong
I can't speak at all
Or else I'm locked up
All day long.

When I'm awake im all alone
The house is dark
My folks aren't home

When my mommy does come home
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll just get
One whipping tonight.

I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie's bar.

I hear him curse
My name is called
I press myself
Against the wall

I try to hide
From his evil eyes
I'm so afraid now
I'm starting to cry

He finds me weeping
Calls me ugly words,
He says its my fault
He suffers at work.

He slaps and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And run to the door

He's already locked it
And I start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall

I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken.

"I'm sorry!" I scream
But its now much to late
His face has been twisted
Into an unimaginable shape

The hurt and the pain
Again and again
O please God, have mercy!
O please let it end!

And he finally stops
And heads for the door
While I lay there motionless
Sprawled on the floor

My name is Chris
I am three,
Tonight my daddy
Murdered me.

IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE, COPY THAT POEM INTO YOUR PROFILE!!

A poem about Child Abuse

My name is Lucifer

I am three,

My eyes are swollen

I cannot see,

I must be stupid

I must be bad,

What else could have made

My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better

I wish I weren’t ugly,

Then maybe my mommy

Would still want to hug me.

I can’t do a wrong

I can’t speak at all

Or else im locked up

All day long.

When im awake im all alone

The house is dark

My folks aren’t home

When my mommy does come home

I'll try and be nice,

So maybe ill just get

One whipping tonight.

I just heard a car

My daddy is back

From Charlie’s bar.

I hear him curse

My name is called

I press myself

Against the wall

I try to hide

From his evil eyes

I’m so afraid now

I’m starting to cry

He finds me weeping

Calls me ugly words,

He says its my fault

He suffers at work.

He slaps and hits me

And yells at me more,

I finally get free

And run to the door

He’s already locked it

And i start to bawl,

He takes me and throws me

Against the hard wall

I fall to the floor

With my bones nearly broken,

And my daddy continues

With more bad words spoken,

"I’m sorry!", I scream

But its now much to late

His face has been twisted

Into a unimaginable shape

The hurt and the pain

Again and again

O please God, have mercy!

O please let it end!

And he finally stops

And heads for the door

While i lay there motionless

Brawled on the floor

My name is Lucifer

I am three,

Tonight my daddy

Murdered me

Now i roam the underworld,

to help those in need.

I may seem evil,

but i'm not.

And if you read this

and don’t pass it on

I pray for your forgiveness

Because you would have to be

AOne heartless person

To not be effected

By this Poem

And because you are effected,

Do something about it!

So all i ask you to do

Is pass this on!

IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE

If you believe that flaming is wrong, and that CC (Constructive Criticism) should be practiced more frequently on fanfiction, copy this into your profile.

(Try this… it funny):I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnartnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny ipromoatnt tihng it taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh, and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! Tahts so cool!
If you could read that, put it in your profile.

If you think Inkheart is one of the best books ever written and if they screw up the movie you want to lead a mob to the directors door so we can beat the crap out of him, then PLEASE copy this into your profile and add your name: Inkheart37, Beyond the Pages, Amazinggirlreni

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.

If you agree that books are the greatest thing in the world, copy this into your profile.

Ninety-Five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list, Queen S of Randomness 016, Queen B of Randomness 016, AnimieKittyCaffe, The Gypsy Pirate Queen, That Bloody Demon, The Astrology Nerd, Shadow929, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Yavie Aelienel, Hyperactively Bored, Spymaster E, Shanny-Boo, Gem W, Brown-eyed angelofmuisc, piratesswriter/fairy to be, Bara-Minamoto, Em Quagmire, Buffy the Mary-Sue Slayer, Harry's Girl 01031992, WanderingTeen, Fuzzy-Pamplemousse, GuardianoftheMorningStar, Inkheart37, Beyond the Pages, Amazinggirlreni

( /) (")_(")
Copy the bunny to your profile to help him achieve world domination,
and come join the dark side.
(We have cookies!)

I'm into THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual

I'm BI, so I MUST think every girl I see is hot

I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly or crazy

I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth

I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive

I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash

I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST think I'm better

I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control

I'm WICCAN, so I MUST be a devil-worshiping baby killer

I SUCK MY OWN BLOOD FROM WOUNDS, so I MUST have a vampire fetish

I'm a GOOD LIAR, so I MUST be an actor/actress

I'm a BLACK BELT, so I MUST always want to kick someone's butt

I'm a FEMALE BLACK BELT, so I MUST be a lesbian

I LIKE TO BE MYSELF, so I MUST be cocky and arrogant

I'm FRENCH, so I MUST be homosexual

I'm a BOHEMIAN, so I MUST be a lazy drug addict

I LOVE ANIMALS, so I MUST be a vegetarian

I'm a TREEHUGGER, so I MUST be a drug addicted hippie

I'm INTO JIMI HENDRIX, so I MUST be on drugs

I'm a MUSICIAN, so I MUST not be doing anything with my life

I have GOOD GRADES, so I MUST be a nerd or suck-up

I have GREEN SKIN, so I MUST be a wicked witch

I'm DIFFERENT, so I MUST just want attention

I'm an ACTOR/ACTRESS, so I MUST be mean

I haven't EVER HAD A BOYFRIEND, so I MUST be a unromantic

I'm THIN, so I MUST have an eating disorder

I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a stupid ditz

I'm a BRUNETTE, so I MUST be a smart alec

I HAVE A LOT OF GUY FRIENDS so I MUST be dating them all

I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS

I'm ASIAN, so I MUST love math

I'm BLACK, so I MUST be on welfare

I'm PUNK, so I MUST slit my wrists

I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob

I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist

I'm IRISH, so I MUST be an alcoholic

I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a with a jock boyfriend

I'm a JEW, so I MUST be greedy

I'm a METHODIST so I MUST be lazy not caring person

I LOVE RENT, so I MUST be an emo lesbian with AIDS

I'm a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST hear crazy God voices in my head

I'm AMERICAN, so I MUST be an overweight pig with no boundaries

I'm a GIRL, so I MUST suck at all guy sports

I like CATS, so I MUST dance like a cat in my spare time

I LOVE MY FRIENDS, so I MUST be giving them something

I'm SUSPICIOUS, so I MUST be an arrogant jerk

I SPEAK GERMAN, so I MUST be a psycho Nazi

I'm IN BAND, so I MUST be a geek

I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST be rebellious

I have ADHD/ADD, so I MUST be a crazy-chick that you can't control.

I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser

I DON'T HAVE A RELIGION, so I MUST not have morals

I'm a DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible

I'm a REPUBLICAN, so I MUST support everything that Bush does

I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay

I'm a DANCER, so I MUST be stupid and stuck up

I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals

I'm ALWAYS SMILING AND LAUGHING, so I MUST have a great life

I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention

I'm SHORT, so I MUST compensate with something else

I HANG OUT WITH GAYS, so I MUST be gay too

I'm IMPULSIVE, so I MUST be an idiot.

I'm BLOND, so I MUST be dumb.

I'm WHITE, so I MUST be prejudiced.

I WRITE, so I MUST be a loner.

I'm QUIET AND SHY so I MUST be stuck-up.

I'm AWKWARD AROUND THE OPPOSITE SEX, so I MUST be a pimple-faced teen.

I'm FORGETFUL, so I MUST be doing it on purpose.

I sometimes SAY STUPID THINGS so I MUST be stupid.

Stop stereotypes! Copy this list into your profile and add any more that you can think of.

If you believe that there are actually worlds and worlds of life beyond what we read in books, copy this into your profile.

If you have music in your soul, copy this to your profile.

If you wish you could go into your story as one of your characters, copy and paste this to your profile.

TRY NOT TO CRY:

Mommy.. Johnny brought a gun to school,

He told his friends that it was cool,

And when he pulled the trigger back,

It shot with a great crack.

Mommy, I was a good girl, I did What I was told,

I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!

But Mommy, when I went to school that day,

I never said good-bye,

I'm sorry Mommy, I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.

When Johnny shot the gun, He hit me and another,

And all because Johnny, Got the gun from his older brother.

Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,

And please tell Trevor; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.

And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now,

And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now,

And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best;

Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest.

Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,

And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass.

Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one deserves this,

Mommy, warn the others, Mommy I left without a kiss.

And Mommy tell the doctors; I know they really did try,

I think I even saw a doctor, Trying not to cry.

Mommy, I'm slowly dying, With a bullet in my chest,

But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest.

Mommy I ran as fast as I could,

When I heard that crack, Mommy, listen to me if you would,

I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new,

I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo.

I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,

I wanted to be an actress, Mommy, I wanted to live.

But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late,

Mommy, tell my Trevor, I'm sorry but I had to cancel the date.

I love you Mommy, I always have, I know; you know it's true,

And Mommy all I wanted to say is, "Mommy, I love you."

In Loving Memory of The Columbine Students Who Were Lost. Please if you would, pass this around. I'd be happy if you could; don't smash this on the ground. If you pass this on, maybe people will cry. Just keep this in your heart for the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye". Now you have 2 choices, 1) Pass this on, and show people you care, repost as "Try Not To Cry" 2) Don't send it, and you have just proven how cold-hearted you really are.

If you break out in random laughing fits for no apparent reason that last for minutes or even hours on end, copy this into your profile.

If you're easily confused or confuzzled add this to you're profile.

If you've ever wondered if you were adopted because of your sibling, copy this into your profile.

I'm bored... If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do...

If you think that Barney, Clowns, Teletubbies, Mimes, and Boobahs are the ultimate source of evil, copy this onto your profile.

If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile.

If you're in love with a fictional character, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you believe in true love paste this to your profile.

If you are a total daydreamer paste this to your profile.

If you believe that somewhere out in the vast open world there is a Prince Charming waiting for you paste this to your profile.

If you think this is unnecessary but you still are doing it paste this to your profile.

If you are random paste this to your profile.

If you never figured out if zebras are black w/white stripes or white w/black stripes paste this to your profile.

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile.

If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random, or anything similar, copy this into your profile

If you can't stand stupid girls copy and paste this onto your profile

If you are planing world domination (most of us are) then copy and paste this onto your profile

If you are unconditionally and irrevocably in love with Twilight copy and paste this on to your profile

If you can just never type fast enough copy and paste this onto your profile

If you are against drunk driving please copy this onto your profile

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

If you are addicted to vampires, post this onto your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile.

If, for no reason, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile

If you truly believe, there is an Edward Cullen somewhere for you (Doesn't mean his name has to be Edward Cullen or is a vampire but it would be a really awesome perk), copy this into your profile.

You know your addiction to Twilight is getting dangerous when you've added "Volterra" to your computer's dictionary. If you have done just that, copy this into your profile. (And multiple other Twilight words. Volturi, Carlisle, Irina, etc.)

If you are absolutely in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional charater Edward, from twilight, copy and paste this into your profile

98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.

If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile.

Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile.

If you couldn't possibly survive without your type of music, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped down the stairs copy this into your profile.

If you are crazy and/or insane and proud of it copy and paste this onto your profile

30 percent of kids go to college. The other 70 either drop-out or don't have the proper skills to. If you're on of the 30 percent that you know you're going to go to college, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have broke out in tears for no reason, and then laughed while still crying copy and paste this onto your profile!

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

If you've ever sung in the rain paste this to your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If your kind of guy is tall, dark and mysterious w/bright eyes paste this to your profile.

If you just need a hug copy this into your profile!

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.

If you have seen a movie so many times that you have memorized almost all of the lines, and you still laugh at every punch line, copy this onto your profile.

If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in your profile.

If you want child abuse to STOP, copy and paste this into your profile.

Month One

Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus' arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .

One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

If you're against abortion, re-post this

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.

I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.

I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.

We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.

I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.

I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.

I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.

I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.

We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.

I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.

I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.

I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.

I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.

I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.

I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me.

I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.

I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.

I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male.

Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it.

If you know you have an unhealthy obsession with one or all of the Cullens, but you don't really care because even though admitting you have a problem is the first step to healing, frankly, you don't wanna heal.

If you think that the kids should stop chasing Lucky and leave the leprechaun alone, then copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy & paste this into your profile

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy & paste this onto your profile!

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, LiveForInsanity, Billvy, Sheena Is A Punk Rocker, Zoe Cullen

Controversial Issues:
1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, liposuction and air conditioning.

2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britney Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world

needs more children.

7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.

9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans... Re-post this if you believe in legalizing gay marriage

ok some of the following r illegal and some r mean so beware i dont have time to delete those ones but some r hilarious!!:

1. Specify that your drive-thru order is "to go."

2. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

3. Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub."

4.Name your dog "Dog."

5. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."

6. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what you think."

7. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training."

8. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with a can of Lysol.

9. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.

10. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment.

11. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others t ha t you "like it that way."

12. Tell 1-800 operators they sound gay and ask for a date.

13. Sew anti-theft detector strips into people's backpacks.

14. Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.

15. Order a side of pork rinds with your fillet mignon.

16. Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.

17. Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climatic parts of rental movies.

18. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register.

19. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.

20. Repeat everything someone says as a question.

21. Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's road maps.

22. Inform everyone you meet of your personal Kennedy assassination, UFO, and OJ Simpson conspiracy theories.

23. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?", "What?", "Never mind , i t's gone now."

24. Light road flares on a birthday cake.

25. Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.

26. At the Laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.

27. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling as they read.

28. Ask people what gender they are.

29. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back in the tray.

30. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.

31. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.

32. Leave your Christmas lights up and lit until September.

33. Change your name to "John Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a."

34. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.

35. Chew on pens that you've borrowed.

36. Wear a lot of cologne.
37 . Listen to 33RPM records at 45RPM speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing."

38. Sing along at the opera.

39. Mow your lawn with scissors.

40. At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batabatabata-suhwing-batter!"

41. Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend."

42. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.

43. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."

44. Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.

45. Construct elaborate "crop circles" in your front lawn.

46. Make appointments for the 31st of September.

47. Invite lots of people to other people's parties.

48. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.

50. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.

51. Practice making fax and modem noises.

52. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc." them to your boss.

53. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophecy."

54. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.

55. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.

56. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.

57. Staple papers in the middle of the page.

58. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise.

59. Honk and wave to strangers.

60. TYPE ONLY IN UPPERCASE.

61. type only in lowercase.

62. dont use any punctuation either

63. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.

64. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "No, wait, I messed it up," and repea t.

65. Sing the theme to the Batman television show as loudly as you can, over and over and over..

66. Tell people their accent isn't fooling anyone.

67. Drum on every available surface.

68. Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.

69. Set alarms for random times.

70. Learn Morse code and have conversations with friends in public consisting of "Beeeep bip bip beeeep bip.."

71. Buy large quantities of mint dental floss just to lick the flavor off.

72. Leave your Nine Inch Nails tape in Great Uncle Ed's stereo, with the volume properly adjusted.

73. Dress only in clothes colored Hunter's Orange.

74. Wear your pants backwards.

75. Begin all your sentences with "Ohh la la!"

76. Rouse your roommates from slumber each morning with Lou Reed's "Metal Machine Music."

77. Leave someone's printer in compressed-italic-landscape mode.

78. Pay for your dinner with pennies.

79. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.

80. Repeat everything some one says, as a question.

81. Leave tips in Bolivian currency.

82. Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador."

83. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.

84. When Christmas caroling, sing "Jingle bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained.

85. Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One."

86. Finish the 99 bottles of beer song.

87. Sing the "This is the song that never ends" song from Lampchop's Play-Along.

88. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.

89. Pretend your mouse is a CB radio, and talk into it.

90. Drive half a block.

91. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.

92. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a southern drawl.

93. "Forget" the punch line to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot."

94. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, i nforming the curious that you don't want to fall off "in case the big o ne comes."

95. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers' brains, such as "Feliz Navidad," the Archies' "Sugar," or the Mr. Rogers theme song.

96. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.

97. Ask to "interface" with someone.

98. Incessantly recite annoying phrases, such as "sticky wicket isn't cricket."

99. Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a "magic picture."

100. Scuff your feet on a dry, shaggy carpet and seek out victims.

101. Never make eye contact.

102. Never break eye contact.

103. Construct your own pretend "tricorder," and "scan" people with it, pronouncing the results.

104. Give a play-by-play account of a person's every action in a nasal Howard Cossell voice.

105. Occasionally bark in a high-pitched voice.

106. S ay "okay, you're gay" to anything someone says.

107. As people talk, smell their shoulders.

108. When in a conversation, look out the window, then say "Wait, start over. I wasn't paying attention."

109. Say to people, "Did you wear deodorant today?"

110. Place your shoes on the table.

111. When talking to someone, look at a spot about two inches to their right.

112. When standing near a "high-class person," ask them, "Excuse me, but do I have a booger hanging on my nose? I thought I picked it off."

113. Switch your neighbor's lawn furniture with someone else's.

114. Call into work and tell them you have something better to do today.

115. Buy goldfish and ask the clerk if they come with chips.

116. Sample every flavor of ice cream and tell the clerk what you don't like about each one.

117. Pick your ear wax and ask if you could use their sleeve to wipe it off.

118. Insist completely ridiculous things are true - like Bush is still President.

119. Speak in a stron g Welsh accent.

120. Wear odd shoes.

121. Learn "Ice Ice Baby" by heart and recite it endlessly.

122. Disagree strongly with everything anybody says.

123. Throw stones at people walking past your house.

124. Keep changing the TV channel every two seconds.

125. Insist that Celine Dion is better than the Beatles.

126. Whenever anyone says something, laugh loudly as if they have just told and extremely funny joke.

127. Phone McDonald's and try to make a reservation for that evening.

128. Spend an entire weekend pretending you are R2-D2.

129. Phone random numbers and tell them you are holding their daughter hostage.

130. Recite the first 4,000 decimal places of Pi. Then ask if people want to hear it in binary, too.

131. Pretend you have gone completely deaf.

132. .sdrawkcab etirW

133. Walk into people's houses, go strai ght to the fridge without saying hello, and help yourself to their fo od.

134. Speak so quietly that people always have to get you to repeat it.

135. Loudly recite people's most embarrassing secrets in restaurants.

136. Play the electric guitar very loudly and badly, then when the neighbors ask you to turn it down, play even louder. When they come round to complain again, say, "Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you asked me to turn it up!

137. Try to fit the word "cornucopia" into every sentence you say.

138. Drive on the wrong side of the road.

139. Secretly learn to play the piano, then go to a friend's house who has a piano. Claim you've never played before then play Jesu Joy of Man's Desiring perfectly the first time. Then say, "I guess I must kinda be a natural."

140. Go canoeing and sing the Hawaii Five-0 theme.

141. Claim that until recently, you thought Michael Jackson was a woman.

142. Wear your cap backwards and say "Yo , wazzup?" a lot.

143. Go to a Metallica concert wearing a Mi chael Bolton T-Shirt.

144. Tell everyone you are Bill Clinton's cousin.

145. Take photos of people walking down the street and then run away.

146. Dedicate your life to politics, become president of the United States, then raise all taxes to 90.

147. Down a can of Coke in one drink and then burp loudly.

148. Insist that it was Bobby who shot J.R.

149. Bark like a dog whenever anyone says the word "the."

150. Wire up people's cars so the horn comes on as soon as their car is started.

151. Ride a unicycle to work.

152. E-mail Microsoft to tell them about bugs in Windows XP that aren't actually there.

153. Stare at people for about five minutes, making sure they know you're staring at them. Then, slowly sneak up to them while humming the Mission: Impossible theme. Sniff their head, then run away. Repeat.

154. Continuously mumble during a con versation.

155. Take off the eraser to every pencil in your house, or better yet, someone else's house.

156. When in a chat room, spell everything incorrectly.

157. Insist on "Weird Al" sing-a-longs.

158. On a hot summer day, ride up and down the road and drench pedestrians with squirt guns.

159. When walking down a main road, act like a drunk.

160. Wear nothing but white and go mud wrestling.

161. Walk up to someone eating. Lean over and stare at them intently until they notice. Continue to do so until they ask what you're doing. Reply, "I've been watching you eat for the last 30 seconds.. You're weird!" Leave the restaurant.

162. When walking, talk to yourself constantly.

163. Move people's bookmarks ahead three pages when they aren't looking.

164. Call the operator. When asked, "Can I help you?" reply, "No thanks, just browsing."

165. Go to a gumball machine insert coins until you have a matching pair o f fake eyeballs. After attaining these, record the theme song of T he Twilight Zone over and over again. Drive down the street wearing the eyeballs and playing The Twilight Zone theme very loud. When you get pulled over, leap into the passenger's seat and claim, "He was here a minute ago, officer!"

166. On a night other than Halloween, get a few friends together and dress like Jason from Friday the 13th. Have each of you stand a mile apart on a highway.

167. After visiting the local donut shop, sit on the floor cross-legged and insist in a childish voice that you haven't received enough chocolate sprinkles.

168. Push a raisin into someone's cream-filled donut. (I don't get this one.)

169. Spread fertilizer on half your neighbor's lawn.

170. Add A535 (liquid heat) to that little hole down the center of someone's anti-perspirant.

171.

172.

173. Add blank entries to lists, to make it look like it's longer.

174. Call every p ager number you know and leave the number for your local McDonald 's.

175. Wash and scrub the trees in your front lawn.

176. Throw newspapers back at paperboys.

177. Tell people their fly is down when they're wearing sweat pants.

178. Stand on a busy corner. Gasp, look and point up. See how many people look.

179. At random times in a conversation, say "Hi," "Hello Sir, how are you?" or "Have a good day, thank you."

180. Put electrical tape over the headlights of someone's car.

181. Walk up to random strangers insisting you are family.

182. Dress like a "High-class rich person" and wash windows at random street corners. Demand a dollar in a British accent.

183. When a cop pulls you over, when they step up to your car, drive forward slowly and make them walk. Especially if it's raining.

184. In an office, lock all the doors behind you.

185. Face the back when standing in an elevator.

186. Grin so wide it hurts your cheeks at every salesperson in town.

187. Wh en at an ATM, try to have a conversation with it, or pretend it stole your card. (This works best if there's a line.)

188. Unbend all the paperclips you can find, then replace every eraser you can find with a rubber band.

189. Ask people to prove everything they say. (e.g. "I'm Bob, nice to meet you..." "PROVE IT!")

190. Sharpen All your pencils to the same size EXACTLY.

191. Answer every question with another question. As soon as one of you says a statement instead of a question, shout "I win!".

192. Pose as a client at a bank or other professional institution, and when you are seated in front of their desk, keep rearranging the items on top into different patterns and tell them you are "just reorganizing things."

193. Instead of singing 99 bottles of beer on the wall, sing 999,999,999 bottles of beer on the wall!

194. Call every girl you know "dude".

195. Recit e every song from the Playstation games PaRappa the Rapper and U m Jammer Lammy.

196. Bring a portable CD player to a concert and listen the CD because you insist that it is "Just better quality"

197. Press the "power" button on on someone's computer or keyboard when they're almost finished typing up a long essay, story etc. Apologize sincerely, claiming that you thought it was the focus adjustment.

198. Call 911 and breathe heavily.

199. Take a shower. Feel guilty. Give it back.

200. Mow your carpet. (Or preferably somebody else's)

201. Vacuum your lawn. (See note on 200)

202. Recite shakespearian poetry to everyone you meet.

203. Go to McDonalds and ask for a BK Whopper.

204. Order a pizza and ask them if they can "please put the crust on top this time" in an exasperated voice.

205. Every time someone asks you to do something or says something to you ask "Is that a threat?"

206. When in an elevator, in di fferent voices, shout out random floors, and then watch as you get there, no one gets off.

207. Also, when riding up an elevator with a stranger, start singing a song that everyone knows, then expect them to start singing too. If they do not start singing, insist, "Everyone knows that song. Are you stupid?"

208. While walking make car noises loudly (Such as changing gears).

209. Whenever somebody says something, ask what the simplest word they said means. When they explain, ask what the simplest word in their explanation means. Repeat this for the entire conversation.

210. Go up to a someone and say, "Are you annoyed by irrelevant questions?" And then walk away very quickly.

211. Finish each sentence with "Monkey See, Monkey Do".

212. Click your mechanical pencils or your pens during a test in school.

213. Pretend you are invisible.

214. Convince people you are deaf and talk in an incredibly phony sign language.

215. S pend all day at a fast food restaurant and see how long it tak es before you have to pay for your "free" refills.

216. Continuously open your briefcase or bag and say into it, "Have you got enough air in there?"

217. While going down in an elevator scream, "AAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!! WE'RE GONNA DIE!!" for no apparent reason.

218. Call everyone a communist.

219. Explain "the little green men" in detail to someone, and when they don't believe you, accuse them of being one in disguise.

220.. Call your neighbors collect.

221. Whenever someone finishes a sentence say, "And then what happened?"

222. Page yourself over an intercom, but don't disguise your voice.

223. Send people annoying chain forwards with outrageous consequences like "If you don't send this to 300 people in 4 seconds you will die instantly" and then insist that it is true and it happened to your uncle.

224. When walking push an invisible cart and make loud squeaky noises.

225. Walk up to random people and ask them, ve ry seriously, "Do you know the muffin man?"

226. Clear your throat every three or four words while speaking.

227. Look at your hand in amazement and say, "Whoa, I never knew I had this!"

228. While driving if you see a "How am I driving" bumper sticker, call the number and inform the operator that the driver is doing a great job.

229. When driving with companions in the car, every few seconds slam on the brakes and insist that a squirrel ran in front of you.

230. When driving with companions in the car, every few seconds slam on the brakes and insist that a squirrel ran in front of you.

231. Whenever anybody says anything to you. Respond by saying, "I know."

232. Sending this list to all of your friends through email.

233. Continue to ask someone, "Is this annoying? Is this annoying?" over and over and over.

234. Tap someone on the shoulder repeatedly.
235. Begin every sentence with, "By the Gods!"

236. When you're in an argument, no matter what it's about, keep yelling "I don't see your name on it!".

237. When in public, pretend you are selling something in an infomercial.

238. At a restaurant, repeatedly send your food back for changes and after awhile insist that, "This isn't what I ordered!"

239. Go to a shoe store and try on every shoe, then say that you aren't interested in buying shoes and leave.

240. Put powdered sugar in your hair, sit down next to a stranger, and scratch your head a lot.

241. Turn on the Talk Radio Stations in your car, roll down your windows, and headbang.

242. Walk around with a plastic sword and shield and tell strangers "I must avenge the death of my father."

243. Scotch tape your door as an Anti-theft Device.

244. Super Glue quarters to floors.

245. Put the wrong date and year on the papers you hand in to your teachers.

246. Call random numbers and say "Hi, this is Julie from Bask en Robins. If you can name 31 flavors in 31 seconds you get a free scoop."

247. WRIGHT N AL CAPITOL LETERS AND MISSSSSPEL EVRYTHIND!!

248. Get two cell phones and talk to yourself on them in front of other people.

249. Make a loud and abrupt noise when nobody is looking, then face the other direction when everybody looks your way, pretending the sound came from behind you. (Thanks Alex)

250. Llend a book to someone, but staple the middle together.

251) Llend someone a book, but rip out the climax.

252) When making a list use the same number twice.

253) Spel easy wordds rong.

253) Pronunce people's names wrong everytime you meet them.

254) Laugh at everything they say.

255) Never laugh at what they say.

256) When talking to someone, tilt your head to the side.

257) Snicker at what someone said and say "I got the movie reference".

Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance that little indestructible black box is?
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
So what's the speed of dark?
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a Train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?
Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
Should women put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans?
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do . . . write to these men?
How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't live there?
If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the water?
Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food?
If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?
Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?
Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?
Why can't you find fresh sardines in the fish market?
Why do so many old people eat at cafeterias?
Why does an "X" stand for a kiss?
Why does the word "Filipino" start with the letter F ?
Why are the copyright dates on movies and television shows written in Roman numbers /
technically after midnight it's
morning, then why do we call it the middle of the night? shouldn't we call it
something like the early morning:-D- (By: RockstarLife)

_.s_s _ If you're a girl and you've ever
_s?_s_s³ _ beaten a guy in an arm wrestle,
_.s_ .s_ s³ _ copy the Flaming Heart of
_s³_.s_ .³ _ Youthfulness into your profile!
_..._... ... ... ._s³_ ³ _ (sorry girls only)
_s_s³_ ³,
_s_³s_..
_³s._³s ,
_³._³s .s_ ..
_._³_ s³
_³s_³s³_ s³
_³s_s_ s
_s._s³_.s ³_
_s..s ³_
_s.ss _
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_³§§§§§§§§§§§§§ss§§§§§§§§§§§§§³
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_³§³

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile.

13 things PMS Stands for:

13. Pass My Shotgun
12. Psychotic Mood Swing
11. Perpetual Munching Spree
10. Puffy Mid-Section
9. People Make me Sick
8. Provide Me with Sweets
7. Pardon My Sobbing
6. Pimples May Surface
5. Pass My Sweats
4. Pissy Mood Syndrome
3. Poor Men Suck
2. Pack My Stuff
1. Potential Murder Suspect

15 Things to do when you're in Walmart!
1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look
12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream... "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There's no toilet paper in here!"
15. Grab a lot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting, "Go, Pikachu, Go!"

Effective Ways On How To Annoy/Scare/Weird Out The Living Daylights Outta People (on elevators, in computer labs, etc.)
1. Repeat everything the person says in a question.
2. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World." incessantly.
3. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"
4. Offer nametags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
5. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
6. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, and then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
7. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.
8. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.
9. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"
10. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh no, not now, damn motion sickness!"
11. Meow occasionally. (Brian can do this and actually sound like a real cat... him and bolly started speaking cat back and forth and it was hysterical!)
12. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.
13. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
14. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
15. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.
16. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask, "Is that your beeper?"
17. Say "Ding!" at each floor.
18. Say, "I wonder what all these do." and push the red buttons.
19. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
20. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."
21. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
22. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
23. Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers.
24. Stop at every floor, run off the elevator, then run back on.
25. Ask every passenger that goes up if you can press the button for them.
26. Log on to a computer, wait a sec, then get a frightened look on your face and scream: "Oh my God! They've found me!" and bolt.
27. Laugh uncontrollably for about 3 minutes & then suddenly stop and look suspiciously at everyone who looks at you.
28. When your computer is turned off, complain to the monitor on duty that you can't get the dang thing to work. After he/she's turned it on, wait 5 minutes, turn it off again, & repeat the process for a good half hour.
29. Type frantically, often stopping to look at the person next to you evilly.
30. Bring a chain saw, but don't use it. If anyone asks why you have it, say "Just in case..." mysteriously.
31. Every time you press Return and there is processing time required, pray "Ohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease," and scream "YES!" when it finishes.
32. If you're sitting in a swivel chair, spin around singing "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" whenever there is processing time required.
33. Print out the complete works of Shakespeare, and then when it's all done (two days later) say that all you wanted was one line.
34. Put a large, gold-framed portrait of the British Royal Family on your desk and loudly proclaim that it inspires you.
35. Send e-mails constantly to the person next to you.
36. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.
37. Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
38. Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.
39. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"
40. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.
41. Ask, "Did you feel that?"
42. Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.
43. Swat at flies that don't exist.
44. Dance, while drumming noisily against the walls.

If you are against drunk driving please copy this onto your profile!

If you think child abuse is wrong and needs to stop, copy and paste this into your profile.

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cellphone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn't care if people call her weird (it's a compliment),who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Twilight, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone.:HarryArtemis1220, edwardcullenissosexy, all-hail-the-jello, justrememberhe prefersbrunets

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject

If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile

If you have ever been so obsessed with Twilight that whenever you hear thunder you think of vampires playing baseball.

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder

if you are addicted to copy and pastes, copy and paste this into your profile!

A good friend picks you up when you fall, a best friend picks you up and then trips you again."

A good friend will comfort you when he breaks up with you. A BEST friend will call him, whispering "Seven days..."

Don't follow in my footsteps, I tend to walk into walls

"We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police do."

When I hear somebody sigh "Life is hard" I'm always tempted to ask "Compared to what?"

I am going to put an end to my procrastination problem. . . Tomorrow

"I am amazed at radio DJ's today. I am firmly convinced that AM on my radio stands for Absolute Moron. I will not begin to tell you what FM stands for."

"When there's a will, I want to be in it."

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.

Here's a toast -- To those who challenge us to mind games, but forget to bring their equipment!

Some people are like Slinkies. They're really good for nothing. But they still really bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.

Too many people smoke marijuana. If you don't, copy this into your profile.

If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you have ever shouted out the first thing that comes to mind, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have ever shouted out random thing and then gotten glared at copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have sudden mood changes out of nowhere copy and paste this into your profile

If you hate flamers that point out every single little detail that is wrong in their eyes, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever walked into a window copy this onto your profile

Eighty percent of Americans don't smoke. If you're one of that eighty percent, copy and paste this into your profile. (And PROUD of it!)

Even when you cant see Him, GOD is there! if you believe in GOD put this in your profile.

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are against fur coats, clothing, boots, etc, and the people who kill the animals but don't use the meat copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever thought about something when you were talking about something else, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever done homework, were reading a story on fanfiction, were writing a story for fanfiction, were talking to a friend, and were watching TV at the same time, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever wished you could talk to animals or be an animal, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hate those irritating mosquitos giving you mosquito bites, copy this in your profile.

If you think that Writer's Block blows (sucks), copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

If you have a ridiculously long profile, copy and paste this onto your profile to make it longer.

If you are bored and like to write stuff, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever lost someone you loved, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are in lala land most of the time copy this into your profile.

If you blame a failing grade on A) the teacher hating you, B) being Confunded, C) anything but the fact that you didn't study, copy this into your profile.

If you don't have a myspace and you don't want a myspace, copy this into your profile.

you are so cool that you actually read through all of these (there's more MWHAHAHAHA!!), copy this into your profile!

If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you enjoy copying and pasting these copy and paste thingys, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?

Boy: No

Girl: Do you like me?

Boy: No

Girl: Do you want me?

Boy: No

Girl: Would you cry if I left?

Boy: No

Girl: Would you live for me?

Boy: No

Girl: Would you do anything for me?

Boy: No

Girl: Choose--me or your life

Boy: My life

The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...

The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.

The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.

The reason I don't want you is because I need you.

The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.

The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.

The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.

The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.

If you find this incredibly cute and touching, copy and paste it into your profile.

When people don't laugh at our jokes we don't think of it as a "You had to be there." type of thing. But more like a "You have to be mentally retarded like us." type of thing

Having the love of your life say, "we can still be friends", is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.

Parents spend the first part of a child's life teaching them to walk and talk. The second half is teaching them to sit down and shut up

"The dinosaurs extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide."

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people

A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. But a best friend will go up to him and say "It's because you're gay isn't it?"

Tell the truth and run.

All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.

When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.

Education is important, school however, is another matter.

I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if you aim right.

A best friend is the type of person who can see you with the biggest smile on your face.. and still know something's wrong.

One for the Girls!!
1) A couple is lying on the bed. The man says, "I'm going to make you the happiest woman alive." the woman replies, "I'll miss you..."
2) Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods; Because Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN.
3) What does it mean if a man is in your bed gasping for breath and screaming your name? You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.

Don't knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.

I'm not paranoid... WHICH ONE OF MY ENEMIES TOLD YOU THIS?!

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried

Flying is simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Recent studies show that 92 percent of teenagers have moved on to rap. If you're part of the 8 percent that stayed with rock, put this in your profile

If you easily finish one novel a day, copy/paste onto profile.

You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it

Beware! For my place of employment has given me a NEW weapon...THE BUBBLE WRAP!

90 of teens today would die if MySpace was destroyed. If you are one of the 10 that would be laughing, copy and paste this to your profile.

(\_/)
(o.o) This is Bunny. Copy Bunny to your signature

"Boys are like purses: cute, full of crap and can always be replaced"

"Where am I to go, now that I've gone too far?"

"You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometime you just might find, you get what you need"

"Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone."

"My best friends are the kind that if my house were on fire, they'd be roasting marsh mellows and flirting with the firemen,"

"Good friends will pick you up when your down, BEST FRIENDS will push you back down and laugh"
"Good friends ask why you're crying, BEST FRIENDS already have the shovel ready to bury the loser that made you cry"
"Good friends will bail you out of jail, BEST FRIENDS will be sitting right there next to you going, 'Damn That was freakin awesome',"
Good friends will say you can do better, BEST FRIENDS will call him up and say "You have seven days to live"
"Good friends will help you with your drug problem, BEST FRIENDS are the ones who sold it to you,"
Good friends will help you move, BEST FRIENDS will help you move a dead body"
"A best friend can look at you with a smile on your face and ask 'What's wrong?'"

If you are addicted to vampires and would like to become one, post this onto your profile. Only a vegetarian, like the Cullens! I don't want to eat people!

You know your addiction to Twilight is getting dangerous when you've added "Volterra" to your computer's dictionary. If you have done just that, copy this into your profile. (And multiple other Twilight words. Volturi, Carlisle, Irina, etc.) (note: none of those Twilight words showed up as misspelled.)

If you are absolutely in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional character Edward, from Twilight, copy and paste this into your profile

I read New Moon and I wanted to kick Jacob Black REALLY REALLY HARD

You know you're obsessed with Twilight when:
You start going up to random people to tell them you want an Edward!
You think your next-door neighbor looks like a vampire, or he really is a vampire.
You try to control your thoughts because Edward might hear them.
You've read Twilight, New Moon and Eclipse at least 5 times each!
You check on this site 5 times (or more) a day to see if there's any new Twilight news.
You think your best friend's crazy for not reading Twilight, New Moon, and/or Eclipse.
When you see a box labeled "Forks", you think there's something imported from Forks, Washington in there.
Twilight has ruined any and all future reading for you.
You use Twilight for every single school project that pops up.
You break up with your boyfriend because he doesn't glitter in the sun like Edward.
You have nothing to do, so you go to www.stepheniemeyer.com and read everything on the site twice. And then go to the Lexicon and do the same thing.
You promise your friend that if he can find you an Edward, you'll give him the answers to your homework for the rest of your school-life.
You plan on naming your children after characters in any of the books in the Twilight series.
You walk around school looking for pale-skinned, inhumanly beautiful classmates with red or gold eyes.
You see a shadow, think it's Edward, and start talking to it.

IF YOU LOVE EDWARD CULLEN, COPY AND PASTE THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE AND SCREAM! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

If you get super upset and throw a fit until all the people in the room run away whenever someone says that the characters of Twilight aren't real, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped on air, and were so happy because you thought Edward Cullen might come and save you, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have a long list of fictional book/ movie characters that you are in love with, but Edward Cullen is clearly at the top of, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you cried when Edward left Bella in New Moon copy and paste this onto your profile. (I cried really hard and for like the entire book... until he came back)

If you've ever fallen asleep at around 2 am reading Twilight , New Moon, and/or Eclipse, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you agree with Bella that life without Edward is useless then copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are so obsessed with Twilight that it is NOT even funny anymore, copy this onto your profile

If whenever you see or hear the name "Edward" you freak out and have a small fit because you love him so much, and then people stare at you, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think Edward Cullen is hot...copy and paste this onto your profile

If you've reread TWILIGHT over ten times...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are so obsessed with Twilight that you now have a built in Volvo radar, copy this into your profile

If you think Stephenie Meyer is one of the best writers in existence, copy this into your profile.

If you think that the Twilight series will rule the universe, copy this into your profile.

If you think that Bella and Edward were meant to be together, copy this into your profile!

I have read Twilight/New Moon/Eclipse more than 8 times...wow I love those flaming books... and I'm Team Edward 100 percent!

Boys are like slinkeys... useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs (except Edward Cullen of course!!)

Come over to the good side, we have Edward Cullen and chocolate!

Huh... It figures, all the good guys are taken, vampires, or both (and I'm looking at you Edward!)

If you know you have an unhealthy obsession with any or all of the Cullens, but you don't really care because you don't want to heal quite frankly, post this. (I admit it, I'm overly obsessed, but I don't care!)

If you have Twilight/New Moon/ Eclipse memorized, post this.

If you completely got over your Harry Potter obsession when you read Twilight, copy and paste this on your program

If you cried when Edward left Bella in New Moon copy and paste this onto your profile. (I did cry...but I also screamed NO EDWARD! YOU CAN'T LEAVE!)

If whenever you see or hear the brand "Volvo" you freak out and start giggling uncontrollably and then people stare at you funny copy and paste this onto your profile

Guys should be like Edward-rich, strong, and hot.(vampires)

Thanks Stephenie now I will NEVER get a man.

Edward Cullen I love you! Oops! Did I say that out loud?

Twilight: Because a small part inside of us broke when we realized our boyfriends weren't mythical monsters

If you read the Twilight series, and afterward wanted to do a large number of bad things to Jacob, copy and paste this onto your profile ;)

AACIBD is Addicted to All Cullen's Including Bella Disorder.
AV is Addicted to Vampires- if you have either of these copy and paste into ur pro

If people mistake you for a vampire (cough cough or you are one cough cough)...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile. (twilight caused it...)

I have read New Moon and Eclipse and when i did i wanted to kick Jacob Black REALLY REALLY hard!

When it comes to Twilight, I'm BxE all the way, baby!! There's a reason it's illegal!!

-If you are so obsessed with Twilight that its not even funny anymore, copy this into your profile

-If you think that AV means Addicted to Vampires, copy and paste this to your profile.

-If you are absolutely in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional character Edward, from Twilight, copy and paste this into your profile

-IF YOU LOVE EDWARD AND ALICE AND ALL THE GANG, COPY THIS TO YOUR PROFILE!!

-If you read/ wanted to read Twilight, New Moon, and Eclipse before hearing about the movie, and all the hype about it, copy this into your profile.

If you are obsessed with Twilight, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you can quote Stephanie Meyer's literary works like me, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have read Eclipse, and believe that Jacob was a jerk to Bella for making her choose, then copy and paste this into your profile.

If someone mentions Twilight, you can go on for hours talking about it, copy this to your profile.

If you are so obsessed with Twilight that it is NOT even funny anymore, copy this into your profile

If you think Mike Newton should be run over by a bus copy and paste this into your profile

If you think that bus should also take out Eric copy and paste this into your profile

If you are Twilight obsessed, copy and paste this into your profile

If you you think Edward is frickin HOT copy + paste this into your profile

If you think Edward is perfect for Bella, paste this onto your profile

If you hate Jacob Black and thinks that he needs to get pushed off a cliff, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hate Mike and you're not afraid to say it, paste this into your profile

If you think Jessica can be annoying paste this into your profile

If you think Jessica and Mike belong together because they're both annoying and stupid, paste this into your profile

After you have read Twilight, if you are proud that you have eaten dirt before like Edward ate human food, copy and paste this on your profile.

Bella: "It's...a cow."
Edward: "No, Bella. It's a dinosaur. Of course it's a cow!"
Bella: "You...want me to eat it?"
Edward: "No. I want you to throw a stick at it and see if it brings it back."
Bella: "Feeling a little sarcastic today?"
Edward: "Just a bit."

You know you're obsessed with Twilight when... (All apply to me!!)
1) You have read both Twilight, New Moon, and Eclipse at least 3 times.
2) You own the above mentioned books.
3) You know that they're totally going to screw up Twilight the Movie, and you want to see it anyway.
4) You have read everything on every page of Stephanie Meyer's web site.
5) You have reread a lot of these pages.
6) You read fanfiction about Twilight.
7) You write fanfiction about Twilight.
8) At one point or another, you have had a screen name/username that says something about Twilight or its characters.
9) You constantly count the days until Breaking Dawn comes out.
10) For a long while after you read Twilight/New Moon/Eclipse, you acted as a missionary for the books, asking everyone you talked to if the had read them.
11) If said people have not read Twilight, you insist that they read it, because it is, and I quote, "the best book ever".
12) If anyone says something that goes against the statement that Twilight is the best book on the planet, you immediately start to argue with them.
13) You stand firm by your belief that anyone who says that Twilight is just a crappy, unrealistic love story (and yes, believe it or not, I do know someone who has said this!) should be taken to the edge of a cliff and pushed off.
14) For months after you read it, Twilight was your favorite subject to talk about.
15) When you found out you would have to wait until August of 2008 for Breaking Dawn to come out, you almost cried.
16) You argue with your friends over which member of the Cullen family you like best.
17) You began reading fanfiction as a desperate attempt to read something about Twilight, when you had already finished the books.
18) No matter how many times you read Twilight or Twilight-related stories, you never get tired of it.
19) As you read this list, you are smiling and nodding at almost every thing you read.
20) Even though you know it's impossible, you often wish that you were a vampire.
21) Vampires are officially your favorite mythical creature ever.
22) Your personal motto is, vampires are cool, not scary.
23) You know that you are not crazy for being obsessed with Twilight; people who don't understand it just haven't read the book.
24) When you hear that someone read Twilight and didn't like it or thought it was stupid, you just shake your head and sigh.
26). You literally haunt Stephenie Meyer's website waiting for new information
27). You're driving your parents mad with your crazy countdowns
28). You're keeping track of all the "Breaking Dawn Quotes of the Day" and trying to figure out what they all mean. (Yes, and they're driving me CRAZY!! I want to read it even more... Rub it in, Stephenie...)
29). Your home page is Stephenie Meyer's website (at one point, it wasn't, but it is now -evil laugh-)
30). Your desktop has something to do with the Twilight Series (It is now! I changed it! -evil laugh- My background and start bar are dark red and this drawing of Rosalie is over the top of it! It's based off of the story Rose told in Chapter 7 of Eclipse. Note: that piece of art is not mine, but I wish it was! If you like it, go to this website to see more!)
31). Your screen saver reads "Breaking Dawn: August 2, 2008" (nope. My screen saver is bubbles... But you can still see my background behind them XD)
32). You have both the original New Moon book and the New Moon Special Edition
33). You put your Eclipse poster in plain view so that everyone can see it
34). You can't believe that most people haven't read the books
35). You know all the characters so well that you feel as if you could write your own stories about them
36). You spend most of your day making up "What if...?" questions about all the different plot lines (of course, that's how fan fiction makes it's living, lol)
37). You've actually read the play "Romeo & Juliet" just so you could find out how Jacob would die (actually, I read it because it was a requirement for my English class. ...But I did know how Jacob would die!)
38). You know you're addicted, but you don't care (Nope, don't care. Twilight is addictive; I have to have my fix XD)
39). You can't help saying, "I can't wait for August 2nd!" while everyone who isn't "in the know" stares at you like you're psycho
40). You're more excited about the release of Breaking Dawn than anything to do with Harry Potter
41). When you found out about Midnight Sun you had yet another mental breakdown (yeah; I did. Edward wouldn't have been able to read my thoughts there; I stopped thinking and breathing for a second. Then I practically screamed and then proceeded to tell all my Twilight-a-holic friends about it)
42). You noticed there is no number 25 (no, I didn't and I feel stupid about it...)

If you swear that you will throw yourself off a building if they cast a bad Edward and/or Bella, copy this to your profile. (But I'll revise that: I will throw the director off a building if the cast is bad; I'm waiting for the movie to judge)

If you compare people to Edward or Bella, copy this to your profile.

IIf you love Edward more than Bella, post this on your profile.

Ok, this is going to sound way obsessed with Twilight, When you read the good reviews about Twilight on the back cover and your heart soars, post this on your profile.

Jacob Black glared at the children dressed as vampires and he knew it wasn't right but he lied and told them there was no candy left anyway.

Bella saw the children dressed as werewolves and vampires trading candy and laughing and wondered why couldn't it be like that in real life.

If you constantly have 'I love Edward Cullen' rants, copy and paste this into your profile

If you wish you were Bella Swan, copy and paste this into your profile (I don't really wish I was her, but I wouldn't mind some of the perks -cough- Edward -cough-)

If you have gotten more than three of your friends addicted to Twilight, copy and paste this into your profile (so far, I think the count is 5)

If you slap anyone who tells you that Edward Cullen is not real, copy and paste this into your profile (Don't let my appearance fool you; I will slap/cyber slap anyone who tells me he isn't real. XD)

If you don't hate Jacob Black (like everyone else seems to), copy and paste this into your profile (I don't hate him, but he and Bella don't go together. Sorry Jacob fans!)

If you have stayed up half the night reading Twilight/New Moon/Eclipse, copy and paste this into your profile

IF EDWARD AND BELLA DONT STAY TOGETHER I'M GONNA HURT SOMEONE! Repost this if you agree

If you think Jacob should just stay a friend and have a happy ending copy and paste this into your profile.

"Love is complicated, so I'll just support fictional love and fall in love with fictional characters. They'll never break my heart"

"Join the Vampires we have Edward Cullen."

One day Mrs. Jones went to have a talk with the minister at the local church. "Reverend," she said, "I have a problem: my husband keeps falling asleep during your sermons. It's very embarrassing. What should I do?"

"I have an idea," said the minister. "Take this hatpin with you. I will be able to tell when Mr. Jones is sleeping, and I will motion to you at specific times. When I motion, you give him a good poke in the leg."

In church the following Sunday, Mr. Jones dozed off. Noticing this, the preacher put his plan to work. "And who made the ultimate sacrifice for you?" he said, nodding to Mrs. Jones.

"Jesus!" Jones cried as his wife jabbed him the leg with the hatpin.

"Yes, you are right, Mr. Jones," said the minister. Soon, Mr. Jones nodded off again. Again, the minister noticed. "Who is your redeemer?" he asked the congregation, motioning towards Mrs. Jones.

"God!" Mr. Jones cried out as he was stuck again with the hatpin.

"Right again," said the minister, smiling. Before long, Mr. Jones had winked off again. However, this time, the minister did not notice. As he picked up the tempo of his sermon, he made a few motions that Mrs. Jones mistook as signals to bayonet her husband with the hatpin again.

The minister asked, "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore him his 99th son?"

Mrs. Jones poked her husband, who yelled, "You stick that goddamned thing in me one more time and I'll break it in half and shove it up your ass!"

"Amen," replied the congregation.

XoX

Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as possible. These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods..

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time?)Whose body?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(hmm..something must have gotten lost in the translation..

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(but no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one..

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this.)

On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)

Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee getting bigger?" Then it hits me.

Whoever said, "Nothing's impossible," never tried slamming a revolving door.

Being mature is overrated.

Slinky + Escalator = Endless fun!

One out of four people is insane. Look at three of your friends. If it's not them, it's you.

When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip 'n slide!

"What you're looking for is always in the last place you look" Well, DUH, smart one! After you find it, you stop looking!

Whose cruel idea was it to put "S" in the word "Lisp"?

A Real Boyfriend

When she stares at your mouth

Kiss her

When she pushes you or hits you like a dumb ass cuz she thinks shes stronger than you

Grab her and dont let go

When she starts cursing at you tryin to act all tuff

Kiss her and tell her you love her

When she's quiet

Ask her whats wrong

When she ignores you

Give her your attention

When she pulls away

Pull her back

When you see her at her worst

Tell her she's beautiful

When you see her start crying

Just hold her and dont say a word

When you see her walking

Sneak up and hug her waist from behind

When she's scared

Protect her

When she steals your favorite hat

Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night

When she teases you

Tease her back and make her laugh

When she doesn't answer for a long time

reassure her that everything is okay

When she looks at you with doubt

Back yourself up

When she says that she likes you

SHE REALLY DOES MORE THAN YOU COULD UNDERSTAND!

When she grabs at your hands

Hold her's and play with her fingers

When she bumps into you;

bump into her back and make her laugh

When she tells you a secret

keep it safe and untold

When she looks at you in your eyes

dont look away until she does

When she says it's over

she still wants you to be hers

When she reposts this bulletin

she wants you to read it

- Stay on the phone with her even if she's not saying anything.

- When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go

- When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her

- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you

- Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her

- Treat her like she's all that matters to you.

- Stay up all night with her when she's sick.

- Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think it's stupid.

- Give her the world.

- Let her wear your clothes.

- When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.

- Let her know she's important.

- Kiss her in the pouring rain.

If you do post this in the next four minutes the one you love will :

Call you.

Kiss you.

Love you.

Text you.

Guys post as: "I'd be this Boyfriend."

Girls post as: "A real Boyfriend."

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...

Post this on your profile if you hate racism

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.

Sticks and Stones may scar my skin but words slice through my soul within

Some people are like Slinkies. They're really good for nothing. But they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.

Boys are like trees - they take 50 years to grow up

"Wal-Mart, do they, like, sell walls there?" - Paris Hilton

I have read New Moon and Eclipse and when i did i wanted to kick Jacob Black REALLY REALLY hard! (then i said screw that, I might as well just kill him, and then he says I can kill vampires you know, I'll just say... Bet you wish you were a vampire now...)

I ran with scissors, and lived!

In the battle between you and the world, bet on the world.

Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped.

There is an island of opportunity in the middle of every difficulty.
Miss that, though, and you're pretty much doomed.

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

For every winner, there are dozens of losers. Odds are you're one of them.

When life gives you lemons, alter their DNA and make SUPER LEMONS!

Someday my prince will come he just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is to stubborn to ask for directions.

"REMEMBER WHEN"

REMEMBER WHEN ..
getting HiGH meant swinging at a playground?
the worst thing you could get from a boy was c0otiEs?
when )m 0 m( was your hero
and 'D a D' was the boy you were gonna marry?
when your W0RST ENEMiES were your siblings
and rAcE iSsuEs were about who ran fastest?
when - WAR- was a card game
and life was simple and care free?
remember when all you wanted to do
WAS GROW UP?

Put This In Your Profile If You're Still 5 Inside...No Matter How Old You Are Now

If you want Bella to turn into a vampire, copy and paste this into your profile

92 oF teens moved to pop and hip hoP music ...
if you're one of the 8 that rock out everyday, put this on ur profile ...

95 percent of teenagers care about popularity. If you like pretzels, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're a fan of Edward Cullen, save a cow, eat a lion.

If you're a fan of Bella Swan, then you've got issues, girl.

If you cried when Edward left Bella in New Moon, Copy and paste this to your profile

If you think that disclaimers are the most annoying things EVER Copy and paste this to your profile

If you've ever burst into song for no reason Copy and paste this to your profile

If you think that Twilight is the best book know to woman... (And man!) Copy/paste this into your profile.

If you've reread Twilight over 4 times...copy/paste this into your profile.

If, when you have a boy, you'll seriously consider naming him Edward...copy/paste this into your profile

If, when you have a girl, you'll seriously consider naming her Isabella...copy/paste this into your profile

If you have ever been so obsessed with Twilight, that whenever you hear thunder, you think of vampires playing baseball...copy/paste this into your profile.

If you are counting the days until Breaking Dawn comes out...copy/paste this into your profile.

If you are willing to admit that you are absolutely in love with Edward Cullen, a completely fictional character(HE IS NOT FICTONAL PEOPLE!! gawd. how many people do i have to tell that to?) ...copy/paste this into your profile

If you truly believe that there is an Edward Cullen out there somewhere for you (his name doesn't have to be Edward)...copy/paste this into your profile.

If you have ever heard the voices of the characters of the book you're reading in your head...copy/paste this into your profile.

If you have ever fallen out of a chair backwards...copy/paste this into your profile.

If you've ever tripped over a WATCH YOUR STEP sign...copy/paste this into your profile.

If, for no reason, you have laughed at a part in a movie that really wasn't funny...copy/paste this into your profile.

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive seconds...copy/paste this into profile.

If you've ever tried putting your hair behind your ears, and ended up poking yourself in the eye...copy/paste this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a mirror...copy/paste this into your profile.

If every locker you have ever had hates you and wouldn't open up for you...copy/paste this into your profile.

If whenever you see a silver Volvo and you start to scream "Edward", copy and paste this in your profile

If you are in love with a Twilight character, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you flip whenever you see someone reading a Twilight series book and you want to talk to them all about it, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you are Team Edward, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you took the time to read all of these (and you usually do), copy and paste this onto your profile

If you have ever thought of something funny, started laughing, and fell & hit your head on something hard, and ended up laughing harder than you were before, copy and paste this into your profile.

If someone mentions Twilight, you can go on for hours talking about it, copy this to your profile.

If you are so obsessed with Twilight that it is NOT even funny anymore, copy this into your profile.

If whenever you see or hear the name "Edward" you freak out and have a small fit because you love him so much, and then people stare at you, copy and paste this into your profile.

If your friends are considering torturing you because you won't shut up about the Twilight series, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

Put this in your profile if you didn't know the ABC's song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star had the same tune...

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile

If you are crazy and proud of it copy and paste this onto your profile.

If someone has ever said something to you that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy this into your pro if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "Where to begin?"

If you are in lala land most of the time copy this into your profile.

If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your profile

If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself/someone else, copy this into your profile.

If you have inside jokes...with yourself...copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that losers hate/don't get Twilight, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you think the semi-colon is completely useless, stupid, annoying and plotting to destroy the English language as we know it, put this in your pro!

If you think rock paper scissors solves everything then put this in your profile!

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile

92 percent of American teens would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would be laughing your ass off.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

98 percent of teenagers do or have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.

If you have ever not known where you were when there was a sign right next to you, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever tripped over air, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile

If you're random, and proud of it, post this onto your profile.

If you have ever walked into the men's toilets instead of the ladies or vice versa, paste this onto your profile.

ADHD is Automatic Death by Hyperness Disorder.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile

If you have an odd sort of love/hate relationship with your computer, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.

If when you have a child, you'd consider naming them Edward or Anthony, copy this into your profile.

If at least once a week, someone misspells or mispronounces your last name...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think those stupid kids should just give the rabbit the freakin' Trix, copy this into your profile

If you think the Coca-coca Puff Turky-Bird thing should go to rehab, copy this into your profile.

If you think that the kids should stop chasing Lucky and leave the leprechaun alone, then copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think Fred should just let Barney have the freakin' Coco Pebbles and stop chasing him, then copy and paste this in your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

If you agree with Bella that her/your life without Edward is useless then copy this to your profile.

If you have ever missed your mouth when trying to take a sip of water, copy and paste this into your profile

You know your addiction to Twilight is getting dangerous when you've added "Volterra" to your computer's dictionary. If you have done just that, copy this into your profile.

IF YOU LOVE EDWARD CULLEN, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE AND SCREAM!

If you have ever tripped up the stairs, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile.

If one of your best friends IS insane, copy this into your profile.

If you adore chocolate and frequently suffer from chocolate cravings while you have no access to the heavenly substance, copy this into your profile.

If you think being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this to your profile.

If you and your friends have nicknames, titles, or anything else for each other copy this to your profile.

If there are times where you wanna annoy people, just for the heck of it copy this to your profile.

If you like Subway, copy this onto your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you spend multiple hours a day reading or writing or a combination of both, copy this onto your profile.

If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

If you think you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" thingies, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are totally confused right now copy this onto your profile.

98 percent of teenagers do drugs and alcohol. If you like bagels, copy this into your profile.

93 percent of teenagers would have an emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you are part of the 7 percent that would say "What was your first clue?” copy this onto your profile.

If you have ever walked into a wall, copy this onto your profile

If you've read Twilight, New Moon, and Eclipse over four times, copy this onto your profile

If you have read past 2 in the morning, copy this onto your profile

If you are planning on mobbing Stephenie Meyer's publisher because you want Breaking Dawn NOW, copy this onto your profile and get your pitchforks

If you get ticked and throw a fit until all the people in the room leave because someone said the characters of Twilight aren't real, copy this onto your profile

If you are addicted to copy and pastes, copy and paste this into your profile

People who say anything's possible haven't tried to slam a revolving door

If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do

If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this is your profile

If you've had at least two friends move away from you...copy and paste this onto your profile.

When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.

We fall for stupid boys we make lots of dumb mistakes we like to act stupid, talk really fast, and laugh really loud. But us teenager grls, we're really going at one thing, staying strong.

I only have PMS on days that end in the letter "y".

If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile.

You're just jealous because the voices in my head talk to me and not you.

I don't suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it.

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

IF EDWARD AND BELLA DONT STAY TOGETHER I'M GONNA STAB SOMEONE! Repost this if you agree

I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.

I don't obsess! I think intensely.

All the good ones are either gay, married, vampires or fictional characters in books or movies.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever lost someone you loved, copy and paste this onto your profile.

AACIBD is Addicted to All Cullen’s including Bella Disorder.

AV is Addicted to Vampires

When you get caught looking at him, just remember, he was looking back!

My night in shining armour turned out to be a loser in aluminium foil.

Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most.

Before you criticize some one, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you’re a mile away and you still have their shoes.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.

One day we will look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.

I smile because I have no idea what’s going on.

Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

Dear Heart, I met a boy today, prepare to shatter.

I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive.

I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers

I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good either.

If you think Edward Cullen is the cutest boy on the planet copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think Edward Cullen is hot...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think iPods were gifts from the gods copy and paste this onto your profile

If you're a proud stalker and obsessed love-struck girl of Edward Anthony Cullen, copy this into your profile.

If you think that only losers hate/don't get Twilight, copy this into your profile.

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what you are doing that is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you memorize the complete biographies and physical traits of every character in Twilight (or almost, at least). Crazy is when you write Emmett or Edward Cullen is hot on your homework instead of doing it. Crazy is when you call everyone in the phone book that has the last name Cullen. Crazy is when you honestly belive Edward exists. Crazy is when you throw a brick at someone after they told you vampires, werewolves, and Edward Anthony Masen Cullen are/is fictional. If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile and add something crazy you've done to the list!

If you went to sleep at around 2 am reading Twilight and/or New Moon, copy and pastes this onto your profile.

If you are absolutely in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional character Edward, from twilight, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

If you think the human identification thing when you log in to fan fiction is annoying, copy and past this into your profile.

If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile.

You laugh, I laugh. You cry, I cry. You hurt, I hurt. You jump off a bridge, I get a paddle boat and save your stupid a--.

I called your boyfriend gay, and he hit me with his purse.

Emmett Cullen: Stronger Than You since 1916

Jasper Hale: Charming Ladies since 1843

Alice Cullen: Quirkier than You since 1901

Rosalie Hale: Better Than You since 1916

Edward Cullen: Sexier, hotter and spicier Than You since 1901

I read Eclipse and I wanted to kick Jacob Black REALLY REALLY HARD

OMC-Since Edward is a perfect angel, and God created angels, and Carlisle created Edward, into a vampire, so God is Carlisle. That and every one of us woke up, saw Carlisle, and thought he was God.

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile (Hee hee, Twilight...)

If condements hate you, copy and paste this onto you profile.

If Clingwrap hates you, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've yelled at inanimate objects for being mean copy and paste this onto your profile.

You know what makes letting go of a crush so hard? The fear that the moment you let go, they'll catch on.

It's true, Edward Cullen prefers brunettes. Sorry, Barbie you aren't Bella, and Edward isn't your Ken.

Jacob Black glared at the children dressed as vampires and he knew it wasn't right but he lied and told them there was no candy left anyway.

On a package of peanuts: open package, eat nuts. (What were you supposed to do? Throw them at the people sitting near you?)

On a child's Superman costume: Warning: Wearing this garment does not enable you to fly. (I blame the parents for that one)

There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosives.

I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.

I live in my own little world- but it's ok, they know me there.

The dinosaurs' extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all commited suicide

You know you live in 2008 when...

1.) You accidentaly enter your password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years.

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they dont have a screenname or myspace.

4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV.

6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.

7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5 isn't there.

10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.

12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did

Lessons Learned in Twilight:

1. You can enjoy the banquet while resisting the wine.
2. The future is not set in stone.
3. Men are crabby when they're hungry.
4. Nothing beats an irritable grizzly bear.
5. True love knows no boundaries.
6. Some people are just danger magnets.
7. Even eternal enemies can work together to save something they love.
8. Forget the fangs - real vampires sparkle!
9. Soul mates exist, even if it takes 100 years to find them.
10. Porshe 911 Turbos make really great bribes.
11. Friendship is like the sun on a cloudy day.
12. Snow just means it's too cold for rain.
13. Family is about more than just blood.
14. What's worth doing is worth over-doing.
15. Losing your temper can be hair-raising.
16. "Vegetarian" has many meanings.
17. Even monsters can hold on to their humanity.
18. There are exceptions to every rule.
19. Always verify bad news before doing something stupid.
20. Hearing voices in your head doesn't necessarily mean you're crazy.
21. Love means being willing to sacrifice your happiness for another's.
22. Cold hands = Warm heart.
23. Not breathing is uncomfortable.
24. Stupid lambs and masochistic lions make quite a pair.
25. Romeo was an idiot.
26. Twilight is the saddest and safest time of day.
27. Extreme sports should not be attempted alone.
28. Life is worth very little without someone to share it with.
29. Space heaters can be very annoying.
30. Love can make even the most miserable places paradise.

Why America has some issues (Yes, I live there, but tough. These are all clever.)

1. Only in
America...can a pizza get to your house faster than an
ambulance.

2. Only in America...are there handicap parking places
in front of a skating rink.

3. Only in America...do drugstores
make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their
prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the
front.

4. Only in America...do people order double cheeseburgers,
large fries, and a diet coke.

5. Only in America...do banks leave
both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

6. Only in
America...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway
and put
our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in America...do we use
answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't
miss a
call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8.
Only in America...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in
packages
of eight.

9. Only in America...do we use the word 'politics' to
describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics'
meaning
'bloodsucking creatures'

.
10. Only in America...do they have
drive-up ATM's with Braille lettering.

A FRIEND WILL BACK UP A LIE
A BEST FRIEND WILL SWEAR TO IT IN COURT

A FRIEND WILL TRY TO STOP YOU FROM FIGHTING A STRANGER FOR LOOKING AT
YOU WRONG
A BEST FRIEND WILL BE UP IN THE STRANGERS FACE BEFORE YOU CAN GET UP

A FRIEND WILL TELL YOU WHEN YOU HAVE A BOOGER HANIGING OUT OF YOUR NOSE
A BEST FRIEND WILL LAUGH AND POINT AT YOU TILL YOU GET SO PISSED YOU HIT
THEM.

You know the speed of light;so what is the speed of dark ?

Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over.

Don't hate yourself in the morning - sleep till noon.

A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle

Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!

Guy: No, this is fun.

Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I love you, now slow down!

Guy: Now give me a big hug.

Girl: She gives him a big hug.

Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.

In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she could live. If you would do this for a loved one copy and paste

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy and paste this into your profile

The electric chair was invented by a dentist. If you are scared now more than ever of dentists by learning this fact, put this on your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, cpy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

Put this in your profile if you didn't know the Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star had the same tune. (okay, really, who the hell knew that?!)

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever stopped to look at something in the middle of a busy street, copy this into your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever crashed into a wall while you were sugar high, copy onto profile!

If you have ever felt the undeniable urge to slam your head into something, whether it is another person or not copy this into your profile.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.

you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

If you have ever said something twice, and when someone said something, you had no recollection of saying it either time, copy and paste to your profile.

If you have ever asked the same question 3 times in 5 minutes, copy and paste this to your profile.

dont forget 2 add 2 this, cause if u think about it, its loads of fun

Haha this 1 made me lol

Signs you live in 2008

1. You are on your computer everyday

2. You are more inside, than out.

4. You are on this site often.

5. As you read this, you keep nodding and smiling.

6. You were too busy, reading, nodding, and of course smiling, that you didn't notice there wasn't a number three.

7. You looked back to see if there was a number three.

8. You feel a bit stupid.

9. You think this is funny.

10. You want to copy this in your profile, right now - feel free.

If you have ever wanted to slap someone, but restrained yourself, congratulations, and copy and paste this to your profile.

98 percent of teenagers, do drugs, have sex, and drink alcohol...put this in your profile if you like bagels.

I wear black so I must be a Goth.

I'm young so I must be naive.

I have good grades, so I must be a Nerd.

I love animals so I must become the crazy old cat lady.

I get depressed so I must be Emo.

I'm blonde so I must be an idiot.

I'm religious, so I must shove my beliefs down your throat.

I'm Native American, so I must be a savage.

I'm a white girl, so I must be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.

I'm pretty, so I must not be a virgin.

I have straight A's, so I must be easy.

I'm a virgin, so I must be prude

I'm a girl who actually eats lunch, so I must be fat.

I'm single, so I must be ugly.

I'm Christian, so I must hate homosexuals.

I love shopping, so I must be rich.

I hate stereotypes and think people should just shut up an stop, Post this.

If you have an odd sort of love/hate relationship with your computer, copy this to your profile.

If you have ever seen a movie or read a book so many times that you can quote it word for word, and do so at random moments, copy and past this to your profile.

If you believe some teachers are seriously prejudiced, copy an paste this in your profile.

If you have ever threatened your computer, copy and paste this into your profile.

If keyboards hate you, copy and paste this.

If you have ever choked on air (or any other substance you thought impossible to choke on), copy this in your profile.

I'm bored...If you’re bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do...

If you’re hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If several inanimate objects just seem to hate you (stupid locker!) copy and paste this to your profile.

If you agree that 90 percent of politics are dumb, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you are against any kind of abuse, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious, snobby people please copy and paste this into your profile.

If you talk to yourself and aren't afraid to admit it copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have music in your soul copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever accidentally stabbed yourself or someone else with a pencil copy and paste this in your profile.

If you are against animal cruelty put this in your profile.

If you get too excited for books, movies, etc. to come out copy and paste this in your profile.

If you feel the need to read through someone's profile even when you don't know them, copy and paste this into your profile

Only crazy people understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, put this in your profile.

If you read people’s profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

30 percent of kids go to college. The other 70 either drop-out or don't have the proper skills to. If you are in the 30 percent that you know you're going to go to college, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you don't do drugs and never will, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think cancer is awful, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" thingies, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile.

65 percent of teenagers spend more time watching TV rather then reading ,if you are part of the 35 percent who read more than watch TV and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever spent too much money at Barnes and Noble, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever been so obsessed with a song you actually A) dream about it, B) sing it in school no matter who's listening or, C) know the lyrics by heart and sing it no matter how of key you are, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you forgot your phone number when some one asks for it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have written a fanfic, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are bored and like to write stuff, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever missed your mouth when trying to take a sip of water, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself/someone else, copy and paste this into your profile.

If someone has ever said something to you that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think Orlando Bloom is cute, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like singing songs at random points in the day, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, which makes weird good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy & paste this onto your profile

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder

If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.

Ideas don't stay in some minds very long because they don't like solitary confinement

Why is it called 'after dark' when it really is 'after light'?

Save the earth. It's the only planet with chocolate.

No I won't go to hell! It has a restraining order against me.

I'm not so good with the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my super powers.

Oh, I have a photographic memory... it just hasn't developed yet
If you have ever touched something and broken it when it clearly says DO NOT TOUCH! if you have put this on your profile

If you're Defying Gravity, and no one can pull you down, copy this into your profile.

If you walk and trip or stumble because your too busy reading a book copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.

If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your profile!

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing, or a combination of both, copy and paste this into your profile.

If there are times where you just wanna annoy someone for the heck of it copy this into your profile

If you are insane and proud of it, copy this into your profile.

If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, copy this into your profile

If you've ever spelled your name wrong, copy and paste this into your profile

If you're happy and you know it clap your hands...and then copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension. Copy and paste this in your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

A Dads Poem

Her hair was up in a pony tail, her favorite dress tied with a bow.

Today was Daddy's Day at school, and she couldn't wait to go. But her mommy tried to tell her, that she probably should stay home.

Why the kids might not understand, if she went to school alone.

But she was not afraid; she knew just what to say. What to tell her classmates of why he wasn't there today. But still her mother worried, for her to face this day alone. And that was why once again, she tried to keep her daughter home.

But the little girl went to school eager to tell them all. About a dad she never sees a dad who never calls. There were daddies along the wall in back, for everyone to meet.

Children squirming impatiently, anxious in their seats. one by one the teacher called a student from the class. To introduce their daddy, as seconds slowly passed.

At last the teacher called her name, every child turned to stare. each of them was searching, for a man who wasn't there.

"Where's her daddy at?" she heard a boy call out.

"She probably doesn't have one," another student dared to shout.

And from somewhere near the back, she heard a daddy say, "Looks like another deadbeat dad, too busy to waste his day."

The words did not offend her, she smiled up at her Mom and looked back at her teacher, who told her to go on.

And with hands behind her back, slowly she began to speak. And out from the mouth of a child, came words incredibly unique.

"My Daddy couldn't be here, because he lives so far away. But I know he wishes he could be, since this is such a special day. And though you cannot meet him, I wanted you to know. All about my daddy, and how much he loves me so. He loved to tell me stories, he taught me to ride my bike. He surprised me with pink roses, and taught me to fly a kite. We used to share fudge sundaes, and ice cream in a cone. And though you cannot see him. I'm not standing here alone. "Cause my daddy's always with me, even though we are apart I know because he told me, he'll forever be in my heart"

With that, her little hand reached up, and lay across her chest. Feeling her own heartbeat, beneath her favorite dress. And from somewhere in the crowd of dads, her mother stood in tears. Proudly watching her daughter, who was wise beyond her years. For she stood up for the love of a man not in her life. Doing what was best for her, doing what was right. And when she dropped her hand back down, staring straight into the crowd. She finished with a voice so soft, but its message clear and loud.

"I love my daddy very much, he's my shining star. And if he could, he'd be here, but heaven's just too far. You see he was a fireman and died just this past year when airplanes hit the towers and taught Americans to fear. But sometimes when I close my eyes, it's like he never went away."

And then she closed her eyes, and saw him there that day. And to her mother’s amazement, she witnessed with surprise. A room full of daddies and children, all starting to close their eyes. Who knows what they saw before them, who knows what they felt inside. Perhaps for merely a second, they saw him at her side.

"I know you're with me Daddy," to the silence she called out.

And what happened next made believers, of those once filled with doubt. Not one in that room could explain it, for each of their eyes had been closed. But there on the desk beside her, was a fragrant long-stemmed pink rose.

And a child was blessed, if only for a moment, by the love of her shining star. And given the gift of believing, that heaven is never too far.

‘They’ say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but then an entire life to forget them.

Send this to the people you'll never forget and remember to send it also to the person that sent it to you. It's a short message to let them know that you'll never forget them. If you don't send it to anyone, it means you're in a hurry and that you've forgotten your friends.

Two men walk into a bar, The third one ducks.

Boys are like lava lamps, fun to watch but not too bright.

Boys are like slinkeys. Useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

Its always in the last place you look...of course it is, why the hell would you keep looking after I found it?

It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up

Everything here is eatable. I'm eatable, but that my children is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies.

You know you live in 2008 when...

1. You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2. You haven’t played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is that they don't have AIM/LiveJournal/MySpace.

4. You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the button on the TV.

6. Your evening activity is sitting at the computer.

7. As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

8. You read this list, and keep nodding and smiling.

9. You think about how stupid you are for reading this.

10. You were too busy to notice number five.

11. You actually scrolled back up to check if there was a number five.

12. And now you're laughing at your stupidity.

13. Put this in your pro if you fell for it. You know you did.

If life gives you lemons, make grape juice, and let the world wonder how you did it.

RANDOM TIME!

Secret admirers are stalkers with stationary

"Shut up voices or I'll poke you with a fork"

Of course I'm talking to myself, who else can I trust?

Don't follow me, I'm lost too

At least I don't care what those mindless people think of me

I'm sick of following my dreams, I'm just gonna ask where their going and hook up with them later

Do I have to spell it out for you or scream it in you face?

Haha. I don't get it

So what if we act like immature idiots? We're having fun.

If at first you don't succeed skydiving isn't for you

Those who throw objects at crocodiles will be asked to retrieve them

Set sail in a genaral that way direction

Music is my boyfriend

Defination of Your Mom: How to answer a question when your bored

Poke me. I dare you.

This is Bob. Bob likes sharp things. I suggest you run from Bob.

Docters say I have multiple personalitys. We disagree with that.

I'll try to be nicer if you try to be smarter.

When life gives you lemons make apple juice and then laugh when people try to figure out what the hell you did.

When life gives you lemons, chuck them at people you hate.

It doesn't matter whether the glass is half empty or half full just drink it and get it over with.

It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.

The world is full of crazy people. THEY MADE ME THEIR LEADER.

Defination of homework: Some form of crude mind control still used in some priminal areas.

One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubburn to ask for directions.

WARNING: Do NOT walk in my footsteps... I tend to walk into walls, and off the occasional cliff.

I'm here because heaven wouldn't take me and hell was afraid i'd take over.

I'm not afraid of Death, what's it gonna do kill me?

Whenever you feel pissed off at someone walk a mile in there shoes, that way your a mile from them and you have their shoes. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Did you know Sarcasm is your body's natural defense against stupidity.

Have seen my sanity I seem to have lost it?

Never knock on Death's door, ring the doorbell and run away, he hate that.

Paper may beat rock, but cannon ball make big hole in paper.

The pen may be mightier than the sword, but my keyboard can crush your crummy pen!

Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer and then have them read in school about the wars that solved America's problems?

364 days of the years kids are told not to take candy from strangers, but on Halloween it's encouraged! Why is that?

An apple a day keeps the docter away, if well aimed.

Parents spend the first part of our lifes teaching us how to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

Boys are like trees- they take 50 years to grow up.

How are the force and duct tape the same?- They both have light and dark sides and hold the universe together.

Never go to a docter who's office plants have died.

Education is important, school however, is another matter.

Isn't Disney Land a people trap operated by a mouse?

When life hands you lemons throw them right back and tell life to make it's own dang lemonade!

The sun has set, the moon has risen, today's the day we get out of prison.

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say "I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out."?

Who was the first person to say "You see that chicken over there? I'm gonna eat the first thing that comes out of its butt."?

When french people swear do they say Pardon my English?

The difference between friends and best friends

F: Never asks for food or drink

BF: Is the reason your fridge is empty

F:Bail you out of jail

BF: In the next cell saying "man we messed up, again!"

F:Only knows a few things about you.

BF: Is writing a embarassing biography you don't know about as we speak.

F:Knocks on the door.

BF:Comes in saying "I'm Hoooooome"

25 reasons i owe my mother

1) My mother taught me to apprieciate a good job done (If your going to kill each other go outside, I just cleaned up)

2)My mother taught me Religion (You better pray that comes out of the carpet)

3)My mother taught me about time travel (If you dont straighten up, I'lll knock you into next week)

4)My mother taught me logic (Because I said so, thats why)

5)My mother taught me more logic ( If you fall out of that swing and break your next you can't come to the store with me)

6)My mother taught me foresight (Make sure you wear clean underwear in case your in an accident.)

7)My mother taught me irony (keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about)

8)My mother taught me about the science of osmosis (shut your mouth and eat your supper)

9)My mother taught me about the weather (that room of yours looks like a tornado went through it)

10)My mother taught me about contortionism (Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck)

11)My mother taught me about stamina (You will sit there until all that spinach is gone0

12)My mother taught me about hypocrisy (I i've told you once, i've told you a million times, don't exaggerate)

13)My mother taught me about the circle of life (I brought you into this world and I can take you out)

14)My mother taught me about behavior modification (stop acting like your father)

15)My mother taught me about envy (there are millions of children in the world who don't have great parents like you do)

16)My mother taught me about anticipation (Just wait until we get home)

17)My mother taught me medical science (If you don't stop crossing your eyes their going to freeze that way)

18)My mother taught me about recieving (Your going to get it when we get home)

19)My mother taught me about Esp (put your sweater on, don't you think I know when your cold)

20)My mother taught me about humor (when that lawnmower cuts off your toes don't come crying to me)

21)My mother taught me genetics (Your just like your father)

22)My mother taught me how to grow up (If you don't eat your vegetables you'll never grow up)

23)My mother taught me about my roots (Shut the door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?)

24)My mother taught me about wisdom( when you get to be my age you'll understand)

25)and my favorite: My mother taught me about justice (One day you'll have kids and I hope they're just like you)

IF YOUR ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE THAT GET EXCITED ABOUT TWO REVIEWS COPY THIS ONTO YOUR PROFILE

WHY DO BOYS FALL IN LOVE WITH GIRLS?? aww this is so sweet even though im a girl!! :D

So sweet, please don't break! :)

1. They will always smell good even if it's just shampoo.

2. The way their heads always find the right spot on our shoulder.

3. How cute they look when they sleep.

4. The ease in which they fit into our arms .

5. The way they kiss you and all of a sudden everything is right in the world.

6. How cute they are when they eat.

7. The way they take hours to get dressed but in the end it makes it all worth while.

8. Because they are always warm even when its minus 30 outside.

9. The way they look good no matter what they wear.

10. The way they fish for compliments even though you both know that you think she's the most beautiful girl on this earth.

11. How cute they are when they argue.

12. The way her hand always finds yours.

13. The way they smile.

14. The way you feel when you see their name on the call ID after you just had a big fight.

15. The way she says "lets not fight anymore" even though you know that an hour later...

16. The way that they kiss after you have had a fight.

17. The way they kiss you when you say "I love you".

18. Actually...Just the way they kiss you...

19. The way they fall into your arms when they cry.

20. Then the way they apologize for crying over something that silly.

21. The way they hit you and expect it to hurt.

22. Then the way they apologize when it does hurt (even though we don't admit it).

23. The way they say "I miss you".

24. The way you miss them.

25. The way their tears make you want to change the world so that it doesn't hurt her anymore...

Yet regardless if you love them, hate them, wish they would die or know that you would die without them it matters not. Because once in your life, whatever they were to the world they become everything to you. When you look them in the eyes, traveling to the depths of their souls and you say a million things without trace of a sound, you know that your own life is inevitable consumed within the rhythmic beatings of her very heart. We love them for a million reasons, no paper would do it justice. It is a thing not of the mind but of the heart.

A feeling.

Only felt.

This chain started in 2002.

It is a love chain letter.

In an hour you are supposed to repost this.

Now here comes the fun part.

You then say the name of the person you like or love and then the person will say "I love you," or "Will you go out with me?" NO JOKE!!

NOW THE CONSEQUENCES!!

The consequences are:

If you break the chain letter, you will have bad luck in future
relationships.

If you don't break the chain, then you will be a happy camper!!

Congratulations!!

You have been chosen to participate in the LONGEST and the LUCKIEST chain
letter on the internet.

Once you read this letter, you must IMMEDIATELY (meaning within the hour)
post it with the title "why do boys fall in love with girls?"
After you send it, make a wish and it will come TRUE

FOR MY STORIES!

Bella's Clubbing Outfit--

Rose's Clubbing Outfit--

Alice's Clubing Outfit--