It is said that Thorin Oakenshield, one of the mighty dwarven kings of old; is buried deep under the Lonely Mountain. Tales tell of the Great Age he lived in, but for many, including Hlífhrím, a young dwarf-woman from the Longbeard clan; these are just myths and legends - small glimmers of hope in a world growing ever darker. For this is the Fifth Age and Middle-Earth has changed.

Millie is completely ignorant to the world of Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit, thinks Kili is one dreamy Dwarf, and is completely incompetent. So what happens when she gets thrown into the journey with thirteen Dwarves, a Hobbit, and a Wizard? This is Millie's inconvenient and unexpected story. Inspired by The Awkward Adventures of Meghan Whimblesby by febuarysong. Complete.