I am cursed, lower then the low,"dirty"as my tormentors put it. But my beaten and defiled body must be tormented even more even if all I want is death. My new master is known to be cruel and even kill those that defy him, but I can do nothing, not even run or commit suicide because I am shackled to my master because I am his slave and mostly because I am lower then the low. Slavery

When you find a how-to guide on seducing Uchiha, you're clearly obligated to play what will possibly be the greatest prank ever on a one Uchiha Sasuke. At least, until things start going horribly wrong. Featuring vintage pornography, cross-dressing blondes, dramatic waterfalls, and kicked puppy faces; Not necessarily in that order. Crack fic for my lovely ships and crack tropes.