A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. A best friend will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

A good friend will be there for you when he breaks up with you. A best friend will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

A good friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, freak?"

A good friend helps you find your prince. A best friend kidnaps him and brings him to you.

A good friend will offer you a soda. A best friend will dump theirs on you.

A good friend will help you move. A best friend will help you move the bodies.

A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

A good friend has never seen you cry. A best friend won't tell anyone else that you cried...just laugh about it in private with you when you aren't down anymore.

A good friend asks you to write down your number. A best friend has you on speed dial.

A good friend knows a few things about you. A best friend could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story.

A good friend tells you she knows how you feel. A best friend just sits down and cries.

A good friend will help you learn to drive. A best friend will help you roll the car into the lake so you can collect insurance money.

BEST FRIENDS DON'T LET YOU DO STUPID THINGS... ALONE!

15 Things to do when your in a shopping center!

1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
" 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.

4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,
"Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.

10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look

12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
"NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"

14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There's no toilet paper in here!

15. Grab a lot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go!"

Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?

Boy: No.

Girl: Do you like me?

Boy: No.

Girl: Do you want me?

Boy: No.

Girl: Would you cry if I left?

Boy: No.

Girl: Would you live for me?

Boy: No.

Girl: Would you do anything for me?

Boy:No.

Girl: Choose—me or your life?

Boy: My life

The girl runs away in shock and pain and boy runs after and says..

The reason you don't cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.

The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.

The reason why I don't want you is because I need you.

The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is becauseI would die if you left.

The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.

The reason why I'm not willing to do anything for you is because I would do everything for you.

The reason I chose my life is becauseyou ARE my life.

Now... make a wish. Wish REALLY hard!! WISH WISH WISH WISH Your wish has just been received. Copy and Paste this into your profile in the next 15 minutes and...Your wish will be granted.

Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat... wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you' re just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky he is to have YOU...If you want this kind of guy, copy and paste this into your profile.

Girls are like
apples on trees. The best
ones are at the top of the tree.
The boys don't want to reach for
the good ones because they are afraid
of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they
just get the rotten apples from the ground
that aren't as good, but easy. So the apples
at the top think something is wrong with
them, when in reality, they're amazing.
They just have to wait for the right
boy to come along, the one
who's brave enough
to climb
all the way
to the top of the tree.

When you see her at her worst
-Tell her she's beautiful

When you see her start crying
-Just hold her and don’t say a word

When you see her walking
-Sneak up and hug her waist from behind

When she's scared
-Protect her

When she lay's her head on your shoulder
-Tilt her head up and kiss her

When she steal's your favorite hat
-Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night

When she teases you
-Tease her back and make her laugh

When she bump's into you
-bump into her back and make her laugh

When she tells you a secret
-keep it safe and untold

When she looks at you in your eyes
-dont look away until she does

When you break her heart
-the pain never really goes away

Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her ( Note to future boyfriends- do this to me and i will f* murder you!)

Tease her and let her tease you back.

Stay up all night with her when she's sick.

Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.

Give her the world.

Let her wear your clothes.

Let her know she's important.

Kiss her in the pouring rain.

When she runs up at you crying,-
the first thing you say is; "Who's ass am I kicking?"

Oh my gosh i will NEVER get an abortion(unless im raped or something, cuz then the baby would always be a devil child to me)

Month one

Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here

Month Three

You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus's arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just

One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

If you're against abortion, re-post this on your profile.

One day, I wondered why the frisbee was getting bigger, Then it hit me

Boys are like lava lamps, fun to watch but not too bright.

Boys are like slinkeys. Useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

Its always in the last place you look...of course it is, why the hell would you keep looking after I found it?

It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile, and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.

If life gives you lemons, make grape juice, and let the world wonder how you did it.

"Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes."

Everything here is eatable. I'm eatable, but that my children is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies.

Of course I'm talking to myself, who else can I trust?

One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.

I'm not afraid of Death, what's it gonna do, kill me?

Take the damn bull by the horns!

Ignore the loser who decided that's how you should be labeled,and pass on to them :''Hey,loser!Repeat who the idiot is?I believe you said that it was you and still is.''

You don't need any help deciding who and what exactly you are and want to be,so throw the damn label away.

Best friends are the people who will stick up for you,

laugh at you because they know you'll forgive them,

Are the ones who care and love you,

Laugh at all you jokes even if they aren't that funny,

Cry when your down, even if they don't know why your crying,

They'll have their shovels ready to bury the one who made you unhappy,

They'll break the guy's face if he decides to break your heart.

So that means you've got to look out for them as well,it's your job.

Charm is getting he answer without asking a clear question

A smile a day keep the haters away

I don't get it. Why does crossing yor fingers mean t wish for god luck and that your lieing?

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:Dlolz