Hello and good day. I do beseech you not to call me a calling from heaven with full intent to save your souls by throwing flames upon yourselves.

I am simple being with mechanisms similar to that of those around me with opposable thumbs and the ability to use a laptop to perform functions such as writing a profile.

Well-rehearsed in logic and rhetoric, I have taken it upon myself to absorb many negative sentiments of those of you who feel wronged by self-proclaimed vigilantes and remodel such sentiments into something new. It is simply my deepest conviction that words are weapons sharper than a clean blade, and like weapons they are best equipped with wisdom and perhaps a little wit ;]

While I do possess a separate account for more leisurely purposes (an account to remain unknown for security reasons and cowardly reasons alike), I will say here and now that the existence of this account has relatively serious and perhaps even Juvenalian undertones.

Feel free to stay a while.