I solemnly swear I am up to no good.

Hi!

I am a female

I am younger than you think. Unless you're thinking ten years old. I'm older than that.

I'm an Aries.

I live in the best state, which is home to the biggest football fanatics, the most prideful, most bestest people in the world. As you can tell, I am past Leslie Knope proud of my state. (If you need more hints: Our state ghost is Leo Burt. If you figure it out, give me a PM)

I am a Christian, so I believe homosexuality is wrong, but that doesn't mean homosexuals don't deserve rights. They're people too.

I love to learn about serial killers, mass murderers and school shooters because I find them interesting. Their minds fascinate me, the way they work, why they do certain things, what triggered them to do what they do. It's... just so... fascinating. They're a part of history. Why can't I be interested in learning about that type of history without being told I'm insane and being called names?

Facts about me.

~I do a lot of dumb things.

~I tend to not sleep around the full moon.

~I can survive of three hours of sleep for one week.

~The only type of coffee I like is black coffee. Because it's black and bitter. Just like my soul and my normal mood. Also, sugary coffee tastes terrible to me.

~Poutine and Cheeseburgers are the best foods ever.

~I have met my hero before. His name is Henry Winkler. If you do not know who he is, shame on you.

~I have over 10,000 memes on my phone. Yeahh, I should probably go through them and delete some

~ My dream job is either an FBI agent or a Police Profiler.

~ I prefer songs from the 50's-90's

~My favourite song artist is David Bowie

~My favourite TV Shows are How I Met Your Mother, Supernatural, Sherlock, That 70's Show, The Drew Carey Show, Happy Days, The Brady Bunch and many others

If you ever need a laugh, just PM me because my humour is dirtier than mud, drier than the Sahara in a drought, darker than my soul, which is darker than a night with no moon in the middle of nowhere.

If you're afraid to PM me here's some jokes.

Dad finally let me have some coffee and I took a drink and said, "ahh, black and bitter. Just like my soul." And I started laughing so hard I nearly fell over and dad just looked at floor, unimpressed and I said, "you have no idea how long I've been waiting to tell you that one."

"Always run from something in the fog! Oh, wait. That's just Jeff."
"Jeff's dead."
"RUN!"

Once when it was dark out and I only had the light of the TV and I mistook my brother's shoes for my cat and went over to pet him and said "You're just the cutest" and realized I was about to pet shoes.

One time I was writing a story and wanted to name the main character after my two favourite actors and then realized both my favourite actors names are David and I was about to name the guy David David, then I went to my favourite artist/songwriter, but his name is David, too.

One time I got sent to the principal's office (happens a lot) for drawing a knife in class (I was trying to draw a knife by memory) and my principal asked me if I have bad thoughts and I scoffed and said,

"It's not like I have a picture of Jeffrey Dahmer on my wall with hearts and flowers all around it."

Mischief Managed