Hi there! I don't really feel like typing out my life story, but I think these things are funny, so here you go.

If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself/someone else, copy this into your profile.

If you have inside jokes...with yourself...copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over air, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped up the stairs, copy and paste this into your profile.

If there are times where you wanna annoy people, just for the heck of it copy this to your profile.

If you still laugh rereading Maximum Ride, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you'll take the first watch, copy and paste this to you're profile. (if you don't get it, THEN READ MAXIMUM RIDE!)

98 percent of teens do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the two percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.

Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you're a nerd and proud of it, copy this into your profile. (Don't insult the Nerd)

If you're a girl but the furthest thing from a damsel-in-distress, copy and past this into your profile.

If you have ever pulled a door that said push, copy this into your profile

If you're in love with the MR series, copy this into your profile

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird (which, of course, doesn't make it impossible). If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile

If you love walking around in the pouring rain without an umbrella, copy this to your profile.

If you've read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy this to your profile.

If you're the kind of person who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like being utterly random copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have ever said a number, but held up the wrong amount of fingers, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you get a kick out of explosions, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy and paste this into your profile

Most writers don't know the difference between 'there', 'their' and 'they're', 'you're and 'your', 'its' and 'it's'. If you do know the difference and would like to throttle people who don't, copy and paste this into your profile.

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters...copy and paste this onto your profile

If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similiar, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something in your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction, copy this to your profile.

If you are the kind of person that gets really excited when you get like two reviews, copy this into your profile.

If you ever pushed on a door that said "Pull" copy this into your profile.

If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.

If you think Twilight has more fame than it's worth, copy this into your profile.

If several inanimate objects hate you post this on profile.

Type your name with your elbow: 5rqajnmrrrrrrrr0okje4wews222288u44j (holy moly!)

Type your name with your nose: rqheokjhessque3e3h (slighly better)

Type your name without looking: randomnessqueen (finally!)

Type your name with your left foot: rrandeomnjessqqujedednh

"I walk, talk, eat and sleep on Earth, but I live my life in a completely different world." If this sentence describes you, copy and paste on your profile.

In a high school in Montana a group of high schoolers played a prank on the school. They let three goats loose in the school. Before they let them go, they painted numbers on the sides of the goats... 1, 2 & 4. local school administrators spent most of the day looking for #3. If you think that kids and teens are smart, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever been loved someone to the point that you would happily give up your life for them, copy and paste this into your profile.

BoyGirl, BoyBoy, GirlGirl. If it all equals love, then what's the problem? I support LGBT rights. If you agree, copy and paste this into your profile.

Did you know the average American only reads 3 books a year? If you don't believe that it's even possible to read that little, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever snuck on FanFiction when you were supposed to be doing something else, say, your homework, copy and paste into your profile

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous FanFictions, copy this onto your profile

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing, or a combination of both, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever read a 250 pg book in less than one day, copy and paste this into your profile

If you loved DH, HBP, OotP, GoF, PoA, CoS, and SS/PS, and know what all those initials stand for, copy and paste this on your account.

If you cried during the last Harry Potter movie, take a tissue and copy and paste this into your profile.

If you know that there ain't no power in the verse can stop the BrownCoats, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you share River Tam's taste in shoes, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're afraid of the dark because of the inherent absence of light, copy and paste this into your profile.

Here are more things that I find amusing:

Those who say words can never hurt you have never gotten a dictionary thrown at them.

Never Go To Bed Angry... Stay Awake and Plot Your Revenge...

It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.

If life gives you lemons, make grape juice, and let the world wonder how you did it.

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, if they get mad, you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes.

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up

Of course I'm talking to myself, who else can I trust?

I dream of a better world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned.

One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.

Don't knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.

Of course I'm out of my mind! It's dark and scary in there!

If you can't convince them, confuse them.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you.

What happens if you get scared half to death... twice?

Never do anything that you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics.

Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film

Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity got framed

One day, I was lying in bed thinking about life, and then I asked myself, 'Where did I go wrong?' and the little voice in my head answered, 'This is gonna take longer than one night'

Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side

The difference between school and life? in school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test on it. In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson

You haven't lived until you've found something worth dying for.

A common mistake that people make when they are trying to design something completley foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools

I'm the kind of girl who walks into a door/lamppost/trash can and apologizes.

I'm the kind of girl who would burst out laughing in a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.

I'm the kind of girl who would get fired at the M&M's company for throwing out the w's.

I'm the kind of girl who would rather love a guy from a book than in real life.

I'm the kind of girl who gets drunk off sugar-free soda and loves every minute of it.

I'm the kind of girl who pays attention to the details, then forgets everything in the next minute.

Only in America...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance

Only in America...are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

Only in America...do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in America...do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

Only in America...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

Only in America...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

Only in America...do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

Only in America...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

Only in America...do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'

Only in America...do they have drive-up ATM's with Braille lettering.

They say "Guns don't kill people, people with guns kill people." Well, I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

Beware the letter "G." It is the end of everything.

If you try to fail and succeed, which have you done?

Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.

When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.

BEWARE OF VIOLINSTS: We are secretly planning to take over the world.

YES, I am random, thanks for asking.

1,2,3, more than three...

Whoever said "anything is possible" never tried to slam a revolving door

Silence is golden but duct tape is silver

The word "bed" actually looks like one!

Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

THINK. It's not illegal yet.

I'll start acting NICER if you start acting SMARTER.

MAXIMUM RIDE FAN QUESTIONS:

1. Do you think Iggy is hot?

Oh yeah. Pyromaniac who cooks? Do they get hotter?

2. Did you cry when Ari died?

I didn't cry, but I was sad.

3. Do you think Fang is hot?

There is only one way to answer this question. Yes.

4. How do you pronounce Ari's name?

I said it arr-eee (like a pirate, then like the beginning of eel) until I started watching the Ari Haswari story arc of NCIS, at which point I started pronouncing them the same way.

5. Do you laugh every time you read the name Mr. Chu?

A little bit.

6. In MAX, did you laugh hysterically when Total started talking about marriage?

No! Total was so earnest and so adorable.

7. Did you squeal at all the faxness in MAX?

I was squealing on the inside.

8. Did you angrily throw your book across the room when the flock split up?

No, I was kind of in shock.

9. Who is your favorite character?

Max.

10. Do you like Jeb?

No. He bugs the excrement out of me.

11. Were you making a genuine "WTF" face when Max and Fang grew gills?

I was just like "Okay. That's...interesting."

12. Did you think MAX was better than TFW?

Totally, but it still wasn't as good as the original trilogy.

13. Did you get slightly fed up with Nudge and Angel's slight attitudes in MAX?

Not really. I don't get all the Angel hate that's going on. I think that there's something going on with Angel that JP hasn't let us in on- maybe she's being mind-controlled? That would be ironic...anyways, to answer the question, no.

14. Which book is your all time favorite?

Hmm, that's tough...I'm going to have to go with The Angel Experiment.

15. If the flock had a theme song, what would it be?

I have no idea. I always think of Max whenever I hear "A Place in this World" by Taylor Swift, because at one point, it goes "Maybe I'm just a girl on a mission, but I'm ready to fly." Sound familiar, anyone?

16. Have you ever imagined the flock as a band playing whatever song comes up when listening to your iPod?

I don't have an iPod. Or iPad, or mP3, or anything like that.

17. Who do you think the voice should be?

I honestly think the voice should just go away. He/she/it annoys me.

18. Do you think one or more members of the flock should learn to play an instrument?

I imagine Nudge as a really great singer. I can totally see Fang playing the drums, or Angel playing some woodwind instrument. I feel like Gazzy could play some lesser-known instrument, like the oboe or bassoon something. Iggy could do "special effects" (i.e. blow stuff up onstage). As for Max...the conducter seems like a natural spot for her.

19. What bugged you the most about TFW?

The fact that the whole book was pretty much a "Save the planet" lecture.

MIGGY or FAX?

Fax. All the way.

100 Stupid Things People Always Do

Put the ones you've done in bold.

1. Forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out

2. Gotten your head stuck between the stair rails

3. Broken a chair by leaning back in it

4. Had gum fall out of your mouth while you were talking

5. Choked on your own spit while you were talking

6. Had people tell you that you are blonde when you're not/or had had people tell you that your blonde highlights are going to your head

7. Been caught staring at your crush by your crush him/herself

8. Have looked for something for at least 10 min then realized it was in your hand

9. Tried to push open a door that said pull

10. Tried to pull open a door that said push

11. Have actually believed someone when they said that they knew how to make a love potion

12. Have hit yourself in the process of trying to hit something else

14. Have actually exploded marshmallows in the microwave

15. Have gotten gum stuck in your hair

16. Had gum fall out of your mouth while trying to blow a bubble

17. Have had the juice from a mini tomato squirt out and hit somebody else when you bit into it

18. Have had your drink come out your nose because you were laughing so hard

19. Have called one of your good friends by the wrong name

20. Have skinned your toe because you were playing soccer or kickball with flip flops on or you were barefoot

21. Have put a sticker on your forehead, forgot it was there, and went out in public with it on

22. Have fallen out of a moving vehicle.

23. Have run into a closed door

24. Have almost shot someone with a real gun while trying to shoot something else

25. Searched for your cell phone while you were talking on it

26. It has taken you longer than 5 min to get a joke (try 6 months...no, I'm not kidding, sadly)

27. Have gotten your hair stuck in a blow dryer

28. Have gotten your hair stuck in a fan

29. Tripped on a crack in the sidewalk

30. Said o'clock after saying how many min after the hour, example: 5:30 o'clock, or 6:15 o'clock

31. After someone told you that there was gum on the ground, you stepped in it

32. Put on a white shirt even though you already knew it was raining outside

33. Have ever walked up to a stranger because you thought they were someone else

34. Ever been kicked out of a grocery store off their property

35. Touched the stove, the curling iron, a hot pan, etc on purpose even though you knew it was hot

36. Picked out your change of clothes, took off the ones you had on and then accidentally put the old clothes back on

37. Wondered why something wasn't working then realized it wasn't plugged in

38. Put the cereal in the fridge, or put the milk in the cupboard

39. Walked into a pole

40. Wore two different earrings, socks, or shoes by accident

41. Put your shirt on backwards/inside-out without realizing it then left your house

42. Tried to take a picture of your/someone's eye with the flash on

43. Gotten a ring stuck on your finger because you put it on even though you knew it was too small

44. Walked out of the bathroom with toilet paper stuck to your shoe without realizing it

45. Went to go do something/go get something, then when you got there forgot what is was that you were going to do.

46. Picked up someone else's drink and drank out of it by accident when your drink was right next to it

47. Fallen out of your chair while trying to pick something up

48. Have poked yourself in the eye

49. Have gotten in the shower with your socks still on

50. Melted your hairbrush while blow drying your hair

51. Have done enough stupid things to make a test

52. Have accidentally stabbed yourself with a pencil

53. Have sung the wrong verse to a song without realizing it

54. Have given an odd answer to a question because you didn't hear the question in the first place and didn't feel like asking what it was.

55. Told someone you were the wrong age because you seriously forgot how old you were

56. Looked into an overhead light purposely while it was on

57. Got up early and got ready for school/work/meeting, then realized that you didn't have school/work/meeting that day.

58. Have tripped on a cord after someone told you to watch out for it

60. Have ever laughed at a joke or movie that no one else thought was funny

61. Done the Macarena to the electric slide or vice versa

62. Said funner, then had someone make fun of you for it

63. Have repeated yourself at least twice in the same sentence

64. Brought up an inside joke with the wrong person

65. Didn't do the backside of an assignment because you thought that there wasn't one or because you had already looked and forgot that there was another side

66. Did more work than you had to on an assignment because you didn't read the directions

67. Corrected someone's grammar/pronunciation then figured out that you were the one that was wrong

68. Put something in a special place so that you would remember where it was, then forgot where you put it

69. Put ice in your drink after the glass was full of liquid and had it splash out.

70. Told a lie then forgot what it was that you had said and got caught

71. When wearing goggles, you pulled them away from your face and let go so that they would come back and snap you in the face

72. Forgot to make sure that the lamp was off before you replaced the light bulb

73. Ran into a door jam

74. Told someone that you hardly ever do stupid things, then immediately did/said something stupid

75. Told someone to watch out for something, then you were the one that ran into it

76. Have purposely licked playground sand

77. Have purposely and repeatedly flicked yourself with a rubber band

78. Gotten so hyper that someone actually thought you were drunk when you weren't

79. Have been so hyper you actually scared people (Yes!)

80. Put duct tape on your body then pulled it off to see if it would pull your hairs out

81. Put duct tape on your hair/someone else's hair then pulled it off

82. Put a clothes pin/hair clip on your lip, figured out that it hurt, then did it again

83. Sat and wondered why men’s dress shirts have a loop on the back

84. Made up a code name for someone so that you could talk about them to someone else and no one else would know who you were talking about

85. Have gotten a hairbrush stuck in your hair

86. Used the straw to blow the straw wrapper at someone

87. Shaved your tongue because you thought your taste buds looked weird

88. When at a restaurant/cafeteria, you used your spoon to fling stuff at people

89. Have flung forks at people in a restaurant/cafeteria

90. Sucked on a cup and got a hickey from it.

91. As you were writing, you moved your head back and forth with your pen/pencil

92. Have drawn finger puppets on your fingers then named them

93.Have wrapped someone in a roll of toilet paper (actually I was the one being wrapped, but I let my friend do it)

94. Have used somebody else's toothbrush without even realizing it wasn't yours

95. Started telling a story and forget what you were talking about or what happened in the story

96. When you saw a ‘beware of dog’ sign, you told the owners to beware of the dogs not realizing they owned the dogs

97. You have spelled your own name wrong before

98. When lying in bed you look for pictures in the texture of the ceiling

99. Have used your calculator as a form of communication in class

100. Have popped a balloon in your mouth

Why is Charlie short for Charles if they are the same number of letters?

Don’t mess with me, I've got a stick.

Don't follow in my footsteps, I tend to walk into walls

Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

Isn't it scary that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why do they use sterilized needles for lethal injections?

I ran with scissors and lived!

Note to Self: Normal is just a setting on washing machines.

If annoyed further, I shall spork your eyes out.

There’s a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.

Rules are you can only say guilty or innocent. You can't explain any of your answers unless someone asks you!

Asked someone to marry you? Innocent

Kissed one of your Facebook friends? Innocent

Danced on a table in a bar? Innocent

Ever told a lie? Guilty

Had feelings for someone whom you can't have back? Guilty

Kissed a picture? Guilty

Slept in until 5 PM? Innocent

Fallen asleep at work/school? Innocent

Held a snake? Guilty

Been suspended from school? Innocent

Worked at a fast food restaurant? Innocent

Stolen from a store? Innocent

Been fired from a job? Innocent

Done something you regret? Guilty

Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose? Guilty

Caught a snowflake on your tongue? Innocent

Kissed in the rain? Innocent

Sat on a roof top? Innocent

Kissed someone you shouldn't? Innocent

Sang in the shower? Guilty

Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on? Innocent

Shaved your head? Innocent

Been told that you're handsome or beautiful by someone who totally meant what they said? Guilty

Had communication w/ your ex? Innocent

DATING Someone? Innocent

A total stranger treat you by paying your jeepney/ cab fare? Innocent

Milked a cow? Guilty

Enjoyed your vegetables as a child? Innocent

Spoiled as a child? Innocent

Written love notes but never handed them out? Guilty

Draw in class instead of doing your work? Guilty

Girls: has your BF ever taken you to the dollar movie theatre? Innocent

Enjoy music? Guilty

Spend more time on your MySpace than cleaning your room? Innocent

Want to be a monster? Innocent

Get embarrassed easy? Guilty

Is 7 your lucky number? Innocent

Are you an early bird? Innocent

Do you write poetry? Guilty

Know how to swim? Guilty

Have a hidden stash of money? Guilty

Clean your ears? Guilty

Like the sound of the ocean? Guilty

I can think of nothing else to put, so au revoir. Have a nice day, and don't let the rabbits eat your brains.